May/June Buddies?

[Lisa L]

Hi there. I have been benched for the last 3 months after 3 unsuccessful IUI attempts and now we are approaching the big IVF decision for the first time. Of course I have all of the big stressors--no insurance coverage for IVF, etc...but right now I am trying to figure out the best time to actually go through the procedure when I am at my least stressful point.

The best month for us would be August ( I am a teacher and that would mean I could merge my paid maternity leave with summer vacation)--but August is also my most stressful month at school.

My next choice would be June, but we planned a vacation with 4 other friends 6 months ago to Cozumel Mexico beginning July 8th--is it even possible to go on a vacation in the first month after the IVF procedure? I am nervous about this--and stressed out to ruin the vacation for everyone else if I bail out. I am even stressed about not going on this vacation because I know how much my husband has been looking forward to it.

I don't know what to do and I am so tired of things being so HARD to figure out. I am 34 years old and I want kids so bad, but I always feel like I am making the "least bad" choice rather than having a good choice because infertility just sucks.

Is there anyone who knows what I am talking about?

[mafalda]

Dear Lisa L,
I think here you will find a lot of people who know what you are talking about...
I have been through 4 ivf attempts (1 was not completed) and 2 natural cycles since March 2005, and I think I understand your point...
Every single time I feel like I am trying to juggle everything in my life, so that I can go through with ivf... I have to think WAY in advance about upcoming trips, work etc. and this is SO nerve-wrecking... Things keep changing and the scedule you have worked so hard for is sometimes useless!
As you say, I am tired of thinking all the time how to make everything around me work... so this time I decided to give up! Not trying in general, but trying to fix everything.
I have come to terms with the notion that it is quite impossible to find the "right time" for ivf... there will always be something else planned around this time. I do take my calendar and general plans into account, but I recently decided not to take it too seriously.
To give you an example, for the past 4 months we have been trying to start ANY sort of effort (natural cycle, ivf), but something keeps going wrong and I have to change my plans again and again. Most of all, I have to live with the frustration of not being able to start trying again. Anyway, I think I am being transformed into a creature I don't recognize anymore... and I don't like that! Meanwhile, life goes on and I am not "here" to live it!
I am not sure if this is helping you at all... I just wanted to share my thoughts with you.
As for the planned trips... I have a business trip in mid-May, and it coincides with the beginning of my ivf treatment... I nearly went mad trying to figure out what to do, then I decided to take my medication with me and do the best I can.
In your case, you are wondering if you could travel 1 month after the ivf... well, if you are pregnant (which I wish and hope for you!), then the answer is probably not. I don't think you or your husband or any of your friends would want you to risk that. On the other hand, if "at first you don't succeed... pull yourself up and try again!" as the song goes. And in this case you can go on your trip.
Come to think of it, the hardest part for me is not ivf itself, but trying to fit everything around it...
Good luck with your effort!

[Lisa L]

Mafalda,

Thanks for your insight--I will be sending karma your way in May. I think you are absolutely right about relaxing a little bit and not trying to plan everything around the IVF cycle--it is just so hard to "leave anything to chance" with the whole thing!

Stress is HUGE for me. I normally function at a high stress level, and I don't want this to get in the way of our IVF attempt. Ironically, I don't know what the best way is to alleviate my stress. Am I more stressed about bailing out of a trip in July or about my responsibilities at the beginning of the school year?

I spoke with my doctor yesterday, and she said that travel is discouraged during the first trimester, period. I guess that answers the vacation question if we go through with things in June.

You mentioned that you feel like you are changing...and you don't necessarily like it. I feel the same way. I don't want my life to pass me by--I want to live it! Will this be possible even if the IVF doesn't work?

Why aren't there GOOD choices and BAD choices?? I am tired of BAD and WORSE choices!! I don't know if this even makes any sense.

Take care and good luck!

Lisa

[mafalda]

Dear Lisa L,
Life is full of crossroads... everytime you reach one, you have to make a decision... I don't believe in good and bad choices, I think we choose whatever feels right for us at the time, based on the circumstances (that are never the same).
Stress is something I have been trying to fight off my life too. Not just to increase my chances for pregnancy... but to have a better life! I cannot live at full speed any more, I need to relax my mind and my body. I try to find things that please and comfort me... I am sure you will think of a couple of things if you try... you know best what is right for you.
I can tell you that it IS possible to keep on living... not just living, but enjoying your life, even if ivf fails. And we should be doing that before, during and after ivf! As cold as it may sound, it won't be the end of the world if it doesn't go right! (it may feel like it for a few days, though...). You have more strength and power within you than you can imagine, everyone does. We just have to find the source and link to it. To me, this source is inexhaustible -- it is difficult for me to make the connection after a failure, but it's not impossible.
But let's not dwell on failure... let us think positively!
Just keep your spirits up... and everything will be fine!
Bye for now... take care and good luck to you, too!

[tinkerbellamom]

I think this is the group I belong in. My Egg retrival is scheduled for either June 22,23 or 24th. Right now we are waiting for my cycle to end so that I can start the BC and then the other meds. I am really nervous and could use all the BTDT advice I can get. I am hoping I can get some first hand experiances when it comes to mixing the meds and giving the shots my dh is nervous about that one. Also I was hoping to learn about things like excercise etc while doing the meds and then for the 2WW. I walk 2 miles in the am and then dh and I walk 2 miles at night and I attend an aerobics class 3 days a week that is med impact. Alot of running, jumping etc. We have been trying for over a year and it took us from Aug 97 til Feb 2001(dd was born in Oct 2001) to get pregnant with our daughter. We have both done all the testing and there doesn't seem to be a medical reason we are not concieving naturally except that when I had my HSG my tubes were blocked not 100% but almost but because my dh's sperm is good count and motility our doc didn't see any reason I wouldn't get pregnant within 2 cycles and we are now waiting on the 4th cycle sense the HSG to end.

I am looking forward to getting to know you all and praying that this is it for all of us.

[kdc2006]

my injections start 11th may....and egg collection 23rd may...any one else at this stage?...

i cant wait to start the injections...lol...not that i like needles or anything, its just the next step nearer to my goal...(fingers,toes and all else crossed)...i wish everyone else who is at this stage and beyond all the luck in the world......k...

[Lbebe]

My shots start on 15th May, gonna be 5 shots a day, sounds so scary, hopfully i will get over my fear over the needles.........

Good luck everyone, we need all the luck in the world !!!!!!!!!!!

[ushamar]

Hi everybody,
I am new to this forum.But I have read all your feelings today, before me writing here. I am now into my second IVF cycle[after my first failed in Dec05-Jan 06].Let us hope for the best.Good luck to everyone expecting BFP in June 06.

[Kerri]

Hello to all the May/June buddies! I'm looking forward to helping everyone by sharing my experiences as well as learning from yours.
I was recently part of the March chain but had my first failed IVF Cycle. I'm 35 and have gone through 4 IUIs unsuccessfully. Our first IVF Cycle was canceled because they said I was "overly" suppressed. I stimulated for 6 days and they slightly increased my stimulants but decided I was not where I needed to be so they canceled my cycle. It felt like forever before AF paid a visit---almost 50 days! Now I'm finishing my 2nd week of BCPs so 8 more days before I start my meds. They've changed my prescription to microdose Lupron vs. Lupron so I will be moderately suppressed. I still wish I could bypass the BCPs and Lupron but I guess this may avoid over stimulation. The fact I wasn't stimulated the 1st IVF cycle seemed a bit surprising and concerning to my doctor which worried me---I would think it does sometimes take some modifying before the meds are on target. She mentioned it's not uncommon but it's also not common. However, the more I research the posted stories I realize this happens with many women. I immediately jump to the worst case scenario and think this is going to be an enormous barrier. My husband is truly the optimist so I'm glad he can stay positive for the two of us! Looking forward to getting to know you all.

[Lbebe]

I am on BCP until 12th May, then Lupron on 15th, stim shots start on 17th May, I will taking one vial of menopur and 450 Gonal-F, 2 times a day of MD (micro dose) of Lupron, with such high dose, i was a little worry, my doctor give me highest dose possible since my FSH is 10, i would like to see a lots of eggs........

Good to see this group getting bigger, good luck everyone, lets try to help out each other!!!!!!!!!!

[angelamw]

Hi

Can I add mysefl in here. I am waiting for AF to start, which is due on Sunday and then we can start 3rd round of IUI next week.

Good luck to you all
Angela

[lynne]

Hi all,
I'd like to add myself here. I start downreg next Friday 4th for EC around 5th June.
I just want to get the ball rolling again now.
Good luck to all you ladies.

[mafalda]

Well hello everyone!
I am at the final stage of BCPs, hopefully my AF will arrive on 7 or 8/5, then if my day 2 tests (FSH/E2) are good, I can start with a short protocol (gonal-f 375 + menogon 2 vials) around the 9th or 10th May.
I am very anxious to get going again... on the other hand, I am much cooler this time (let's hope I can keep this up until the very end!... )
Good luck to you all!

[langton]

Hi everyone. like all of you on here i start my cycle this month too. i start my buserelin injections on wed 3rd may. This time i am having a FET. Which ive been told will be a brezze this time. I had quite a tough time in feb when i had icsi for the first time. everything that could have gone wrong did for me. it's a very long story. i dont want to boar you to much. but aswell as everything i ended up with bad ohss and had to have a total freeze. which i was sooooooo gutted about. i come soooooooo close then 2 days before the transfer i had to STOP . after everything i went through, i still got the best news i could ever wish for. I managed to get 15 little embreos waiting for me in the freezer.

So, thats me. ive waited patiently for 3 months and my time has come around. it's seems to have gone by so quikly!

I cant wait to get to know everybody on the may june buddies. so we can all go through it toghether. all the first timers, belive me everyone is your rock on here i really dont know how people go through it alone. im happy to help anyone, and hopefully share experiences with eachother.

good luck everyone, this month, is the begining of something beautiful.
positive thoughts

stay intouch everyone

Hayleyx

[TansRN]

Hello
My name is Tanya and I am going through my first round of IVF/ICSI due to dh having a vasectomy for >5 years...so we thought that we would just jump right in and start IVF. AF just left my house and i have to call RE when I have the LH surge and then ten days later I get lupron-depot shot to down reg. I am also on Gonal F as well as Menopur. I am looking for ER and ET to be around june 6-10 depending on when AF shows up again. This is all new to me and it is kind of neat to experience. Its nice to read about what all of you are going through as well to see what it is like...Good Luck to everyone! Looking forward to lots of BFP's!!!!!!!!!!!!!