Pheonixes Rising

[Lis]

Hi all!

Jen honey have a WONDERFUL time ! (as if I need to tell you that!) Will be thinking of you on Wednesday doll exchanging your rings, saying your vows ...... oh bliss! Looking forward to hearing all about it. You let your hair down honey you so deserve it!!

Souris will be thinking of you - what a rough time you've had. Hugs honey.

I am really sorry for not finishing peronals - will do mega post at weekend. Dh getting impatient as we are going to watch the Prestige shortly - he has downloaded it from the net (very naughty ).

Nicki honey thankyou for your concern - I am fine. I have had a very stressful week at work and I am really really tired at nights so haven't had the energy to do anything. Good luck on Monday!

Speak to you all soon. Bye to Miss jenbabes, next time it'll be Mrs Jenbabes

[gailp]

Hi everyone

Lisa glad to hear that your ok. I remember in the 1st 12 weeks I had never felt so tired in my life and felt I could fall asleep standing up! Have you started telling people yet and when is your next scan?

Nicki its all go for you now then, bet your getting excited. Good luck with the sniffing. Is your EC still scheduled for approx 3 weeks? I can’t believe that your ceiling won’t be fixed until the end of March, by that time you will have got so use to the hole that you won’t even realise its there!

Souris sorry you are having such a bad time at the moment, its good that you are able to fly back and be with DH on Sunday. Being there for each other is the best thing you can do.

Kate hope you are able to start you FET as soon as possible, its definitely easier the less people that know about it. How many embies do you have frozen? Hope your cramps have gone now.

MLG good to see you around, I have got 3 weeks until my due date, so I am getting a bit nervous now. I definitely hope that when she comes she comes quickly and in good health, I just can’t wait now. I feel as I have been waiting for this moment for ever.

Julie I hope your work has improved a bit, its horrible when it all goes wrong at work, you have to spend so much time there that all you want is a happy stress free atmosphere. Hope your AF has arrived by now.

Lucy its great to see you back. 3 weeks to go for me. We have almost decided on a name and will let you all know when she is born. Her middle name will be Hope though as that is what we called the embie when it was transferred. I to definitely hope she isn’t a 9 lb baby, it makes my eyes water just thinking about it! Me and DH are very excited, just can’t wait now. I think you have made the right decision to postpone the IVF, it sounds like you have been really stressed and as you say it will be better to wait until your stress free. Wow your going to be at the birth of your sisters baby, I can imagine that is going to be an emotional rollercoaster, but well worth it. Good luck with your job, let us know how it goes.

Jen I know you are away but just wanted to say I am thinking of you and I can’t wait for you to get back to tell us all about it.

As for me I am fine. Its fantastic not working at the moment, the weeks are flying by though. Time at home is going so much quicker than being at work. I am keeping busy though so I don’t get bored. I had to write out my birth plan last week, scary!! It seems a bit pointless really because it can all change on the day anyway. At the moment I am hoping to have just Gas and Air, however I have said to my DH don’t be surprised if I beg for anything and everything going! I have packed my bag as well, (bags actually!) I can’t believe what you have to take in.

[nicolamark]

Phew Lisa, Glad that u ok, was getting worried!!!! Do work know about your pregnancy???
Make sure u look after yourself and the little pip!!

Gail, Glad you getting on ok and birth plan written now, bags packed etc.....
Woooo, not long now!!! You'll have had the babe, before my EC now as dates have changed, im a bit confused actually!!

x x

[nicolamark]

Confused about schedule, can anyone explain???

day 21 of this cycle is monday, I start synerol, then.Then i thought the bleed happened, about7-9 days later, and then that was day1, and then the base line and then injections, and then EC on day 13-14
So i had worked out all dates, and told work what time i need off and now its all changed.

I have to use synerol for 22 days, and i do get bleed at 7-9 later but injections and base line isnt til 22 days later, and this is day1, so if i started bleeding, what are the days inbwteen?? and also why does Zita west say different, for long protocol????

Can someone explain???


My schedule is:
5mar-synerol
27mar-baseline
28mar injections start (day1)
4apr-scan(day8)
6apr-scan(day10)
9Apr-scan(day13) and trigger shot
11 apr-EC
16apr-blasto transfer
27apr- test date!

[Lis]

Nicki I'm exhausted just reading your protocol! Sorry I can't help, as you know I am a complete IVF novice. I'm confused just thinking about it! How do you feel about monday? Excited? I am excited for you - almost feel as if I am going thro it with you! I want to here all about it at every step without sounding too nosey!! xxx

Gail - glad you are well and looking forward to meeting your precious bundle of joy. dh and I have a boys name and almost decided on a girl's. The problem we have had with the girl's name is that our top 3 have all been used up over the years that we have been trying and with our previous no. 1 name, a good friend called her daughter that last year (and on the day of dh's negative sperm retrieval). A double blow but that's life I suppose. You enjoy your next few weeks of peace and relaxation before the mayhem!!

Jen - you will be skiing away somewhere on snow peeked mountains right now you lucky thing. Just wanted to send you a post in your absence as we are all excited for you! xx

Kate - any news on the next FET? Have you made any decisions yet? Hope you are having a nice weekend. In answer to your question - I have had lots of symptoms so far - nausea which has been much better this week, have gone up a cup size in the boob dept! , extremely tired, very thirsty and hungry a lot!

Souris gosh you have really been throught the mill lately. Hugs sweetie. How is dh after his accident? How is he coping with the bereavment?

Lucy - so glad you are ok altho sounds like you have had a rough time too. Any news on the job front? Its so awful you have to re apply for your own post - makes you feel as if you get no thanks for doing a good job. Good luck hun. You are such a wonderful sister to be there for your sister when she gives birth. When is she due? Before you know it, your time will be here to cycle again.

MLG yummy mummy nice of you to pop in! We have missed your colourful posts Is motherhood everything you thought it would be and more ?

Julie - how is our next budding young BFP phoenix? HAs af arrived yet? As you know I am an IVF novce - what happens once Af is here? Do you start taking meds then? Or do you wait til day 21?

Dh and I had a week off last week. It was all going nicely with lots of chill time till we learned that the MIL has told her sisters who we are pretty sure have told their sons and daughters, that we are pg with donor sperm! We are really upset with her - we are not close to that side of the family and to be honest they are all quite a cold and bitchy bunch - we specifically asked her not to tell anyone about the donor issue and we also told her not to tell them about our pregnancy til after week 12 but she went and blabbed I don't think she understands the potential consequences of what she has done. That incident unfortunately raised some upset for dh and me as has reminded us that we are still coming to terms with the donor side of things. Don't get me wrong dh is as delighted asI am but we both get a bit sad when we think that we will never see dh in our child when we look at him/her. And also that we will have to explain to our child how they were conceived, about the biology etc. That is not going to be easy but we feel VERY blessed to be in such a fortunate position and often still can't believe it.

My 12 week scan is on 27th March. So far we have told close family and close friends (of which there is quite a few) but haven't told the wider world or work. For that we will wait til after 12wk scan. We are also looking into buying more donor sperm from the same donor for the future. I know it seems odd to be talking about siblings but unfortunately with the current climate and severe donor sperm shortage, we may not have the option of further treatment if we wished that, if we don't act now. The clinic said if we waited 2 yrs or whatever, the shortage could be even more extreme and we may not be able to get tmt at all. So we are acting now to avoid a repeat of last years situation where we had to practically phone round every clinic in the country asking for tmt! Also it was important to us to try and keep with the same donor. I hope I have not offended anyone by talking about this (ie talking about siblings). Its just that unfortunately we have to think so far ahead cos dh has no sperm and the awful shortage problem. We can't afford to just wait and see how we feel. It is also at the back of my mind that if something awful were to happen in the next couple of weeks (I'm crossing arm, legs and toes now) we could proceed with treatment again in the near future.

Anyway I am waffling now. Hope all phoenixes have a good weekend xxx

[nicolamark]

Hi Lisa, good to hear from ya, sorry to hear that MIL has blabbed!!! I totally understand!!!
Dh is so up for this IVF but also so freaked by it, actaully soemtimes i think he's more afraid than me, and some time I feel like....OMG, I cant beleiev we are doing this, I wish we didnt have to, but we have to try it, or else we'll never know!!
Totally under stand how you and dh feel. we are feeling it that same, and still we are crying tears for azoospermia, its sucks!!

I am actaully more nervous now about sniffing!! Yes, of cousre I'll keep you posted, everystep, only as long as you keep me posted your end too, with your news!!!

Have you purchased your Donor sperm now then??

I'm off now, been out shopping all day, and now my feet hurt and i am actually exhausted! Just chilling out tonight, meeting some friends 2moro!

Love to all the other phonixes!!! Hope your having a good w-end! x x

[Lis]

Hey I know you know how we feel Nicki and its nice to have someone else who totally understands that although we are so happy there's still grieving to be done. Time is the healer I think ..... oh and a new baby who needs constant feeds and nappy changes!! I am soooo rooting for you on this one honey. I feel quite emotional about it actually ...... can't help but feeling all your hard work and tough decisions is going to pay off this time.

Anyway I'll head before my hormones have me crying and weeping!

[Julie2039]

HI ALL XXX SORRY NOT BEEN AROUND. TOO MUCH GOING ON AND HEAD FELT MASHED SO TOOK TIME OUT. (NOT THAT I HAVE HAD THE TIME!!!!)

JEN - Sorry didn't post before you left. Have a fab holiday, wedding and honeymoon sweetie!!! xxx

SOURIS - Sorry you are having such a tough time. Hope DH is ok. Take care of self. You know we are here when you are ready x

Nikki - Cant help I am afraid. I am bamboozled with my next stage of treatment. Think every clinic/ every person is different to be honest. Hope you get head round it soon. Just ring the clinic and mither til you understand. I do!! Good luck tomorrow hun. So glad for you that you are on the road to your BFP. x

LISA - Glad you are well. Sorry to hear MIL blabbed. Typical but guess she is excited. Hope you and DH are ok. As much as you are feeling blessed/elated I think your feelings are completely natural. I know a lot of friends who have had easy conception etc etc and are freaked out by being pregnant when it actually happens and you have a lot of emotions going on. Good luck for scan xxx

GAIL - Not long for you now! Can't imagine how you are feeling. Really excited and nervous I expect. Best of luck for a pain free short labour! I too have had lots of baby names stolen!!! so annoying! xx

LUCY - how are you doing? Hope ok. Hugs to ya. Hows the job?? Did you re apply...when do you find out?? Hope ok at your sisters labour. Will be magical hunny and put you in good stead for when it is your turn. May is just around the corner and Spring/Summer is the best time for a cycle apparently. xxx

KATE - Sorry about AF x Hope you are feeling ok. Best of luck for the next FET. Let me know what drugs you have to take and for how long as not sure I understand the FET lark. I thought I would need pills to thicken lining but have to inject again!?! You take care x

As for me AF arrived on Friday!!!! Thank god. Was typical as went away for weekend so might of known she would show up then!

Phoned clinic and have appt on 26 March for Buserelin injections. Very bewildered about that as didn't think would have to inject again with embies in freezer.....not sure how long inject for either yet but then get tablets to thinken lining. Prob mid April when have ET. So excited but soooo exhausted. They wont scan me either til on pills so hope the fluid has gone and gone for good!

As for the weekend away it was lovely but the house we went to was apparently haunted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! When we got there we saw a memorial cross in the garden from 1945 and 7 people died when a fighterjet crashed into the damn farmhouse we were staying in....if that wasn't wnough the date was 01:51 4th March!!! We all sat up last night til then to see if anything happened. In the middle of bloody nowhere and pitch dark - I am a wuss as hate the dark and the thort of ghosts so was a bit stressful/sleepless. Thankfully nothing happened!! Checked the net before and it was a german fighter plane, 4 crew and 3 people in the house died. WONT be going back there!!

Need another break now to get some sleep!

Nikki - we have simliar prob to you. Were supposed to be having bedroom fitted this coming weekend but chimney breast damp problem getting worse. Have to have the stack lowered and can't claim. Gonna cost us #600/#700 to get sorted and no bedroom til 5 April now. House is a state and clothes etc all over spare rooms. Ruining my Karma. Tidy house, tidy mind and all that.

Also, my auntie died (great aunt) last week and have the funeral this Tuesday. Work still sucks and pray I get BFP first time so I can leave after maternity leave. Feel trapped as can't imagine looking for another job and getting one with the IVF going on.

Anyway, off to see Keane tonight so gonna have a nap. (sorry for rambling)

Take care all. speak soon xxxxxxxxx

[Lis]

Julie honey nice to hear from you. Must admit ws getting a bit worried about you. OMG I wouldn't have slept a wink in that barn - good story to tell though on nights out! Freaky tho about the 4th March bit! Where about in the country was the barn? Sorry to hear about the bedroom - my sentiments eactly with tidy house and tidy mind.

Glad the arrangements are coming along for the FET

Enjoy Keane you lucky thing! xxx

[luby]

Hi Girls, hope you've all had a lovely weekend??

Julie - OMG you seem to having it all at the moment honey... oohh don't think I could of stay at the barn.. Where was it.? I am really into Most Haunted at the moment, not sure if I'm a skeptic or not really, I think I'd like to believe there is something going on, but like they say on the show things always happen when the camera's aren't on the particular thing, but makes good viewing either way... the barn though, I'd of been scared out of my wits.. you brave girl you..!!! I'm a bit like you on the job front, if I wasn't going through IVF I would have defo looked for another job but I just can't be bothered.. I want to get my BFP then look forward to MAT leave..... Anyway not long for you now hun, I too didn't think you'd have to inject with FET..... Take Care x

Nicki - How's you Hun? How's the house prob coming on? OMG your schedule for cycle seems a lot, sorry can't help I never did down regging, all I know is start injections on day 2 on them for approx 12 days (got for scans in-between) then go for EC... nothing complicated like yours sounds.. Hope someone can give you some advice honey... I can't believe you’re at this stage already... you'll be going for EC before you know it..! I will be keeping everything crossed for you... Take Care

Kate - Sorry it turned out to be Neg after all, I just want to say how strong and brave you are, going for FET again so soon, you are really are being strong through all this, I know we have to be or we hit rock bottom, but your braveness will pay off and soon you'll be celebrating a BFP you so much deserve... along with everyone else's questions, how many embies do you have left.? Anyway hun, you take Care... I'll be keeping everything crossed for you for your next cycle..

Gail - Any news yet?? Any signs your darling daughter is on her way into the world?? Hope is a lovely name, can't wait o hear what her first name is going to be... I bet you and DH are very excited..! Brave you going for the gas and air, like you say though it could all change and you'll be begging for the drugs going.... lets hope not though eh? and you have an easy birth (well as easy as it can be) Take Care hun..

Lisa - Hope you and DH enjoyed your week off.? OMG can't believe your MIL, that is awful, can't she respect your wishes? Obviously not! I'm sure it’s still hard for you and DH and it will take time but you will both be wonderful parents and have a gorgeous baby to love. I also think its great that you are already thinking about a sibling for your daughter/son, and using the same donor sperm is fantastic in my opinion.... don't be talking about anything bad happening in the next couple of weeks, don't even think that... everything is going to be just fine... 27th March isn't that long now, can't wait to hear how scan went? Are you going to find out if you’re having a boy or girl when you can??? You take care sweetie...

Jen - Hope the wedding went lovely yesterday? Was thinking of you hun, up that mountain... can't wait to hear all about it..

Souris - I just want to say I totally understand why you feel the need to have some time off the boards.. but just to let you know we'll be thinking of you and hopefully you can start treatment again very soon.. take care and look after yourself..

MLG - Nice to hear from you.. Can't believe Margarida is 2 months old already, bet she keeps you very busy doesn’t she??? Anyway you take Care...

As for me, not heard anything about job as yet, interviews will prob be in a couple of weeks... Lisa your right, it makes you feel like you have to prove yourself or something... I have been doing a lot more than my job description and if it doesn't get noticed when interviews come round, I'll be very miffed to say the least, but lets see what’s happens huh, I'll keep you all posted... I've been talking to DP a lot about our next cycle and I just can't get it out of my head, I think about it all the time, he said if I feel ready then go through with it, but If I don't then just wait a couple more months, but those couple more months seems like years to me.. I will admit I am a bit stressed out, but you think of all those babies that are conceived in much worse circumstances and I could be saying I'm stressed for the rest of my life... what if in 3 months I still feel same, am I going to put it off again...? I don't think I can do that... what do you girls think I should do, I rang my clinic to say I wasn't going though with it this month and I'd ring if I wanted to start stims in April.... do you think I should ring them???????????
As for my sisters labour, yes, scary huh? Her husband will be there too but she really wants me with her... he (Joshua) is due 15th May..


Love to you all... have a good week.!

Love Lucy

[nicolamark]

Hi everyone,

Just had friends over with their kids, ( 4 all under the age of 4) It's been a mad house, It was great, I was so happy and thinking I am so looking fwd to motherhood now!!
Now its silent, me and dh at loose end now!!!

Start sniffing the nasel spray tomorrow, I am worried actually, not worried but just scared of the un known and worried in case i dont do it right!!! sure i am being silly, and it'll be fine!!!!

Lisa, Are u emotional about me IVF? bless ya! If your emotional just think how i am feeling!!! LOL!!!
Hope works not so stressy now, 3 weeks til you tell them. do u think any1 has sussed your Preg???

Julie, wow, you dates are much the same as mine honey, we'll do this together!!! x x x
Your w-end sounded scary!!! But interesting!!! I love world war 2 history and stuff!!! where was the barn???
you're the same as me, I hate my job and waiting for mat leave so i can leave and not go back!!
Sorry to hear your Gt aunt passed away, love to you and ur family for the funeral. xxx

Lucy, my mum always said to me 'if in doubt dont do it!!!' and i think thats true, its hard to know what going to happen in 3 mths or what ever, but at the end of the day it's your choice!!
I think stress does cause BFN but whats the definition of stress really!! why dont you have acupuncture/reflexolgy/massage etc..... for this month and then start, try to work less hours, maybe book some w-end's away with dh, have a city break to Barcelona, Milan or some where warm, and then start IVF....... sod work!!!
And remember IVF works best in the spring!! Spring time is the season for growing!!!!
and also if you start in April, your'll be with me and Julie to hold your hand through it!!! x x x GOOD LUCK!!!!

[Kate21]

Hi Girls,

Just a quickie as I am meant to be teaching!!

Nickie - don't worry about the sniffing, you'll get the hang of soon enough. I had to do it for my first IVF and worried all the time about whether it was doing what it should be, all I do remember is the awful taste when it used to go down the back of my throat!! For my second IVF I had to do injections instead - not sure what was worse! As for your schedule, I 'm tryong to remember what mine was like, I know it took about 5/6wks in total (I think!!). You will get AF after about 7-10 days and then I had to continue with the spray (but a reduced amount) and have the injections at the same time. Think I had about 3 scans during that time, but the first one was about 4/5 days after starting the injections. Good luck with it all, your BFP will be here soon!

Julie - scarey spiders!! Not sure whether I believe in ghosts and all that but it doesn't make it any less scarey!! I agree with you on the job front, I keep thinking about changing jobs but at the end if the day its easier in this place what with the IVF etc. As for the drugs I took for my FET, nothing until a few days before I ovulated (I had to inject with ovutrelle to bring on ovulation). I had to take those wonderful suppositries and also a steriod called prednisolone which is meant to help with NKC. I haven't been tested for them but the clinic thought it might help with implantation. Hope that helps?

Lucy - hope the job thing isn't too bad. I agree with Nickie about your tmt, go with your gut feeling. If it doesn't feel right then don't do it. In 3mths time things around you may still be the same but you may feel stronger and more able to cope. Just see how you feel, you'll know when its right to start tmt again.

Gail - can't believe you've only got 3 wks to go, where has that time gone? Names are a nightmare aren't they? Working in school just makes it even harder because every name someone comes up with I think 'no, that child was horrible' or 'no, that reminds me of that nasty little boy'!! We do have a girl at school called Hope tho and she is lovely!

Lisa - sorry to hear about MIL, guess she's just excited? Its a bit nasty about her telling all about the donor sperm tho, there really is no need for that. How does she think that will help you and DH, surely its just going to make things more awkward? Good luck with the forthcoming tmt tho

Hi to anyone I have missed.

As for me, I have decided that I'm not going to do another FET straight away. Its mainly because of the timing and if I do it in April (which was the plan) I would have to come back to work almost straight after the transfer. DH thinks I did too much during the last FET and wants me to do absolutely nothing until the HPT. So bearing that in mind, and the fact that this will be our last attempt, I think I will look to do it in July so that I will have broken up from work and can do nothing! Am trying to stay positive for this attempt but if it doesn't then we will have to look at other options, possibly adoption. DH's sister has offered to be a surrogate but I think she is too old as she is nearly 40. Does anyone know if this is true?

Right, really should sort my class out!! Have a good day

Kate

[gailp]

Nicki hope you have sorted out your schedule. All I can remember about mine was that it wasn’t as rigid as yours sounds, I had quite a few scans and depending on what size the follies were depended on how much longer I had to inject for. I never knew for sure what time to book off work until a couple of days before which wasn’t easy, but I use to guess and then change it if necessary. I sniffed when I had my IUI’s and I do remember that you get a strange taste at the back of your throat, you will be fine though.

Lisa I have just realised that we have the same ticker! We must have a thing for elephants! Baby names are a real problem aren’t they. I have been quite luck with girls names but if we had been having a boy my top name which was Jack was used by my ex husband in October, definitely wouldn’t have wanted to use the same name. I can’t believe what your MIL has done, some people just can’t think before opening their mouth. Arrrrr. Your baby may not have been conceived with DH sperm but I bet as baby grows older she will pick up a lot of his mannerisms, the ones you love and hate! I understand about being blessed and still not believing it, I still don’t believe it sometimes then I catch a glance of myself in the mirror and I really believe it then, my tummy is huge. I don’t blame you trying to sort out the sperm donor for your next baby, have you get any left at all?

Julie I had 3 FET’s altogether and the first 2 I had to inject and take tablets and pessaries. However the 3rd one the only medication I took was clomid to make sure I ovulated. Good luck with the appointment on the 26th March. Scary staying in a haunted house, im not surprised you didn’t get much sleep. Definitely a story to tell your children when you get that BFP. Sorry to hear about your Auntie, hope the funeral goes as well as can be expected. Sending a big hug your way ((((())))).

Lucy no news from me yet, I am dreading my waters breaking in public, how embarrassing would that be! I have also hired a Tens machine for the pain, so that and gas and air may be ok, there again maybe not! I don’t know what to advise about when to start your next cycle, I know its all so hard for you. I know Nicki said that why don’t you try acupuncture/reflexology/massage this month to help with relaxing and stress and then start after that.

Kate I don’t blame you dealing your FET until the school holidays at least that way you can do as little or as much as you want without feeling the pressure of work. I don’t know about surrogate’s I am afraid but that is really nice of DH’s sister offering to help. Hope your class aren’t too rowdy!

Hi to everyone else

[Julie2039]

Hi girlies

Keane were FAB!!! Much better than I expected. Loved it….You know when you go to a concert and you just HAVE to stand up and dance and you get the couple behind you tutting and sighing because they can’t see/?!! Well that happened to me last night and on the way out it turned out to be a solicitor from my department! I was telling the girls this morning and I bet he was telling others about this nutty woman blocking his view and it turned out to be me!! Mad small world!

The place we stayed at weekend is Dunnington Lodge Elvington near York. Pop it in a search engine and have a read….still can’t believe a) it was apparently haunted and b) it was the anniversary weekend….and yes I am knackered!

Nikki – hows the nasal spray? Have you done it yet? I too would worry I was doing it wrong, not enough, breathing too soon, coughing it out etc etc so totally understand!

Gail/Kate – thanks for the info re FET. Think everyone/clinics are different. Will just take it in my stride and mither if I don’t understand! Hope you have feet up Gail and hope you are ok Kate with the July thing x Best all round me thinks x

Lucy – Any nearer deciding hun? You really have to do what is best for you and be as stress free/relaxed as you can be. Hope you come to a decision. As for ghosts I am unsure. I am such a wuss I am too scared to say out loud that I don’t believe on chance one haunts me and I then see one!! Loon. I have always believed in “something” just not sure exactly what.

Lis – Hope you are well. Are you having sickness or anything…? Take it easy chick x

Hi to everyone else xxx

[Julie2039]

PS MY FRIEND MANAGED TO GET ME A TAKE THAT TICKET!!!!!