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multiple miscarriages

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multiple miscarriages

Postby Estellla » Mon Dec 04, 2017 11:03 pm

I came here to find help and support. It happened so that I can’t carry a baby. I had 6 MCs. I don’t think I will be able to cope with another one. It’s so hard and so unbearable! I feel miserable and I feel ashamed in front of my husband. I lost 6 children… I hate myself for this. I don’t understand why me? What have I done to suffer like this? All of my friends have families. They have kids, they have everything! And here I am who can’t even carry my own child. Of course I’m happy for them! Sometimes they ask me to stay with their kids, when they have work or some other staff. I love to play with them, read fairytales and buy toys for them. I feel so happy at that moment! I imagine how it would be if my children were alive, with us… Doctors said they don’t know the reason and advised us to try ART. I don’t want to waste time any more. It’s hard to live like this, tearing myself with guilt. Now I’m looking into surrogacy. But I’m so scared. I receive support from my husband. He thinks that surrogacy is a very good option for us. But both mine and his parents think that surrogacy is wrong and unnatural. I read here, how girls are grateful to their families. I have completely different situation. My parents blame me all the time. They think I do something wrong and that’s why I lost my children. My mother told me, that all women in our family have an amazing health and no one ever had problems with carrying their children. I tried to explain them that it’s not true. They never listen and we argue all the time. My husband is the only one who supports me. I just really hope that everything will change! I hope surrogacy will give us chance to be happy. Any advice? What should we consider? Where to start our search?
Estellla
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