Embryos died before ET

Discussion group for all topics related to infertility including preparation for pregnancy, causes, investigation and treatment of infertility.
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Embryos died before ET

Post by Macca8 » Thu Feb 16, 2006 11:35 am

Hi all,

Just to let you know that my embryos died last night. They called my mobile this morning as I was about 10 mins away. I knew this would happen as I only had two.

We both feel so deflated. Not sure if I will ever cycle again. Don't really see the point if this is going to keep happening. I was obviously notmeant to be a mum.

Me 37, DH 51
Twin Boys - Sean Alexander & Samuel Robert


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Post by bella-s » Thu Feb 16, 2006 11:43 am

Macca - I'm so sorry. You must feel terrible & so disappointed. Please take it easy & give yourself time to grieve. I know it's too early, but don't give up. It's never easy, but it will happen one day, I know it will.

#1 -ve severe OHSS
#2&3 FET both -ve
#4 1 blasto - BFP! Lucy Bella born 3rd Dec 06
Jan 09 - FET...BFP!


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Post by Eminde » Thu Feb 16, 2006 11:45 am

Oh Lisa, how terrible. I can't begin to imagine your disappointment. Please look after yourself and give yourselves time to get over this. And in time, maybe the motivation will come back for you to have a another try.

Hugs to you.
Eminde xx
Me 32, DH 43, TTC 3+ years
3 failed IUIs: 2005
IVF Nov 05: cancelled
IVF Feb 06: -ve
FET Mar 06: +ve!!!!

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Post by donna99 » Thu Feb 16, 2006 12:03 pm

hi lisa,

im so so sorry to hear your sad news i can truly relate to this....i am sure that you are both totally heart broken at the moment....

please please please do not give up, dont want to patronise you but you are still young and like me have been thru so much on your IVF journey so youll too know that only time is a healer, so please Lisa dont give up try again only if you can when you are strong enough...

lol Donna99 xxxxx
Me31 minor endo,DH34,TTC 4.5yrs,
2 -tive iui's, 4 -tive IVFs & 3 cancelled cycles & 1 natural miscarriage.
#5th IVF May'06.BFP .Baby boy born 3/2/07.then nat preg little brother 4 first born, baby boy born 10/3/08!!!!!! WOW! & NOW VERY BUSY!!!

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Post by Cla » Thu Feb 16, 2006 12:41 pm

Oh Lisa - I wanted to cry when I read your post. I'm so sorry.
It's easy to make snap decisions when we're hurting but please take some time out to focus on you before thinking about the future.
Sending hugs.

Me: 35 DP : 38
1st time IVF - Aug/Sept 05 -ve
FET - Jan 06 - BFP!!!

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Post by vmb2006 » Thu Feb 16, 2006 1:00 pm


I am so sorry to hear your news. Please do not take hasty decisions. Try to B positive( I know that its difficult at the moment) but give your self some time. You never know, things change!

I wish you all the best!

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Post by Claire » Thu Feb 16, 2006 1:07 pm

Oh Lisa, I was so sad when I read your post.
You've really been through the mill over recent years and it's no wonder you feel so upset with it all.
But like someone else said don't make any rash decisions right now. Give yourself time to get over this setback before thinking about anything else. Life has a habit of being against you all the time... but your turn will come, don't give up hope.

love claire x
First IVF cycle Feb 05, 7 frosties waiting.
1st FET Aug 05 -ive
2nd FET Oct 05 +ive sadly ended in m/c at 7wks
3rd FET May 06 -ive
4th FET Nov 06 +ive praying hard every day x
I'm 33 and DH is 35 ttc for 11 years

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Post by Macca8 » Thu Feb 16, 2006 1:23 pm


Thank you so much for your kind words. I hope I do find the strength to go again. I think I will change clinics as the one I've been to hasn't been great. My clinic have not offered any tests and were not happy when I wanted to cancel this last treatment as I felt the follicle numbers were too low. Obviously I followed their advice and look where it got me in the end.

I read today on the Care IVF website about immunlogical disorders. There are certain indications for immune testing. 1) Women over the age of 35, yes thats me 2) Those that have had 3 miscarriages or failed IVF, me again 3) One Blighted Ovum pregnancy, again that was my first miscarriage at 14 weeks some 10 years ago. I know that this was not my problem this time round but It was on my previous 2 IVF cycles. Both times getting pregnant and then losing the pregnancies.

I think I will at least get tested for these and then see what the future holds. My DH wants us to go again as we still have two straws of his sperm frozen.

If anyway has any pro's/con's to Care IVF, can you let me know.

thanks everyone
Me 37, DH 51
Twin Boys - Sean Alexander & Samuel Robert

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Post by ESTHER » Thu Feb 16, 2006 1:49 pm


Iam so sorry to hear your sad news. Please take time to grieve for your embies but never give up as it is the right attitude for this rollercoaster. I am glad you have already found the motivation to try again. Changing clinics sounds like a great idea especially if the last one didnt do a proper investigation.

Remember we are all here to cheer you on till the end if you need us.

ttc 6,5year
1st ivf..20/06/05..positive

Baby girl Paris Ruvarashe Born on the 10th of March 2006.

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Post by Sand » Thu Feb 16, 2006 2:10 pm

Oh Lisa .. I'm so sorry to read your news. I know I was optimistic yesterday when you were worried about only 2 embryos surviving so far, but you've got to be every step of the way otherwise you'll go mad.

I've just cycled with Care. I asked loads of questions at the consultation - all about immunology testing, assisted hatching - and was as good as laughed at. Told that I shouldn't be thinking that way, that everything pointed to the sperm, and that we should give it another normal ICSI go. Which we did. Which didn't work. You're different I suppose in that you've had miscarriages and so hopefully your wishes will be considered more seriously.

Last Autumn there was an 8 week waiting list from GP referral to Consulation. So, if you decide you might want to go to them it's worth getting your GP to send that referral letter off for you, even if you're nowhere near ready to cycle again. You'll need to do Welfare of the Child again, plus all the initial bloods (HIV, Prolactin etc) unless you can get copies of the results from your last hospital.

I know it's way to soon to know what you are going to do, but remember that in a few weeks time you'll feel stronger about the whole situation.

Take care

Sandra x
Me 41 yrs old - dh 49 yrs old. ttc 110 yrs.
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11

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Post by chellejaya » Thu Feb 16, 2006 2:47 pm

Macca I can't really add any extra advise to what has already been said, but please listen to these ladies and don't give up. You will get there in the end.
I am thinking of you

Chellejaya xxx
Me 32 DH 32
TTC 4 years in total
Ruptured ectopic Dec 2003 - Lost tube and ovary
1st IVF - Jan 06 +ive with twins (Girl & Boy)


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Post by DebraP » Thu Feb 16, 2006 2:54 pm

Macca, the shock of a failed thaw is a brutal one. Give yourselves plenty of time to recover. I found it hit me after a while vs. immediately.

Be good to yourselves and don't force a decision just yet although Sandra's advice about getting the referring underway, just in case, is good.

take care
Me: 44, DH: 31
Game Over.
Dates: Aug 02 - May 06
Tries: 5 fresh + 4 frozen.
Results: 1 daughter, 2 m/c, 1 ectopic.

Posts: 297
Joined: Thu Jan 19, 2006 8:37 pm

Post by langton » Thu Feb 16, 2006 3:12 pm

you poor thing,

ivf is one hell of a roller coaster ride. im so sorry about yor embreo's. i no it is so easy for everone to say dont give up., cause you really do feel like that sometimes. this cycle has given me so many up's and downs it reall hasnt been smooth sailing and it has made me learn anything can happen last minute. first i was so pleased i had 28 follices and went hypo. then i went for scans and they wouldn't grow. nurses told me they might have to cancel my treatment. that put me on a low all these injections bloods, scans for nothing. then last minute they decided to grow. so i got to hcg injection. i was over the moon. then................... they told me that day they had made a mistake my hormone level was too high so no hcg. couldn't belive it! they said if it didnt go down by the next day treatment would be deffinatly canceld this time. i was devistated and new i was gonna have to deal with it. no ivf for me. i was so depressed and low i said thats it!!!!! i am not going through this again for anything, to be let down last minute atfer three years of hard work and determination.

luckilly the next day it had gone down. i had my hcg last night and go for egg collection tomorrow. they have told me they might have to freeze all my embreo's and have ET when my body has calmed down. which will probably be three months. all as i am saying is really dont give up. dont let it beat you. keep fighting till the end untill you get what youve been waiting for. my nanna always says good things come to those who wait.
it just wasn't ment to be this time. i no i shouldn't say it but i dont think its ment to be for me this time either. i wont give up.
if you need a friend we are all here for you!!!!

all my love


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Post by I-1-2-b-a-mum » Thu Feb 16, 2006 4:34 pm

Lisa sweetie, I'm so sorry to hear your news. Wishing you and your hubby all the best ((((((hugs))))))

Fingers crossed
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Post by Fingers crossed » Thu Feb 16, 2006 5:25 pm

I am so sad for you and your hubby. It is so hard when the embryos don't make it - next time they will. My clinic said that each cycle can be so different and the numbers and embryo quality can really vary even a few months apart. I didn't know this and it made me feel a little better so I hope that it helps you a little bit.

Take some time out and free your minds of big decisions yet and allow yourselves to feel the pain and work through it.

warm wishes
4 X ICSI - 2 X BFN 2 X BIO CHEMICAL 2001-2006



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