How do you cope?

Discussion group for all topics related to infertility including preparation for pregnancy, causes, investigation and treatment of infertility.
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Location: Leeds - UK

How do you cope?

Post by brennang1 » Thu Feb 03, 2005 6:13 pm

Hi - First time I have come across this site and have been sat here hours reading through all the messages wishing I had found it years ago.
My hubby and I have been trying for a family for just over 5 years now and had 1 failed attempt and IVF 2 years ago. I have polycysytic ovaries and Endometriosis.
We then began another attempt but just after egg collection I developed Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome and was admitted to hospital for a few days! This meant our 6 fertilised eggs were frozen before they could grade them etc..... We were obviously upset as you will all know how stressful it is, but you carry on thinking it will all be worth it in the end. We then began the pricess of FET but as previously,things don't seem to go our way - part way through the process they discovered a large cyst on my ovary!! So I had to wait to be admitted to hospital again for the cyst to be removed!
So here we are again - Yesterday we had 2 eggs transferred! - Both very good quality (grade 2 and a grade 2.5) and both were developing very well so we are again trying to be optimistic!!
I feel like i have been on this emotional roller coaster since all this began! I just wondered how everyone else copes??
I know that FET success rates are poor but I cant help dreaming of our babies christening and how we will tell our friends we are at last pregnant!! - Sad I know but I can't help it!
Gaynor 31 DH 36
TTC 5 yrs
PCOS and Endometriosis
1 IVF failed
OHSS during 2nd attempt
FET 2nd Feb!!


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Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2005 4:21 pm


Post by StefScott » Thu Feb 03, 2005 6:27 pm

Welcome to the site...I recently found it myself, and have really found a new strength from the information and wonderful people found here!

I just wanted to say I am wishing you the best of luck on your transfer. Hang in there during the wait between now and your test. It's a nerve-racking time, but try to keep your mind occupied and take it easy with your body. And stay close to this board...there are others going through the same thing right now, and I'm sure you will get outstanding support from everyone here. Keep positive thoughts...miricles can and do happen!

I will be thinking of you and sending you positive vibes!

Stephanie :wink:
ME 36, DH 47
Vasectomy Reversal
Male Factor, Low sperm count
IVF w/ICSI Jan 05 +tive, but early m/c
1st FET April 05 BFN
2nd FET May/June05 BFN
2nd IVF Oct05 BFN
3rd FET Sept 06

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Post by DebraP » Thu Feb 03, 2005 8:25 pm

Gaynor... don't lose faith in FETs there are some very happy pg women on the other forum/side due to them. Someone who was a highly prolific poster until very recently (the lovely Tracey S) had twins from a a FET last summer. It does work. In fact, a local (public) clinic here has such high FET success rates they're seriously debating only allowing one embryo to be transferred as they have so many sets of twins from their tmts!!!!

Post your test date on the 'test date' thread and I'll add you to the list!!

Good luck with your 2ww. You should post a bit on the January buddies thread as there are others on there waiting too.

Me: 44, DH: 31
Game Over.
Dates: Aug 02 - May 06
Tries: 5 fresh + 4 frozen.
Results: 1 daughter, 2 m/c, 1 ectopic.

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Joined: Sat Jul 03, 2004 6:20 am
Location: Somewhere in CA

Post by alicia » Fri Feb 04, 2005 7:58 am


Good luck with your FET. I had one after an IVF miscarriage last summer. I was convinced it would not work, even during the 2ww. I am now pregnant with twin boys due May 7. So you just never know.

Having had OHSS must have been horrible. I'm so glad you were okay. That's one nice thing about FET, is you don't have to worry about that. Mine was a natural FET with no medications except Progesterone. It was definately easier than the IVF, though emotionally it is always hard.

This board has been a godsend for the last year. I don't know how I could have gone through it all without the wonderful strong women on here.

Good luck to you,

TTC 2.5 years - Me 38 no tubes; DH 32
1st- IVF June 2004 - early MC
2nd - FET Aug 2004 - Twin boys born April 25, 2005!!!

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Post by Sand » Fri Feb 04, 2005 5:50 pm

Hi Gaynor ....From what I understand, once the embi has actually survived the thaw, it has just the same chance of sucess as a fresh embi. It's the thawing process that's the difficult part ...

Good luck !! :D

Sandra x
Me 41 yrs old - dh 49 yrs old. ttc 110 yrs.
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11

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Location: Thatcham, Berkshire, UK

Post by Sarah30 » Sat Feb 05, 2005 8:20 pm

hello and welcome

I haven't posted on here for aaaaaaaaages, but just skimmed through today and found your post.

I just wanted to tell you that FET can be successful - it was for us. We're now the proud parents of twins Lucy & Matthew born 23/12/03 7½ & 6½lb.

It was our 3rd IVF attempt. First was a fresh transfer which failed (after they found I have polyps in the womb so had them removed). Second attempt was FET I got pregnant and miscarried at 12 weeks (nothing to do with the treatment was a chromosone disorder in the baby (has D&C and they tested the baby)). Third attempt also FET and got pregnant with our two beautiful babies.

Just really wanted to say, don't give up hope and don't get a downer about FET, there's no reason why it can't work for you too. Stay positive and just take each hurdle as it comes, don't dwell on the negative, look forward to the positive. That's how we got through it all. We also were trying for 5 years in total, it was a long slog, but sooooo worth it.

My advise would be as i said, take each thing as it comes, deal with it, don't dwell on it, look forward to the future and each new opportunity, be there for each other and your time will come.

Love Sarah x

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Post by mindyvic » Sun Feb 06, 2005 9:52 am

Hi Gaynor,
I'm a newbie to this site also. I somtimes feel like I've just about exhausted all my chances of TTC but at 44 I'm still trying to keep positive and on the lookout for new options. I had 4 failed IVF last year, the 1st as I'm sure most you found the most devastating of them all. I'm now exploring acupuncture and have been given very good chances of success. We all cope in different ways and I'm sure this forum has helped many women cope. Take one day at a time, never give up hope, stay positive, we've heard them all... have a little cry, pick your chin up but do whatever works for you, wishing you best of luck and positive thoughts. :D

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Post by ogr1 » Mon Feb 07, 2005 8:23 am

hello, and i am glad that you found this place to..
it is a wonderful that we can all help eachother.

i have found some wonderful friends....
we werent blessed with our babies to raise here but we our blessed with our grandaughter
and all of our many adopted and foster children that touch our lives
and i am glad to add that our 6th grandchild will be born this spring!!!!

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Joined: Thu Sep 16, 2004 3:13 pm
Location: liverpool

Post by julesg » Mon Feb 07, 2005 10:10 am


Hi - just wanted to say good luck and I hope that things work out for you - this site really is a god send - there are so many amazing women on here. :D

Love and hugs
Me 32 DH 37 ttc 2years
Male Factor
First ICSI October 04 - cycle abandoned high risk of OHSS
ICSI April/May 05 -ve
ICSI Sep/Oct 05 +ve result 12th October
DD born June 2006
ICSI Oct/Nov08 -ve

Posts: 151
Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 3:58 pm
Location: Yorkshire

Post by JaneR » Mon Feb 07, 2005 8:59 pm

Hi Gaynor,

How was your first day back at work? Hope you took it easy. i go back tomorrow and don't really want to, I've got used to taking it easy.

I'm now at that stage where I'm checking every little sympton, stomach pains slightly sore boobs oh and I didn't like the taste of my tea this morning. None of these probably mean anything but I go from being excited to being very depressed thinking AF is coming.

How are you coping? your only a day behind me.

Anyway take care.



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Location: Leeds - UK

Post by brennang1 » Tue Feb 08, 2005 5:42 pm

Hi Jane - Nice to hear from you!

Feeling much the same as you! - I was very depressed yesterday as not only back at work with everyone asking if I had a nice weekend (only my boss knows!!) but also feeling very tearful and sore boobs!! (and ppains which worry me!!!)

I find myself biting my hubby's head off then crying as I am being so horrid! - I am lucky he is so understanding and supportive!!!

Feel's like countdown to D Day now with it being less than a week to next Monday!! Hope you are ok and work not too bad for you!

Fingers crossed we both get the result we want!!

Take care

Love Gaynor x
Gaynor 31 DH 36
TTC 5 yrs
PCOS and Endometriosis
1 IVF failed
OHSS during 2nd attempt
FET 2nd Feb!!

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Post by nicolamark » Tue Feb 08, 2005 5:46 pm

Welcome to this site, I have made so many friends here, people to meet and share the same emotions you go through. It's been great in helping me and fantastic to get real advice.
Good luck with it.
x x :D
IUI using donor in 2005
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011

Posts: 49
Joined: Tue Feb 08, 2005 1:21 am

Good Luck

Post by joy » Tue Feb 08, 2005 6:56 pm

I wanted to tell you good luck with everything. It is very, very stressful and hard I know. But, be positive. That is very, very important! I hope everything works out.

Joy :lol:

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