The 30-40 Group

I-1-2-b-a-mum · Post by **I-1-2-b-a-mum** » Fri Feb 17, 2006 5:54 am

It is so great talking to you guys. I thought I’d check in before my night cap and saw your post Jan.

Jan – Do I ever know what you mean about the gov’t being too laxed. I was stunned to find out, how the large amount of tax we pay here in Canada is being appropriated (or mis-appropriated), namely in way of benefits to the ‘not so responsible’. Don’t get me wrong, I know there are some genuine cases of need but not sure the gov’t knows who they are….But I’m going to spare you my soapbox speech tonight, as I’ve been at it all day.

Sml – You mentioned the ungraceful things we’ve had to endure thanks to IVF. Reminds me of my last encounter with my RE/Dr. It was one of my Ultrasounds for checking the follicles. There I was devoid of any underwear, flat on my back, legs up in the air and he approached me with cold gel, so I flinched. In his usually unsympathetic manner, he barked “Oh come on, relax!” I thought “RELAX?!, Listen sunshine, most men have bought me a dinner and a movie before getting as far as you have, so why don’t you re-bloody well-lax!”…..My body language must have said it all, as I was assigned a female RE for EC and ET. Decided I’m going to request her for next cycle, in an attempt to hang on to my somewhat battered dignity.

Don’t work too hard ladies, I’ll no doubt, speak to you tomorrow

Tracii · Post by **Tracii** » Fri Feb 17, 2006 7:45 am

Good morning! One more day for the next scan...still don't feel overly confident...may suggest to them I need to reduce the Synarela.

Jan - I am sorry AF has arrived....but still take the test...there are lots of stories about 'AF' arriving and being preggers. I have had 2 great appointments with Dr. Haagen Daz! He made me feel so much better

I was a working, career woman....I quit my job last April. Something I fought so hard for and gave up so much of my life - I had enough. I was a consultant for over 15 years travelling the world but only saw my DH on the weekends. I then switched to work in 'industry' and travelled occassionally abroad...but the company is a huge, german, beauracratic, male dominated company. Being a pushy, american female I did quite well until I started to step on people's feet...this is when the politics kicked in (men are very cruel) and I decided it wasn't worth it. DH has supported me every step of the way and he bought me a vineyard in Italy...I can be my own boss

We are in the midst of renovating a ruin and replanting the vineyard...a very slow task which gives me time to concentrate on the IVF.

Life is funny for years I did not want children...or better yet never thought about having children and then one day BAM! Clock starts ticking very, very loudly.

Off to get my haircut and highlighted (thinking optimistically that in a couple of weeks, won't be allowed to get coloring done.)

I hope you all have a great weekend!!

Tracii · Post by **Tracii** » Fri Feb 17, 2006 2:29 pm

New gossip...the hairdressers always has great gossip maggies...so it turns out J Lo is preggers too

sml · Post by **sml** » Fri Feb 17, 2006 4:41 pm

Wow -- J-Lo too?!! Must be sure to check out the trashy mag section at the newstand tonight.

Loving hearing everyone's work/life/ttc balance dilemmas -- so helpful to know that you all are grappling with some of the same concerns (and we are all scattered around the world too).

Traci, I was commuting all last year between London and the US and seeing DH every couple of weekends. Exhausting (though I only did for a year) and also it was pretty rough ttc! Now I've managed to take a leave to be in London for the year, but lots of big decisions aheahd -- do I look for work in the UK (though my field is very U.S. based), or do I, as the NY times put it, "opt out" (complicated decision in so many ways, and also, would seem easier, I think, if I were actually expecting). I'm glad you've come to a decision that works for you -- and your DH sounds wonderful -- a vineyard!!! My DH and I have this fantasy of one day owning a little vineyard, or an organic farm. Mind you we have absolutely no skills related to doing either aside from an affinity for wine and good food! Have you had much experience with vineyards/wine=making and/or refurbishing homes? Or are you just an enthusiastic oenophile? What a wonderful project -- do keep us all posted on how things progress!

I12bamum -- I laughed so hard at your RE anecdote. It's so ungainly, the whole bare-bottom stirrup knees apart experience -- and then there is that awful wand! I had a scan several weeks ago that actually hurt and seemed to be taking longer than usual. When I mentioned that it was hurting me, she said, "Oh, I'm sorry. I was just looking at ALL your fibroids. -- they're so....interesting." Grrr....I am not a speciman, lady!

Jan -- how are you doing today? Good for you to keep the will power to stay away from Dr. Haagen Daaz -- though I do hope you can find a way to treat yourself kindly this weekend. Maybe a movie with DH? A long hot bath? A massage? Take care of yourself sweetie -- I'm trying to follow my own advice and it is slowly helping.

Pam -- how are you doing on the 2ww? Another day down....!

Okay -- must get back to work. I took a "board" break because I seem to have just blown up my printer. No joke. I'm using a transformer with a U.S. cord and started to smell smoke as I was printing out a chapter I'd written. AAARRGH. Very frustrating and a little scary. Guess it's time to invest in a UK printer....!

Hope you all have a lovely friday night --

sml xx

jan33 · Post by **jan33** » Fri Feb 17, 2006 11:57 pm

Hey ladies! All is well here... I'm actually handling this one fine, and thinking of the next try. Much better than last time! I'm definitely not +ive....AF is full blown.

Traci: thinking of you for tomorrow...good luck girl.

I12b: how are you doing? Did the curse of the pee stick get the best of you yet??

sml: thanks for the encouragement...and right back at you. We'll get through this yet...just you see. This thread has to be good luck--how can't it be!

So, I have a question...
DH and I have only done DIUI so far...but we're thinking maybe we should try IVF (have no idea where we'll find the $$). In any case, can any of you give me an idea of how it goes...what the timelines are? See, for IUI, we've been going every month, no breaks. But when I look at other profiles on the board who've tried IVR, it's sometimes months between tries. Is that usually how it goes? I know not every case is the same, but maybe just an idea of what it involves?

We've only really ever considered IUI--cost was easier to manage, and since all was well with me, we thought Jan+some good swimmers = baby. Yeah, not so much.
Has anyone ever tried IUI with drugs (ie Clomid or something? My dr didn't suggest, but I'm wondering if I should broach the subject?)

So, now we're at the point where it's 4 failed attempts, so how many do we try before we move on? At this point it's costing us about $1000 per try...

Any thoughts out there?

I-1-2-b-a-mum · Post by **I-1-2-b-a-mum** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 5:16 am

Hi ladies! It’s great to see you’re all on form today. J. Lo is preggers? Wow! excellent news for her and family! Was wondering about them! Half expecting to see her on this board next month. Any truth to the rumour Cameron Diaz is expecting??

Traci –Hope today’s Scan reveals huge follies and nice thick endo! You want to reduce Synarel? As it suppresses natural ovulation, I imagine minimum daily dose is necessary, which you maybe on. I’m not good with nasal sprays and didn’t like it either but I believe Lupron (injection) is the popular alternative.
A vineyard and a ruin in Italy….Wow!!! I adore Italy! I used to live in the Cote d’Azur. I worked for a Monaco based Yacht company for a number of years, traveling back and forth to Italy was a weekly event. Totally fell in love with Tuscany! Used to fantasize about being Frances Mayes, (authoress of “Under the Tuscan Sun”). Great to hear those types of dreams come true but I understand why you may not have considered treatment there. Regulations of ART are horrendous in Italy! Thanks to the church. Re: Work, well I’ve also given myself off this year (I’m an Independent Contractor) for the exception of 2 projects, so I'm also looking forward to being a lady of leisure.

Jan – Sweetie, as that wretched peestick isn’t going to tell me anything conclusive, I’m not going to waste my time. Are you still going for your test on Mon? I have all signs of AF but no AF. I’m sure she’ll show up tomorrow, with her 15 matching Louis Vuitton cases! I know this visit is going to be a heavy one. Right now, my Boobs feel like boulders and I look 6 months preggers but that’s the side effects of Prometrium and Estradiol. Later, I will send you an accurate breakdown of our IVF cost (I’ll go through our receipts).

Sml – How’s your printer

I laughed when I saw that because I’ve done the same thing. Bringing over my English stuff here and having to search high and low for adapters. When we bought our house here I figured it was time to put more permanent features in but not before blowing up my favourite hairdryer

Tracii · Post by **Tracii** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 1:48 pm

aghhhhh...no follies and endo is still only 6mm. This is VERY weird!! It is like my body is totally fighting IVF. I am a complete health nut so I told DH maybe I should go eat McDonalds, and drink a bottle of whiskey to get the ovaries going. Some good news...FSH is rising and so is estradiol so I have until Thursday at the same 225 ie of puregon to make some results...if nothing on Thursday I would imagine they are going to cancel cycle. Doc seems very confused as well....is starting to think I had another chem pregnancy the cycle before....

smokeroni · Post by **smokeroni** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 3:53 pm

Traci - I am so sorry your body is reacting like this. Hoping that the Mcdonald's and whiskey do the trick. Good luck on Thursday.

Hi to everyone else.

Pam

I-1-2-b-a-mum · Post by **I-1-2-b-a-mum** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 4:15 pm

Traci – I’m dreadfully sorry to hear about your follies and endo. This is a bloody nightmare! Can’t imagine why this is happening but try and keep your chin up for Thursday, something’s got to give between now and then. I know it sucks but there’s still time. Tons and tons of PMA and a little bit of luck

.

BTW, my mum is a complete health nut, dh is also a major health/exercise nut, as was I, until a couple of years ago when my doc said I needed to consume more “fatty” foods

. He warned that I was a prime candidate for OHSS if we ever went ahead with IVF. Well at 5’10” and weighing 137lbs, I thought “Why not?” Well, since treatment I’ve put on 10lbs, yet I still suffered symptoms of OHSS. So, I say eat whatever makes you feel good, docs don’t always have the answers.

Tracii · Post by **Tracii** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 4:21 pm

No worries I wouldn't eat McDonalds or drink whiskey...although I did have an appointment with Dr. Haagen Daz

DebraP · Post by **DebraP** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 5:33 pm

Traci, best of luck between now and Thursday. I hope the extra Puregon pulls out the stops.

hugs
Debra

jan33 · Post by **jan33** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 5:50 pm

Can you imagine what a beautiful baby J Lo & Marc are going to have?? Checking out the celeb rags at the checkout today--boy, Angelina is keeping pretty slim...her bump even looks skinny! TomKat were in there too...she's looking good, although I'm not really a Tom fan..agreed to the comment a few days ago re: Tom & Brooke Shields. He's so high on himself right now he makes me nauseous.

Traci--sorry for the difficulty you're having.

Fingers, toes, legs, everything crossed for you. Keep us posted, and lots of PMA coming your way!

I12b--hmmm...not sure about the test on Monday. Sure it's going to say no, but thinking if I go, I avoid calling the clinic, telling them AF arrived, and having them question me if I'm sure , etc. Still thinking about it.

And sending happy thoughts your way...hang in there...perhaps AF has decided to delay her trip for about 9mths or so!!

Hi to everyone else and hoping everyone's weekend is going well.

Jan

Macca8 · Post by **Macca8** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 6:50 pm

Jan,

My sympanthy over your AF. I know how difficult that is.
On the note of goverment funding, the UK is as bad. When I went to my doctor for funding, he refused on the basis that I was quite able to concieve a child and that the state is not interested in funding IVF for us as a couple, as my husband had a vasectomy years before which he paid 5K since to reverse and failed and also he has 2 children with his 1st wife. Yet the moral ground does not stretch as far as the millions of single mothers that purposely get pregnant to receive goverment funding and housing at the taxpayers expense.

It's a no win situation and they will never listen or care.

We are fortunate luckily that we were able to fund our numerous attempts at IVF but what about those in the same infertility category that are not, where is the justice for them??? It's a shame.

Hope you are feeling better soon. Believe me I understand your disappointment, my embryos died before I got to ET last Thursday, I only had the EC on Tuesday so I wasn't expecting it to happen.

I-1-2-b-a-mum · Post by **I-1-2-b-a-mum** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 7:44 pm

Okay Jan, as promised I’ve listed in Cdn$ below what our total charge was for standard IVF. From the very beginning of the procedure, where medication was used to suppress my natural ovaluation, right up until the end of the procedure, the pregnancy test, it was a total of 44 days. I only stimmed for 10 days because I was a high responder, usually it’s 12-14 days for stimming. Once the follicles were big enough, the RE collected the eggs, fertilized them with dh’s sperm and replaced a couple in my uterus a few days later and froze the rest. Now it’s all up to the “man” upstairs. Between cycles, most doc’s insist on minimum 2 months to give your body a break from the trauma and the drugs. Let me know if you need more info.

$200.00 IVF Orientation
$4,500.00 IVF Cycle
$2,525.00 Medication
$300.00 Blastocyst Transfer (Embryos cultured until day 5)
$500.00 Extra embryos Frozen & Stored for 1 year - Optional
$8,025.00 Total

jan33 · Post by **jan33** » Sun Feb 19, 2006 10:50 am

I12b--thanks so much for taking the time to do the breakdown...it's about what I thought. How are you feeling?

We can't decide IVF or IUI--think we'll do one more round of IUI in March...then, if no success, we'll consult with dr and perhaps move to IVF. Wonder if they'll want to try IUI with drugs first? A try in March will make 5, then we go away in April, so that will give us time to relax, think and gain a new perspective.

On another note, has anyone had AF come and go but still have sore boobs? My body is behaving so wierdly right now...

The 30-40 Group

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