Discussion group for all topics related to infertility including preparation for pregnancy, causes, investigation and treatment of infertility.
- Posts: 1
- Joined: Tue May 25, 2010 5:06 pm
I hope that all of you amazingly brave ladies will forgive me for asking this. Although I'm not considering IVF treatment myself, I'm invloved in a debate in which I am arguing in favour for IVF, because I think it is a wonderful thing. I would hate to misrepresent anything, so I would be so grateful if anyone would explain to me why you have chosen to go for IVF rather than adopting, or using a surrogate or any other option, and the benefits that it has had for you. As I am neither a current mother, or a hopeful mother at this stage it would be wonderful to receive your insights.
- Posts: 530
- Joined: Wed Jun 21, 2006 9:28 pm
- Location: Kent, England
Our reasons for choosing IVF were purely because we knew that carrying a baby wouldn't be the problem, my womb is healthy, but just the getting pregnant part due to my endometriosis. I think we both decided that IVF would be the first thing we would try, and if that had failed, we would explore other options. As a woman I wanted the chance to experience pregnancy and childbirth and when you have a condition such as endometriosis, to the extent that I have it, you can feel like that right as a woman has been snatched away from you. We did attend open days with Adoption agencies which we found very insightful, and as I say, if we hadn't been as lucky as we have been with IVF, we would definitely have looked into adoption in more detail.
Hope this helps.
ME 38 DH 32
1st IVF Sept 06 - BFN
2nd IVF Jan 07 - BFP! Ruby May born 24.10.07
3rd IVF March 10 - BFP on 30.3.10! Iris Josephine born 1.12.10
Our family is complete
- Posts: 266
- Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 9:02 pm
- Location: United Kingdom
Many years ago we started trying for a baby. You think that you will be lucky and get pregnant within a few months. 2 years later nothing. Every one around you is having babies with seemingly no problems. It is heartbreaking. We started having tests, which took a long time. We were diagnosed with some factors which meant we could not get pregnant naturally. In both our families this was strange.
We sat down and had a long talk and did so many times. We wanted our own child that ws biologically ours. I wanted to experience being pregnant, to feel like a 'normal woman'. We did not want to adopt. The problem with adoption for us is that we would struggle to be accepted due to some health issues but we were allowed to have IVF paid on the NHS twice. Also, many adopted children are encouraged to stay in contact with their biological parents and I did not think I could handle this. I admire people who can but it is also important to recognise when it is not for you.
We were lucky, our dreams came true and we had our little miracle in March after 2 IVF cycles.
I don't know if we would have reconsidered our options if it had not worked but I am so happy that we do not need to make that decision
Me - 32 DH - 37
IVF 1: BFN IVF 2: BFP!
Freddie was born at 14.09 on 29/03/10 at 8lb 14oz.
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1180
- Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 2:18 am
- Location: Ohio
Katie - My husband and I chose IVF because we have been married for 10 years and have lost several children through natural pregnancies, which made it nearly impossible to conceive naturally again. I also want the feeling of carrying my own child; feeling him or her kick for the first time, and seeing them on the ultrasound for the first time. It is an amazing feeling! I think that adoption is an excellent choice for couples who feel it is right for them. My husband and I would like to definitely like to look into adoption in the future. But, from what I have seen so far through my research, the adoption process is not an easy process at all in the United States. In fact, it seems like it is pretty difficult for couples to adopt. Surrogacy had crossed my mind but the fact that I have been pregnant before, I knew I could become pregnant again with the right circumstances and IVF provided that for us.
I hope this helps!
1 miscarriage 2002 (nat)
1 ectopic pregnancy 2006 (nat)
1st IVF 10/08-BFP twins/misc-6 1/2 wks & stillbirth 21 wks
2nd FET 6/09-BFN
3rd IVF 2010-April-BFP - DD born 12/7/10
Lost Ashley Nicole Thomas at 21 weeks
- Posts: 520
- Joined: Wed Oct 22, 2008 2:27 pm
Well the reason we turned to IVF was because I was getting old and we already had children of our own. So we tried IVF with a Donor Egg to minimize the possibilities of genetic desorder but that cycle failed. Then we were waiting for our clinic to open their Embryo Adoption Program which took a full year so in the mean time we tried clomid and we got pg but did get a Trisomy 21 little boy... So the next time around we were NOT using my old eggs anymore. So we finally got embryos from our clinic and we used half of the embryos we got and are actually pregnant with one bean and this baby is ok genetically good thing.
DH – 41 Me - 45
11/15/09 - 6 Frosties left
03/10/10 - Acupuncture - FET - Transfered 5
03/22/10 - BETA #1- 426 #2- 1071 - 04/07/10 - One Bean - Due Date 10/11/28
- Posts: 426
- Joined: Sun Aug 02, 2009 2:14 am
I have to count my blessings. I have a DD naturally conceived with a little help from clomid. Started trying for #2, 2 years after she was born and have been trying for 3 years to have another
RE all say could be a tubal factor, endo and recently found out also have a male factor ohhh and were 38 so you could probably add the age thing too. I've been pregnant 3 times without IVF, so I know my body can do it just something isn't right and IVF can fix that
I did get pregnant last cycle but had a miscarriage
We would like our own biological child first but I would consider adoption if we need too. The adoption process can also be pretty expensive. We did have IVF insurance coverage which is almost exhausted. Hoping this cycle works cause mentally, physically and financially I'm done
Wish me luck
ME 38 mild endo, removed left tube,2 ectopics DD born 2005 :)
DH Low Morph
IUI Feb 09 BFN
IVF #1 & 2cancelled May 09 & July 09
#3 BFN Sept 09
FET Nov 09 Chem Pregnancy
IVF #4 BFP June 10 Beta # 324, Beta#2 10,078 DS born 3/1/11
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 2518
- Joined: Sat Dec 15, 2007 12:10 am
- Location: CA, USA
My husband had chemo 10 years ago, going through IVF and ICSI was the only way we could conceive. He had a daughter naturally conceived during a bad marriage. I had no kids and always wanted to be a mom. We didn't find out chemo had ruined his counts until after we were married (wouldn't have made a difference). It was important to me (I checked out with no fertility issues) to carry my own child and also wanted a biological child that was mine and DHs. If that didn't work we would probably go for sperm donor or other options, but I felt we had to try that first. It worked and we have a gorgeous son that looks like both of us and it is a joy to see little things here and there from two people that love each other blended as one. I think women have a natural desire to carry a baby. Whether it is from donor eggs or sperm donor or donor embryos.
it is a wonderful experience and when you come to that point in life you will understand what all the fuss is about
me 39 + DH 46 low mot - chemo
#3 IVF Lost one twin at 8 wks
#2 IVF May 2010 Ectopic