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new girl on the block

Postby daisy1 » Tue May 17, 2005 10:57 am

Hi there everyone
I have to say I´m a bit lost and lonely. I live in Spain and my partner is spanish. Although I am at ease with the language I have to say that I am finding everything a bit scary and am unsure of whether we are moving in the right direction. To top it all am very computer unfriendly and most of the time stumble upon things by accident. This stumble is an absolute godsend. Our problem from what I understand is a sperm motility prob. So if anyone out there can advise or at least push me in the right direction, you would make my day :D
daisy1
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Postby Sand » Tue May 17, 2005 11:12 am

Hi Daisy ... Welcome to the site. I'm sorry you're feeling a bit lost and lonely. Hopefully the girls on these boards can help support you.

There are many girls on these boards who have a male factor problem, so you are far from alone (I have too).

There is a book that we recommend which is called "Fertility and Conception" by Zita West. The book deals with fertility facts, natural conception and has a chapter on assisted conception too. It gives you insight into male fertility problems and how to help improve your chances. The book's available through Amazon on the internet, or I'm sure your local bookshop could order it for you.

This site is used by girls from many countries - many continents even ! .. and we have a few girls who are living outside of their homelands. I'm sure some of them will be able to relate to how you are feeling.

What do you mean .. you are unsure whether you are moving in the right direction ??

Sandra x
Me 41 yrs old - dh 49 yrs old. ttc 110 yrs.
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11
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Postby taylorjools » Tue May 17, 2005 11:27 am

Hi Daisy sweetie, welcome :lol: :lol:

I live in Germany and my husband is German, it does get lonely sometimes without mother tongue girlie friends doesn't it?? I do have a couple of good German girl friends but we've only been here 2 years so it takes time. This board has been a God send for me, I hope you find it so too. Do let us know a bit more about your story, there is so much experience here I am sure someone will be able to help. I have POF and hubby (dh) has antibodies in his sperm so they have to be specially prepared, and we are doing ICSI and in Barcelona as we can get donor eggs with no waiting list there. Where are you in Spain??

Have you found a good clinic??? The Spanish clinics seem to be excellent to me, a lot better than some of the stories from the UK...

anyway, see you on the general forum

Love bigJ 8)
POF+autoimmune+dh antibodies,5.05 DIVF IM M/c 7.5 wks, DIVF+TESE at ISIDA - son 08/06
FET ISIDA: 12.07.07 m/c 8 wks b.ovum, 17 Dec 2007- BFP triplets OMG!!!
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Postby daisy1 » Tue May 17, 2005 12:00 pm

Well, in a nut shell. We were trying for approx 3 years when we decided to actually look into why nothing was happening. DH had a semen test and it came up with a low sperm count and a motility prob and from there my gynaecologist sent us straight to an assisted reproduction centre where apparently we are supposed to launch straight into ICSI. I kinda of think that there might be a step in between we are missing out.
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Postby daisy1 » Tue May 17, 2005 12:07 pm

oops forgot to mention thanks sandra and also to bigj, and in reply to your question I live in the south of spain in Malaga. So when are you in Barcelona.
daisy1
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Postby Sand » Tue May 17, 2005 12:10 pm

Hi Daisy ... As far as I'm aware, apart from trying to improve sperm quality with vits/supplements, the only way forward is ICSI.

Sandra x
Me 41 yrs old - dh 49 yrs old. ttc 110 yrs.
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11
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Postby NickiMark » Tue May 17, 2005 1:10 pm

hello Daisy!
So glad u found us, yes you said it....It's a god send here. The only peeps who understand re the peeps on here!!!

As Sandra said sounds like icsi is ur option, we though that was ours but dh has no sperm so thats not an option now. I am mid cycle of my 1st iui.
TTC 6yrs......Have jumped off the rollercoaster for now, too many BFN's and too much heartache, to keep going....Moving on to fulfil other dreams!!!
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Postby DebraP » Tue May 17, 2005 6:55 pm

Hi Daisy, there are actually quite of few of us with foreign partners, living in their countries and going through treatment in another language. I understand your concerns completely.

We don't have male factor but I've read accounts of people that say quite radical changes in lifestyle and nutrition can help make a difference. The book Sandra referred to has a lot of advice on what men can do to improve their side of the deal.

Good luck and well done on your stumble onto this board. If you've a date for treatment, or even your first apt. have a look on the General Forum for the different monthly groups. These are people chatting together as they prepare for tmt. The support side of this board is totally overwhelming at times, amazing and never fails to inspire me.

The best of luck,
Debra (a Brit in Norway with a Norwegian DF).
Me: 44, DH: 31
Game Over.
Dates: Aug 02 - May 06
Tries: 5 fresh + 4 frozen.
Results: 1 daughter, 2 m/c, 1 ectopic.
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Postby Tracii » Wed May 18, 2005 6:28 am

Hi Daisy, Like BigJ I am also living in Germany and Austria - but going through treatments in Germany for insurance reasons. My Dh is English but has lived in Germany for over 15 years, I am American. It all gets very, very confusing - one with the language and two the IVF world has lots of medical terminology which will also be new to you. We have tried to conceive for over 2 years, 1 year of really, really trying. We went the same route and tried to find out what was going wrong.

In September 2004, DH had his sperm tested...motility at 10%!!!! Luckily at the time we didn't know this was so bad (totally ignorant) otherwise DH's ego would have been devastated. In January went for another test - went up to 21%! In March went up to 56%!!! :D :D Deep down inside I know this has a lot to do with stress - in September he was in between jobs. He now takes a multi-vit, drinks a lot more water (although I would like him to drink more), cut down on drinking beer/wine (although he still enjoys a glass of wine a night), eats nuts and basically being healthier and happier all-around. The doctor is still concerned the 56% was a one-off, but we continue to think positive that his motility will stay above 50%.

If you are unsure of the IVF/ICSI route...write down all your questions for you clinic and get the answers you need so you feel comfortable. This forum is also an excellent source of information...don't be afraid to ask us.
Traci
me37,DH49
IUI 01/05:-
1. IVF - 04/05: -
2. IVF -cancelled -preg nat-m/c 5w3d
3. IVF -success
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Postby daisy1 » Wed May 18, 2005 9:55 am

Hi Traci
Thanks so much for replying. It is so good to hear similiar stories and I have to say since yesterday (when I found this site) I feel so much more positive and not at all lonely anymore. This may seem very naive but I was kinda hoping that if dh´s sperm count improved and motility too perhaps we wouldn´t need to go ICSI route. DH has given up smoking, hardly drinks anymore and in general is much more active. Although I have to say he has alot to make up for. Let´s just say he rather enjoyed his youth upto a very late age! We have been to see an infertility specialist who kept saying all it needs is one. He is just about to have blood and urine tests etc etc etc. and was told that if it was hormonal he could take some drugs and from what I gather problem solved. Could this be true? or is this a lost in translation thing. However when my gynaecologist saw results of sperm test she sent us straight to reproduction centre, where they were ready to start immediately with tests on me, is this normal?
Í´m sure it is but I kinda of feel a bit lost in the fact that I am not conversing in my mother tongue so it makes me feel a little insecure too.

PS. Should I know start posting on General forum
daisy1
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Postby LittleP » Wed May 18, 2005 10:39 am

Hi Daisy

Welcome to this site - I guess you've already realised how helpful everyone is here, they're great!!

Definitely come and join us on the General Forum - the more the merrier.

Take care and loads of PMA and hugs to you.

Little P
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Postby Tracii » Wed May 18, 2005 7:29 pm

Hi Daisy,

When my ob/gyn saw DH's first test results (which was a couple of months after the fact), she said with 10% it would be almost impossible for us to conceive. So we went to the infertility clinic where they started tests on me as well to check my hormone levels. I went through a couple of months of monitoring of ovulation and hormones. I would ask the clinic exactly what tests they will be performing and to ask for a rough timeschedule. You have a right to ask as many questions as you want - and no question is stupid. We are talking about your bodies and creating another human being. My clinic is not overtly caring...but when I have questions, they do take the time to answer them. And of course..we are always here for you!
Traci
me37,DH49
IUI 01/05:-
1. IVF - 04/05: -
2. IVF -cancelled -preg nat-m/c 5w3d
3. IVF -success
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Postby dancola » Thu May 19, 2005 10:32 am

Hi Daisy, another (sort of) expat here with male factor. My DH is Italian and we live in London during the week and commute to Italy alternate weekends. DH wants us to move there soon, but we’re staying in London whilst we undergo treatment. Am sure treatment in Italy is good (maybe even more advanced than the UK) but I feel more comfortable being treated at home in my mother tongue (though I am fluent in Italian). Also in Italy there’s a total lack of privacy (we’ve told no one) as if you sneeze, his family want to discuss it! DH is also very wary of the whole process (even though we’re doing it because of male factor) and won’t come to scans or appointments with me, so given his lack of enthusiasm I prefer to have treatment on my terms!

As far as ICSI goes, you have not missed a step in treatment. For male factor, there IS no other option. IUI or regular IVF just won’t do it. To us it was a lifeline hearing about ICSI. DH’s count is very low – 2m in December at our first attempt, and plummeted down to 0.2m in April. His level of abnormal cells is very poor at 90%, motility is around 50% (but is useless without a high count) and strength is not that good. In fact, my consultant has just recommended he try a fairly new American supplement called Proxeed to help get his count and quality back up before our 3rd attempt. It’s a powder form supplement that he drinks with juice twice a day. The vitamins that men need to take for male factor are A, C, E and selenium and zinc. We’ve tried the Zita Vitamen but now he takes a general male fertility supplement along with this Proxeed. It’s worth looking up on the internet. My consultant told me he’s seen some good results (not cheap though – cost 168 Euros for 3 months’ supply).

In terms of vits, sperm takes 3 months to ‘grow’ a fresh supply and apparently a further 72 days to fertilise. They say you need to take vits for a minimum of 3 months before seeing any results. So for eg if your DH took vits in January, he wouldn’t see any increase in count etc until April.

Good luck with the treatment.
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