U R not alone with DI

[Polly12]

Hi there, Thanks Gargy for your thoughtful questions and answers.
I think i really was just having a bit of a nervous patch as haven't thought about those crazy things for a couple of days. Further to your great questions - see below

1. Did the unknown donor come with some medical information?
yes a wee bit, mainly if he wore glasses or not and what his grandparents died of, other than that, not much. It did say if he was a smoker or not too and if he drank.

2. Do you and DH have a check in system?
Yes we do, and we often talk, i guess i just worry about what might not have been said, sometimes DH is keen to talk sometimes he is just like, not right now (that is usually when something important to him is on telly though!).

3. Can you stay overnight somewhere near the clinic rather than drive there and back? Would you be happier with that or would it be better to come home? We can Gargy, just due to the cost of paying everything privately another expense of accommodation seems to be another couple of hundred dollars that would go towards our next IUI if this one is not successful...........but its a great idea and we will have 5 hours to chat and just be together and no cellphone coverage means no interuptions!

Thanks for getting me to think about the above things and put things into prospective a bit more:0

Tanya - how are you doing?

[TansRN]

Hello All
I have been so tired lately. I don't know if I will be able to keep up this five day a week night business. I am not getting any sleep at all. It is really bad. I am up during the day to be with the boys. I think that someone should just pay me to sit at home and be happy! LOL We ordered our sperm today. We had to pick out three top choices just in case it wasnt available. I am so excited. I am on day 2 of my stimulation medication and I go in on Friday for b/w and u/s to see how the follies are growing. Hopefully a lot and right on target. That is what we want to see right??? I am happy that things are going forward-so good so far.

Polly as I start this IVF cycle I am thinking about all of the same things. I am thinking the exact things that you are. I just keep thinking about my life if I do get pg if not how will I feel what will I do who will I tell first!!! I am so hopeful. I just dont want to be let down by my body again. I just hope that things work out. What does my donor look like? What will my kids look like? Will they be cute? I do understand your "thinking shallow". I am as well and I am not a shallow person!!!! I think that it is just natural to wonder about these things. I really do. Time is really just flying by isnt it? I had a reality check yesterday I had to talk to my boss about some days off for school and she was like when is it I am like not until May 3rd and she said "oh like next week?" and I freaked out. Totally freaked out I was like next week? next week? OMG IT IS NEXT WEEK-MAY ALREADY!!!! Oh sorry I just did it again. Its nuts though.

Gargy
I hope that you are feeling better as well. How are you doing? I think that it is great that you and DH went to the sea to think about life itself before trudging forward with things. That sounds lovely. I am thinking about doing that...only by a lake. I have no seas here! LOL. Thinking about you tonight.

[Gargy]

Hi everyone,

Feeling very annoyed and frustrated.

I got a call from my SD today. He has had all sorts of difficulty getting an appointment for the clinic, between that and day to day other life issues its taken about 4 months for him to get in. We are out in the suburbs and he is in the city, so it was easier for him to use the city location.

Anyway he turned up with a sample at the appointed time. Our FS had told him to tell this clinic to freeze the sample. When he got there he found out that the city clinic did not have a freezing facility. Firstly they advised him to go to another clinic a number of suburbs away. Very firmly he pointed out the difficulties he had getting to this particular clinic. In the end the clinic couriered the sperm over to the other facility. Apparently it was stored ok.

Now I am really concerned for the following reasons:

1. There has been no test on the sperm to see its mobility nor sperm count. Do they test this before freezing?

2. My SD did the sample at home. This means that it was sitting there for at least 30 - 45 minutes. Will this effect how many 'good' sperm would have been frozen?

3. I thought that the sperm had to go through a quarantine process. My DH said today - how can it be quarantined as it has been frozen at this particular point and will not change/mutate? I'm now lost.

I obviously need to follow this up - do I ring our clinic and talk to reception? One of the nurses? Or go straight to our FS?

I'm also ticked that I didn't follow this through myself - but I felt I would be too interfering if I double checked what had to happen. I felt it was between the FS and my donor. Now I'm annoyed. I'm really hoping my SD doesn't have to do this again in the short term as I didn't realise how stressful it was for him.

Any advice greatly received!!

[TansRN]

Hello Gargy
That is a terrible situation. I would totally be calling the FS and asking about it. It is a lot of time money and emotions to have it ruined. I know that sperm can live for a while but did he keep it warm? That would have helped. You need to go to the big wig to figure out what is going on and how it works. The nurses are great dont get me wrong, (I am one!) but for these questions I think that it would be best to express them to your FS if you can. These are big questions and you do not want to be put off by someone else. I do not know the answers.....I feel for you though and I would be frustrated as all get out about this. Call and get some answers to cool your mind. And eat chocolate!

[Gargy]

Hi Tanya,

I've booked in to see the FS this afternoon - DH is coming with me. I haven't slept much (but the house is clean!!)

My husband's step-father is also very ill and in hospital. This is causing all sorts of issues for my DH (and for me) because of things that have happened in the past with his family. Luckily we had a big talk yesterday and DH has decided we will go and visit. But it will be hard, we haven't seen anyone since the last blow up over Christmas.

[Gargy]

Hi,

Well going through this process is definitely a learning experience!

We went and saw our FS today. Apparently there was a miscommunication between our FS and our SD, which our FS was sorry about.

However he cleared up a few things. I'm writing this in case it helps someone else (and to ease my own panic).

1. You have one hour before sperm starts to deteriorate.

2. The sample was used for a 'sperm wash'. This means that they test the mobility and sperm count. Our SD's was 'pretty good'.

3. The sperm will be frozen for 6 months. Our SD also has to give 3 more samples, also to be frozen. Then he will do another blood test before we get underway.

4. We still have to go through the counselling process - to be organised for later.

5. Our SD can still pull out of the agreement up until we defrost the sperm.

Whew! Huge sigh of relief! Now we just have to sort out the family thing...

Tanya - thank you so much for responding. Your objective point of view helped immensely. Hope you are feeling less tired now. How went the tests?

Polly - I'm surprised about the lack of information. With ours we were told that one was deaf in one ear (etc). I suppose it was voluntary, but I thought you would get a bit more.

Hope things are going well with you too.

Take care!

Gargy

[TansRN]

Hello Guys
Well I had an u/s after 4 days on the stimulation meds and I had 8 follies less than 9mm and 4 that were about 10-12mm. That was on Friday and I go in this morning at 7:30 am to see what is going on. I am having a smooth day at work. It is nurses week and the hospital is celebrating with all kinds of activities. Fun. Anyhow I will post more about retrieval and stuff when i get back today.

Gargy
That is some good information that you got. I am soo happy that your clinic cleared things up. You must feel so good because you are "doing" something with regards to your fertility ya know? At least things are moving for you. That is great.

Polly
Thinking about you and hoping that things are going well for you.

EC/ET are not far away for me now!!!!

[Polly12]

Hi Gargy,
Im so pleased you got so much helpful information to clear up any misunderstanding and confusion you have! It sounds like things are going well and that KD has some good swimmers which is such a blessing aye. Onwards and upwards for you all:) He certainly is a very very special friend, you are so lucky to have someone so amazing in your lives.

Re the family thing........i couldn't understand more:) we have a very estranged relationship with my FIL - hubby talks to him occasionally but i know he thinks im the daughter-in-law from hell and i have a had a blow up with him 4 days before our wedding! He has told DH he will write him out of his will (he is a millionaire several times over) if i dont' sign prenups etc (and we had been married for 2 years at this stage!) he is manipulative and tries to buy love. My parents can't stand him, he ruined our wedding day and if i never see him or my Step MIL it would still be too soon. He has bought so much misery into our lives and our marriage. But i know where you are coming from our visiting and also sometimes there is a point where "water under the bridge" has to come into it. I heard something very gross but true the other day and i promised i wouldn't repeat it but i will - you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your inlaws! On the flipside my MIL and Step FIL are just the bees knees, i love them to bits, so its not all bad, but i wish you luck with dealing with your families.

Tanya,
Fantastic things are moving ahead for you now. I must admit my ignorance and since im not using meds i don't understand everything you wrote about. Its 8 follies less than 9mm good? And when you say you go this morning - is that for another U/S - from this do they know if the meds are working? EC = Egg collection? and ET???? So i am right in you are doing IVF where as Gargy and i are doing IUI? Sorry just wanted to make sure im on the right page.

[TansRN]

Hello Guys
I just got my call!!!!!! I had about 18-20 follies that measured about 16-20mm's and my one ovar was on top of the other one again. So it was hard to visualize. I think that it is because you have to stand on your head to lay on that table-what do they think is going to happen???I trigger tonight at 9pm and I go in on Sunday at 8:30 AM. The ER will be 9:00am Sunday! I am high risk for OHSS so I have to have IV Hespan (hetastarch) to pull the fluid off. I have to have an IV infusion on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday! I have never had this before but I am bloated as all get out so I am hoping that it works. It is supposed to help you get rid of water so you don't go into overload. Sounds good to me. Then on Tuesday I will start PIO every other day and suppositories every day. No estrace because my E2 level was over 2800 today. Yikes! I am also only doing 5,000 units of HCG due to high risk of OHSS. I think that I can handle it! I will go in for my transfer on Friday (5 day) unless they need to call me in earlier for some reason. My lining is 15.2 which the nurse said was wonderful. That is so great! I am really excited!!!!!!! WOOOO HOOOOO! Its happening!!!! Beta will be on May 24th.


Sorry I have been MIA-I am jsut so tired lately and crying all the time!!! I have been working a ton of hours and going to school. UUGGHH. Anyhow. I will keep you guys posted...

Polly
You are right about the IVF thing. I had to because it didnt look good for me to do IUI because of possibly blocked tubes. That is why I had to change. They like the follies to be about 18-20 mm. They say that at 16mm they are mature. ET-embryo transfer. and ER is Egg retrieval or same thing-EC-egg collection. Sorry for the lingo.

Gargy
I hope that you are doing well. Thinking about you tonight.

[Polly12]

Tayna - sounds very very exciting even though i don't understand even half of what you are saying!!!!!!!! sorry dont' know much IVF lingo at all. Just thinking of you heaps and hoping it all goes well.

[DonnaUS-NY]

Hi Everyone,
Sorry I have been MIA since intially signing on. Things have been so crazy lately and I got so far behind on the boards that I could only glance over everyone's posts without having a chance to post any replies. However, today Tanya your post caught my eye! Our IVF cycles are very close. I just had ER on Saturday and will be going in Wednesday for the Transfer. In addition to this, I also noticed in your history you suffered a miscarriage back in the summer of 2006, I was there too and right around the same time! Very sad time... but let's keep the faith things will be different. Wishing you the best of luck!

Anyway, I am happy for those of you making progress in your treatments and praying for those while waiting for a donor! I know this process can be very nerve wracking. Currently we are at the end of our insurance, donor sperm and hate to say it but looks like physically (due to egg production) as well as emotionally. In the meantime, I have sought out acupuncture as a suplemental procedure. Has anybody done/heard about this? So far my experience has been good. I guess anything can help at this point!

Praying and thinking of you all!


Donna
Unknown donor used for all below:
Ivf 2003 negative
Ivf 1/04 Frozen Embryo positive beautiful daughter born 9/04
Ivf 4/06 positive - sadly ended in miscarriage
Ivf 7/06 negative
Ivf 2/07 negative
ivf 5/07 trying again....

[TansRN]

Donna
Interesting about our cycles and history! I am really trying to be positive about this. I really am. It is so hard. I just want to know what is going to happen!!! Wishing you the best and glad that you stopped in....


Polly
Thank you. I will try to help you understand...LOL Glad that you are around. How are things going for you? I have thought about you as well.

Gargy. I hope that you are doing good. I am thinking of you as well tonight and I want you to know it.


Well I went for my second IV Hespan today and it went well. No big problems to report and I got the fertilization report. 7 embryos growing well!!!! I am so happy about this. It is looking good for me. I am hoping that we will be back in on Friday for our transfer of two wonderful picture perfect embies! They will not look at them again until Wed afternoon when they change the media they are growing in. I can't wait to hear. I hope that I know before the end og the day but she said probably not until Thursday. Thats OK as long as I know what is going on!!! I must know ASAP!!! LOL that is just the controlling part of me. Oh I also got a note from the RE to be off of work all week! Woo Hoo I am off until Sunday night I think! That is the best news yet I can live a normal life until then. I am thrilled because I am still sore yet. This way I can just relax through the transfer. That will be great.

[Gargy]

Hey everyone!!

Sorry I've been a little MIA - the last couple of weeks have been absolutely crazy.

The tonsilectomy went fine and I was all ready to go back to work. Then it was as if the universe said 'aha! You're feeling a little stable - try dealing with this, and this, and this!!'

I've already told you about my KD. I'm letting him have some space at the moment because he was asked to move house (his landlord needed the space for his mum to move in, and of course my SD left everything until the last minute).

Then DH's stepfather was in hospital. After much chasing and drama (and you would not BELIEVE the amount of crap DH's family put us through - not answering phonecalls, deciding to change plans without telling us etc) we finally found out the main issue - that his step father has lung cancer. He will be back down from the country soon. This time DH and I have a plan on how we will manage his family. And the good thing was that his GAD didn't kick in - which was reassuring.

Then the dog had a lump removed from his leg. The operation went ok, but the silly mad thing keeps jumping off beds and lounges, as well as chasing after the cat, which puts stress on the stitches. I And of course the cat loves being chased so he will deliberately come and make strange sounds and paw at the dog's face to get him to chase. The stitches have been ok so far, and the dog's got a bucket on his head (well Elizabethian collar) so he won't attack the stitches. But I have to keep yelling at him to stop running and jumping.

Finally I went back to work/school. Of course, this happened to be the time when a cold virus was hitting the western suburbs. So at first my lip swells disgustingly with a cold sore, then my nose starts running. I've had to have 2 days off and I still have a rotten cough (so annoying after taking time off for the operation!)

However, there is one good thing. I am learning to do picture framing at the community college. I did this so I can frame my tapestries myself. I'm also continuing the squares of knitting for my blanket.

Also my FS and I talked about the fact that it may be a good idea to lose some weight in the 6 months of waiting I have. So my plan is once I am over this cold, and back in the swing of things at work, I will start on this.

I am so glad to hear that everyone is moving forward with their baby plans, and have my fingers crossed for BFPs!!

[Polly12]

Hi Donna,
Im really sorry to hear your loss of MC - that is my biggest fear, i have my fingers crossed and i too have the faith that things will be different for every woman posting on this board in the near future (Arms fill of babies!).

I have heard many many fantastic things about acupuncture and although i myself and not using at the moment i encourage you to use it if you think it will be of help as why not? it can only be good and something new to focus on when going through these daily hurdles of fertilty can be a nice distraction.

Take care and keep us posted on how your new treatment goes.

[Polly12]

Tanya,

It sounds like things are going along for you in leaps and bounds which is so exciting! & embryos sound great.......Friday will be a big day for you, all the very best. Have they rang you yet to advise if everything is going to plan? Having that time off work will be such a blessing aye, just to rest up and relax, good books and vids:) Ive got all that planned for next weekend after my insemination. Then your 2ww and thing hopefully a BFP real soon for you. I also just really hope and pray this time you can carry your baby to full term too - i want you to know im thinking of you after losing your wee angel at 12 weeks, im sure you have some thoughts in your mind and i really wish you a peace in your heart and hope that your dreams of a baby are fullfilled soon.
Take Care and ALL THE VERY BEST!