Well i started to spot this morning - not much, but its there when i wipe. I was holding onto the hope that maybe, just maybe this wee one was a slow starter an that if we went back for our scan next Monday - it wud still be there, grown an with a healthy HB ..... sadley thats not goiing to happen
This 3rd IVF was so different from the other 2 - we were so mch more positive, an the outcome was out of this world. We couldnt belive that it had worked an was so happy .... it was given to us in one had and snatched out of the other ... i wish i hadnt gotten pg, wish at the end of my 2ww it was a negative .... a negative is so much easer to deal with.
It was our last go ... no more chances left, no more funds - im 41 in Aug ... too old, too tired ... too hurt to go thru this again.
At 12pm tonight - no good seeing the new year in saying 'this is our year' cos its not going to be ..... its never going to be our year no more, an that hurts more than anything, not being able to try again...
DH cried in my arms like a baby this morning when i told him i was spotting, he cried like a baby cos i wa losing his baby an there was nothng any of us can do about it ... why is life so cruel .... to see the man u married, the strong loving supportive man cry in my arms cos his only child is being taken away from us ....... how do we go on after all that