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To My Beautiful Son, Connor Xzavior Amato

Forum for those who have lost their babies through miscarriage, neonatal or stillbirth.

Second Trimester Loss due to:

Poll ended at Sun Feb 05, 2006 4:34 am

Incompetant Cervix
3
100%
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Total votes : 3

To My Beautiful Son, Connor Xzavior Amato

Postby jamato253 » Fri Oct 28, 2005 4:28 am

My son, Connor Xzavior Amato was born on October 21st, 2005 at 3:03PM Already Dreaming....He was 10oz. and 10 inches at 19.5 weeks (size of a 20 week baby) He was born perfect with daddy's build and my nose. Today we laid him to rest at Wildwood Cemetary and I felt his presence there and I know he is safe with God. Attached is the poem written by his father and read today at his commital, I wanted to share it with all of you....

A Son's Day
Robert C. Amato/Jessica L. Amato

The miracle of your presence
Was a sweet essence
Daddy's strength Mommy's touch
Son's swiftness
A parent's gift is you

Today our fears
But not for your innocent ears
A wonderful sight
You saw the light
You gave your fight

Wonderful sight you are
Forever locked in our hearts
Never to be forgotten
To be celebrated, loved and adored

You are our son and forever will be
In dreams we will see you grow
From the heavens you will look down

For our tear's will never dry
We will always cry for you
Sky will be blue for you
We always look up at you

We love you Connor
A forever dreaming Son
We will always cry on our Son's day...

We Promise...
3rd IVF/ICSI June 2005 +ve Connor Xzavior Amato born 10/21/05 already dreaming.
4th IVF/ICSI Mar 2006 +ve Logan Tyler born safely 12/18/06

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Postby Smita » Fri Oct 28, 2005 11:00 am

Jessica,
Its a beautiful poem for a beautiful little boy.

Lots of love and hugs,

smita
me-32, dh 40
ttc 4+ years
4 failed IUI's
1st ICSI +ve 17/6/05:)
Baby girl Dhruvaa born on 14/02/06
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Postby DeniseM » Fri Oct 28, 2005 11:21 am

It's very touching.

It must have been a beautiful ceremony.

Just know, Jessica, that we're here. Sometimes you may feels so lonely and empty - reach out, we've been there too.

I lost my angel May 14 this year. Sydney will show Connor the ropes in their heavenly playground.

Hugs.
IUI twins ~ July 2006
IUI singleton ~ due Jan 15 2009
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Postby ogr1 » Fri Oct 28, 2005 3:13 pm

my heart is with you and your dh and your son..
i think it is the hardest thing there is to barry your child..
i have been so thankful for this forum.. you husband has written
the most amazing poem.

always try and remember that you are not alone.

i hope you know that you do have friends and we do all care
and share in your loss..


i found in a very desprate momnet a book
gone too soon the life & loss of infants and unborn children
sherri devashrayee wittwer

this book helped me so much.. i refer back to it many of times..

hasanyone perpared you for your breast milk that may come.
my milk came about 3 days after my mc. it brought me to my knees.
i cant explain the hurt that was so deep inside.
i wished so much that someone had prepared me.
if you ever need to talk you can e- mail me..

if you have tummy pains warm hand towels on my tummy help.
we werent blessed with our babies to raise here but we our blessed with our grandaughter
and all of our many adopted and foster children that touch our lives
and i am glad to add that our 6th grandchild will be born this spring!!!!
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Postby jamato253 » Sat Oct 29, 2005 3:37 am

THank you all,

Unfortunately i knew that the issue with breast milk could happen and I am still leaking....As I put it that part of my body didn't get the memo...Not sure if a miscarriage would have been easier or harder than this....The first thing I had to deal with is that my son was perfect and it was my body that failed....My cervix effaced much early than it should have and so next time they will perform serclage (they will stitch it shut) I had to lose my son to learn that, but I don't blame myself and I have nobody to be angry with...So I move on...I have read a couple books and considering writing my own as part of the healing process...I will be joining a group at my hospital to help others that experience loss....additionally I went to AC Moore today and bought a flag stand and some flags for Connor....So now at the cemetary where his little body rests is a flag with halloween picture on it (a cat and pumpkin) I also bought a small pumpkin which daddy has decorated and we will bring that to him tomorrow....These little things help...I celebrate his life and can visit him often...I still ache and I am trying to keep busy....
3rd IVF/ICSI June 2005 +ve Connor Xzavior Amato born 10/21/05 already dreaming.
4th IVF/ICSI Mar 2006 +ve Logan Tyler born safely 12/18/06

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Postby ogr1 » Sat Oct 29, 2005 6:16 pm

for me it hurt when my milk came and then it hurt when it was gone.

i think that it would be a great idea to do your own book.
and i am glad that you have found a group.

i have been told that it helps to help others..

the pumpkin and photo is a great idea.

i keep a photo of our twins and son in my bible..
along with our grandaughter that is now 6 months old..
we werent blessed with our babies to raise here but we our blessed with our grandaughter
and all of our many adopted and foster children that touch our lives
and i am glad to add that our 6th grandchild will be born this spring!!!!
ogr1
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Posts: 4301
Joined: Fri Aug 29, 2003 7:11 pm

Postby ogr1 » Mon Oct 31, 2005 10:50 pm

just wanted you to know that you have friends..
we werent blessed with our babies to raise here but we our blessed with our grandaughter
and all of our many adopted and foster children that touch our lives
and i am glad to add that our 6th grandchild will be born this spring!!!!
ogr1
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Posts: 4301
Joined: Fri Aug 29, 2003 7:11 pm

Postby NickiMark » Sat Nov 26, 2005 3:44 pm

I am so sorry, I had a tear in my eyes whilst reading ur poem, your babe is with the angels now. Love to u and dh xx
TTC 6yrs......Have jumped off the rollercoaster for now, too many BFN's and too much heartache, to keep going....Moving on to fulfil other dreams!!!
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Postby jamato253 » Sat Nov 26, 2005 10:45 pm

Thank you so much Nicki...Good luck with your test, I will pray for you
3rd IVF/ICSI June 2005 +ve Connor Xzavior Amato born 10/21/05 already dreaming.
4th IVF/ICSI Mar 2006 +ve Logan Tyler born safely 12/18/06

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Postby NickiMark » Fri Dec 02, 2005 8:53 pm

Thnaks Jamato xx It was sadly a BFN. Love to you xx
TTC 6yrs......Have jumped off the rollercoaster for now, too many BFN's and too much heartache, to keep going....Moving on to fulfil other dreams!!!
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