FEB / MARCH 2011 Cycle Buddies!! can't wait!

[katieb1231]

Hi Ladies - I am here just being silent praying with you all for a wonderful outcome and sending you all the PMA I have left....I am just so down that I don't have a lot to say or articulate anywhere.....my DH told me this last 6 months has been pure hell for him (not in a bad way) he just can't stand to see me this way and feels broken & helpless poor guy I know he loves me & I love him but it is so hard to see your partner suffering and we have to be so private about it because not too many people know & we don't want to upset DD. We have our WTF appt next Friday & if we decide to do this again we want some serious changes....we are not interested in a "let's try & see what happens cycle" we want concrete evidence this has worked with other cases like mine, I know no one can give us perfect odds but the heartache is breaking me down little by little with each loss. Maybe I already had my miracle with Em & I should concentrate on that.

Please know I am here & fighting for each an every one of you to have the BFP we all deserve.....you are all strong unbelievable women who are all unbelievably deserving of this wonderful gift of motherhood.

[indigofire]

Hi all,

My beta is on Monday too Nicnad. We'll both find out on Monday. I too don't feel pregnant at all. I've convinced myself that it hasn't worked againn. I'm in a weird space emotionally right now. I just finished my last birth as a doula yesterday. I've been lucky to be a part of 193 births! So one chapter of my life is ending and a new chapter is just beginning. I start the clinical component of my 4 year midwifery degree on April 18. So it's bittersweet. I had hope that the last birth would have been a lovely one, but alas, medical crazyness took over again and coerced my client into interventions that she didn't want and the ending of course was ok...but the journey could've been so much different. I loved my doula practice, but I'm very excited to have more say on how things go. At the same time, I'm sure this cycle didn't work and so I'm really sad about that, but then trying to keep a semblance of PMA because there's always a chance. I just feel totally beat up. My best friend is pregnant and I'm super excited for her, but again it's a constand reminder of what I haven't been able to do. Ok...enough self misery. I have a 20 page essay to write. I got the first 2 done. Now onto the last one. Man essays take up a lot of time! Thanks for letting me vent! I know that you guys understand what I'm going through.

Nicnad - we too have one frozen embryo left after this. I think financially we're done, after that one, but I have put our names on my clinic's list for embryo donation - we don't care about genetics as we have our beautiful adopted daughter, I just want the experience of being pregnant and carrying a baby to term and breastfeeding and everything that goes along with it. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you that you'll get your BFP on Monday with me and we'll turn the energy around on this board!!!

Hopeful - Congratulations!!! That's awesome to have a first beta of 248. Get that progesterone up and keep that bean in there for the next 9 months!

As for the sex conversation, I was told no sex after ET until a positive beta. I sure hope once I"m pregnant I can have sex. I miss the intimacy with my husband. I wanna be 'with' him!

Blair - GREAT numbers!!! You'll get some great ones from 10 fertilized. Remember for those people out there who get pregnant the old fashioned way, (how dare they!) there's only a 20-30% chance of them getting pregnant every month. Some egss just aren't meant to make it. So having 10 fertilized is amazing! I'm going to POAS on Sunday, oh my goodness that's tomorrow!, so my hubby can be here to comfort me. I hate getting the news when he's at work. Not sure if I'll do it first thing in the morning, or wait til the evening? I have these essays to finish, so probably the evening. Otherwise I'll be crying all day and get no work done on my essays.

Crissy - yes all opiates, so the fentanyl they give me during procedures makes me go crazy, tears, hysterics, looking for little green men, thinking my husband is going to leave me, thinking men are hiding in the ceiling tiles that want to come down and get me, yelling at my doctor for being so rough, etc... It's quite the scene. Because my allergy isn't life threatening, they can give it to me, and then once the procedure is done, they give me Narcan (Naloxalone) which immediately stops the effects of the fentanyl. I just have more pain afterwards. I've been told that natural childbirth is my only option, which I would choose anyway, but losing touch with reality while trying to give birth would NOT be a good thing...lol. (epidurals have fentanyl in them). OMG I'm so glad that you're ok. That must be so frightening getting in an accident when you're pregnant. Keep that bean safe!

Ok, enough time wasted, GET BACK TO WRITING ESSAYS!!!!

Baby dust to all! Keeping my fingers crossed for lots and lots of good news this week!

[greekchick]

hi ladies hope u are all well im from the winter forum but been stalking for a while
im on the 2weeks wait i had my et last thursday which they put 4 back inside and now im on day 8 on day 3-5 i had mild cramping like my period was comingwhich was told could be the progeston , but nothing since i have sore breasts but been sore since ive been injecting,this is my 1st ivf try as hubby as a sperm problem i dont know wat i am expecting really im that use to having negatives im not gettin my hopes up sort ov tryin stay neutral... hope i have a good chance of this working ..any advise is good thanks ladies
i wish u all the very best....xxxx

[WeHaveHope]

Hi all,
Haven't had much time to catch up. I've been sick with a cold. I have been feeling quite miserable from it. I wish I could tell you that AF is finally here, but it isn't. Immagine that. All my life I've dreaded AF and now I am waiting for it like a Christmas gift on Christmas day. The nurse asked me to call the office on Tuesday if mo AF yet. They will then bring me in for blood work.

Sending everyone PMA and lots of baby dust.

[Addy]

Blair - good luck today, if you go with the 3 day transfer! I'll be thinking of you.

[blairwh58]

Addy- thanks for ths support and sending luck my way.

We actually woke up @ 6:30 and started getting ready since we would have to leave by 7:15...at 7:10 the nurse called said that the lab had left her a message saying that our embryos look "excellent" and we should move to a 5 day transfer. I'm sooo excited that they are looking great but am a little bummed that things are being pushed back again. So I guess back to work tomorrow, off tuesday, then bedrest through thursday. Plans changed a little but hopefully this just means we have some very very strong little babies growing. Can't wait to bring them home.

[WeHaveHope]

Blair-Congratulations

[BlissfulCS]

Blair- congrats on having beautiful embies and waiting until Tuesday to transfer. This is GREAT news! I have heard baby dancing prior to transfer is good too, but was told not to do it on a fresh cycle because of concern about damaging your ovaries.

Katie- my heart goes out to you again. I feel like I know exactly where you and DH are right now. I know we have all been there, but this last time was REALLY rough on us. Late last week I had a really rough day and was crying...he started crying too and told me he can't stand watching me hurt so much (which is why I think he is just ready to move on to adoption). Hugs my friend...I am so sorry you are hurting.

Indigo- let us know if you POAS! Keeping EVERYTHING crossed for you.

Nicnad- wishing you lots of luck and babydust for tomorrow. Remember- you just won't know until Beta and your symptoms mean zip, zero, nothing, nada. Stay positive!

WeHaveHope- hope you feel better and that you are able to get going soon.

Welcome to all the new joiners to this terrific group!

[to_have_fun08]

Blair - YEY!! Congrats on having strong embies and making it to a 5dt.

[blairwh58]

Thanks for all the support. Even though I was a little bummed that I woke up so early to find out it wasnt happening today Ive realized its probably best. I do have an update though. Since the nurse this morning didnt know the details other than that they looked "excellent" I called to get details. Of the 10 that fertilized here is where they all stood as of this morning:

2- 9 cell
4- 8 cell
2- 7 cell
1- 6 cell
1- 5 cell

[indigofire]

Blair - that is awesome news!!! By waiting til day 5 you know which ones are the strongest. So many embryos don't make it past day 3...the fact that you have so many awesom ones, increases your chances dramatically! I feel a bfp in your not too distance future!!!!

My hubby is coming home around 5:30ish with the hpts. I didn't buy any sooner so that I wouldn't be tempted. My bladder is full and I'm trying to hold it in until he gets here. I prefer to POAS the night before a beta so that he can be here to console me and hold me. It sucks finding out when you're alone. Or worse, at work or around other people that you don't want them to know. I still don't feel pregnant at all...and I know that can be a good thing. Who knows? The one thing I do know is that my butt is killing me from all of these injections. I can't believe how sore it is. 10 more weeks of this if I'm pregnant is going to be tough, but I'll put up with it. Heating pads here I come!

Nicnad - keeping my fingers crossed for you too! Are you going to POAS???

Let's hope this is a GREAT news week!

Indigo!

[Sunshine1576]

Crashing in.... Indigofire, I can understand why you would want to test early, I was glad my dh was there for me last October to when I lost my temper and "cleaned off" my cute pumpkin display off the console table. It's better when you are around your dh, because this is so personal and nobody else but us would understand. Anyway I'm over here praying that you get the best results and cannot wait to hear how everything goes, keep us posted! Sunshine1576

[indigofire]

Just peed. Negative again! It's just not fair.

Have one frozen one left...guess it's onto that one. Then I have no idea.

I hate this part of the journey.

[Sunshine1576]

Indigo,
I am so sorry that you didn't get the results tonight, you are so right life is not fair! There should be some fairy godmother someone like the babystork that can grant one simply wish for us, but you still have one snow baby left and it's certainly not over yet!

I am glad dh is there to console and comfort you tonight. Most importantly you should take some time to be with him right now, but you do know we are also here if you need someone to vent to as well.

Sending you comfort with virtual hugs,
Sunshine1576

[skatiedrew]

Could I be added to the 2 ww. We did our transfer on 3/26. Beta is scheduled for 2/9. Needless to say I've been doing the dollar tests every day. I've had cramping and sore boobs. What is the earliest anyone has detected their BFP on a home test?