The Over 40 Crowd

[Catharine]

Good morning All

Welcome Momma KK-this board in the past has been very active. Several of our regulars are taking a break I believe. In reading about your crossroads, my heart goes out to you. I'm not certain what your full situtation is, but I wish you and your DH all the best as you work through this to find the path best suited for ya'll.

Luanne-so good to hear from you and lovely the news you brought regarding your bundles of joy.

Yasmina-how you holding-up? any signs of the ms wanning?

Nicolina-I tried to post earlier about financing tmt. Check with your clinic as they may have resources available that you may not be aware of. My clinic has an aggreement with a major credit company.

I'm doing well. The heat got to me this past weekend. Just zapped all energy from me. Thankfully we got some showers last evening, bringing some cooler air into the area. DH and I just scheduled a labor day weekend getaway to Boston. Last couples trip before the baby arrives.

Wishing everyone well and sending out lots of PMA.

Catharine

[chriss]

Hi Luanne,

Congratulations! Very happy for you. I am still around, not posting much on this board tho... been posting on awaiting treatment board as those ladies are like me... not pregnant yet. Hard to explain, but I guess I just feel more in synch with them as I continue ivf treatments. Make sense? I am glad that you are well.

Hello eveyone, sorry I've been quiet, just doing what I need to do. I hope that you understand. I've been reading your posts and am happy for you.

[children]

Chriss,

Welcome back! It's totally understandable that you feel more like home with the girls who are in the same page as you. It is always nice to hear from you whenever you feel like posting here. It is very hard to keep the faith after few BFNs during ivf journey. This message board (whichever thread that you are with) does help us to pass the difficult times!

As you already felt by know that it is also not very easy for us preggos. Getting pg only marks the beginning of a long and nervous journey because now you are carrying a life which may or may not make it to the very end alive. We are advance aged crowd and some of us even experienced stillbirth before! Today I just heard that one of the pg girls in another thread which I visit also that she lost one of her twins at 8 weeks. This is devastating!

Catharine,

Sorry for the heat wave hits. But I am glad that you are doing so well with your little girl and enjoy your travel to Boston, a city I like a lot - I enjoy the night life in Harvard Square, you always have some music there which make you feel young and alive! Waking up in the Harvard Square and being able to walk to get your morning coffee and breakfast is very refreshing. I like also to watch people playing chess on those stone tables!

We just booked tickets to Montreal in Sept. We are also contemplating a Caribbean cruise in Christmas holiday but this will be only 5 weeks before my due date and we may not be able to make it.

MommaKK,

Good luck in deciding next step!

Tammy,

How are you doing with Andrew's potty training? I read somewhere to warn us mothers not to push the issue and it said it is much easier to do it when they are ready, which is to wait until the babies are two or older. We have not had a chance to teach Eloise to deal with her panties yet since she is bottomless all the time in such hot days.

[chriss]

Thanks for the hello Yasmina. Thinking of you and wishing the very best.
Hi everyone.

[babygurlsolages]

My first IVF cycle I only produced 4 eggs, 2 good quality and 2 didnt fertilize. Chemical pregnancy. Second cycle was the same 4 eggs, only 1 fertilized to only 5 cells by day 3. BFN. I never have anything left over to freeze to do a FET. I dont want to do DE, I dont think I could afford it, and ins pays for only 3 lifetime cycles. I have 1 left. What, if anything will make me produce more eggs?

[Catharine]

Welcome babygurlsolages-

I wish I had a simple answer. However, I only have suggestions based on what several of us have tried here. DHEA supplementation to your diet-it is believed to lower the FSH as well as increase the quality of eggs produced. However, there is very little scientific data to support such claims. Many of us also have used acupuncture in conjunction with tmt. This is to relax us as well as improve the blood flow to the appropriate reproductive organs. If you are a big exercise fanatic, it is recommended to slow down your activities as this can reduce the blood flow to your reproductive organs as well as increase the presence of free-radicals. Several women here recommended the book by Zita West.

Speaking from my personal experience, I had 1 failed IUI cycle and 2 failed IVF cycles before the one successfull one. I started acu [acupuncture] shortly after the failed IUI and 1.5 months before my first IVF. My clinic recommends at least 2 months worth of acu before entering a cycle of infertility tmt. I went to a chinese doctor/acupuncturist and herbalist. He was wonderful. He approaches infertility tmt by treating the couple, so my DH also went in for tmt. After our tmts we would be so relaxed. During tmt it was very common for us to doze off. In conjunction with the acu he also used chinese herbs. Many RE clinics may frown upon the use of herbs. In addition, I supplemented my diet with DHEA. This was easy for I had already put this in my diet to compliment my exercise program. I took 25mg supplement every morning. The word on the street about DHEA supplementation is that for best results the supplementation should begin 3-4 months ahead of stimulation tmt. Again there is not much published evidence on the use of DHEA during infertility tmt. I would encourage you to discuss it with your RE. During my stim tmt I added L-arginine supplements to my diet, the thought being to increase the blood circulation at the reproductive organs. But there is not much scientific data weighing in on this. In addition to the L-arginine I started to eat pineapple at least once aday, the thought being to increase the probability of implantation of the embryo after ET. I cut out as much processed foods out of my diet as possible, no processed deli meats and increased my whole grains and nut consumption. Finally, I significantly reduced my exercise regimen. The caveat to my experience is that I always seemed to respond well to the stim tmt. The first ivf they transfered 4 embryos-BFN; the second 5 were transfered-BFP, m/c 9 weeks; the last tmt 5 embies were transferred-BFP, singleton [girl] due Nov '08.

If I missed anything I'm sure some of the other ladies here will chime in to fill the blanks.

I hope this information is helpful and I wish you the very best as you make your decision.

Catharine

[children]

Hi all,

We have done the first trimester "ultrascreen" and the results came back normal in all the tests they have done (ultrasound and blood work which tested several enzymes and proteins). In order not to scare us, my ob's nurse did not elaborate about the percentage of down syndrome or any other genetic disorders. Since I am an optimistic person I would tend to believe that we may have another normal child.

Catharine,

How are you doing? Are you in Boston now enjoying the city life there? My M/S stays but a little milder now, I mean I don't throw up anymore, but most food remain to be unattractive to me and I am guessing that I have to live with this kind of mild food aversion for the rest of my pg journey. Too bad, nothing is easy and perfect.

Tammy,

Are you doing alright? Any decision made yet for another child?

Chriss,

I am glad that you are enjoying your summer holiday very much. We are not taking any days off this summer, too bad.

Everyone else, enjoy your life.

Yasmina

[Catharine]

Greetings All

Great news Yasmina. Sorry to hear you still have the food aversion. My aversions slowly disappeared. I'm back to a regular diet with the exception of ice cream every night, to get calcium--I hate milk, I try to eat a lot of veggies high in Ca content as well as vit.D but DH loves his ice cream, normally I don't buy it at all.

Boston is in a few weeks I'm struggling with bloody noses at the moment. I'm up to several a day. Yesterday was bad, a real gusher, it took awhile to stop. I was to have an ENT appt today, buth the clinic was canceled. I did get rescheduled for next week. I believe what I have is a pyogenic granuloma--aka a benign tumor commonly associated with pregnancies. I'd like them to remove it because the frequency is rediculous and the headaches afterwards are hard to endure.

Tammy-thinking about you as you are deciding on that next step.

Summer, where has it gone. The schools here started today or later this week. Can you believe it? I have an adult niece moving to town this week. She's fresh out of the Peace Corps. She's moving here to attend graduate school, a program in public health that will fill any deficiencies she may have before she enters medical school. We're looking forward to her arrival. I'm hoping she'll want to do some babysitting as well, once little precious arrives.

PMA to everyone reading this thread.
Catharine

[children]

Hi Catharine,

Sorry that I could not remember clearly your trip plan. A few weeks more, ok.

I am sorry for your bloody nose. I have opposite problem, I have this annoying stuffed nose ever since the beginning of the E2 stimulation and I thought that was because I was getting over a bad cold or flu that I got early this year or some type of allergy. Then when it has persisted for so long, I realized this may be associated with pg due to increased E2! I also have constant headache, although somedays it is milder than other days.

I hope your ENT dr will give you some insights as to how to stop the nose bleeding, that is annoying. Are you taking any blood thinning medication at the moment? I remember that my brother had this when he was little and he had to look at the sky while lift one of his hands up high (if left nose bleed, he would lift right hand or vice versa, I don't know whether there is any scientific reasons for that) to stop it.

[Catharine]

Yasmina-that sounded aweful, dealing with a stranger in your home with a new born.

I've had lots of offers of help from DHs family. I'm not certain how I feel about it yet. Time will tell. It's a control issue, I don't like being controlled nor handled. Someday I hope to grow up and get over it all.

How is everyone? Thinking of all and wishing them all the best.
Catharine

[children]

Hi Catharine,

I was kind of bothered by my last post and deleted some part of it - consider that was hormonal talk. When I talked to DH about that girl after posting it, he said that the girl was afraid of holding little infants, he might be right. Anyway, I should not judge her unfairly since I had never asked her to be involved in any demestic work, I could not blame her. It could also because she was just too shy to be involved in our lives.

I had my parent-in-laws to visit us right at Eloise's b'day and they stayed for 6 wks, that was great, I never needed to cook or do any housework while they were here. My PILs are the best human beings in the world, even though they had raised 3 wonderful kids, they never told/suggested anything to me as to how to raise our baby. Instead, they always asked how often/much they should feed/change her when I went back to work at 3 wks postpartum. After they left, I had my Aunt to take care of our DD. That was a different story. She was Ms Known All about raising babies, both my DH and I felt uncomfortable at times, but she was such an efficient and capable person (I also didn't cook or do any housework for three months while she was here), and we knew that she wasn't going to be here forever, we didn't mind too much of her controllng issue. We sent DD to daycare since she was 5 1/2 month old. In our case, I think sending DD to daycare was the best solution, even though it was heart breaking to see that she cried constantly and refused to be fed by the caretakers the first few weeks, not to mention the recurrent ear infections and finally we had to put tubes in!!!

We are going to send our second child to daycare also. But before that, we plan to ask our PILs (from France) again for the first few wks and we also will try to get my father and step mother (from China) here for a few weeks to visit. We intend to have them overlap for a week or two to enjoy each other's company - my father had been to France for our wedding and he liked our PILs a lot, although they can only communicate with alcohol, LOL.

Oh, I think I feel entering a better phase of pg now - still hate to eat, but I don't sleep 12h/day anymore.

Hope your nose behaves better.

[NY4thtry]

hi ladies,

i am new to this but would like to hear from those in my age group. I am 40 on 4th ivf #1 chemicla pregnancy. BFNs last two and now i am in the 2ww after transfering 4 "perfect"embryos.

Have always had good eggg production good embryos although none to freeze. this time i did acuouncture although not herbs as my clinic advises against.

as anyone had a similar experience and then suceeded.. if this doesnt work i am willing to keep trying but dont want to go to donor egg..

also i wsa pregnant 2x in my life when i was younger. i have always wanted to have a baby .. not having fun with this didnt think it wold be hard for me

[children]

Hi NY4thtry,

Welcome. According to your history, you will get pg one day for sure. You said that you have been pg 2x before but have you gotten them to term? If not, how long the pgs lasted? About your DH, have he gotten any biological children?

The reason that I asked all these questions was to exclude any possibilities of genetic defects that are not comparable with lives. Of course, your Dr. and REs could have already asked these questions. However, they may not have them checked until you would have recurrent M/Cs.

Many people at our age are advised to use donor eggs, some clinic does not take any patient above 43 if they are not willing to use donor eggs. However, my RE said it was all number game, if you are a good responder to fertility drugs, have good egg production each time, you should be able to have 1 out of 10 good eggs in average. Given that you had negative results before, it is about time to get positive this time around. Just wait and see.

Similar to you, I am also a good responder with a low FSH. I had tons of eggs (25) produced in my first ivf and all of them were frozen at cleavage stage (2-cell embryos). The difference is that I did only frozen cycles. Now, I used up all my embryos which resulted 2 pgs (1 live birth and 1 ongoing pg), by calculation, this is less than 10% good eggs.

I also had severe scar adhesions surrounding my tubes and my RE thinks that was why I could not get pg myself, although my tubes are not blocked, they had too many side tracks and sperms just get lost in there. I did belly massages to increase the circulation in my reproductive organs and yoga to calm my nerves during my ivf cycles. They helped me quite a lot.

I understand each individual has unique situation to deal with, I guess persistence is the universal way to success, I am here hoping your 4th time is a charm. Good luck!

[NY4thtry]

Children,
thanks for the thoughtful response.

no my first two pregnancies i terminated younger and stupid both times i was engaged but ended up not marrying the guy. i wouldnt feel so horrible if i actually had a child.

My husband doesnt have children either and it would be so wonderful for him as he doesnt have any family other than mine really.

The first two cycles of ivf i did the clinic recomeded genetic testing or PGD. the first cycle out of 8 embryos 4 were PGD positive and the second cycle outof 10 embryos 5 were good.. so i have a pretty good hit rate.

At cornell they said since my ratio had been so good the PGD did not make sense as it can damage the embryos.. cycle no 3 i had 4 embryos and this time 7 but he only wanted to put back 4 because they looked so perfect.. unfirtunately the other 3 didnt make it to freeze.. my beta is tuesday.

I did not have any internal issues although he did a hysteroscpoy last month just in case..

I am not really interested in the DE route for a number of reasons.. I think i will keeo going at least until 42

thanks for your good thoughts it would be great if this works!!

[children]

Hi NY4thtry.

Thanks for the info and I think that you are in good hands, I personally believe that Cornell provides the best fertility service - my RE was trained there too and he is very good!

Reading your history and I could NOT find anything that I would want them to do differently. I am looking forward to your good news. Please let us know your results. Are you a fan of HPT (home pg tests)? I always tested from the 7th day post transfer on until I run out sticks (I buy bulks of these stick online) and I could already see positive bands on that day, it got a little darker each day.