Oct 05 Cycle Buddies

[lolajones]

Little R you tease!!! I will make sure I tune in tomorrow for the news - have you won DVD Viewer of the Year (UAE division)???? Hope you're doing ok - can't you hide your husbands passport? Or chain yourself to his leg like a suffragette?

Camilla, soft lass, we all want children on this site and no-ones situation is any better or worse or any case more or less deserving than any other. This is where you don't have to worry about not being understood. So, the 2ww for you my girl - I hope everything works out for you and you too stephanie! Also on the roller coaster - cling on embies!!!

Leigh I'm glad everything is progressing without a hitch for you (woo hoo!!! ). Still no symptoms then? You are going to sail through the next 8 months with all the grace of Darcie Thingy Bob.

Jen a la swagger - nice one, grow follies, grow!!!

Steph, how're you doing?

Thank you for all your supportive words n thoughts after my uber moan. Brace yourselves for more sad hi jinx. Dh took me a way for the weekend to try and distract the both of us from "Guillotine Wednesday". I've been reasonably chipper ( apart from missing X Factor) until drive back when I started getting quite bad pelvic pain and suddenly realised (again) that odds are this isn't going to happen In fact And my novelty chest is deflating. I'm back to work tomorrow but thankfully am not seeing any patients - good news for them and me, I mean the last thing you want is to go to the docs, tell your tale of woe only to be out cried by them. Not Very Professional.

Righto - thanks for listening to me yawn on. I'm off to scan ITV 2 for X factor repeats

see you tomorrow Octobies!
Love and luck and a Star Wars-like defence system around your positivity!

Lola
xxx

[Jen1d]

Need some advice girls.
We just did my injection tonight and as the needle came out there was about 4-6 drops of fluid with it. I don't think the needle was held in long enough and am now worried sick that something will go wrong.
I rang the hosp but they said it is probably fine and to call the assisted conception unit in the morning. Has this happened to anyone else and do you have any advice for me.

Thanks girls

Lv Jen x

[little R]

In a bit of a rush, but will post my news a little later....sorry Lola... didn't mean to be a tease!

For Jen, this happened to me the first time I was doing IUI. I was so nervous... was all alone for my first shot ever and trying to do it at work, so ended up sitting on the floor of the toilets in the office trying to figure out how in the heck I was going to get that needle in me. Anyway, I did the injection fine.. only to realise that I hadn't mixed all of the solution (water) in with the powder...HMM...half of the solution was still in the vial!!! ARGH!! I panicked ...called the doctor...he said NO worries, you'll do better next time. Frankly, it didn't make much difference. I also remember that once this time around with IVF, some drops remained in the syringe.
My advice...don't sweat it. You're doing fine.. stay confident and focussed. Trust your body, it will do the work. If you stress about it, you'll only make it worse.
Listen to the nurses..they have experience...I doubt that this is necessary to say, but anyway...worst case scenario...you will stim for one more day whilst blocking ovulation.

Much love... hang in there...you'll be fine

Hugs to you!

Little R

[camilla]

Dear best buddies

Thank you Stephanie, Jen, Lola and Little R for your kind words and understanding.

Am feeling a little more 'normal' now. Am going to have to make a start on the pile of DVDs.

Jen - You will feel tired whilst stimming but you're doing great. Hope you see some lovely big follies on Friday. I wouldn't worry about those few drops left in syringe, I don't think it's enough to make a difference. Xmas pressies wrapped! and I thought I was organised.

Lola - You've always been there with the funniest words and so supportive. I'm willing the next few days to go quickly for you.

Little R - What? What?

Stephanie - You've got a good chance with two blasties. Stick, stick.

Thinking of you Leigh, Anna and Steph. Hugs.

I think it's much easier to be positive and dish out advice for other people, as I'm finding out now - serves me right!

I think you're fantastic.

Lots of love.

Camilla xxx

[Inhale, Exhale]

Hello Lovely ladies of months past.......

(So glad that we are continuing to pretend it is October- may it live forever)

So, about me. Let me be frank- I am on a roller coaster of emotions. I am utterly devastated one minute and slightly optimistic the next. I am still mourning the loss of our little miracle and trying to look to the future. It is a long journey........... I look through your posts and think that I will be back there- the transfers, the 2WW, the feelings of doubt, but underneath the hope. I remind myself of the postives every minute, otherwise I could not continue. Thank you for your posts that remind me that I am not alone. We all want the same thing, we all struggle for it and have doubts, but we all continue to fight for it, because WHEN it happens it will be the loveliest moment when we hold our little ones. ENOUGH of this sap.....

Anna- thank you for your beautiful message, you have given me the hope that I can have a miscarriage and still have a miracle- maybe even twin miracles! Congrats & Congrats again!

Camilla & Stephanie- 2WW, what to say about that except may you sleep well and long to pass the time.

Lola- Wednesday!! Yikes-a- bee! Luck Sweetie!

Jen- Have no fear from the injection police. It will work out.

Little R- You can add me to the list of missing DH. Mine is on complete other end of country for a week and a half. Should we put their faces on milk cartons? Attention! Missing! DH with emotional wreck of a wife at home. Please return with big shoulders and strong arms in complete working condition.......... He, he. Will pass time by eating chick food and watching chick movies and reading chick books.

Lovely Daisy of a Day to All...........
Steph

[little R]

My dearest Octobuddies....

Well sorry for the delay, here's the news I wanted to share with the only people in the world who could understand.

I went to the clinic yesterday for my ultrasound to check whether all was back to normal as I was having a few pains in my right ovary. It went very well and the news was good.
I thought after the IVF, the hormones and the miscarriage, my body would take a while to get back into its normal routine. But it seems as if my body has a mind of its own . It is recuperating a lot faster than my head as the ultrasound showed that my right ovary was giving me some pains because it was already creating a little follicle...it's already 14mm so the nurse announced that in a few days I would be ovulating again. I could not believe it.... the doctor said that we should take advantage of this little miracle....she recommends doing an IUI if my husband is not around. She sounded very positive and said that sometimes having IVF can kickstart your body...she said I was pregnant and my body obviously "wants" to get pregnant again. She has heard of patients who get pregnant naturally after one cycle of IVF.

To be honest, on the one hand I am delighted and relieved that my body is getting back to normal again so soon. On the other hand, I don't want to get my hopes up as I have had to deal with a lot lately and couldn't go through being slapped down again.

I am not sure what to think at the moment as Steph has pointed out so eloquently, I am also going through the ups and downs of the emotional rollercoaster. The hope and the grief all mixed into one with the crying bouts leading to the "light at the end of the tunnel" phase only to fall back into sadness mode !

My instincts tell me to go with the flow and my head instructs me to beware as I have got to the point where I don't think I could cope with another setback. SO WHAT TO DO my friends

My DH says he will do whatever I feel comfortable with.... naturally he will be in and out for the next week (I really hate his job sometimes as it makes this even more difficult) and probably won't be around for the time when I ovulate which could be on the 16th.
The doctor has recommended that I come in tomorrow morning for another ultrasound to see whether the follicle has grown and that my husband come in for a sperm deposit (they would freeze it until I ovulate) in the afternoon.

Please give me your thoughts...as I really don't know what to do at the moment. Yesterday I was a lot more hopeful and positive and yet today I seem to be hesitant.

Please please give me your recommendations... your advice...

Lots of love to each and every one of you!

A confused Little R

[AJ]

Hi October buddies,

Well my good news for today is that I have terrible all-day sickness!!!! What a thing to be pleased about! It just means that everything is still OK although I am already wishing the actual throwing up would stop! Talk about contradicting myself!

Little R and Steph - hang in there, my thoughts are always with you. Little R what is your news????

Camilla - What a silly moo you are!! Of course no-one minds you having a son, as you can see from my signature I have a darling son as well. I hoped that it wouldn't affect what people think of me and it hasn't one bit. I also totally understand the want for only one child not twins. Having already got a boy, when I found out we were expecting twins I have to admit I worried a bit about how it would affect my boy and how we would fit our house!! We definitely need a new car as we can't fit 3 seats along the back (even though one will just be a booster). I was just not brave enough to limit myself to 1 embie. If I had I would still be pregnant with just one so it makes no difference. So, don't be sad or worry, we are all here for you, all in different circumstances and all from different places but all united by our desire for children.

Everyone else, good luck,

chat soon,

Anna

[Inhale, Exhale]

And these are the days of our lives.............

I am back to check on Little R's news.

My thoughts for what they are worth...... I had to really think about this one. My first thought was, it would be too early to add the emotional trials of an IUI and 2WW. Then, I thought...... wait a minute! If docs are saying that this is lucky break, then wouldn't I want to go for it? Would I regret it if I didn't?

I understand your dilemma, still mourning, is it too early to hope? But, if it were me, I wouldn't let an opportunity pass me by. If the docs think you are physically ready and you feel you can do it emotionally- then go for it, with faith. If you can invest in it with your heart- let it lead you.

I hope you can listen to that inner voice that tells you where to go and make the right decision for you and DH.

Steph

[camilla]

Dear Little R

Well I've read and thought about your situation and like Steph, I think if the docs think it's OK, I'd go for it. If you don't you may wish you had. We'll be here with you again and the IUI cycle is shorter, you'd only have to wait 2 weeks wouldn't you. Hope this helps.

Dear Anna

Thank you for your thoughts. I feel a lot more rational about it all now. I guess if this didn't work out we'd put 2 frosties back, if poss.

Love Camilla xxx

[lolajones]

Helloooooowwwww Octobers!

I'm freaking out, but in a low key way. My pelvic pains are just getting worse. No bleeding yet though. I'm not pregnant, I just know. Have you seen the Nov test list?? 5 billion trillion smiley faces and we all know what that means right? Right. You don't have to play poker to know its time for the sad faces ie me. AAAARRRGGGGHHHH.
Pan pipe breaths! Calm calm, cool wet grass cool wet grass. OOf thats better.
PMA withers after attack of the reality laser beam of doom! Kapow!

Little R - I don't know what to advise. First instinct was to say go for it. But. I know that if my test is negative I will have a break before any further treatment. Remember though - there is no wrong decision. Whatever you choose will be right and you will cope with the outcome because you are strong.
Steph - good to hear from you, you sound pretty cheerful. I think you're fabulous!
Camilla - hope you're resting and chugging through the DVDs
Stephanie - you too - how are you spending the paradise that we call 2ww?
Jen- those drops don't matter a tinkle, I rubbished my first Puregon pen thing. Its just practice and its not going to make a penny difference to your follies.
Leigh - fertility goddess - stay well - can you believe Maria got chucked out on Saturday!!!! ARE THEY MAD? The C Sisters?? Blimey.
Anna - uber fertility goddess glad you're enjoying the vomiting! May it continue?

Camilla - also thank you for doing my thread and all the effort you put into keeping the test dates up to date. You are a worthy successor to Debra (who we miss if you're spying Missie). Thank you

Well then - back to analyzing my womb tingles and checking my pants!! Woo Hooo!

Keep on keepin on fellas

Lots of love, Lola

xxxxxxx

[Jen1d]

Thanks girls for your advice. I called the hospital today and they advised me to continue as normal and don't seem to be bothered by this. Feel stupid for getting so worried now. They must think i am a paranoid pain in the ass. So off i go again this evenings for my dose of follie building.

Lola - It must be so hard when you get to the 2ww and i'm not looking forward to it either but its not over and you must try to stay relaxed and sane (i think you are maybe passed that though, haha only joking). Will be thinking of you on Wednesday, Big, fat positive on the way i think.

Little R - Go for it. What is there to lose. My DH and i were not going to try IVF but decided to go for it as we may have regretted it in years to come. Be strong and try. Remember we are all here for you.

Anna - Vomit away girl you lucky thing, it means your gorgeous babes are healthy and happy in there with their Mummy.

Steph - Big hug to you. We will all get there one day then the tears will be forgotten when that bundle of joy is in our arms. Must stop or i will have you in tears again.

Stephanie and Camilla - Are you managing to get some rest? Not long to go now, hang in there girls, my fingers are crossed.

Big hug to you all. I can't thank you enough for being there for me.

Love Jen xxx

[AMck]

Hi all, have got back from a wicked hen weekend in Liverpool, my but it's crazy up there! I was hoping that drinking buckets of vodka would blast my bl****y cyst! It didn't work but it was good fun trying!

Anyway had my scan today and was booked for drain and to start stimming on wed. Then I got home to a phone message that I now have to wait until Friday. No explanation just a change of day. I know it's only 2 more days but WHY? As you know I had my HSG on 1st March and ever since then we have had one delay after another....rant rant rant... I suppose if I look on the upside it means that if I need to recover I will have the weekend.

My nurse said that draining will be the same as a EC so not to worrry. As I haven't had an EC any advice?

I will start stimming straight after the drain so we are one more little step closer.

Lovely to see all your news.
Jen, hang in there. Sounds like your doing fine. Positive vibes to those follies, grow, grow grow...
Lola, Camilla and Stephanie, keep positive, hope the days fly by
Little R, I'm sure you will make the right decision, maybe the doc is right and this is a little miracle,we are here for you


Love to all

Anna

[little R]

Dearest Octobuddies!!

It's getting late here so this will be a quickie. I'll write more tomorrow.
Please know that I am thinking about you

THANK you ALL for your messages .
I can count on you buddies to give me the soundest advice possible! I think that depending on the outcome of the ultrasound tomorrow morning, I will go for it. I have been through IUI many times before and it's nothing compared to IVF....a breeze really. Here there are no hormones involved (I think, I have to confirm this tomorrow) as it's a natural cycle. My hopes aren't as high as with the IVF..... this is like a bonus shot... I will treat it as such. If it works it would be a miracle.... if not, well, I will wait another 4-5 months before beginning the IVF again (I don't have any frosties!)

MUCH love to you all.... take care!

A comforted Little R

[camilla]

Dear girls

Lola - I still think it could go either way but I know it's harder than you think to stay positive all the time, it's exhausting! At least you'll know by tomorrow and of course we are all crossing everything in sight.

Little R - Good luck, we're with you all the way.

Anna (Amck) - They should sedate you whilst you have your cyst drained, so you shouldn't feel a thing.

Haven't really started on the DVDs yet! Tried to stop doing anything in the house but short of tying me down it's impossible. I'm feeling tired today though so am definitely going now to take a rest. Have updated list - see I can't help myself!

Nes – BFP!
Inhale Exhale/Steph – fab buddy
Slcannon/Stephanie – 2ww test date 25/11
Leigh – BFP!
AJ/Anna – BFP! Twins!
Camilla – 2ww test date 25/11
Jen – Stimming
Debra - we love you
Ramo/Lisette – BFP!
Little R – special buddy - IUI
Lola – 2ww test date 16/11/05
Walshy - 4 Eggs in the deep freeze waiting

Lots of love and PMA and baby dust and everything.

Camilla xxx

[Inhale, Exhale]

October--woo- hoo's!

Sorry to ignore the rest, but this is directed at the one and only.....
Little Miss Lola!! Tough Love Time.

Someone needs a sound beating about the head with the PMA stick!
It ain't over yet soul sista! Besides with all of us crazies cheering you on- how could it not happen

Totally understandable attitude if being used for self preservation, but if just plain ol' givin up time- break out the kahunas built of steel and have faith!

Don't fret about the smiley faces - all the sad faces for this month are being posted on some other site that doesn't include the coolest chics to grace the infertility pages.

Buck Up! Cowboy Up! Whatever you like. Too American? Pick something else.

Luck tommorrow!!!! I am smackin you upside the head this very minute with babydust- with love of course.

Steph