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my fault

Discussion forum for those who had completed their IVF treatments without a successful outcome and are seeking other options such as adoption, surrogacy etc.

my fault

Postby chrisbaby » Fri Nov 05, 2010 10:16 am

i am stil going through ivf, however not reacting to the highest dosage of FSH as l should be. we are doing one more cycle biut i am not hopeful. my husbane is constantly starting conversations with 'when we have our kid..' and l keep saying 'if we have a kid..' he doesnt get it - he is so hopeful. it makes me feel so bad, as this is all my fault...for the past 15 years i have been obsessed with exercise - l love it..as a result l had low body fat and was deficient in fats and minerals. i have tried to change (which has been very hard) but nothing is working...

bottom line,. how will colin forgive me when l cant give him something he wants because of my previous actions..i am riddled with guilt...what if i am stuffing up his life..he says he loves me etc..but what happens in 5 years time when he really wishes he had a kid - who does he blame - me -ligitamey, i have had a laproscy..everything is where is should be..the problem is how i abused my body - eating disorder, over erercise etc...\

i hang my head in shame...
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Re: my fault

Postby DandMe » Wed Nov 10, 2010 4:57 am

It seems you have been feeling shame and pressure put on yourself for years... the eating habits... the exercise... and now this...

I don't know how old you are, but it sounds like you still have time to get yourself together.... get some counselling for the eating and exercise, see a nutritionist and focus on what you need to do to make your mind healthy - your body will listen!!

You didn't set out to make this journey difficult. You didn't ask for the issues you have.. but you do now know you have them and have the power to remove them from your life. There is a billion dollar industry out there designed to help people who need a hand up. Take advantage of it - not only for your husband, and your children to be.. but for you!!

((hugs))
Sonya, 40 - DS, 24 DS, 22
David, 45
unexplained
2008 BFP, 2010 IVF & FET MC
2010 IVF #2 - BFP
14dpo 138
16dpo 351
Perfect pregnancy/Delivery July 2011
FET #2 June 2012
ImageImage
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Re: my fault

Postby brit1612 » Mon Nov 15, 2010 9:50 pm

If all the issues have been caused by diet and excercise, it seems like they could be reversed. Please don't give up. My husband and I went through five years of fertility treatments and three miscarriages before having our baby boy in March. Hopefully you will not have to go through all of this I just wanted you to know that it can happen, no matter how out of reach it seems. I don't think your husband will blame you, my husband is the one with the infertility and I have never resented him for it.

Also, you may not need fertility treatments. There is an ebook that talks about natural remedies for curing infertility. If you go to the link in my signature it talks about it. Good luck with everything!!
After 7 attempts (2 negatives/3 miscarriages), we have TWO miracle boys!! If you would like to hear our story, please visit http://www.ivfsuccessstories.info. Never give up, it can happen for you!!
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Re: my fault

Postby Alette » Fri Jan 07, 2011 1:33 am

it is no ones fault, sometimes nature is cruel.

do not feel guilty.

you ARE DOING everything you can: IVF: the last thing you can do to have a child of your own, to receive naturally.
(maybe adoption , if you are fortunate.. to have the chance to go through this procedure..)

but please do not feel guilty, men see this differently... they are more optimistic, a way to survive I think...
after lots of IUI, 4 FETs and 5 IVF's
a babyboy!
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Admin, where are you?! WTF?! m?..

Postby DwachNess » Tue Jan 11, 2011 10:36 pm

If all the issues have been caused by diet and excercise it seems like they could be reversed. Please dont give up. My husband and I went through five years of fertility treatments and three miscarriages before having our baby boy in March. Hopefully you will not have to go through all of this I just wanted you to know that it can happen no matter how out of reach it seems. I dont think your husband will blame you my husband is the one with the infertility and I have never resented him for it.Also you may not need fertility treatments. There is an ebook that talks about natural remedies for curing infertility. If you go to the link in my signature it talks about it. Good luck with everything


wow, seriously?!

ANY QUESTIONS???
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