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Postby CarolineP » Tue May 26, 2009 3:40 pm

Hi Catherine

Your comments regarding you and DH and 'same page' issues rang so many familiar bells with me. We had so many disagreements regarding schedules and controlled crying techniques. My DH used to call bedtime 'the white knuckle ride' - he could barely cope with 5 minutes of crying, he would sit downstairs like a statue until all was quiet.

Over the years I have come to learn that as parents we have very different ways of showing our love and devotion to our offspring. Whilst my DH has learnt to endure my tight routines and schedules, I have also learnt that, as time moves on and DD grows, rules are made to be broken and it isn't the end of the world and doesn't make you a bad mother if sometimes we vary the rules.

It has taken 3.5 years to reach a happy compromise!

Good luck
CarolineP
Me 50 DH 57 - TTC 10 years
IVF July 04, Sept 04, Dec 04 all -ive
Mar 05 +ive - Amelia Leah born 30/11/05
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Postby children » Thu May 28, 2009 5:44 am

Catharine,

I meant to reply your post the other day but I was severely sick in the past few days and only magically feel better today.

Same is true here about differences between me and my DH in parenting. However, he has to listen to me because the baby is calmer and behaves better in mommy's arms! I guess the difference between us women and men is that we read books/internet about HOW to take care of infants, they don't!

About weaning, I posted many times about it. Similar to you, it was hard to let go. I feel so bad now when I invite DD to take a nipple while feeding DS, she says no every time. She does not remember at all that I breast fed her. When I show pictures of my breast feeding her, she says the kid is Maxime!

Speaking of Maxime, the little son is thriving. He puts on big smiles every time when his eyes engage with others'. His teachers told me this was because he is male, they are born to know how to flirt. He sleeps through the night as long as his nose is not stuffed. He does not soil his diapers which amazes his teachers in the daycare. They would celebrate if he does occasionally (2 times in the past 3 weeks) - when I eat too much watermelon, he gets watery poops!

Okay, enough bragging. I am so proud to be a mother. I must admit that I enjoy being a parent much more than being pregnant. I think I will be a man in next life.

Take care, everyone.

Yasmina
Me, 50 DH, 40
IVF, 11/05, 19 embryos(e), no ET, OHSS
FET, 02/06, cancelled, dominant egg
FET, 04/06, 4e, BFN
FET, 06/06, 6e, DD born 02/07
FET, 05/08, 5e, DS born 01/09
http://yasminachina.blogspot.com/
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Postby Catharine » Tue Jun 09, 2009 2:53 pm

Good morning Ladies :D

Where to start and maintain some brevity [and levity].

Weaning [part I]: Well, I started last month each week removing a feeding from DD [of course replacing with formula]. This week is the first week no breastfeeding at all [since Sunday morning]. I'm very sad, and sore. DD crawls to me to latch on :cry: but I offer her the bottle instead. She does not resist. I lay down with her and stroke her forehead as she feeds from the bottle, grieving that this bond is slowly dissolving at my own hands :cry:

Weaning part II: Okay DD is 7 months old, I'm in the first week of grieving my loss over no longer breatfeeding and I still have not had a visit from AF. I'm not certain if I should be concerned or not. and then not certain when I should contact my doc to find out why. My concern has put me into a state of paralysis of sorts, augh!

Fitness: Ah yes I'm back to the pre-peg weight and size and nearly fitness level. Sadly I suffered a minor set back. It came from no where. I have re-injured my SI joint [in the pelvis]; reinjured due to the loosey-goosey state of my joints post-partum. Now I'm on a quest to figure out how to shore up my pelivic joints. If anyone has suggestions I'm all ears and eyes [reading]. Last night at football training I 'dislocated' my hip making a defensive cut while protecting the goals. Talk about pain. It's not really a dislocation, but that's this best word to discribe what felt like happened: my leg slipping out of location within the deep recess of the pelvis. It took a few moments for it to slide back into position, but that was it for me for the night :( So, now I'm on a mission to shore up the pelvis by using a combination of exercises and as I said I welcome any other advice and suggestions on this topic to aid in my quest.

Levity: I played in a football tournament this past weekend. By the third game I was beat. Although I still had some 'gas' in me my mental acutity was shot. Our team was forced to change our jersy colors from navy blue to red as our opponents were also Navy blue. In the second half, the heat, the exhaustion had set in on my mind. I managed to pass the ball the wrong direction down the field to the other team. Bit Ooooopppppps! New Rule: Sit Catharine out if there is a color jersy change, she can not handle the change :lol: By the fourth and final game I was on board again mentally with some extra gas as well and scored in the second half contributing to our victory. Yippeee! :D

Levity partII: I wanted to share this with you. DD has been taking 'swim lessons' [aka getting use to the pool water]. Yesterday with ten minutes to spare in the class, she fell asleep while floating on her back. All that was supporting her was my hand cupping the back of her precious head. She looked so serene just floating in the water. Wish I had a pic to share. The instructor got one and hopefully will be able to share with me.

Wishing everyone well.
Cheers!
Catharine
Me 46 DH 46
ttc > 5y
1 IVF Feb08 BFP singleton born Nov, '08
1 IVF Nov09 BFN
1 IUI May10,Sept10, Oct10 BFNs

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Postby children » Tue Jun 09, 2009 6:58 pm

Catharine,

I love your parenting stories. More...whenever you have the time!

Both DD and DS like to be in the the water. We take them to the pool once a week.

Your weaning story made me sad too. I don't like pumping so I wanted to stop breast feeding now. But DH wants me to stop only after we will be back from France since he thinks breast feeding makes life easier during plane rides. Now your weaning story reminded me once again how sad I was when I was weaning our DD. My guess is that I will keep feeding him at least twice a day for as long as he likes.

I am a bit surprised that you have not gotten your period yet. This may have something to do with your "sporty" life style, although each person has different schedule. When I had DD, my AF showed up exactly at 6 month postpartum. This time, AF still has not come yet. I expect the same time frame as last time.

DS has started to take solid food and he loved it from the second time on for a few times and quickly progressed from 1 oz rice cereal to 2 oz per feeding. He even had 2 oz sweet potato thickened with rice cereal in one go on the third day that he was exposed to solid food. So, I thought he was completely ready and went ahead to ask the day care teachers to feed him rice cereal. Unfortunately, they only succeeded for exactly once!!!! Now he turns his head away from a spoon! I am now slowing down to only 1 oz per feeding per day.

The good news is DD starts to realize it's time for her to ditch diapers in the night now. She is so proud whenever her diaper is dry while waking up. She keeps on telling us that her diaper is DRY, repeatedly, whenever she has one. She must have learnt the word "dry" from her teachers. As long as she will have dry diapers 5 days in a row, I will stop putting a diaper on her. We did not do much on the night potty training, what her daddy did was just simple to ask her not to pee in the diapers each night before sending her to bed. He tells her to call us if she needs to go in the middle of the night, although she has never done so so far.

Back to work now. Talk you all next time.

Yasmina
Me, 50 DH, 40
IVF, 11/05, 19 embryos(e), no ET, OHSS
FET, 02/06, cancelled, dominant egg
FET, 04/06, 4e, BFN
FET, 06/06, 6e, DD born 02/07
FET, 05/08, 5e, DS born 01/09
http://yasminachina.blogspot.com/
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Postby Catharine » Sun Jun 21, 2009 12:08 pm

:D To our wonderful DHs: Happy Father's day :D

Nothing much to report; okay that's not true. There's so much to choose from I'm overwhelmed in deciding which to tell and how to present them.

I'll just start with a story that is appropo for today. DD did her first art project this week, clay cast of her right hand and left foot imprints, as her father's day gift to her Dadadada. It was quite the challenge to juggle her and place the appropriate apendage on the clay let alone press firmly to make the imprint. All DD wanted to play was wiggle worms. But in the end we got a beautiful imprints and I wrote her name and date next to them. To accompany the imprints I took a photo of her playing in a big comfy, cozy, chair. We presented this gift to DH this morning and it just brought tears to his eyes to have such a special gift made personally by his DD.

On a separate topic: I've been trying to get passport photos for DD and so far every place I've gone [the strip mall stores advertising this service] will not do babies. Any suggestions?

Wishing everyone all the best
Catharine
Me 46 DH 46
ttc > 5y
1 IVF Feb08 BFP singleton born Nov, '08
1 IVF Nov09 BFN
1 IUI May10,Sept10, Oct10 BFNs

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Postby Catharine » Sun Jun 21, 2009 1:07 pm

Yasmina-you must be so proud of both your children. I'm impressed with your DD's 'dry' telling. How's DS and his solids? Our little DD is finely enjoying the fruitful adventure. At first she didn't like fruits; perhaps they were to tart for her. But now she puts up with them still preferring her veggies. Meat is not a favorite of hers but if she has a preference I'd say she preferrs lamb>beef>ham>chicken>turkey in that order. But again she really would rather stick to the veggies.


couldn't resist a few pix
Father's Day picture
Image

Sleeping swimmer
Image

Enjoy hearing everyone's stories. Really enjoy the communication.
All the best,
Catharine
Me 46 DH 46
ttc > 5y
1 IVF Feb08 BFP singleton born Nov, '08
1 IVF Nov09 BFN
1 IUI May10,Sept10, Oct10 BFNs

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Postby children » Wed Jun 24, 2009 4:42 pm

Wow, I am so jealous of the photo that your DD on the water!

First, passport photos, both of our children had them before 4 m old. We had them done at post office where we applied for their passports which were mailed to our house within a week! BTW, the photo taker just put the babies on the floor with a white blanket as background and then took the picture from above.

Solid, no, DS still does not like to take the second spoon. All I could do now is to feed him one spoon (2 ml of rice cereal) per day.

Father's day, DH got one from his DS, the day care teachers made his footprint on a piece of drawing. DH did not seem to be happy, I did not even hear him thanking the teacher!

Overwhelmed by the coming trip to France now. More later. I do too, love to read/tell parenting stories here.

Yasmina
Me, 50 DH, 40
IVF, 11/05, 19 embryos(e), no ET, OHSS
FET, 02/06, cancelled, dominant egg
FET, 04/06, 4e, BFN
FET, 06/06, 6e, DD born 02/07
FET, 05/08, 5e, DS born 01/09
http://yasminachina.blogspot.com/
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Postby Catharine » Sun Jul 05, 2009 12:56 am

Greetings Ladies :D

Yasmina thanks for the advice. I've tried a white sheet and we'll see what they say. the next step will be white poster board on the ground if they don't like the sheet.

Caroline and Tammy how's it going?

We've been busy. Today was hectic being the 4th of July. Happy 4th by the way. DH and I got up early and left DD in the care of my parents who came and spent the night. We ran the 40th annual Peachtree Road Race. Thankfully the weather could not have been better: low humidity, fairly low morning temps for this time of year, and a nice cool breeze wafting along the path. We finished in under an hour, got to visit with old friends then rushed home where we were expecting more family [one of which also ran the road race] for a cook out. The day is winding down and I'm bushed we'll be sleeping well tonight as long as DD does.

DD is growing in leaps and bounds. She is trying to walk already :shock: okay that's probably an exageration. But she is pulling herself up on everything that is stationary and then practicing her balancing along with if we hold her she does walk. She's got the timing down and all for the steps. Yikes! we will be stepping up our baby proofing of the house to yesterday :wink: She is a quick study on the cause/effect topic. She uses tonation yelling to communicate her likes and dislikes as well as needs. It's cute but I don't want her to know how cute she is at this time and really take advantage of me more than she already has. Bless her little heart. So, to work on her balance we play on an exercise ball, performing various activities to strengthen her core.

Wishing everyone all the best,
Catharine
Me 46 DH 46
ttc > 5y
1 IVF Feb08 BFP singleton born Nov, '08
1 IVF Nov09 BFN
1 IUI May10,Sept10, Oct10 BFNs

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Postby Catharine » Wed Jul 15, 2009 1:15 am

Hey-
I was expecting AF this past Saturday and still no sign. I'm scheduled to have a mammogram on Friday and so as not to go for not, I've decided to take an HPT. If the docs at the children's hospital wouldn't let me be in for DDs procedure I'm sure the mammogram wouldn't be good either just in case. Fingers crossed. Of course AF may still not be regularly scheduled even thoug BF ceased a month ago. And least not forget the age factor. I'm a bit nervous about this. Will keep ya'll posted.

How's everyone else doing?

Catharine
Me 46 DH 46
ttc > 5y
1 IVF Feb08 BFP singleton born Nov, '08
1 IVF Nov09 BFN
1 IUI May10,Sept10, Oct10 BFNs

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Postby Catharine » Wed Jul 15, 2009 3:03 pm

Hey All-
AF arrived this morning :( But this gives us a start date to monitor for ovulations.

Best wishes to everyone,
Catharine
Me 46 DH 46
ttc > 5y
1 IVF Feb08 BFP singleton born Nov, '08
1 IVF Nov09 BFN
1 IUI May10,Sept10, Oct10 BFNs

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Postby children » Wed Jul 22, 2009 5:45 pm

Hi everyone,

I am back from our vacation and I am always kind of negative when people ask about our trips. Now I know that is probably because the work accumulated in my absence depresses me...

DD has leant a lot of French in the last 20 days and so did I! I guess this helps me in getting French passport so that I don't have to deal with visa problems next time going to France!

Catharine,

Yes, DS made significant progress in taking solids. We have been feeding him rice cereal with breast milk or formula in the last 20 days (once per day). However, he starts to grow teeth which does not help sleeping through the night. During vacation, I did not care and just picked him up to the bed with us whenever he cried. Now, we will need to work on this night waking issue so that we can move him out of our room soon.

Everyone who is reading here,

Take care and enjoy your little ones!

Yasmina
Me, 50 DH, 40
IVF, 11/05, 19 embryos(e), no ET, OHSS
FET, 02/06, cancelled, dominant egg
FET, 04/06, 4e, BFN
FET, 06/06, 6e, DD born 02/07
FET, 05/08, 5e, DS born 01/09
http://yasminachina.blogspot.com/
children
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Location: USA

Postby Catharine » Fri Jul 24, 2009 11:20 pm

TGIF :D

How is everyone!

Yasmina-glad to here ya'll had a good holiday in Europe, esp after the start with the visa issue. I can not imagine the situation. I will chalk it up to being an ignorant American. Yes we travel and have had to have passports but so far no VISAs. Good to hear son is enjoying the rice cereal. If you get a chance oh would be so nice to see pix of your DS and DD.

Tammy-how's it going? How is Andrew?

Caroline-hey, haven't seen you post here in awhile. Wishing you well.

AFM-DD is growing by leaps and bounds. Okay she's not getting longer, she is getting heavier. I have the biceps to show for that, hahaha. She's currently standing and 'cruising' along furniture, sofa and coffee table. She's an independent miss, willing to express her opinions on any topic she seems fit. I guess we've been really blessed. The few friends and family close by with wee ones close to her age have greater struggles. It's sometimes hard relating to them. I feel for the situations but all I can offer is an ear to talk to, no advice. I try not to volunteer too many of our experiences since they seem to lack the same complexities as our friends and family. This weekend will start testing for ovulation. What is behind the yearning for a sibling for DD? well truth is in part just the experiences we've had these past 8.5 months. I want to do it all over again. I also feel guilty [prematurely] that Aislin is an only child [at the moment]. Call me Crazy. We are very thankful for her presence. I'm very thankful for the lovely women on this site who have made the journey more tolerable.

Thank you all. Wishing each one of you all the best.
Catharine
Me 46 DH 46
ttc > 5y
1 IVF Feb08 BFP singleton born Nov, '08
1 IVF Nov09 BFN
1 IUI May10,Sept10, Oct10 BFNs

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Postby children » Wed Jul 29, 2009 11:28 am

Catharine,

Thanks for asking, here you go, some pics of us. DD likes to feed her little brother, but this only when she is in a good mood which is rare now. She has been quite difficult lately unless you take her out of the daycare. DS is a joy and he would smile to everyone who comes close to him. Did I tell you that I shaved his hair to bold at his 3 month of age? Now, it grew back. However, he never slept through the night during and after our vacation. I don't think that I tried anything to change this situation. He has his first ear infection before leaving and now he is teething, his bottom two teeth broke through right after we were back from France. Strangely, I am not too tired to deal with this night waking and I somewhat enjoy to spend time with him alone in the dark.

Caroline P,

Did you have hard time to deal with your DD when she is at this age, 2.5 yr old? DD is very unpredictable, her mood changes so quickly. She also does not eat as well as before. I blame myself not to attend her enough ever since I was pregnant with DS and I suspect that DS's arrival hurt her somehow. I am trying to reconnect with her by spending as much time as possible with her at the moment.

Tammy,

How is Andrew doing? He has been a sweet boy and I don't think that he is as difficult as Eloise. She is so cute when she whines in French. DS is awake now, I need to go. I did not go back to sleep after DS's woke me up at 3 am!

Take care, everyone.
Yasmina


Image
Me, 50 DH, 40
IVF, 11/05, 19 embryos(e), no ET, OHSS
FET, 02/06, cancelled, dominant egg
FET, 04/06, 4e, BFN
FET, 06/06, 6e, DD born 02/07
FET, 05/08, 5e, DS born 01/09
http://yasminachina.blogspot.com/
children
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Posts: 491
Joined: Tue Apr 04, 2006 6:59 pm
Location: USA

Postby CarolineP » Thu Jul 30, 2009 4:34 pm

Hello ladies

I enjoy greatly reading all your updates but sadly I am not as good as you at contributing regularly to this thread.

Yasmina, I never had any difficulty with DD and I think that this is one of the bonus's of having an only child. I suspect like a lot of my friends with younger siblings, that your DD behaviour is that of older sibling via for attention.

It is perfectly natural and there doesn't seem to be any hard and fast rule how to improve it quickly. Most of my friends try to put aside sometime during the day for 'special time' with the older child.

One friend makes an effort at the end of the day to do a verbal diary of her DD day. E.G they go through the day, describing what has been eaten at each meal, play time, naughty times. The mother or father reinforce their joy at the good behaviour/eating during the day and 'must do better/not again' the bad naughty behaviour. They seem to have some positive results from this type of one to one communication.

AFM - we are all doing great, DD is thriving. Our pre-school has closed for the summer, so I have DD all day. I am lucky as my local gym has a creche facility which DD loves and I can book 2 hour sessions while I attend classes or slog my guts out in the gym. We also have lots of play dates at home and visiting friends which can be challenging if the weather is not good. We also try to swim once a week, DD can now touch the bottom and is getting very confident with no arm bands but does not kick hard enough to swim properly.

I live in constant fear (lol) that my DH will realise that I love being a Mum too much and suggest going back to work!!!!!!

Regards and good luck you all
CarolineP
Me 50 DH 57 - TTC 10 years
IVF July 04, Sept 04, Dec 04 all -ive
Mar 05 +ive - Amelia Leah born 30/11/05
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Postby Catharine » Fri Jul 31, 2009 6:22 am

:D good early morning!

Yasmina-the pictures are beautiful. Your DD seems to be enjoying her role as big sister :) Both appear to be so happy. How proud you and your DH must be. I'm curious how do you make the collages as such. They are fantastic.

Caroline-the advice, personal and second hand, you have passed along is priceless. I hope I can remember it when we reach those particular milestones.

Tammy-how are you and yours? Thinking of you.

AFM-waiting to ovulate in hopes of creating a sibling for DD [the natural way]. This week I took DD to the aquarium in town. Outside of the massive crowds of summer campers attending before school returns to session we had a grand time. She enjoyed watching the fish swim past her. You could just see the little wheels turning in her head as she processed the information, so cute.

Wishing everyone well.
Catharine
Me 46 DH 46
ttc > 5y
1 IVF Feb08 BFP singleton born Nov, '08
1 IVF Nov09 BFN
1 IUI May10,Sept10, Oct10 BFNs

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