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Selfish to want more?

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Selfish to want more?

Postby sokru8 » Sat Mar 21, 2009 12:55 am

I havent been on this website in a LONG time because after two rounds of IVF my husband and I were bless with the most beautiful twin girls ever. Right now they are 16 months old.
We have been talking about doing another round of IVF this summer. We dont have any snow babies so would be doing the whole thing over again. I really want more children. Especially a little boy! :lol:
Is it selfish to want more? I know how many women on here try and try to concieve and dont. I remember the heart break of my failed cycle. It put me into a horrid depression. I dont have that luxury this time because I have my girls.... I just am not sure I am ready for the roller coaster but I am also not getting any younger!

Thanks for letting me vent
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Postby shantala » Sun Mar 22, 2009 8:00 pm

hey sonya!!

long time no speak!! how you doing?? wow, love the picture of your girls...wow, 16 months!! doesn't time fly!!

i dont think you're being selfish at all. you just appreciate the gift you've been given through ivf and there's nothing wrong with wanting more of that special gift. it doesnt mean you appreciate your success any less.

anyway, hope you're well.

xxx
2nd IVF/ICSI - baby girl Elliana born 21.4.08 weighing 7lb 6.5ounces; 7 frosties left...
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Postby sokru8 » Sun Mar 22, 2009 10:37 pm

Hey Shantal!
It has been forever! How are you? How is your little one?

We decided to make an appointment tomorrow with the clinic and just discuss the options. I just know I love being a mom. I would have 5 kids if I could!

Hope you are well
S.
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Postby nicolamark » Mon Mar 23, 2009 12:14 pm

Hi ya huney....

Its not at all selfish, you have to do whats right for you.
I'll catch up with you laters, but best of luck xxx
TTC 9yrs...lots of IUIs all BFN
1st IVF cancelled OHSS
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise
3rd IVF down regging now, EC expected 1st wk of sept.
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Postby ianmichael3 » Mon Mar 23, 2009 2:56 pm

Nope, I don't think it's selfish either. DH and I are experiencing secondary IF........ so no, it isn't selfish at all. I think everyone has a certain "picture" of what they hope their family will look like and mine wasn't ever with just one. But, that might just be what was in God's plan for us, I'm certainly blessed and haven't taken them for granted (DH and DS). They are the best ever, but I still have a little whole in my heart that I'd carved out space for another one or even two.

Hang in there & when you're ready to try, try again, you'll know.

BABY DUST TO ALL!
Nicole, 35 DH, 40 (morphology)
DS 6 (natural conception after 10mos)
secondary IF, TTC 2nd child since 7/07
1st IUI 3/8: BFN, OOPS, wait, BFP 3/28!!
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Postby bdantonio » Mon Mar 23, 2009 8:30 pm

i agree with them all its not selfish.. I always wanted at least three. However it wasnt in the cards for me. I couldnt take anymore losses and the dr's told me my body could not take another pg, and that the next one may take my life. Otherwise i may have tried one more time.
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Postby Hope644 » Tue Jun 02, 2009 10:44 pm

hi sokru, shantala & everyone-

I just stumbled on this thread and had to chime in. My precious little Gage is almost 6 months old and my DH and I have been discussing trying again as well. I think the others are right, it's not selfish... for me, i think it's a good thing for Gage. He has 3 older half brothers (my DSS's = but they are all older, 13, 15, & 17). I hope to give him a sibling (the boys all want a girl, but I'll take a healthy baby!) So I say go for it!

Our only problem is $$$ and timing. Due to my DH's vasectomy, insurance doesnt cover for us. And of course, I have to be completely done breastfeeding before we can start trying again and right now, Gage doesn't show any signs of wanting to give that up! So, we'll wait until Oct-Nov and see how it looks then.

Wishing you the best!!
IVF 1st-BFN, 2nd-BFP mc 8wk,
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Postby sokru8 » Tue Jun 02, 2009 10:49 pm

Aww congrats your baby! 6 months is such an awesome fun age! I wish you the best and hope you will be blessed with another sweet baby!
We have decided to go forth after much debate!
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Re: Selfish to want more?

Postby MamaBoo » Sun Jan 09, 2011 3:29 am

I don't think it is selfish to want more. Having children isn't a zero sum proposition. Getting pregnant doesn't mean you take the baby someone else would have had. It is about creating a new life, not divvying up what already exists. :D
Me 34 endo, MTHFR, clotting issues
DH 47 semi-low morphology
TTC 6 yrs
3 IUI's all BFN
IVF#1: 10/08 BFP early MC
FET#1: 03/09 BFP
DS born 11/28/09
FET#2: 03/11
DS born 11/21/2011
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