Heart’s Desire – Finding Strength and Direction from God

kildean23 · Post by **kildean23** » Wed Feb 13, 2008 3:22 pm

Thanks everyone for the congratulations! God is so Good!!! I can't stop thanking him enough. You guys have also been so wonderful with your prayers for me as well! I tested again this morning and the line is just as dark. yeah!! DH was very excited. He just kept smiling when I told him.

Mia: I can't wait for you to post your good news tomorrow!!!! You make sure you update as soon as you get the call.

Nicaliw: My husband likes to drink beer as well and has sperm issues. so I do believe that report. I wish he would lay off of it. I will continue to pray for him.

Chriss: You're BFP is on the way as well.

IndieBlue: My heart goes out for you. I pray for your situation every night. So even though he called and said he would drive you, did you actually not go to the meeting?

Cathann: How are the shots going?

Apdean23 and HRobinson: You both are on my prayer list for upcoming wonderful and successful cycles!

I give all the honour and glory to God for He is worthy of all my praise!!!!

IndieBlue · Post by **IndieBlue** » Wed Feb 13, 2008 3:54 pm

Kildean: the reason that I'm not going to the meeting is that I'd feel like I was getting it out of 'keeping the peace'...etc. I don't want him to feel like he's just doing this because it means so much to me (his words) and it means nothing to him??? He even said on the call this morning, 'if this means that much to you then we'll go tonight'...HUH? Our marriage is supposed to be a joint venture, not a one way street. If I go tonight, he'll just end up resenting me and any baby that is the outcome of this...right?

I'd love to go to the meeting tonight, but I'm just not sure taking his surrender is the way to go about it...ya know.

So would you go to the meeting/appointment? Would you continue with the whole cycle and just know that he'd be happy in the end?

sonu911 · Post by **sonu911** » Wed Feb 13, 2008 4:12 pm

My dearest Kildean

God is great!!
CONGRATULATIONS on your bfp.

Hugs

(Guess I am the last one to wish you, but its better late than never. I have this very bugging and slow internet connection...it takes ages to open one page.)

cathann · Post by **cathann** » Wed Feb 13, 2008 6:53 pm

indie ~ My two cents....I think I might go ahead and go to the meeting. Maybe DH is scared or apprehensive for some reason that you're not aware of. Has he said anything specific about NOT wanting a baby?? Maybe if he goes to this meeting it will help him make up his mind as well. Just a thought.

HUGS!
Cathann

kildean23 · Post by **kildean23** » Wed Feb 13, 2008 7:26 pm

Thanks Sonu911!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IndieBlue: I think you're doing the right thing, becuase you do want to both be on the same accord, but I just can't help it that I feel bad that you aren't going to do it. It does seem like he doesn't want to really do it but is just doing so to make you happy. I would want both of us to be ecstatic about it from beginning to end. I'm so sorry to hear that. I will continue to pray for you.

kildean23 · Post by **kildean23** » Wed Feb 13, 2008 7:30 pm

Cathan: You are right, he might change his mind once he goes to the meeting. It could be something that is bothering him. So maybe it is a good idea for him to sit in the meeting and actually see.

Indieblue: What do you feel the Lord is telling you to do? We support you in whatever the decision you make. Does he have to make a decision about doing the study at the meeting tonight?

IndieBlue · Post by **IndieBlue** » Wed Feb 13, 2008 7:42 pm

Well here it is 2:40pm and he's not made it home. I suppose he heard my irritation this morning during the conversation and he has decided to miss the meeting. I'm tempted to go on my own anyhow....but again, if he's not 100% on board then I just can't. I don't understand though, he even said the other night that he can't remember a happier time then when I called him at work when I was pregnant with our son, he said he could remember it like it was yesterday.

I am just not sure what to think of this....I realize I didn't marry him for a 'baby machine' but still, something that means this much to me and has put such a burden on my heart is so hard to just let go without some anger toward him. And tomorrow is our anniversary so I forsee a really rough week ahead with absolutely no celebrating this weekend

Thank you all for your prayers....I'm heartbroken. I'm happy for all of you and wished that I could continue with the IVF journey but for now I think it's put on hold indefinitely. I guess I feel pressured by age and the fact that I came across this wonderful study....I'm not sure I'll revisit the IVF option because of both of those factors. I feel like a little 2 year old, I just want to pitch my fit and get my way LOL

Well on to the rest of the daily chores. Don't think my evil side hasn't thought of getting in the car and heading to the meeting anyway....hey, I can use a sperm donor LOL (okay, that was a joke ladies.....I wouldn't do that!

)

chriss · Post by **chriss** » Wed Feb 13, 2008 11:24 pm

Kildean, CONGRATULATIONS love, that's awesome news! Good for you. God is GREAT.

Indie, so sorry about your turmoil. I think I'd still want to go to meeting. But only you can make the decision for yourself. I'm thinking you will resent him if you don't go? Maybe?

Mia, tomorrow is your day. Big prayers for you tonite!

Enjoy the evening.-chriss

Hope644 · Post by **Hope644** » Thu Feb 14, 2008 2:47 am

I've missed you guys!!! It seems to be getting tougher and tougher for me to log on.

First of all, welcome apdean23 & hrobinson!! So good to have you on this wonderful ride with us! WELCOME!! Let us know how we can pray for you and where you are on your journey and I'll add you to our prayer list!

Kildean -

GOD IS SO GOOD!!!!

Mia/MP -

Can't wait to hear your good news tomorrow, sweetie!!

Indie - I'm sorry things aren't going smoothly... I'm thinking of you sweetie... and definitely praying for you and DH. No matter what, remember the love God has given you for each other and take some time to celebrate that love tomorrow -

Chriss - Hi sweets - thinking of you.... how are you??? Why can't I keep up with your test day??? Help me!

Nic, Sonu, Cathann & everyone else - Hi!! I promise I'll catch up more soon!!

And to everyone~~~~

kildean23 · Post by **kildean23** » Thu Feb 14, 2008 1:31 pm

Happy Anniversary IndieBlue! and Happy Valentines Day to all!!!

waitingforMia · Post by **waitingforMia** » Thu Feb 14, 2008 2:37 pm

Kildean: Have you POAS again?? is it darker?? So happy for you hun!!

Hope: We mis you too.

Chriss: thanks for the well wishes today

I hope this is it too.

Indie: I think you did the right thing in not going w/o him. Though he might be happy in the end, I think your submission in the right thing to do. But don't give up on praying he has a change of heart!

Nic: Yeeah it has been a tough wait! But I have felt such a peace this whole IVF cycle that wasnever with me in others. BTW my dh smoked for years and he knew how I felt about it, but I didn't want to nag all the time. SO I just prayed (honestly htough I don't think I had much faith in him quitting.) And one day he told me he didn't smoke that day, and then it turned into a week, and now he has been smoke-free almost a year. He said he just felt like it was time to quit - like God was telling him he didn't need cigs. !! Praise God I was so shocked. SO there is HOPE!! Ironically his SA went way down after he quit smoking! But he works with lots of toxins so that is a given.

Alisha: Welcome! I bet you are stoked you are gonna be an auntie!!! And I hope God blesses you during your cycle so that the two of you can experience pregnancy together!!

Hello to all my other sisters!! I went to the clinic and am waiting for my PT results! I am already praising God no matter the results, b/c I know that He is in control!!

MP

kildean23 · Post by **kildean23** » Thu Feb 14, 2008 3:19 pm

MIA:

I am insane! I have tested three days in a row which the last one was actually this morning and the line has gotten darker and thicker so I definetly know that I am pregnant. Praise God!!!!

I can't wait to get the news about your BFP!!! I just know you are pregnant!

waitingforMia · Post by **waitingforMia** » Thu Feb 14, 2008 4:14 pm

Well girls the Re just called and confirmed what the stick said yesterday(Yes I POAS and didn't tell!!) . He told me "I am sorry to tell you your belly will be getting bigger." For you slow people out there that means I got my BFP!!! After only 8 years of waiting for it!!! Yesterday I couldn't believe my eyes when I looked at the stick and there were actually TWO lines!! Who woulda thought those things actually work!!! I just fell on me knees last night and thanked God.

I haven't told dh yet. I order him a daddy to be shirt and will wrapt it with the pee stick and give it to him tonight!! I am on cloud 100!! I never thought this could happen to me. There is HOPE.

Thanks girls for being here for me during this time. As I said before all glory goes to God! WHy He allowed me to get pg this time I do not know. But I will try enjoy every minute of it!!

Thank you for your prayers and I will continue to pray for each of you as you continue seeking your heart's desire and God's will.

MP

waitingforMia · Post by **waitingforMia** » Thu Feb 14, 2008 4:18 pm

I forgot: Beta 316 at 11dp5dt!!!

kildean23 · Post by **kildean23** » Thu Feb 14, 2008 4:19 pm

Oh Mia, congratulations!!!!

I am so happy. God is so good!!!!

Heart’s Desire – Finding Strength and Direction from God

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