Hi peeps!
Not logged on in a while but need some advice please.
We are thinking of going down the Donor Sperm route, Can anyone give me any advice on how this works, whats the proceedure, whats the cost, what's that wait. Any advice would be great.
Thanks. Will look forwrd to hearing soon! x x x
Donor Sperm
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nicolamark
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1879
- Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2004 4:05 pm
- Location: Cambridge, UK
Donor Sperm
IUI using donor in 2005
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
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Guest
Hi Nicola
This is just a very brief overview.............
As long as you are fine, then you can have IUI with Donor sperm instead of IVF. THe IUI procedure is really simple - even less annoying than a smear test!
Costs vary from clinic to clinic.........ours is roughly about £1000 but that is for a stimulated cycle.....the drugs cost a bomb (I am on Puregon - which are one of the most expensive drug options - but I choose it as it is a very easy to use injector pen). If you have a natural cycle it is a lot cheaper........you will have donor sperm prep costs and HFEA fees.
As i said - a quick overview..........it might also be worth consulting your GP for a referral on the NHS there have been some changes making some fertility treatments more readily available.......can't quite remember the ins and outs!
Hope this helps
JenF
This is just a very brief overview.............
As long as you are fine, then you can have IUI with Donor sperm instead of IVF. THe IUI procedure is really simple - even less annoying than a smear test!
Costs vary from clinic to clinic.........ours is roughly about £1000 but that is for a stimulated cycle.....the drugs cost a bomb (I am on Puregon - which are one of the most expensive drug options - but I choose it as it is a very easy to use injector pen). If you have a natural cycle it is a lot cheaper........you will have donor sperm prep costs and HFEA fees.
As i said - a quick overview..........it might also be worth consulting your GP for a referral on the NHS there have been some changes making some fertility treatments more readily available.......can't quite remember the ins and outs!
Hope this helps
JenF
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nicolamark
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- Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2004 4:05 pm
- Location: Cambridge, UK
Thanks for ur reply!
I have booked an appointment now with the g.p so hopefully when i see her i will get some more information!
What's the condition that your dh has? not heard of that before, what caused that?
I see you have tried before, what happened?
I have booked an appointment now with the g.p so hopefully when i see her i will get some more information!
What's the condition that your dh has? not heard of that before, what caused that?
I see you have tried before, what happened?
IUI using donor in 2005
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
HI there
I would just add a warning that there arent lots of donors about (changes in anonimity laws from next year have meant alot have bottled out)
So try to b open minded about what characteristics are really important to you.
Have you thought thru whether or not you will tell anyone - including the child - its a minefield! We have spent 2 years thinking about it and are probably not any further on!!
Go to amazon - there are several v good books on the subject -ones called Helping the Stork which I recommend!
Good luck! Keep us in touch
cazx
I would just add a warning that there arent lots of donors about (changes in anonimity laws from next year have meant alot have bottled out)
So try to b open minded about what characteristics are really important to you.
Have you thought thru whether or not you will tell anyone - including the child - its a minefield! We have spent 2 years thinking about it and are probably not any further on!!
Go to amazon - there are several v good books on the subject -ones called Helping the Stork which I recommend!
Good luck! Keep us in touch
cazx
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nicolamark
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- Posts: 1879
- Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2004 4:05 pm
- Location: Cambridge, UK
Thanks for ur warning caz!
Yes, we have thought this through, I know its tough, I think yes we would explain to all and child inclued. I know its a minefield, its the same with anything what ever you decide, or whatever route you take you wish you'd chosen the other one, but it's life and once we have mad that route we'll have to stick by it, the main thing is that we are both strong and our marriage had certainly become strong in the last few years we have been ttc. We have spoken about this lots, and every time we always come out on the same wave length, so that must be telling us something.
I know that there are lack of donor's out there, but as long as the child is british/white I dont really mind about other characterists.
Yes, I have heard of that book before, a friend mentioned it but i'd forget about it untill you said. We definatly be getting it now.
Yes, we have thought this through, I know its tough, I think yes we would explain to all and child inclued. I know its a minefield, its the same with anything what ever you decide, or whatever route you take you wish you'd chosen the other one, but it's life and once we have mad that route we'll have to stick by it, the main thing is that we are both strong and our marriage had certainly become strong in the last few years we have been ttc. We have spoken about this lots, and every time we always come out on the same wave length, so that must be telling us something.
I know that there are lack of donor's out there, but as long as the child is british/white I dont really mind about other characterists.
Yes, I have heard of that book before, a friend mentioned it but i'd forget about it untill you said. We definatly be getting it now.
IUI using donor in 2005
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
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Guest
HI Nicola
I think my negatives were due to sheer bad luck..........just like when its 100% natural, its a big waiting game........also I have been really stressed and negative which I am trying hard to rid myself of as it is not helping!
Sertoli Cell Only - is sheer bad luck, congenital condition meaning that there is an absence of sperm producing cells from birth - we had a biopsy to see if there were any patches within the testes containing sperm - no luck......so here we are good luck with your treatment!
Any other questions feel free to ask!
JenFx
I think my negatives were due to sheer bad luck..........just like when its 100% natural, its a big waiting game........also I have been really stressed and negative which I am trying hard to rid myself of as it is not helping!
Sertoli Cell Only - is sheer bad luck, congenital condition meaning that there is an absence of sperm producing cells from birth - we had a biopsy to see if there were any patches within the testes containing sperm - no luck......so here we are good luck with your treatment!
Any other questions feel free to ask!
JenFx
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nicolamark
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- Posts: 1879
- Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2004 4:05 pm
- Location: Cambridge, UK
Hello again!My dh is on awaiting list for a biopsy as samples have all shown no sperm but the list is so long it will be arround dec04 - feb05, apparently.
We are hoping that if we get on another waiting list for donor that the two will come at about the same time, so for example if the biopsy shows no sperm we wont have to start our wait next year, and we wont feel as if we have wasted this whole year. But also if there is sperm I know that hopefully we can do an insemination with dh sperm, which is what we really want. Its so hard, how are you coping? How does your dh cope? We have good and bad days, I try to keep active but as you know we all get low days, I hate these days, I hate it when my friends visit with babies, they dont understand.
Anyway, we are ok, I think we are getting used to waiting now.I suppose we just gotta be patient.
Thanks for ur advice today.
Catch ya later
x x x
IUI using donor in 2005
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
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Guest
Hi Nicola
At least you have got the ball rolling...........
I know what you mean about the waiting, it nearly drove me nuts and you really do need to prepare yourself for them finding nothing, which we found really hard because it was the last bit of hope taken from us........especially after all the waiting.
DH copes really well, he is a practical sort of guy and looking at it from a really base perspective he said if it had to be one of us it is better him as I can still carry a baby and he can be involved the entire way through.......where if it was the other way around neither of us could get involved in the whole process. Do they have any idea why your DH had no sperm?
We do still have days that we are really down about the whole thing.....but I think that will eventually disappear into a fleeting thought once I am pregnant and we have other things to focus on!
Love
JenFx
At least you have got the ball rolling...........
I know what you mean about the waiting, it nearly drove me nuts and you really do need to prepare yourself for them finding nothing, which we found really hard because it was the last bit of hope taken from us........especially after all the waiting.
DH copes really well, he is a practical sort of guy and looking at it from a really base perspective he said if it had to be one of us it is better him as I can still carry a baby and he can be involved the entire way through.......where if it was the other way around neither of us could get involved in the whole process. Do they have any idea why your DH had no sperm?
We do still have days that we are really down about the whole thing.....but I think that will eventually disappear into a fleeting thought once I am pregnant and we have other things to focus on!
Love
JenFx
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nicolamark
- Valued Contributor
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- Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2004 4:05 pm
- Location: Cambridge, UK
hi again,
I see what u mean about it being better that way round, I guess so.
They dont know why dh has no sperm hopefully this biopsy will determine that, but he's healthy in every way, doesnt appear to be anything wrong, never had any illnesses etc....... It s very strange!
Anyway, I am having a bad day today, had a few tears!!
When will you know if you are preg? Are you doing a donor insemination this month? When does your 2ww start?
Good Luck hope you get you bundle of joy soon!
x x x x x
I see what u mean about it being better that way round, I guess so.
They dont know why dh has no sperm hopefully this biopsy will determine that, but he's healthy in every way, doesnt appear to be anything wrong, never had any illnesses etc....... It s very strange!
Anyway, I am having a bad day today, had a few tears!!
When will you know if you are preg? Are you doing a donor insemination this month? When does your 2ww start?
Good Luck hope you get you bundle of joy soon!
x x x x x
IUI using donor in 2005
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
1st IVF cancelled OHSS 2006
2nd IVF 4 eggs all failed to fertilise 2009
3rd IVF successful 2010 pregnant Miscarried early
FET negative 2011
ADOPTED DAUGHTER 2014
-
Guest
HI Nicola
I will keep my fingers crossed for you........you never know it could be a simple blockage stopping the sperm getting down.............has he had any blood tests for hormones such as FSH? My husband had quite a high FSH reading....which is not a good sign!
I'm injecting now of IUI no 2 (treatment no 3 as I've had an IVF too) will have insemination around 16/17 April, then the dreaded 2WW!
Keep in touch
JenFX
I will keep my fingers crossed for you........you never know it could be a simple blockage stopping the sperm getting down.............has he had any blood tests for hormones such as FSH? My husband had quite a high FSH reading....which is not a good sign!
I'm injecting now of IUI no 2 (treatment no 3 as I've had an IVF too) will have insemination around 16/17 April, then the dreaded 2WW!
Keep in touch
JenFX
oooo Jen - its getting quite close isnt it....cant believe it!
Have been reading your chat with nic - and I SO know where you are coming from
Nothing much to add - but just to say its a complete GODSEND to have this opportunity to hear other peoples stories and to feel that we arent alone. Out there in the "real" world...it sometime feel like everyone else just has babies at the drop of a hat - DO they know how lucky they are!?
We have decided to keep the donor thing to ourselves - DH says he'll find it easier that way - and I just dont think I want to make a big deal of it. I kind of just want to get on with it and be as "normal" as possible abou everything
The child wouldnt need to know until they were 8 year plus anyway (I dont think they REALLY understand whats what before that - do they?????) - so we'll play it by ear. DHs mum would be DEVASTATED if she knew our problems - so thats partly why we are keeping it to ourselves.
Who knows if thats the right decision -I sometimes think its the first TRULY adult decision I've ever had to make - keep wanting an "expert" to simply tell us what to do!
Anyway big X
Cazx
Have been reading your chat with nic - and I SO know where you are coming from
Nothing much to add - but just to say its a complete GODSEND to have this opportunity to hear other peoples stories and to feel that we arent alone. Out there in the "real" world...it sometime feel like everyone else just has babies at the drop of a hat - DO they know how lucky they are!?
We have decided to keep the donor thing to ourselves - DH says he'll find it easier that way - and I just dont think I want to make a big deal of it. I kind of just want to get on with it and be as "normal" as possible abou everything
The child wouldnt need to know until they were 8 year plus anyway (I dont think they REALLY understand whats what before that - do they?????) - so we'll play it by ear. DHs mum would be DEVASTATED if she knew our problems - so thats partly why we are keeping it to ourselves.
Who knows if thats the right decision -I sometimes think its the first TRULY adult decision I've ever had to make - keep wanting an "expert" to simply tell us what to do!
Anyway big X
Cazx
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Guest
Hey Caz
Good to hear from you........you must be so excited to get going again!
What is your final decision?? If there are no good sperm in the biopsy are you going for donor?
I am injecting Puregon at the mo......oh joy! so towards the end of next week should be DDay again! When is your estimated date for EC and DHs biopsy??
I will be praying for you babe!!!
WE DESERVE THIS AFTER ALL THE CRAP!!!!!!
Love
JenFx
Good to hear from you........you must be so excited to get going again!
What is your final decision?? If there are no good sperm in the biopsy are you going for donor?
I am injecting Puregon at the mo......oh joy! so towards the end of next week should be DDay again! When is your estimated date for EC and DHs biopsy??
I will be praying for you babe!!!
WE DESERVE THIS AFTER ALL THE CRAP!!!!!!
Love
JenFx
HI there Jen
ec in about 2 weeks from today I think
Quite -ve chat with doctor today - he wouldnt give me a % success rate for people in our situation using TESE and ICSI. So feel like hes trying to tell me there is no chance
We have a donor - which we will make embies with if no joy from DH. But I think we will freeze them for now - altho we'll see how we feel at the imte. I'm going to find it very very hard to get all that way and then have NO EMBRYOS to put back in
Feeling a bit spooked today.
Really just feel like I need a responsible adult to tell me what t do!
Started puregon today - (10mins ago to be exact) OK so far!
Hows everyone doing?
Cazxx
ec in about 2 weeks from today I think
Quite -ve chat with doctor today - he wouldnt give me a % success rate for people in our situation using TESE and ICSI. So feel like hes trying to tell me there is no chance
We have a donor - which we will make embies with if no joy from DH. But I think we will freeze them for now - altho we'll see how we feel at the imte. I'm going to find it very very hard to get all that way and then have NO EMBRYOS to put back in
Feeling a bit spooked today.
Really just feel like I need a responsible adult to tell me what t do!
Started puregon today - (10mins ago to be exact) OK so far!
Hows everyone doing?
Cazxx