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Heartbeat!

Announcement of pregnancy and birth following assisted reproductive treatment.

Postby Sara30 » Thu Dec 11, 2008 9:41 pm

lilmd

Thanks for your reply, they said the sac was measuring as 5 weeks 6 days, not 6 weeks 6 days which it should have been so it is measuring smaller than it should be, but it was perfect which is why I have to go back next week. They don't measure our beta levels at the clinc but I might ask for one next week if there is still no heartbeat. When are you due to go back? This week is worse than the 2ww as everything was so positive and happy because we were pregnant and then you hear the news no heartbeat. Sometimes I don't think doctors have any idea what we go through and make such insensitive comments like yours made to you, that can make your heart break. Why do they have to do that?

I will be thinking of you come on little embies beat beat beat!!

Lee x
Finally I am a mummy, we are about to adopt our beautiful little girl xxxxx
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Postby sonu911 » Fri Dec 12, 2008 2:30 pm

Dear Lee

Try not to panic. I know its easier said than done. I saw the first heartbeat in my 8th week. As lonng as you feel pregnant and great, everything is fine.
Pl don't forget to update.

Hugs...
Me,DH-35
3 ICSIs-BFN
FET-BFP/mc@7wks
4#ICSI-BFP
Anay came on 17th FEB, 2009
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Postby lilmd » Fri Dec 12, 2008 2:31 pm

Sara,

Unfortunately I think the lose sight of the fact that we are people and this is their "job". I don't think they really realize that we go home and stress out until the next appt. I think the beta level confirms that the HCG is where it should be when they don't have enough info. from the U/S. I go back on Tuesday.. I might try to make it Monday though. I think the main thing we can control right now is our outlook.. let's stay positive!!!
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Postby Sara30 » Mon Dec 15, 2008 7:26 pm

Hi Sonu

Thankyou for your positive message, yes I do still feel pregnant, sore boobs, nausea, no sign of any bleeding and very positive poas tests, not sure if you would still feel all the symptoms if our little one died 2 weeks ago? We are back at the clinic tommorrow for another scan so we will know more then. I am keeping positive for now.

lilmd how are you doing? did you manage to get a scan today or do you have to wait until tommorrow? Hope all is well with you.

Take Care
Lee xx
Finally I am a mummy, we are about to adopt our beautiful little girl xxxxx
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Postby lilmd » Mon Dec 15, 2008 9:02 pm

Sara,

I am going tomorrow. I had an early meeting and I didn't want to stress to get to the doctor and get to my meeting on time. I am going tomorrow. I really think all is well right now. I also think things are good for you. I have heard that it is VERY usually to lose a pregnancy and not miscarry right away. Let me know how you do... we are on the same schedule right now. I just had a bunch of labs drawn for my regular OB/GYN appt which is Friday. I made sure I got an appt ASAP because I am thinking about getting the CVS done and with the holidays I want to make sure I can get in as soon as it is available.
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Postby lilmd » Tue Dec 16, 2008 5:09 pm

I need feedback!!!! I went in this morning for my 2nd ultrasound.. and my doctor didn't see a heartbeat. He sent me over to the radiology lab to get a more detailed u/s and said those machines are much better... well they saw no heartbeat and said the fetal pole is measuring at around 6 weeks vs 7 weeks. Although my doctor (1st appt today) did tell me that it had grown from last week and my beta last week was also good. They sent me down for more b/w so I am waitig to hear about that. My doctor said it could go either way... and that each day can bring major changes. I have not been spotting at all.. I am still bloated and my boobs are still swollen..
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Postby Sara30 » Tue Dec 16, 2008 9:09 pm

Hi lilmd

Please try and keep positive, if your little one has grown from last week then it has to be good news, Sonu said they did not see her babys heartbeat until week 8. Try posting a new topic on here see if anyone can give you some help and advice not everyone might read this one as it has been going for a while.

We also went back today and I have had a missed miscarriage which means that the pregnancy sac is still functioning but the baby has died. She (I feel she was a she) died around week six and she had not grown since then so your situation is very different to mine.

Please keep us updated I really want to read good news on here.
My thoughts and prayers are with you

Lee xx
Finally I am a mummy, we are about to adopt our beautiful little girl xxxxx
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Postby lilmd » Tue Dec 16, 2008 9:31 pm

I am really sorry. I truly know how devasted you are! I really feel that I am stuck in the middle. I am really not sure. The 2nd u/s today, the radiologist said that the fetal pole was measuring 4 mm which is equal to 6 weeks.. not 7 weeks... so it could be that the baby stopped growing at 6 weeks. I said but I got an HCG test last week and it looked good. I got the HCG back from today and it was 24,000. My doctor said that sounded good that just a few days can make a big difference. I am going back Friday. If the sac was still functioning, does that mean that your HCG was also increasing?
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Postby Sara30 » Wed Dec 17, 2008 3:16 pm

Hi lilmd

Thankyou, and I truly know how stuck in the middle you feel and the agony you are going through not knowing one way or another.

I did not have my hcg measured they don't do it at the clinic I attend. The consultant scanned me yesterday and it was definately no bigger from the week before. However we asked if there was any point in doing a blood test and he said no as my levels would be high as the pregnancy sac was still intact so would be producing the hormnes still which is why I was having positive poas tests and still having pregnancy symptoms. I don't know if my hcg level would still be rising because the sac was still intact or not, sorry I can't give you an answer.

All I can say is my little one did not grow and yours has during the week, they must still feel there is a chance that things will be ok because yesterday they said to me that there was no hope and I chose today to go into hospital and have my little one (sorry I cant say 'it') taken away as I could not bear the thought of waiting up to another 4 or 5 weeks for the miscarriage to happen naturally.

They are seeing you again on friday please try and stay calm and positive I know easier said than done! Also sometimes the babies measure a bit behind the dates they should be and catch up later.

I am really thinking of you and sending you lots of positive energy as I know exactly how you are feeling. Were you able to get any answers from anyone else here? I havent checked the rest of the board out yet I came straight here to see how you were doing.

Take care
Lee xx
Finally I am a mummy, we are about to adopt our beautiful little girl xxxxx
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Postby washingtonda » Wed Dec 17, 2008 6:32 pm

I just had a baby through IVF this past March so I alway return to the board to check on old friends and just give advise where I can.

Lilmd -- I know that Friday is only two days away but if I were you, I would make a visit to the local Hospital Emergency room. I would make up some excuse on why I am there. I would tell them that I am pregnant and just don't feel well and let them run these test. I'm not sure how costly this may be for you but if you have health insurance than this is probably not a bad idea for piece of mind. I wouldn't be able to sleep if that were me.

Good luck to all of you amazing ladies.
Me, 40 - DH, 47
IVF #1: POSITIVE - Michaela born 9/19/08
IVF #2: Consult on 10/13/09 - Start BCP Dec since clinic will be closed for the Holiday.
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Postby lilmd » Wed Dec 17, 2008 7:21 pm

washingtonda,

Thanks so much for the advice. Trust me, the first cramp or drop of blood I am in the ER! Basically it just seems like the end of the road for me. Even though my doctor said it had grown from last week... the heartbeat is the most important thing and if it isn't there it could just mean that the little one may have stopped developing within the last few days. To compound the issue my husbands ex just had a baby on Monday... her 4th by the 3rd father and has custody of none of them!!! What a slap in the face..
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Postby lilmd » Thu Dec 18, 2008 2:30 pm

Sara,

You post made me tear up. I am so sorry.. Are you having a lot of pain? The only thing I can think about is how am I going to get through the holidays... I know you are feeling the same way. Not that there is ever a good time for something like this to happen but this sure is a bad time.

The thing is that my RE didn't really take measurements so I am not fully comfortable with him saying that it had grown since last week. I only have 1 more day left... but I have a feeling that this can't be good news. I know I should try to be positive but I just don't feel like there is any hope for me.

I did read something today that said if the embryo is less than 5 mm you may not be able to see a heartbeat. Based on my measurements I know it was only 4mm but that then leads me to believe something has gone wrong because it stopped growing. I also tried to find out if the HCG levels would continue to double even if the embryo stopped growing and I couldn't find an answer. There is so much information out there but yet much of it is conflicted or confusing.

I am thinking about you alot. I really appreciate you returning to the board and supporting me even though you are going through such a tough time. I am very sorry...
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Postby sonu911 » Thu Dec 18, 2008 2:52 pm

Dear Lee

I am so sorry!! I know how devastating it can be, I also lost my first precious one in 7 weeks. Having said that will not ease your pain. But the greatest joy here is that you were able to concieve and got a BFP which brightens your chances for the next time.

My prayers are with you and pl. stay strong.

Hugs.
Me,DH-35
3 ICSIs-BFN
FET-BFP/mc@7wks
4#ICSI-BFP
Anay came on 17th FEB, 2009
Image
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Postby Sara30 » Thu Dec 18, 2008 6:28 pm

Hi lilmd

I know holidays round the corner, not feeling fully festive at the moment but also I am not going to let this IVF journey beat me, I came to term with a lot of things last year, to cut along story short (I put a post on the general forum board titled There is hope, and it explains our situation), I really believe what will be will be, we have 4 embryos still frozen and we have an appt in January to try again. I have to be positive and as Sonu said in her post (thankyou sonu) the fact I got pregnant must mean we have a better chance next time.

I am really hoping you get the answer you want tommorrow and my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Lee xx
Finally I am a mummy, we are about to adopt our beautiful little girl xxxxx
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Postby lilmd » Tue Dec 23, 2008 2:25 pm

Sorry it has taken me so long to post. Friday was a huge roller coaster. I had blood drawn on Monday anticipating that I would be released to my regular OB/GYN last week. Then on Tuesday I went to my RE for U/S which turned in to 2 U/S and B/W because they could find the heartbeat (7W 2D). I convinced my RE not to make me wait for another week and let me come back on Friday. Friday morning I contacted my regular OB/GYN to see what my HCG levels were on Monday because I wanted to see if they we just beginning to decline. As I thought the HCG was 25,800 on Monday and about 24,800 on Tuesday. I called my RE and they said they didn't really want to compare them because they were different labs. So I immediately went to their lab to have my HCG. In my mind I was only looking for confirmation of the worst. My RE wasn't available for an US so I went home and waited for the call about my HCG. They had the BW ran STAT so I didn't have to wait to long and it came back a little lower then Tuesday (like 24,600 I think). My RE wanted me back at 3 for another U/S. While I am on the way to the U/S the surgical center calls me to schedule my D & C for Monday. I sort of was expecting this but not in this order. I expected to go talk to my RE and them have him tell me my options vs. the hospital calling me telling me when to be there on Monday... This is insane! So when I go in for the U/S low and behold my RE sees a strong heartbeat.. and says everything looks great! He said he wasn't as concerned about the HCG with the fact that he saw a good heartrate and the B/W may have been wrong because it was run so quick! I was in absolute shock. He told me to come back on Tuesday for another U/S and B/W. I could not believe that this was happening. He apologized for the confusion with the D&C and just wanted in scheduled just in case with the holidays coming up. I realize that each appointment truly is another hurdle. I don't know if I will ever stop worrying.

I went back this morning and I haven't got the B/W results yet but the RE had a hard time this morning and said the heartbeat was slow! He didn't seem to be able to do an actual count that I could tell. He said again that it could go either way. I have no idea what to think at this point.... it is torture not knowing.
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