The Over 40 Crowd

[Kat]

Hello
Just a really quick message to say hi from a very hot Singapore - having fun, doing loads of shopping - bought 2 pairs shoes & one handbag already tee hee - what fun!
Randa - sorry to see you're feeling premenstrual but it's not over quite yet - remember what that doctor told you
Sand - positive please please please...
Anna - have a lovely time in Ireland

Hi to Caz & welcome
And hi to everyone else too

Speak soon
Lots of love
Kat xx

[Kat]

Bev - Forgot to say - Dr Walker is Victoria - very nice & friendly & will put you at your ease - hope it goes well
Lots of love
Kat xx

[teachertam]

Hello Ladies:

All this holiday talk is giving me ideas I have been checking flights to Hawaii. I have enough frequent flyer miles for us to fly free!

Kat: Glad to hear you are having a good time in Singapore. I was there on business several years ago. I remember it being very clean. Be sure to get rid of all of your chewing gum. I was so paranoid about that, since chewing gum is illegal in Singapore.

Anna: Have a nice time in Ireland. I have never been to Ireland, but I want to travel there in the future, as I have some ancestors from Ireland.

Lots of luck to Randa, Debra, Sandra & Caz!!!!!!!!!! We need some ladies to join Jules.

Hello to Caroline and Lisa. Lisa have you started the "home study" yet?
We have had our first office visit with the Social Worker. There is a lot of paperwork involved with adoption!!

Bev: I just could not believe your doctor's response to you wanting to go to Spain!!!!!! He needs an attitude adjustment. If you UK gals could get donor eggs in a timely fashion, you would stay in the UK. He has to realize that. I don't know the cost in Spain for donor eggs, but in the US, it seems to be very expensive. My doctor said that it would cost us another $15,000 - 20,000 on top of the IVF charges! I'm guessing that is $25,000 - $30,000 for a donor cycle. DH and I just cannot afford this cost. I checked into the donor embryo option. This sounds good, as it is about 1/3 of the cost of an IVF cycle. Unfortunately, for DH and me you have to be married for 3 years. DH and I have only been married for 1.5 years. So, they said that we would have to wait 1 year and then apply. Therefore, we will not be going down that path. I guess we will keep jumping through hoops for the Chinese adoption and just wait until the end of the month for AF.

Have a wonderful Wednesday.

Tammy

Jen: I hope your Dad is doing better.

[Zippy]

Hi there
Im new to the forum having searched the net for some information on Menopur. Im based in London, aged 42 - had one IUI treatment and now at the start of an IVF cycle. I was a little perplexed today when I rang the drugs company to pay for the drugs and they informed me I will be needing 6 injections of Menopur per day for 10 days. I was rather horrified to hear this as my private doctors / Guys Hospital did not explain this to me!! Does anyone know if this is the standard? All my tests have been fine ie LH and FSH blood tests were normal, my ultrasound scans were fine for the IUI etc. I'm slightly confused why the dose is so high I only took 6 injections every other day for the IUI cycle of Menopur . I have rung to speak to the Doctor as I will be black and blue if I have to have 60 stomach injections and work will think I'm a junkie running to the loo every 2 hours to do them!! Has anyone been in a similar situation - any advice appreciated. I am seriously considering doing a few more IUI attempts now! Many thanks

[Sand]

Hi my surrogate-mothers-thank-you-for-taking-me-in Girlies !

I've posted on the other thread, but thought I'd put a quick note here as you've all been so supportive to me.

Today's test is negative, which is just as I suspected. I'll go through the motions and test again on Fri as per the clinic, but hold out no hope whatsoever. Today is day 15 after ET (ET = day 1) so I'm sure today would show +ve if it was going to work at all.

Thanks again to everyone, and I wish everyone the best-est of luck with their cycles.

Randa .... You're next !!! Only 2 more sleeps 'til we hear your good news !! PMA !

Sandra xx

[lara]

Dear Sand,
Sorry about your negative - I know you were expecting it and that eases it ever so slightly, but let's face it it's a drag, and I'm sending you my commiserations and positive vibes for next time. It's so hard for us lot, gosh it is!

Hi Zippy, the menopur six vials is what I'm on right now. You need more follicles for IVF than IUI, but it should only be ONE injection. You take two ampoules of injectible water and open them, suck up one and a half into the barrel with the big syringe, then open up the six vials of powder. You squirt the water into the first vial, mix it up, suck it back up into the syringe - then squirt it into the second vial, mix it up, suck it back up - then the third, fourth, fifth, sixth, til you've got all the powder mixed up in the water inside the syringe, swap the needle over to a small one, and whack it in your thigh. They should have explained all this to you - they really should!

Hi Tammy that donor egg cost is ridiculous, it would be cheaper for you to fly to Spain or the Ukraine for donor eggs - lots of people on here as you know have done that. I don't know if you'd consider it but it's another option.

Jeni, thank goodness you father has you as an advocate - that's what you need I'm afraid with the NHS. All I ever hear is about negligence and cockups. The nurses etc are lovely but the organisation is up the swanny. You have to find out everything and fight for it. Glad he's settled well in hosp anyway, and good luck with it all.

Randa have a fab time in Arizona, my sis was there in Jan doing a workshop. The states has such fab clinics and self-development programmes. In fact my DP's sis is there now.

Debra thanks so much for the happy birthday message. It was the birthday from hell, it truly was. We rowed horribly in the morning, and I took DP with me for my 7 day follicle scan etc because I'm so traumatised by the whole thing now after everything that went wrong last year. So I get scanned, and that was okay but not as good as my best effort, but I've got a few follicles coming on so not a disaster. So then the nurse suddenly says we can't go on with the treatment because we haven't had the blood tests for various diseases, hiv, hep b, blah blah and we were just stunned. It's the hfea again, they have got FAR TOO MUCH POWER in the UK. My clinic has fought these rules but now has no choice but to implement them, so right slap bang in the middle of my cycle DP and I have had to be tested for all these diseases, as if I needed the extra stress (and expense!). The trouble is, if you get an HIV test in this country you have to declare it on life insurance forms etc and mortgage forms and goodness knows what. Also, they could be positive after all my dodgy travelling in India and getting bitten by a dog and being treated in Asian hospitals and all that. I'm bricking it. So then I go home, decide not to have lunch or presents, too freaked out, and the guy I'm working with gives my what for down the phone because this is wrong and that's wrong, then a friend gets shirty with me because I have to cancel an engagment with her because of going to the clinic on Friday, and then my neighbour who's been a great friend through all of this phones me up and tells me she's going to start trying for her third baby - she lives opposite so I'll have to see her going up and down the road with a growing bump! I can't take it. I'm weeping all night, stressed and crying and I've decided to move house. Goodbye, cruel world!

PMA? I've got more negativity than the -ve pole on a car battery.

Lovely to hear from you Anna, have fab trip in the Emerald Isle.

Good luck, Randa, fingers crossed.

Lara xxx

[randa2006]

Lara!

Oh my gosh! I had to read your post twice and slowly in order to understand what you are upset about. Now I get it! And you SHOULD be upset! What a shitty birthday!^#*(@%$ (yes, that word was worse than shitty)

But at first (this might bring a smile to your face) I was laughing my a-- off reading what you wrote: "rowed" ??? I was picturing you and your honey in a boat and couldn't figure out why you were rowing or where you were rowing to. Swear to God. And "cockups" what the????, how about "swanny" and "bricking it"??? Over the past year I have gotten somewhat used to the slang you Brits use, but those I had not heard.

All in all... you made your point well - even to us Americans. You had a sucky birthday. I'm so sorry about those tests. That is insane! How can they just shut down your tmt right in the "slap bang" middle (we say that here too)! NOT RIGHT! Will this totally pull you off course? Can your plan be salvaged? Unbelievable!

Sandra - you are not having a good day either. I posted to you on your test thread about this -ve. I'll just say again, I'm so sorry. I know you are braced for another -ve on Friday, BUT... as others have said, they wouldn't be testing you again if there wasn't a reason. This has happened before and women have ended up pregnant (apparently). There is still hope.

Hi Zippy - welcome! And the help Lara gave you today is just the beginning of what you can expect from this group. Lots of helpful info here!

Hi Tammy - you are so smart to work simultaneously on your Plan B. Good for you!

Hi Kat - Shop til you drop, Honey!!! I hear that's the place for it!

Hi Jen - We have learned over time that you have to "manage" your healthcare (and that of loved ones) and assume very little as you go. I'm sorry your Dad's medication was overlooked. How stupid but how typical of the service of the healthcare industry today.

Well, I'm afraid to say it, but I'm getting my hopes up again. Normally, that migraine on Monday would have meant I should have started my period at least by last night and I didn't. AND, sex almost always brings it on if it's due within 24 hours anyway... and still nothing (sorry if tmi).

I still don't feel anything in my boobs, and I think if I were preg I would. But I also have quit feeling like I'm going to start my period. So.... ??? I'm totally confused. Don't hate me but I think I'm going to take an hpt tomorrow morning. Ya ya ya... I know all the good advice about testing early, but I also know that nearly every one of my friends on these threads have done it anyway. It's a bad habit but I learned it from you!

What a long two weeks!

[taylorjools]

Hello girls

what a lot of us there are now just dying for you all to come and join me on the other side I am the ONLY over 40 over there and I am 43 next month

so I have done my reading and do hope I don't make any boo boos on my catching up, and forgive me if I don't mention all personally, it's not because I don't care

Sand - sorry that your first test was negative, but good idea to go ahead and test again. I know I said it ebfore but on my Kiev board there is a girl who was pg with a beta of 5 and she took another 5 days to get a +ve hpt as they kick in at about 25 - she is now 20 weeks pg, so PMA sweetie, we are all thinking of you.

Randa - all is crossed for you too. My second pg had totally different symptoms from the first - no sore boobs til week 8 for eg. so you never ever know, plus your body will have evolved since your last one naughty doing the hpt, but I do understand, I did one a day early too, you just have to be prepared to hang on in there if it's a neg and you have no AF OK???

Debra - how you doing sweetie??? not long to go now, I know it's been such a long haul for you trying for nr.2, big hugs to you.

Kat - have a fab time in Singapore, I did an Asia pacific tour for a product launch (in the days when I had a career) - it was amazing, good idea to mellow out before your next go.

Jen - so sorry about your dad. My step dad has just had the same, a mild stroke, he didn't tell my mum for a whole week that his right leg had gone numb they've put him on loads of drugs but no physio, I am shocked but that's the NHS for you - my mum is fighting for physio for him now, terrible, they are pensioners so private tmt would be hard for them to manage. Big hugs to you.

Lara - what a rotten birthday, and you are right the hfea have too much power they are destroying the assisted reproduction service in the UK. I am shocked your clinic didn't check though that basic tests like HIV were up to date before starting tmt???? Don't worry about putting it on your insurance forms - when dh and I took out a joint life policy for our mega mortgages in the UK we had to have HIV and "no smoker" blood tests anyway. I am sure yours will turn out -ve, then it will reassure you. Hope you can keep the follies you have and see the cycle through love.

Zippy - hi and welcome. You have the info on the jabs now - not so bad. For the donor ICSI I have had to have progesterone injections for 12 weeks in the bum - which is just recovering now - so I do sympathise! You'll be fine, just think how much higher your chances are with IVF than IUI ( we wasted a lot of time on IUI when the clock was ticking Grrr), and as one doc said to me, compared to the birth a few injections is npothing lucky for her she was a woman with 4 kids or sh'd have had a sock in the jaw!!)

Caz - welcome to you too, anmd do let us know your test date so we can cheer you on. You have been thrpugh loads, as we all have on this thread, so you are in good company.

Bev - I pm'd you, have a good time in Barcelona!

Tammy - if you do consider donor eggs, then loads of US and canadians go to ISIDA, Ukraine where I went. Total tmt for us including freezing embies, ICSI, ALL my drugs, donor drugs etc was about €5000 Including a TESE operation for dh! IM comes in at around €10,000 for a basic donor cycle, and some other clincs in Spain lie somewhere in between. A good site to check out donor info is www.fertilityfreinds.co.uk they have a tmt abroad thread. Meanwhile I admire you for the adoption option in parallel, good luck sweetie.

Anna, Amfy and evryone else big hugs xxxxxxxxxx

I had to go alone to the gynae today ( I know dh spoils me) but it was Ok had first abdominal scan cos I am a big girl now and sweetie is HUGe - 9cm bum to head thing - showing 14+6 instead of 14 weeks OMG! The nuchal result was very good, 1:738 for Downs and 1:884 for other rare genetic disorders. I thought you would be interetsed as the calculation was weighted by my age, donors age and origin AND the fact it was ICSI (I didn't know that had an added risk factor did you???) - so we are very pleased. The doc said what was most important was that very single measurement and all blood values were well well within normal ranges, so although the wieghting gives a number, she felt that it was a very good result and wuld be happy with that froma 26 year-old (the age of our donor) so I came out feeling quite like a Spring chicken Not that the result makes any difference, but it's nice to know sweetie is doing well. Still very pukey but off the meds now apart from 300mg ultrogestan pessaries til week 16, doc reckons that's the hormones surging and the placenta "giving gas" as we say here. Belly is swollen like pmt and I feel tired as hell, but I know how lucky I am so I am just grateful every day.
I took the liberty of updating the list for Sand, Caz and Zippy although you need to add your info girls..and I hope you don't mind I changed the pg category to ladies in waiting as home and dry is only when sweetie is in my arms, so muc can go wrong from BFP anwards, as we all know to our great sadness. Home and dry 40+ from 2005 are Allette (own eggs), Jude (DE twin girls IM), Joy (DE twin boys ISIDA)....Debra can you think of any others I forgot???? maybe it would be motivating to put them in?? I leave it to you ladies..

biggest hugs and kisses to all

bigJ

Ladies in waiting
BigJ (Jules) - BFP 9/12/05 - EDD 15/08/06 praying hard

2ww:
Sandra - Test 15th Feb test again 17th Feb
Randa - Test 17th Feb
Debra - Test 21st Feb
Caz - test date???

On meds/about to start:
Anna - Waiting for AF to start short protocol
Diane - start meds 28th Feb.
Kat - Going to Spain 2nd March for testicular biopsy for new DE tmt
Lara - Scan 14th Feb
Tammy- SIS 9th Feb, IVF 2 March
Zippy -?

Preparing:
Amfy - FET March/April
Bev- waiting for egg donor, considering abroad - appt 16th Feb at IM
Gail - planning March IVF
Jane- visit to Spain 24th Jan to decide next step
Jen - Taking time out then, next IVF in May...
Michelle - blood test Tues 14th Feb for 2nd cycle
Robyn - 2nd IVF cycle in March

Recent cyclers:
Lisa - BFP Feb but sadly lost at 5 weeks after DE
Caroline - natural FET cancelled Feb, failed thaw.

[DebraP]

Excuse the brevity, looks like I've slipped a disc or similar. Am in rolling-around pain except I can't roll around..... I won't take any pills so am stuck with putting ice on it and trying to lie on my stomach when I can.

One way to pass this final week of waiting I guess....although crap news for the self-employed.....

Debra

[032323]

Hi everone

Randa
Thanks for your reply - am also on Feb thread.
Yes! Wow there are lots of similarities!
Migraines have only started in the last 6 months - but usually only at the beginning for a day or so.
Great to see your symptoms have disappeared!! Good luck and lots of babydust for tomorrow - am tempted myself but worried about the outcome - still cramping today but staying positive!
ec - 1/2 et 3/2 (2 good 4 cell embryos) Was told to test on day 16 after et! I think my clinic always transfers on day 2 or 3 - didnt even know about transfering at blasto stage until I joined you guys! What about you -at what stage did you have et?

Sand - Really sorry to hear your news, bummer eh! Good luck next time!


Caz x

[randa2006]

Caz, sweetie, we need to know your exact test date for the list. (see list has ???? on your name where the date should be).

BigJ - so great to hear from you! And more good news on your little sweetheart! Thanks for the reminder that you didn't feel boob tenderness either right away, that really does give me hope.

Debra - a slipped disc can be very painful. How in the heck did you manage to do that? And give us an update on preg symptoms, please.

[032323]

TEST DATE IS 19TH FEB - BUT MAY TEST ON FRIDAY PROVIDED ALL IS WELL!!

CAZ x

[erjumper]

Sand,
So sorry about your negative. Not really anything that could possibly ease it for you but know that we're here for you.
Caz, welcome!
Randa, Go ahead and do the HPT....i'm dying here. Don't worry about any cramping or migraines. I had both of those each time I was positive. Don't give up! I know i'm the queen of negativity when it comes to me but it's much easier to tell someone else to be positive. Can't wait to read your good news.
Lara,
OMG...you poor thing. I would have been so flippin' mad about that HIV, Hep B test thing right in the middle. We have to do that here too but they should have done that before. They didn't really STOP your stim did they? Sorry about your neighbor telling you she's decided to have a third. My SIL (who has a 5 month old and got pregnant effortlessly at age 22)wanted to know what the birth stone is for June. She wants her next baby to be born in June so she wanted to know when she needs to conceive. The advise I wanted to give her would have no chance of getting her pregnant and i'd like to say I was ashamed of thinking it....but why lie?
Tammy,
We had our first home inspection and interview today after fingerprinting and countless forms for FBI clearances, etc. We can't afford traditional adoption so we have to try to foster and hope we will be able to adopt. Our case manager stressed that we may have a baby for 2 years or more and then have to "give it back". And it may take a year or more to have an infant placed. I just want all this to be over but I don't think it ever will. I'm finally finishing my post HCG drop bleed which was terribly painful again with all the endo but hormonally i'm getting back to normal so i'm not an emotional cripple anymore.
Sorry for those i've missed. I've talked too much already. Time for Calgon to take me away!
Lisa

[032323]

Hi Lisa

How bad were your cramps before your positives?? My cramping is really bad at the mo a real dull ache!!

Caz x

[erjumper]

Caz,
It was really bad. So much so that I called the doctor about it. Was sure I was going to bleed but never did.
Lisa