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we are having problem with basic intercourse itself.

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we are having problem with basic intercourse itself.

Postby maria.johnson457 » Fri Oct 14, 2011 6:56 am

Dear Madam, I am 38 and my wife is 34 years. We got married in May'1997. Since our marriage, we are having problem with basic intercourse itself. My wife got it checked with a couple of Gynaecologists. They did not find any problem physically or physiologically. They found that the only difficulty is the non- cooperation from my wife due to some psychological and emotional factors acting on her.

In the year 2000, we have approached an infertility expert at Hyderabad and explained all the problems. She advised us to go for IVF treatment. We got it done at their place. As a result my wife became pregnant. The regular check up's were done at some other hospital near our home. There was miscarriage in the 5th month. After the above incident, we have not approached any doctor. Somehow things became very difficult due to some domestic issues. Our priorities in life changed.

Presently we are at Chennai. We went thro your column in the Indian express. I am sending this query for necessary help from your side. We would like to know if you have any centre at Chennai to meet you personally. Kindly help us in resolving this issue. The childlessness issue has become a big problem for us. We are not able to keep ourselves in a happy mood at all. I am expecting a reply from your side for the further action.
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Joined: Fri Oct 14, 2011 6:53 am

Re: we are having problem with basic intercourse itself.

Postby Infertility » Mon Oct 17, 2011 10:58 am

Unfortunately, in India Sex has been made a taboo by a retrograde and backward culture and social mores. This is basically aimed at the oppression and exploitation of woman as a lesser human being. Very few people get knowledge before marriage. Because of lack of information, the stigma attached to sexuality and eroticism, the taboos, the frowning and derision with which this backward and male dominated society looks at women and their awareness, many woman become frigid or come to violently abhor sex and Sexual intimacy, and cannot co-operate or participate in sex even when they love and respect their husband. The victim woman is totally blameless in this. The society, the husband, his family and the family of the wife have to share and shoulder responsibility, take good care of the woman and help her transform herself with openness and transparency. She needs appropriate counseling and support.

An ideal way could be the wife and husband reading erotic books, episodes, novels, watching erotic movies on the TV or CDs, discussing between them about erotic things while being intimate and arousing each other, encouraging her to please herself with fingers during this period for clitoral and vaginal stimulation, use of artificial penis called dilido in a slow and exploratory manner that can gradually chase away the fears and nightmarish feelings. Once the woman understands and believes that sexual intercourse is natural, desirable , leads to a noble bond between a couple, is the only natural (and god’s as many of us would believe) way of perpetuating the enrichment and continuity of our species then she would have no problem in transforming herself into a very fine person with fine sexuality. Without the adults in a society attaining and practicing a healthy and positive sexuality – the society could be causing too much of social and emotional trauma in the lives of all people in that society. Such an avoidable trauma has been found to hold up or slow down the overall development of the individuals, the society, the nation and the whole world in general !

Coming to the infertility problem, as your wife is already 34 years, good results can be obtained in IVF treatment if you try soon. Advancing age brings down the success rate. We can expect about 35% success with each attempt. A very important thing that some IVF facilities overlook or do not pay sufficient attention is that after a successful pregnancy – we have to treat every case as a high risk pregnancy and take all necessary preventive steps. With due care and caution we can prevent over 80% of otherwise probable miscarriages during pregnancy. Still about 20% of the problem cases can not be avoided inspite of watchful and pre-emptive treatment. Next time when she conceives, it should be possible to take some preventive steps and reach till successful delivery and healthy baby.

While we do not yet have a facility of our own at Chennai, that may not be an issue if there is a felt need! What with apex fares and low cost air lines being available just around a couple of thousand rupees or even less !

Please feel to contact at http://www.fertilityindia.com/

Email : ramafertility@gmail.com | ramafertility@yahoo.com
Phone : +91-040- 23401135, 23402294 | 9989223320, 9989223342, 9989223343, 9989223302
Address : 6-3-788/33, Opp. Chandana Brothers, Ameerpet, Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh, India
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