May,
I'm so so sorry to hear your news.
Wish I was around in person to give you a hug..
smita
My heart is broken
May I am so so sorry, I cant imagine the pain and grief you must be going through at the moment. My heart goes out to you.
me 38 DH 43 TTC 7.5 yrs. 1st IVF June 05 ended in severe OHSS never made it to ET. FET Nov 05 -ive. FET April 06 -ive FET June 06 OMG BFP
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May,
I had exactly the same thing happen this year - twice.
In August I had had my 7 week scan - fine, heartbeat, all okay - carried on feeling pregnant and great - went for the 12 week nuchal scan and BANG! Baby DEAD! There it was on the screen. I leaped off the bed wailing and howling and charged out of the room. I didn't want another scan because I knew what I'd seen - it wasn't anything like what I should have been looking at at 12 weeks old - and I just wanted to run out of there. Then I had to wait 3 days for the D&C, and I had to sit with all the pregnant women waiting to get scraped. Oh, Joy!
I wept and lost a part of myself - I really don't feel the same person today as I did a year ago before I went through those two pregnancies. I would sit on a chair and stare ahead of me in a catatonic state. When I went out I had to wear sunglasses come rain or shine because I couldn't stop crying wherever I went whatever I did. I went to see the counsellor at the clinic, and cried all the way through (and kept my sunglasses on!).
But you don't feel like that forever.
One day it lifts, and your spirit lifts again.
I know it doesn't feel like it now, but you won't feel like this forever.
Don't rush the process, stay with it, let it all out, and sending you lots of love,
Lara
I had exactly the same thing happen this year - twice.
In August I had had my 7 week scan - fine, heartbeat, all okay - carried on feeling pregnant and great - went for the 12 week nuchal scan and BANG! Baby DEAD! There it was on the screen. I leaped off the bed wailing and howling and charged out of the room. I didn't want another scan because I knew what I'd seen - it wasn't anything like what I should have been looking at at 12 weeks old - and I just wanted to run out of there. Then I had to wait 3 days for the D&C, and I had to sit with all the pregnant women waiting to get scraped. Oh, Joy!
I wept and lost a part of myself - I really don't feel the same person today as I did a year ago before I went through those two pregnancies. I would sit on a chair and stare ahead of me in a catatonic state. When I went out I had to wear sunglasses come rain or shine because I couldn't stop crying wherever I went whatever I did. I went to see the counsellor at the clinic, and cried all the way through (and kept my sunglasses on!).
But you don't feel like that forever.
One day it lifts, and your spirit lifts again.
I know it doesn't feel like it now, but you won't feel like this forever.
Don't rush the process, stay with it, let it all out, and sending you lots of love,
Lara