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When does the "wonderful" begin? (just whining)

Announcement of pregnancy and birth following assisted reproductive treatment.

Postby lynniecat » Sun Jan 11, 2009 8:09 pm

I worry non-stop and I am totally with u on straining till I get a tiny poop out and feel like fainting. Some suggested peanut butter for constipation. Am not a peanut butter fan, but will try it!

Oh and every time I relax, something happens, bad menstrual cramps or spotting!
Me: 44 severely reduced reserve
DH: 44 perfect
IVF 1: Feb 08 -BFP twins (lost one at 7 weeks, one at 13 weeks) :-(
IVF 2: June 08 -BFN :-(
IVF 3: September 08 -BFN :-(
IVF 4: November 08 - Katherine Emma born 8/9/2009 :D
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Postby riogirl71 » Tue Jan 13, 2009 5:51 pm

try Activia yogurt for constipation when preggers - saved my life!
me 39 + DH 46 low mot - chemo
#3 IVF Lost one twin at 8 wks
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the trap of joy

Postby Literatriz » Thu Jan 22, 2009 10:50 pm

I have really enjoyed the "venting" thread and the responses it brought in. I come from a different country and from a different time. I come from a place where poverty kills 200 babies in each 1000 before they reach one year of age. And I do read about less than a century ago, when half women would die giving birth. The Joy of motherhood is an invention of modern markets: with a few acessories, you will feel wonderful even when they are stitching your perineal area, right? Give me a break.
Being pregnant, even more after trying to get pregnant, is a treacherous dive into womanhood. You get the magical and the horrifying, the pain and the miracle, the ordinary and the precious - all at once at times. It means NOT to be in control. The vomit climbs up, the gas passes down, the belly hurts when one tries to move as fast as before...sex is umpredictable and sometimes rare.

And our babies are still promises of life, free from abnormalities. They, too, will bring their dosage of worries and annoyances - try consoling a colicky 3-months old from his agony at 11 p.m. Try for a second think about holding a cleft palate or a Down syndrome baby. Books and magazines selling the joyful motherhood are setting us up for disappointment and a perverse sense of inadequacy if something goes wrong.

No, motherhood is not about joy. It is about courage, endurance and love. Joy may come around at times. Buy joy only doesn't make us complete mothers - maybe joyful babysitters or young aunts. Not mothers. And we wanted to be mothers, didn't we?
We may have a happy ending but first one must endure the way there.
In solidarity with all struggling mom-to-be,
Literatriz
me 50, dh 54
2 BFN after IVF in Brazil
1 BFP after IVF in Brazil (Clinic Origen, thanks!)

Three little girls born February 27th!!!
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Postby BIGREDIOWAN » Sun Jan 25, 2009 3:22 am

While I can't relate with you girls, I'm a guy, my wife isn't having a joyous pregnancy right now. She is sick all the time, not vomiting just sick at her stomach, she can't eat very well right now, and she's tired all the time. She's also complaining about her boobs hurting to the point that I have to hug her a certain way. While she is in fact happy about this whole thing she is also very worried as well. Her and I both aren't trying to get our hopes up too much until we get out of the 1st trimester, 3 more weeks. She is also tired as hell with the progesterone shots, her butt and hips are killing her after months of shots. She knows it will be worth it in the end, but no one around us can relate with our story as they all have had natural births. I love it when those people tried to give us advice on how to have sex and what to do. I told them no offense, but you don't have a clue what you're talking about! :lol:
Destiny is not a matter of chance, it's a matter of choice.
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Postby angelaezra » Sun Jan 25, 2009 8:51 pm

Hello BIGREDIOWAN,

I have been following your story from the beginning and I have to say you are so encouraging. I have yet to see a husband as involved as you are. My husband is very supportive of me and our journey but you are amazing. I constantly see you posting and asking questions. Keep it up your great.

I will have to admit that I love being pregnant but I am so very uncomfortable and I will be very happy when I deliver. Often, I feel bad for even complaining as our journey has been 8 1/2 years long. But, I will be so glad when I can return back to myself. It is extremely hard to limit myself as I have always pushed myself to complete tasks and start new ones but my pregnancy has limited me in a major way.

I wish everyone good luck,

Angela
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1 miscarriage 2002 (nat)
1 ectopic pregnancy 2006 (nat)
1st IVF 10/08-BFP twins/misc-6 1/2 wks & stillbirth 21 wks
2nd FET 6/09-BFN
3rd IVF 2010-April-BFP - DD born 12/7/10

Lost Ashley Nicole Thomas at 21 weeks
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Postby babyloves » Sun Jan 25, 2009 11:34 pm

I'm not one to complain much, but i must say that the 3rd trimester has been the roughest yet...nasal congestion with nosebleeds, trouble rolling to the side while sleeping, round ligament pain, lower extremity swelling, and leg cramps are quite bothersome right about now...but at least i'm still active, and no major medical issues

the greatest thing is that i know that the babies (twins) are growing, kicking more - i can kinda differentiate a hand vs. a foot (maybe), and i'll have them in my arms in a few weeks (god willing)...

so, good luck to all the ladies on this board, knowing its just a matter of time until our journey's are completed..
me 33 DH 34
TTC 4 yrs
unexplained, 3 failed IUI
7/7 IVF #1
7/18 ET - 2 embies
8/1 BFP!
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Postby BIGREDIOWAN » Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:15 am

angelaezra wrote:Hello BIGREDIOWAN,

I have been following your story from the beginning and I have to say you are so encouraging. I have yet to see a husband as involved as you are. My husband is very supportive of me and our journey but you are amazing. I constantly see you posting and asking questions. Keep it up your great.

I will have to admit that I love being pregnant but I am so very uncomfortable and I will be very happy when I deliver. Often, I feel bad for even complaining as our journey has been 8 1/2 years long. But, I will be so glad when I can return back to myself. It is extremely hard to limit myself as I have always pushed myself to complete tasks and start new ones but my pregnancy has limited me in a major way.

I wish everyone good luck,

Angela


Your making me blush! :oops: Thanks for the kind words though, my wife always has people ask her questions and she says, "Ask my husband, he knows more about it than I do." :lol:
Destiny is not a matter of chance, it's a matter of choice.
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Postby BIGREDIOWAN » Wed Jan 28, 2009 2:41 am

My wife has felt horrible the past few days, the nauseau along with the pain from the shots is driving her nuts! Any advice on what I could have her do for nauseau??? She's not able to eat that much due to the nauseau and has to snack throughout the day on crackers and carrots since they are lighter type of foods and aren't hard on her stomach. I feel bad for her.........
Destiny is not a matter of chance, it's a matter of choice.
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Postby angelaezra » Wed Jan 28, 2009 11:13 am

Hello BIGREDIOWAN,

For the nausea, I used Preggie Pops. They are natural and contain no medicine. They are just like suckers and you can buy them at any maternity store or infant/kids store. I also found gingerale for pregnant women helpful. It actually has a picture of a pregnant women on the front. You can buy the gingerale at the same store. Also, tell her she is more likely to become nauseated if her stomach is empty so small frequent meals are best. I found that food with carbs helped the best like mashed potatoes and pasta, etc. This is no time to think of dieting :lol: ! I was just trying to make it out of the first trimester!

I also found these tips on the internet:

Here some foods that may help you!

Lemon - this fruit is known by its' ability to decrease the sickness feeling in minutes! Try to eat lemon when it's cold, because it's better and you will fell immediately the relief!

Apples - the same thing, also recommended cold.

Drink only non caffeinated teas. Peppermint and ginger will be excellent for you!

Here are a couple of thing you can do to avoid nausea!

Sleep well - tiredness only increases the nausea feeling in the morning and through the day. Try to sleep at least 8 hours at night and take snaps through the day!

Try to avoid closed places because of the air! Fresh air will decrease the nausea feeling so every place you go open all the windows on turn on all the fans!

Good luck,

Angela
Last edited by angelaezra on Wed Jan 28, 2009 2:56 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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1 miscarriage 2002 (nat)
1 ectopic pregnancy 2006 (nat)
1st IVF 10/08-BFP twins/misc-6 1/2 wks & stillbirth 21 wks
2nd FET 6/09-BFN
3rd IVF 2010-April-BFP - DD born 12/7/10

Lost Ashley Nicole Thomas at 21 weeks
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Postby esperanza » Wed Jan 28, 2009 1:41 pm

Ginger candy was helpful for me, I just kept a bag at home and a few in my purse...whenever I had the feeling (which it was quite often!) I just chewed one of those little candies :) you can usually find those at natural foods stores.


The other thing that was relieving was CARBS :lol: lots of it!!!! pasta, bread with cream cheese were my favs. In order to get some nutrients I would drink the odwalla juices (expensive! but at least I felt less guilty about not wanting to eat meats and much of anything else) and cream soups with veggies in it. I also ate lots of tofu and beans because I could barely stand any meet and (chicken, in particular) :twisted: AH! the pre-natal vitamins made nauseous too, so I would only take them right before going to bed.

About the shots, I actually developed an allergy towards the end (maybe the last 2 or 3 weeks) so they switch me to prometrium (progesterone pills). They enhanced some of the pregnancy symptoms, BUT my butt/hips were relieved. I was almost at the point of crying every time I had to do one of those shots, I was HAPPY to be off them. Ask your doctor/nurse practitioner, your wife might be able to make the switch. Her butt deserves a break! :lol: :lol: :lol:
me: 33 dh: 40
2 miscarriages (natural pregs. #1 Aug 2006, #2 May 2010)
IVF # 1 jan 08 BFN
FET #1 March 08 BFN
FET #2 July 08 BFP (DD born on April 2009)
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Postby BIGREDIOWAN » Wed Jan 28, 2009 7:01 pm

Okay, thanks for the info, our doctor said that she could switch to the vaginal suppositories (spl?), but she wanted to continue doing the shots. Her theory is, if it's not broken don't fix it since everything has been going well with the shots, besides the pain.
Destiny is not a matter of chance, it's a matter of choice.
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