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my first IVF

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my first IVF

Postby Pootle » Sun Jul 24, 2005 3:24 pm

I am new to this site and am just about to start my first IVF. (age 35)

I cannot help feeling sad and depressed - Is this normal?

I have had one cycle of IUI before without drugs but thought it would maximise my chances by going straight to IVF - I am really scared though that it won't work.

Just like to chat to someone who can help me from feeling sad and depressed.

Pootle xx :(
Posts: 59
Joined: Sun Jul 24, 2005 3:13 pm
Location: Buckinghamshire England


Postby Sand » Sun Jul 24, 2005 3:58 pm

Hey Pootle - Welcome to the Site. I'm sure there are many girls here who can empathise with how you feel.

There's a good book called "Fertility and Conception" by Zita West that is worth a read. It's packed with tons of useful info and tips. It will help you understand better how your body works, and give you an insight into assisted conception. Many girls here have read it and praise it. The more info you have, the more control you'll feel.

As I'm sure you've heard, IVF is a bumpy ride. However, once you get going - with the support you'll find here - I bet it's not half as bad as you're fearing at the moment. It's only natural to be a little afraid of the unknown.

I hope you find support from this site.

Good luck with your IVF cycle. It's not the norm, but it can work first time. Lots of PMA (positive mental attitude) Pootle !!

Sandra x
Me 41 yrs old - dh 49 yrs old. ttc 110 yrs.
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11
Board Veteran
Posts: 3364
Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2004 11:35 am
Location: Lancs, England

Postby leigh » Sun Jul 24, 2005 4:12 pm

Hi Pootle

I am in a similar situation to you. Had iui in April with drugs and have now decided to go straight for ivf. We are having ivf in October. At the moment I am feeling ok and trying to keep my summer busy by going on holiday and enjoying good weather (except its raining today, boo hoo!)

Had a bad week last week. I teach reception and all new children and parents came to visit, I was so jealous of all proud parents with their lovely children, had sports day and there they all were again! Also came on a period so that didn't help either. Feeling bit better cos had a good weekend with DH but it's always there at the back of your mind isn't it.
Any emotion that you are feeling at the moment is normal, I think people who are going thru' what we are, go thru' every emotion there is. Just remember that in your down times there are always people on this site who know what you are going thru', who are good at listening and have the right words to say to make you feel a bit better. I don't come on this site very much at the moment but when I do there is always someone to help. Hope you feel better, take care and let me know how you are getiing on with ivf, when you're having it etc.

Good luck and welcome to site


Me 33 DH 33
iui April 2005 -ve
ivf in October 2005
7/11/05 BFP!!!!!!!!!!
Jake born 31.7.06, the love of our lives
Posts: 595
Joined: Sun Jan 16, 2005 12:31 am
Location: Yorkshire

Postby DebraP » Sun Jul 24, 2005 5:04 pm


We can't stop you from feeling sad and depressed but we can try to reassure you that it's completely normal to feel like this before tmt. We all go through MASSIVE ups and downs. OUr expectations are so high, many people wait for years and years just to get the green light. At every stage you hope the worst is over but the reality is that it never stops. The girls who get pg tell us that :) The best way to counter the doubts is to talk to others going through exactly the same thing. A problem shared etc. The wonderful thing about this board is it's full of women who know how it feels. Just knowing you're not alone in this can help so much.

Peruse the General Forum and look at the monthly threads, or the others which appeal.

Me: 44, DH: 31
Game Over.
Dates: Aug 02 - May 06
Tries: 5 fresh + 4 frozen.
Results: 1 daughter, 2 m/c, 1 ectopic.
Valued Contributor
Posts: 2784
Joined: Sun Nov 23, 2003 4:40 pm

Postby debbieed » Mon Jul 25, 2005 1:25 pm

Hello Pootle,
I guess everyone on this site knows how you feel. The whole thing can make you very depressed but can also make you feel very happy. As has been suggested - the main forum has LOADS of really helpful supportive people who are always willing to lend an ear or give some advice. Just ask for the help when you need it and I'm sure that someone will respond. Just remember that you may feel depressed now but tomorrow you make feel a whole lot better.
I'm sending you a hug to help too.
Take care
Age 40
Dh 42
1st IVF Oct 2004 -ive
2nd IVF March 2005 -ive
3rd (and final) IVF August 2005 +ive

Posts: 341
Joined: Fri Oct 15, 2004 6:02 pm
Location: South Wales

Postby Pootle » Tue Aug 09, 2005 5:47 pm

Sandra, Leigh, Debra and Debbie

Sorry it has taken a while for me to thank you, I have been trying out some of that positive mental attitude. It appears to be working. Your kind words and support really made a difference.

I started the IVF cycle 2 weeks ago and seem to be coping much better.

Thanks again and lots of love to you all xxx
Pootle xxx
Posts: 59
Joined: Sun Jul 24, 2005 3:13 pm
Location: Buckinghamshire England

Postby clair55 » Tue Aug 09, 2005 6:13 pm

Hi Pootle

I'm on my first IVF cycle too. Started stim injections this morning. I have joined august buddies on the general forum there are loads of us who are all on different steps on the cycle. log on and have a look.

Good luck and best wishes to you

Me -31
DH - 35
1st Attempt IVF Aug/Sept 05= BFN
Next cycle with ICSI, hopefully April 2006 = BFN
Hydrosalphinx being removed in November. ICSI next year. Last chance saloon!
Posts: 171
Joined: Sun Jul 24, 2005 9:45 am
Location: birmingham, uk

Postby Sand » Tue Aug 09, 2005 8:12 pm

Nice to hear from you Pootle ... Glad you're feeling a little more positive. Once you actually start treatment it ain't half as bad as you've been imagining .. Good luck with your cycle !

Sandra x
Me 41 yrs old - dh 49 yrs old. ttc 110 yrs.
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11
Board Veteran
Posts: 3364
Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2004 11:35 am
Location: Lancs, England

Postby Jeni Babes » Thu Aug 11, 2005 8:48 am


I am Jen, I have just joined the site and on my 1st IVF too. I am finding the emotions.... oh! so..... over whelming at times and at others I am as high as a kite. I have to keep thinking that maybe it will all work out in the end. PMA...


Jeni Babes

Postby NickiMark » Thu Aug 11, 2005 10:00 am

Hi, Your feeling are normal, I am sure every girl on this site has had them, thats why this site is good to vent it all out to ppl who know and truely undersatnd x x

It will work eventually. You have to have faith and hope in it, and a positive attitude!

I ve had 1 failed IUI just on 2ww for 2nd IUI now. I have faith that it'll work this time!! x x x

Hugs to you my dear x x
TTC 6yrs......Have jumped off the rollercoaster for now, too many BFN's and too much heartache, to keep going....Moving on to fulfil other dreams!!!
Board Veteran
Posts: 4504
Joined: Wed Apr 20, 2005 5:04 pm
Location: UK

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