Hi Oneday!
Welcome to the boards!
Your profile notes you are from Surrey...are you in North America or in the UK?
Your story sounds alot like mine...I'm 33, DH is 39. Married for 13 (almost) years as well, and have known since year 2 that we'd not be successful at having babies on our own. Like you, no birth control since I was 20 and still waiting
We have unexplained infertility on DH's side...low/no sperm. He has 3 brothers who all have beautiful children...so it's just one of those cruel turns in life!

Everything is fine with me, so essentially with some good swimmers, it should be like falling off a horse!
Like you, we considered all the options, but chose to do DIUI as it was a more affordable option to start. We have tried 4 times with no luck, and are planning to start our 5th in about a week
I agree that you need to speak to your RE (reproductive endocrinologist) as everyone is different and they may want you to go straight to IVF...it's difficult to say. Have you tried reading through the options on the left on this site? There is lots of great info there.
I don't profess to be any expert on any of this...IUI is relatively easy procedurally...nothing like IVF, which is much more invasive. The ladies on these boards who have been through IVF are much more educated on hormones, etc.
And you are absolutely right...it is
very exhausting mentally, emotionally, physically. The mental/emotional part has been the hardest for me...just when I think I have it all under control, I lose it! When DH and I first were married, we had stars in our eyes! Once we found out he had no sperm, we were both devastated. So, we buried ourselves in education and work and gradually stopped talking about it...everyone stopped asking when we'd have children, and we stopped thinking about it. Then we started having nieces and nephews galore & the biological clock started ticking. So, it was time to decide--kids or no kids? And so here we are...and we can't imagine
anything we've ever wanted more. Funny how you think you've accepted something...then when the chance comes up again, you're right back to where you were 13 years ago...hoping and praying!
And so I found these boards...they are a godsend to me. A place to get away, keep up with others and just talk about your thoughts, fears and insecurities...and also to share your joys.
I mostly hang out on the "30-40 Thread" with a few others who are in various stages and treatments. Feel free to come join us over there...we just got another new member yesterday!
Take care and again, please come on over.
Jan