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Having to come to terms with I won't conceive naturally :-(

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Having to come to terms with I won't conceive naturally :-(

Postby Kellyj04 » Mon Feb 04, 2013 10:54 am

All hi
Not sure what to actually say or what I want all I no is I'm 31yr old after confirmation last Sunday that was losing my 4th preg to ectopic preg which meant I had to have my last tube removed because of the damage :-( not only do I not have any tubes now I also have to face that my body will never conceive on its own ever again I don't feel like a woman anymore! :-(
On the good note I have been put in for Ivf ASAP but with my local hosp only offer 1 free chance of ivf! It's a joke!
The hosp won't see me for a month to discuss things further but my heads as mess need to know info,
How quickly can you be seen? Is there a good chance of ivf with no tubes? How do you ladies cope?
So hard when your friends have what you want now :-(

Kelly xxxx
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Joined: Mon Feb 04, 2013 10:42 am

Re: Having to come to terms with I won't conceive naturally

Postby leorira11 » Mon Feb 04, 2013 2:13 pm

Kelly- Were your other pregnancies also ectopic? In a way, ectopic pregnancies aren't as bad for your prognosis as "regular" miscarriages - ectopic means the baby was likely healthy, just in the wrong place, instead of miscarriages when the embryo wasn't healthy to begin with.

IVF with no tubes has great odds -- IVF was originally developed for women with no/damaged tubes.

I'm sorry you only have 1 free try at your hospital.

Starting took a long time. Even after a first consultation, they are going to want a TON of testing done - and it takes a while. From my diagnosis taht we needed IVF until my first cycle was 6 months (and that was considered fast).

I'm sorry you are dealing with all this. Join our cycle buddies chat thread and hang out. All of us here know what facing that news is like.
8 IVF+6 FET=6 BFN+8 BFP =

-b/g twins 22w (12.09)
-mc 10w (9.10)
-Micha (7.19-24.11) & Asaf (7.19-28.11) born at 24w
-mc 5wk (2.12)
-no HB at 18w (10.12)
-BO (4.13)-
-mc 6wk (9.13)

last attempt - donor sperm - baby girl born healthy July 2014
Valued Contributor
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Joined: Fri Mar 19, 2010 12:09 pm
Location: Jerusalem, Israel

Re: Having to come to terms with I won't conceive naturally

Postby Sunshine1576 » Mon Feb 04, 2013 11:09 pm

Hi Kelly,
I am so sorry to hear about your RPL and tubual loss, but I'm glad you found us here. Personally, it took me forever to accept I would not be conceiving naturally and I have both tubes, sometimes in the fertility world there are unknown reasons especially when you've been through all the test and everything comes back okay. It leaves the RE scratching their head thinking they just knew there has to be something wrong but then they cannot find anything internally wrong, what the crap? Then they look at dh's sperm and yes 4 million is not the highest count but the probability is with IVF they can use ICSI to pierce the egg and plant the best swimmer. It's all proflexing really bc even after two attempts they are still wondering what went wrong? I'm not trying to discourage anyone from trying IVF, I am simply saying in most cases when there is tubual structual damage or the tubes have been removed, that patient is the best candidate for IVF. Sometimes it may take more then one attempt but the best advice I would give anybody is take a deep breathe do your research on the clinic and look at all your options with a reputable RE. After my first IVF in 2010, it did cost me my life savings I tried a few IUIs and then took a break, last May we found a clinic that offers IVF ATTAIN. I'll post the link for you to read up on the program...in a nutshell the loan could be financed through Springstone Patient Financing. The way it works is after 6 tries AND no baby is brought home you receive 70% of your money back and this contract is good until 38th birthday, so it's definately something worth looking into www.attain.com. P.S. Certainly join us over on the other thread Leora was talking about, it will be worthwhile I promise. X Christy
Married 13 yrs
36, unexplained
1 natural pg- m/c at 7 wks
(2010-2012) 4 IUIs, 2 IVFs
FET cycle 2/25/2013
Beta: 95, 390, 1361
3/27 HR 140
4/10 HR 184
4/17 Released from RE
6/21 Found out we are having a BOY!
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Location: Florida

Re: Having to come to terms with I won't conceive naturally

Postby teresajj1 » Tue Feb 05, 2013 1:34 am

Hi Kelly,

I am new on here and read your post. I'm sorry about your news. Luckily you don't need your tubes in order to have IVF so there is still a chance for you, and a good one at that. I am 33 and been married for 7 years never getting pregnant once and being told we have unexplained infertility. We will be doing our first IVF cycle in April which I'm really nervous about. All these questions like, "what if we spend the $ and it doesn't work", "how is our life going to be if we are unsuccessful"? I hope you can find comfort knowing that there is still a good chance you can have a child of your own. :)

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Joined: Sat Jan 19, 2013 2:05 am

Re: Having to come to terms with I won't conceive naturally

Postby Lacey801 » Thu Feb 28, 2013 3:11 am

Hi Kelly,
I to had to have my tubes removed and I feel exactly like you. I can never get pregnant naturally and I don't feel like a women. We live in Utah and of all places baby state, we have to pay for all of our fertility treatments!!! :x I hate hearing "just relax" or "it will happen, I know it" or " I know exactly how you feel" I want to punch some of these people in the face. I am glad there are places like this, because I think I know how you feel, and I felt better reading your post. We just did our first stimulation, with no response :cry: I hoping next month will be better. Hang in there! :)
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