Pheonixes Rising

[luby]

Hi Nicki

Hope your OK? Yes I'm ready for treatment, I can't wait now, I'm getting more excited by the day. 2 months ago, I didn't think I'd be feeling like this, I never thought I'd be going through treatment again so soon, but I feel strong enough now. Let’s just hope its 3rd time lucky. (3 is my lucky number too)

As for the work situation, I know exactly how you feel, my boss and work colleagues know about my last cycle, I don't want anyone to know about my next cycle, not even my boss, I am going to take 3 weeks off as annual leave after ET. When I go for pre appointments etc, I will just have to tell a white lie, I will just tell them I have a hospital appointment, when they ask what for, I'm not sure what I'll say but I'll think of something. I'm not a good liar, but I really want to keep my cycle as quiet as poss, I have only told my parents and my sis. and of course you girlies on here.

I really don't know what you can say Nicki.? Just tell them you have a hosp appointment, you don't need to say anymore, but I know what offices are like, you can't do anything without others wanting to know all about it.....................! Hope you think of something Hun.

Take Care

Lucy

[luby]

Hi Gill

Welcome - its great you've decided to join us, the ladies on here are great.!

Sorry your frosties didn't make it. October will be here before you know it. Anyway Hun, we'll no doubt be speaking lots now you've joined us, so chat later.

Lucy

[MLG]

Hi Phoenixes

Lucy – Hope all goes well with holiday plans. Keep that positive outlook!

Souris – Welcome to the Phoenixes, it’s a lovely place to wait (definitely the worst time – waiting! ), with a great group of ladies

Julie – Hope rally went well

Gail – Hope you’re enjoying Egypt, tell all when you’re back

Jen – Welcome back from your holidays. Must say you sound wonderfully refreshed. Good for you

Lis – Hope the last few days were relaxing, and that you and DH are feeling better. Any news?

Nicki – I haven’t told anyone this time, just you guys. When I go to scans and appointments I either tell them I went to a doctor’s appointment (not explaining what kind) or that I’m getting together with DH (not a lie if he’s there with me) or that I’ve things to take care of. Since they are at a time compatible with my lunch hour it’s easier to explain.

Smita – How’s our mommy and her baby-girl doing?

Rachel – Welcome back. Almost time for THE tmt!

Lola – Hope holidays are all you expected, and more

Paula – Hope all’s well with you

Gill – Welcome to our group of ladies, you’ll find plenty of great support here


Hope I've not missed anyone. Hope all have a good rest of week


My headaches are not that bad and I feel they are getting better. My PMA has been fluctuating, never very good or very bad. Today started out quite good but my last shot was late (supposed to have them every 12 hours, more or less ½ hour, but forgot and it was almost 1,5 hour later). Nothing to do now, so not crying over spilt milk.
Having my bloods and baseline? scan tomorrow, will talk to consultant about it then.
Going on another biggish work-related trip after-tomorrow, for a meeting (+/- 300km).

Looking forward to the weekend

xxxxx

[Lis]

Hi Phoenixes

Souris and Gill welcome and glad you could join us. Souris, I'm so sorry about your photos - its just one of those horrible things that happens and its so upsetting/frustrating!! Have you and dh made up yet?

Gill - here is a great place to wait til October I'm sorry your tmt hasn't worked out so far but this will be your year. My situation is totally up in the air at the moment so you might not be the last in October!

MLG - glad the headaches are going. How did the scan go today?? dh and I are still waiting on news about the lab results. Phoned this morning, they got sent to the wrong hospital. Urghhh Phoning within the next hour when they said they should have them back. Fingers crossed.

Jen - welcome back, we've missed you. Sounds like you had a great time and are refreshed and raring to go How was the dinner dance??

Lucy, Nicki- you are both bursting with PMA!! This year is going to be your year. BFP here we come........

Lola, Gail.... how were hols? And how is it all going Lola with down reg?

Rach - how are you doing?

Julie - missing you honey, are you ok? How was the rally driving??Did you have a go or just watch from the side lines as dh did his macho stuff

Smita - glad you're still keeping in contact.

I'm just back from visiting the folks and some friends for a few days. Had a lovely time going out for meals, meting my old school friend for cocktails and seeing my cutie 2 yr old nephew. Well off to occupy myself until I can call the unit at 3 pm for dh's lab results. Will let you know how it goes.

[angelamw]

Hi Girls

I don't usually post on this thread but always have a quick read to see how you are all getting on. I just wanted to send a quick message to nicki to say I know exactly how she feels. In my old job I let some people know I was ttc and it was awful. We have 4 girls fall pregnant in short sucession and when they brought their babies in to see us it was almost as if they didn't want to hand them over to me for a cuddle like they were willing to with everyone else. For goodness sake what do they think I am going to do, go crazy and run off with them just because I haven't been able to have my own yet.

Now I run a club with my husband and the committee who employ us are mainly old men so I haven't told any of them about the treatment. So far we have been lucky and my husband has been able to cover for me with a few white lies. I just know how they will react if they found out.

Hope you get by OK and if you run out of excuses drop me a line and we can share some.

Good luck
Angelamw

[cgsears]

Hi All,
Thanks so much Lis, MLG, Luby and Nicki for the welcome, it feel so good for someone to understand.
I`ll be starting my work up next week and can relate to others who don`t want to explain what they are doing. We live in a very remote area and the clinic sees just about everyone within a 100 miles, I`ll have to be careful what I say or the whole town will know
We have told family we will be doing another IVF cycle, they don`t and won`t know about DE....that`s why it`s so nice to share it here
Thanks!!
Gill

[souris]

Hi Girlies!

Lis, Mlg, Smita , Lucy, Nicki, thank you for the welcome!

Lucy, I wanted to ask you if the menopur arrived all in 1 piece?
Smita, how are you and your baby girl doing? I sent you a pm, but not sure you got it, i am having troubles with the site lately.

Am still upset about the photos, but made up with dh . I have advised him to get the best IT nerd he could find to try to get those pics back. So i am waiting...

Mlg, hope the tmt is going well! Of for those waiting, hope the time flies...

I am off to Germany next week, to see an old friend (who had a baby girl!) and then, home sweet home, I will be in france for 3 weeks!! Yipee!!

Last April, when I went for my first cycle, I introduced a work collegue to my doc as she was TTC as well. The doc told her that it would be harder for her, being older (I was 22 and she was 39).
I received an email today, she gave birth to twins, a boy and a girl on valentines'day.!
Very happy for her, but cant help being envious... . I actually was really upset and it spoiled my day, horrible mean me...

Ok, that's all for now!

Big HUG to you ladies
xxx
souris

[Julie2039]

Hi Girlies!!!!!

I am back!!!.....WHAT A WEEK. Boss been away on his jollies and haven't even had time to f&rt (!) so to speak .....been in bed before 10 every night, brain strain! He is back today so thought I would catch up.....

Rachel - Hope ok. Let us know how you get on with the consultant

Lola - How was Switzerland? Hope you enjoyed the break. How did the scan go? Hope ok

Lis - Hi honey. How you doing? Hope you and DH are strong together and the break did you both the world of good. Let us know the results as soon as you get them (crossing everything for you)

Nikki - How ya doin? How's the diet going? You sound positive - keep it up chuck.

Jen - Glad you enjoyed your hol. Snowed in!!!! Bet you had a fab time. Sounds like it did you the world of good and am glad your dad is much better.

MLG - How are you? Hope the headaches have susbsided and you are feeling chirpier. PMA PMA PMA. How did the scan go?

Gail - How was Egypt? Do you feel ready for tmt? Hope its on track for next week and best of luck

Lucy - How are you feeling? You sound like your PMA has really lifted. Stimms in 6 weeks!!! WOW. Wishing you 3rd time lucky

Souris - Welcome. Any news on the recovery of the pics? Hope ok. Sending lots of PMA to you and BFP vibes for your next cycle

Gill - Welcome to you too - October will be here before you know it and here is the best place to be!!!

Hope I haven't forgotten anyone!

As for me, the rallying was really good. Verrry cold but good! I didn't participate and missed most of the action coz was too busy filming it but DH had a great time!

Jen, you asked how I was...well, I come on here to forget my own feelings really. I am up n down on the rollercoaster most of the time and cannot get over my fear of it all starting. I don't understand it!! Think it has been such a long wait and I have had to be so strong for my DH etc and have taken it too much in my stride. Reality has finally hit home and I am really scared! Think banking on a BFP too much and am a born pessimist!! Coming on here tho has taught me a lot and kicked me out of self pity as realise I have been through nothing compared to most of you and we are ALL going to have a BFP this year so have nothing to worry about!!


Nikki, I hope you find good excuses for your time off. I only work in a tiny office and told the boss and personell. I felt forced into telling the few girls I work with because with all the tears and time off at diagnosis they ASSUMED DH was having an affair!!!!!!! I now regret them all knowing because can't cope with all the questions, mainly coz nosey - not caring.

Anyway, I hope you all have a fab weekend. We are out tomorrow night with 4 other couples so looking forward to that and its our 10th anniv on Tues so hopefully DH will have a nice treat in store for me!!!

(Soz such a MAMMOTH post, got carried away.....)

Take care and have fun!!!!!

xxxxxxxxxxx

[gailp]

Hi to all of you. Sorry no personals, I feel as if I have missed so much over the last week and I am struggling to keep up Still in Holiday mode I think.

Egypt was fantastic, it was very very hot so I am nice and brown at the moment. The resort was amazing, snorkelling was fantastic and probably the only exercise I managed to do all week

Im due to start FET on Sunday, just sitting waiting for the drugs to arrive at the moment, I was told they would arrive by 1pm getting a bit worried now. Im sure they will turn up. PMA PMA PMA

Will try and catch up on whats been going on

[Lis]

Hi all phoenixes

I'm just checking in for a quickie (sorry) to let you all know that we got the lab results through and they were a BFN ..... ie. they found no evidence of sperm production in dh so that's it... the end of the road for dh ....... he can't father a child and we are so devastated all over again. I was prepared for this outcome so I don't understand why I'm so upset. I've spent most of today crying. To rub salt into the wound (and I know this sounds awful) my friend gave birth to a baby girl this morning - found out 2 hrs before we got the lab results back. She also called her Lucy which is one of the names dh and I thought of if we ever had a baby girl. I'm happy for her but can't feel happy right now if you can understand that? Couldn't even bare to go to a card shop today to buy a card for them...... I must sound so evil, I hate feeling like this.

Dh naturally wants time out now so I'm just gonna have to wait til he's ready but til then I'm in limbo. ie I can't arrange first consultation with Darlington. We're having to go there or somewhere in England as can't get donor iui in Scotland, anywhere. I feel as if things can't get any worse Sorry for all the negativity girls but I feel totally gutted and at a bit of a loss right now. Also due back to work on Monday and thought I'd be feeling a bit more up by now.

Hope you all have a good weekend.

Lisa xxx

[NickiMark]

Lisa, big hugs honey. I know where u are at, we had those same tears over no sperm, and also dh's mate's g/friend had baby and called it Kayleigh, the name we always called out to be baby, and they knew it too, which hurt like mad!!!!
It's best to take time out, as donor IUI is a big thing and you and dh have to be 100% before u ttc with DOnor as it's about the child after that not you and dh. You must think about from the childs point of view.

Did u view the dcnetwork site, I told u about??

Hope u can have a good w/end? xxx

Hello, to every one else too. xxx

[gailp]

Lisa im so so sorry. Life is just so cruel and unfair at times. Take all the time out that you need to sort out your next step and spend quality time with DH.

Nicky I read that your appointment went well, thats great news. Hows the diet coming along

[NickiMark]

Since Jan I have lost 5 lbs, so I guess it's going ok, but not losing it quickly.....was aiming for 2 lb a week but i am actually taking 1 month t lose 2 lbs.
I need to exercise I know, but it's so hard to find time.........Parhaps when it's warmer, I will feel like it!

Gail, when do u start tmt now???

[MLG]

Hi Phoenixes
Souris – Has IT-Nerd been got your pictures back yet?
You’re not horrible, that was a normal (instinctive) reaction. We all feel that way at times. Hope you have the best time in Germany and France.

Julie – Sounds like you had a really hard time at work this week. Glad rallying went well. At least it took your mind off things for a while. But remember that you have the right, in fact the duty, to grieve a feel bad for a while. But you’re right, its BFP year for ALL Phoenixes!!!!!

Gail – Glad Egypt went well. Feeling ready for tmt? Best luck and plenty PMA for you

Lis – So sorry about your news.
Please don’t apologise, you have every right to all the feelings you are going through. If we can’t be ourselves and vent here, where can we?

Hello to everyone else.
Wishing all Phoenixes a lovely weekend


I’ve been off to my "far-away"meeting and back. This time by train, so not so tiring and even managed to do quite a lot of work on the way there.
Had to give myself the morning injection in the train bathroom while it stopped at a station. The things we do!
My blood work and scan yesterday went well – all going according to plan.
Started on stims last night. Crossing fingers, toes, .....

xxxxx

[cgsears]

Lisa, I`m so sorry about the news, you both need time to recoup. Preparing your self for the news is very different than actually hearing it, because some part of you always holds out hope. I know you are both devastated but remember your goal hasn`t changed, you just might have to get there a different way.
Feelings of jealousy are normal too, at least I hope they are...I`ve basically stopped calling my sister who insists on telling my every single detail of her childrens daily routine, I scream inside because I want it to be me. I`m not angry at the children of course, but my sister makes me batty
On the topic of hope, if any of you are investors, I suggest any company that makes pregnancy tests, I`m 37 and even though several Drs have told me I will not get pregnant naturally, I have still purchased more tests than any sane person would admit I`m addicted I guess
You`re not alone, we`ll be celebrating our successes together..PMA
Gillian

2 failed surgeries to unblock tubes
1 failed IVF
All remamining frosties died during thaw
DE Oct Ukraine