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Postby waitingforMia » Mon Jan 21, 2008 5:47 am

Hope: Thanks for bringing up this topic. My belief in the sanctity of llife causes me a bit of worry over my embies. I am so worried I will have more than I will use. Throwing them away is not an option for me. I told the RE I wanted him to only fertilize a limited number of eggs and he looked at me as if I was from another planet. Dh doesn't really understand my concerns b/c he does not believe life starts at such an early stage. He is unsure though when it starts. I am kinda the same, but that is why I am cautious, b/c I don't know for sure and want to be a responsible caretaker for the life in my embies. Thanks for sharing that verse. Love the "unformed body" part!

How are you girls dealing with the number of embies and what to do with additional ones??
Me: 28 Dh:32
TTC 8 yrs
2/3 2 blasts transferred
2/14 BFP Beta#1: 316; Beta#2 960
2/25 - u/s one baby! :)
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Postby IndieBlue » Mon Jan 21, 2008 4:04 pm

It's been a struggle thinking about that for me too Mia. My RE's office assured me that at my age they usually only had 1-2 left to freeze if any from their past experiences...we'll see. Even then though, we only want one more pregnancy....so what to do with even 1 or 2 frozen. :(

I'm really really thought about adoption....but donating eggs and embryo's is a HUGE difference in my mind. I had no qualms about donating eggs....but a full sibling embryo just seems odd to me :(

The article last month about 2 people getting married and then finding out they were 'twins' really makes you think too. What if I went with the embryo adoption and that child grew up and met a brother/sister and fell in love....I know the possibilities aren't that high but still, even having a slim possibility kind of makes me rule out adoption :(

I'm interested in hearing how everyone else plans on handling this....I'm so confused about it all that I just have no idea what we'll do.
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Postby Hope644 » Mon Jan 21, 2008 6:18 pm

Hi Ladies-

Yes, the Sanctity of Life does bring up the crucial issue that we have as well...

I initially had more of a worry over this issue than I presently do - though that may change quickly with my next cycle. I had the same worries over having too many embies and what to do with them...???

After much thought and prayer, we decided that we would at least offer any frosties we had to my sister (47, dh 50, she has never had children, he has an 18 yo ds - she works with children and has always wanted one, but timing on their part hasn't been good - long story). Anyway, that was our plan... but it was really tough - knowing that if it worked, our true biological child would be our niece/nephew and there was the issue of whether or not they'd even want the embies.

Like Indie- I'd thought about anonymous donation - but I couldn't stand that thought at this point - somehow donating to my sister was easier.

Then there is the issue of let them die or donate to research... neither is a good option, in my opinion.

Well, in both rounds, we ended up with no frosties. We have had a total of 15 embies (between the 2) and both ETs were done on day 3. While we were disappointed that they didn't make it - we did receive the blessing of not having to make that choice. God made it for us. Of course, we hope that the next round is going to be the final round, we still hope for frosties, should we lose the next one or if we want a sibling... but the decision of what to do with the remaining embies is never an easy one...

I pray that God will lead each of us to know His will for the embies he creates in His Image and that we will follow his direction.

Regarding the timing of when life begins ... the pastor touched on that in church yesterday as well... He said, and I believe, that Life begins at Conception.

His scripture verses to support this were difficult for me to follow. I'll give them to you below so that you can refer to them if you want...

Gen 2:2 and 5:3, Acts 17:26, Matthew 1:20

I think what he was ultimately referring to is that God knows each person before they are created so the conception is the beginning of our physical being. He referred to David, during his time of repentance after committing adultery with Bathsheba and killed Uriah. David talks about his sin...

Psalm 51:5 Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me.

While I don't believe that embies or babies have actually SINNED, they have inherited the sin nature, as we all have. However, if we've inherited the sin nature from the time of conception - then, we must be alive at that point....
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Postby sonu911 » Mon Jan 21, 2008 9:38 pm

A hearty hello to all my sisters !!

I hope everyone is doing better than 'yesterday' and our 'FAITH' in Lord will make our tomorrow even better.

Thanks a lot, my dear HOPE for saying prayers for everyone, for taking time to write about each one of us. Image

Here's my point of view regarding ngoing discussion which is somewhat similar to hope, incidentally. We fertilized 8 embies in my last cycle (nothing could be saved from the first two cycles), three were transferred and 5 snow babies are in the lab. We still have to see how many survive the thaw for our FET cycle in March and then three will be transferred again, If we are able to save any, I am planning to donate it to my younger sis who is also going through severe malefactor issue. ''God help me and guide me through this''. I have not discussed this with any one but even if nothing is left after this cycle and fingers crossed I also concieve than I will certainly go through another cycle to give her embies...too much to think, but isn't it a place of hearty confessions??!! Though a lot will be at stake here. It was indeed God's plan to make both of us sail in the same ship, never imagined or guessed in our childhood that we would be facing this problem. But I am vrey positive about our future. Image

While cleaning my cupboard, I came across an old edition of 'Our Daily Bread', and this is what I found there-

ABOVE YOUR PROBLEMS-

Those who wait on the Lord...shall mount up with wings like eagles. - Isaiah 40:31

One of the pitfalls of living in our world is that we become problem-centered rather than God-centered. When this happens we lose the proper perspective. Gradually all our probems begin to look huge and the strength of almighty God seems small. Instead of moving mountains by faith, we become constant worriers, creating mountains of needless pressure for ourselves and others.
God offers us more than a perspective. He offers us something that will enable us to live by that view . If we will depend of Him instead of brooding over our problems, He will renew our strength, and wings of faith will lift our hearts above our difficulties. Some of them may be huge, but we can see them as smaller than our great God. And that makes all the difference.

Lord, give us wings to soar above
Our problems great and small,
With strengthened faith and confidence
To trust You with them all. - Sper

WORRY ENDS WHERE FAITH BEGINS.

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Me,DH-35
3 ICSIs-BFN
FET-BFP/mc@7wks
4#ICSI-BFP
Anay came on 17th FEB, 2009
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Postby nicaliw » Tue Jan 22, 2008 12:30 am

Its amazing that the topic is what to do with leftover embies cause my DH and I were just talking about exactly that 5 minutes ago.
I have 4 frozen embies that we have been planning on using for a FET asap (probably March/April). Our plan has always been to give excess embies up for adoption if we had enough (our RE require we have at least 6 frozen embies in order to give up for adoption). Like many of you, just destroying them is not an option. We'd rather end up with more kids than we planned or give some to another couple to raise than destroy them.
I started thinking earlier that maybe we should do another fresh cycle this time around because if we do the FET, thaw/use all 4 frozens, have a successful pregnancy, then we're done. But, if we do another fresh cycle we'll potentially have twice the number of frozen embies available to use in the future and/or donate.
I know I'm getting ahead of myself and would definitely feel truly blessed if only one more pregnancy is God's plan for me. I brought it up to my DH and he said he doesn't feel like it would be right to make more just to have a kind of stash (my words not his) of little people in the freezer. When he puts it like that, I have to say I think I agree.

Good news, by the way,.......drum roll......................
My beta is now NEGATIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAAAAAY. I'm so happy, thankyou for all of your prayers, prayer is so very powerfull. Also, I went back to work yesterday and didn't keel over with pain from my wisdom teeth holes hurting me. YAY. So, things are looking up. :D :D :D

My RE said I should see AF in the next few days (stil waiting). When I get AF he wants to do a lining check I'm not excatly sure why but I don't care as long as it means we're moving on. The nurse siad she'll make my calendar for the FET when I go in for the lining check.

I hope everyone is doing great.....I hope the stimmers are growing great follies and those in waiting with me are feeling well and getting closer to the next.

Does anyone mind telling me how you put those animations and sparkly things in the message, I've been trying to figure it out but it just left me scratching my head. Even my DH couldn't figure it out and he's a computer geek for a living!
FET April 18th
1st heartbeat 6w3d 115bpm, 9w2d hb 171bpm
MATTHEW ARRIVED DEC 19TH....8 lbs 9.7 OZ
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Postby waitingforMia » Tue Jan 22, 2008 12:35 am

Thanks to everyone for sharing your plan.
Sonu: You are right! I am much more problem centered than I am God centered!

During my first IVF overseas there was no facility to freeze leftover embies. SO I requested that the RE only fertilize 4 eggs. Three embies made it, but not after the ET.

Here in the states I have the option to freeze, but I still feel it is my responsibility to be prepared for the what ifs. if I have triplets and 4 embies still freezing, what will I do? WHat if I die?? I have a good friend who was my accountability partner before she moved out of state. I called her and asked if she and dh would pray about taking my embies if dh and I die. I told her she could use them or find another couple to donate them to. Now, if I am alive... and I can't use them. I would rather donate them than destroy them, so I would have to enter into a lot of praying and trust Godd to guide me to the right couple. But I am still a bit stressed about this idea. I wouldn't think twice about that friend of mine getting them, b/c I know she is a godly woman with similar values.

Ok must end this short, dh is going to be home soon and need to heat up his food. In short I am still praying about it myself. But I did tell the RE I was a more conservative number of embies, i.e. don't fertilize every egg. Once I know the # I will tell him how many to fertilize and pray it is enough. Ok ladies. Ya'll have a great night!

MP
Me: 28 Dh:32
TTC 8 yrs
2/3 2 blasts transferred
2/14 BFP Beta#1: 316; Beta#2 960
2/25 - u/s one baby! :)
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Postby nicaliw » Tue Jan 22, 2008 1:00 am

MP, when we were planning our first cycle I asked my RE if he could only fertilize a few follicles because we were afraid of having too many. He said he would but we actually changed our mind and decided to go with how they normally do it and fertilize them all. I'm glad we did. Our RE does mostly 5 day transfers because only a small percentage of all embryos make it to the 5 day stage, so doing a transfer earlier is a bit of a gamble but it also means that some that didn't make it to day 5 might have if they were transfered back earlier, so either way its a bit of a gamble. Anyway, the point I was going to make was out of 24 follicles, 20 were mature, 19 fertilized and only 6 made it to blastocycsts. At first I was worried by that low number but apparantly thats a very normal statistic (about 1 third). Who knew? So, Im not trying to have any influence on how you feel about your numbers but I wanted to offer you the opportunity to learn something I didn't know until we were already at the point where we had only 6 embies left. I was wondering how it would have turned out if he only fertilized the smaller number we were orginally thinking of.

I hope God leads you to a comfortable decision for you. How are your follies coming along? Are they counting and measuring them yet? Don't you feel a bit like mother hen with a collection of eggs in your tummy? I know I did.....ha ha. :lol:
FET April 18th
1st heartbeat 6w3d 115bpm, 9w2d hb 171bpm
MATTHEW ARRIVED DEC 19TH....8 lbs 9.7 OZ
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Postby Hope644 » Tue Jan 22, 2008 5:32 am

Real quick... you know I'll chime in again later!

MP - We'll be thinking of you for your scan tomorow!! Our prayers are with you!! Let us know how the scan goes!!

Nikki - I'll pm you with glitter/graphic info.

Love to you all... God bless!
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3rd IVF-BFP!
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Postby waitingforMia » Wed Jan 23, 2008 4:12 am

nicaliw wrote:Good news, by the way,.......drum roll......................
My beta is now NEGATIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAAAAAY. I'm so happy, thankyou for all of your prayers, prayer is so very powerfull. Also, I went back to work yesterday and didn't keel over with pain from my wisdom teeth holes hurting me. YAY. So, things are looking up. :D :D :D


Nica: So glad things are progressing. I am praying for AF to rear her head soon!! ANd thanks for the advice. I am just so worried we'd end up with 20 embies!! I know we will be at peace at the time with what we need to do. Until then I am praying for wisdom and sensitivity to God's direction. I have 9 follies measuring 10-13mm - so I am progressing right along :)

MP
Me: 28 Dh:32
TTC 8 yrs
2/3 2 blasts transferred
2/14 BFP Beta#1: 316; Beta#2 960
2/25 - u/s one baby! :)
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Postby nicaliw » Wed Jan 23, 2008 4:31 am

just a quickie, I'm going to bed...

Great news MP, thats a good number of follies. Plenty to work with but hopefully not so many that you'll have lots left over.

I'm happy things are going well with the follies. :D
FET April 18th
1st heartbeat 6w3d 115bpm, 9w2d hb 171bpm
MATTHEW ARRIVED DEC 19TH....8 lbs 9.7 OZ
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Postby cathann » Wed Jan 23, 2008 9:37 pm

Can I jump in here? I usually just stick to the IVF board and have never ventured to the general discussion board until today. What a wonderful thread you all have going here! It is very comforting to me to read your conversations and know that there are other Christians out there going through the same struggles as me.

I'm sure you all have talked about this, but does anyone else worry about this whole IVF thing messing with God's plan for you? I heard something on the radio this morning that touched me...it's easy to say that you're living by God's plan, but are you really? Maybe we are trying to follow God's plan in our own way. I wonder if, for me, this is following God's plan in HIS way or mine?

I try to tell myself that God would not have blessed all of these doctors with the talents they have if He hadn't intended on them using them to help others. Still, sneaky little doubts.

Thanks for letting me chime in. Blessings to you all!!
Cathann
Me=36
DH=34
Our 1st IVF/ICSI
ER 2/19
ET 2/23
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Postby waitingforMia » Wed Jan 23, 2008 9:48 pm

Cathann, Thanks for chiming in! We have talked about this on previous pages, and I think you are right; IVF can be us taking our life in our own hands. For me there was a three year period after my last treatment that God clearly said STOP. Since God does not have the same plan for each of us I think we all need to be sensitive to seeking His will for our life, which I know can be clouded by our own desires. I am very peaceful this round that God has led me to this decision, and I can only speak for myself.

Ladies, any other thoughts?

MP
Me: 28 Dh:32
TTC 8 yrs
2/3 2 blasts transferred
2/14 BFP Beta#1: 316; Beta#2 960
2/25 - u/s one baby! :)
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Postby Hope644 » Thu Jan 24, 2008 3:51 am

Hello my Dear Sisters in Christ -

First of all, let me say, since I so clearly missed the opportunity the other day :oops: - Nikki, congratulations on the good news!! I'm so glad your numbers finally made it back to ZERO!! YAY, now we can do the AF dance together! BTW, any sign of her??

Welcome Cathann!! We welcome you with open arms. Image So good to have you here. I see you are on Day 6 of your first IVF?!! We'd love to put you on our prayer list with more specifics if you don't mind... Just let us know. And yes, the question of are we tinkering with God's plan has crossed all of our minds... I think MP has a great point. We will pray that He brings you peace and comfort in knowing that the path you take is the path He has planned for you.

MP - So glad to hear the follies are growing well - they are coming right along!! Please keep us posted on their continued development!! God will give you peace regarding the numbers. :)

Sonu - Such a wonderful reminder that we must focus ourselves on Him, rather than our problems. I think it is something that we all need reminding of from time to time and sometimes more often than that. I know it is good for me this week. I am waiting on AF to begin BCPs for my next cycle. Patience has never been my strongest virtue... As of today, it has been 6 weeks and 5 days since my D&C. I have now been waiting for AF since I got my negative beta longer than I waited for the negative beta (Nikki, I hope you don't have the same results..:( ). But, I know that it's His plan in His timing. I don't want to rush Him, but I find myself thinking and wondering about my cycle more than I am relying on Him and WAITING on Him.

I was listening to the radio this morning and the pastor talked about us not praying for the right things. That we pray too much for health, happiness and for our troubles to go away. That instead, we should pray, as Paul did, for worthiness, fulfillment in sanctification, and honorable service to Him. I feel very convicted.

Then I think of the book I am reading (well, one of them) called When God Weeps. So far, it discusses the importance of suffering in our lives. Paul suffered in prison and Jesus certainly suffered for our sins.

Philippians 1:29 - It has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for him.

But our Lord longs to show us compassion and He truly cares about our suffering. Our suffering is not in vain. But at the same time, we must focus on Him and pray not for our suffering to end, but that through it we might draw closer to Him, be worthy of His compassion, and give the give of fruitful service to His honor and glory. I pray this for each one of us as we endure our individual struggles and suffering - whatever those may be, infertility related or otherwise. (btw, I do not consider my impatience with AF to be suffering... ;) )

Desiring to be His worthy and faithful servant...

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Postby Hope644 » Thu Jan 24, 2008 4:03 am

Hope644 wrote:ImageImageImage

Mia- Prayers for God's will, for healthy follies and a safe, fruitful ER on 1/28 Image
Weezie - Prayers for healthy follies and a safe, fruitful ER on 1/28 Image
Angela - Prayers for the upcoming FET - Jan 08 Image
Nikki - Prayers for healing after M/C, and strength in the upcoming cycle Image
Indie - Prayer for God's will and direction regarding IVF and decisions. Image
Princess - BFP on 1/18!! Image
Hope - Prayer for healing after M/C and strength in the upcoming cycle Image
Sonu - Prayer for upcoming FET - March 08 Image
Chelly - Prayer for comfort and encouragement through the IVF process Image
Cathann - Prayer for healthy follies and a safe and fruitful ER/ET Image

Image

Thank you, Lord, for the many blessings you have given us. Thank you for each and every person on this list. Please bless us and help us to know your will for our lives and Lord, to seek your will in all we do. Thank you God, for the blessing we have been to each other in this short time together. Please bless our friendships as we honor You! And help us, Father, to encourage and support one another through joy and laughter as well as through sorrow and tears. Teach us Lord, to love one another and others as You love us.

Draw us nearer to You, Lord, as we go through this process. Lord, whatever the path you have chosen for us, show us the way You want us to go. Grant us peace and comfort in your loving arms, Father Abba. Help us to know how our struggles and our suffering are important to you and how you long for us to grow through them and lean on You. Help us to know how to pray and for what to pray. Convict us in the areas of our lives that need correction and guide us back to the paths of fulfillment, sanctification, and righteousness.

In the Name of Your Precious Son, Jesus, Amen.

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4th IVF-BFP!
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Postby sonu911 » Thu Jan 24, 2008 6:44 am

Hello to all my dear sisters here!!

I came across this beautiful picture of a pregnant lady with a little foot imprinted on her belly.

Image

How ardently I pray my LORD that this comes true for all my sisters here!!
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Prayer for Conceiving a Child

Mother of Christ, you were graced by God with the privilege of bearing our Divine Savior. You experienced the joys and challenges of being a parent. Your life was blessed with seeing Jesus grow from infancy and childhood, into his adult years of teaching a ministry. With St. Joseph, you created a home for your family to love and share together. Please intercede before the God of all life, that Hope, weezie, Mia, Angela, Nikki, Indie, Sonu, Chelly, Cathann and Princess may conceive a baby and raise healthy children, with whom they can share the Lord's good gifts. May their children honor them and You by lives of virtue and caring for others. May their home be holy and their family be blessed with health, happiness and abiding love. Amen.
Me,DH-35
3 ICSIs-BFN
FET-BFP/mc@7wks
4#ICSI-BFP
Anay came on 17th FEB, 2009
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