Its not worked - again

jackiey · Post by **jackiey** » Sun Aug 10, 2003 9:54 am

hi i know i've not been posting much but i have kept my eye on the jcb's but there doesn't seem to be many iui girls at the moment so instead of posting i've just been reading, congratulations to all the positives and to those who got negatives, once again i know how you feel, its so not fair is it. On friday i really thought my tmt had worked and had thought about testing but yesterday all af signs were there with avengence (spelt wrong) and at 4 this morning i had the first bit of blood(sorry) i have had nothing since but that is how it started last time just a bit then i get my hopes up that its implantation and then it just all goes wrong. I'm so so fed up and i'm trying my hardest not to cry, dp is at work and i'm just on my own, my mum said she would come round but feel tight making her sit there watching me cry. why won't it work?????? i can't really say much more i'm too fed up good luck to anyone else who is testing soon love jackie

Nikki · Post by **Nikki** » Sun Aug 10, 2003 4:30 pm

Hi Jackie, Please cheer up, I know it must be hard. I have yet to start my treatment but I can imagine what your going through, try and stay positive, I'm sure your time will come. Take care Nikk

kathryn · Post by **kathryn** » Sun Aug 10, 2003 5:44 pm

hello jackie, I left you a message on nadines thread last night. I dont know when your due to test, but try not to lose hope. sore boobs are a good sign and so can a little bleeding. I know this has happened to you before but each time I have fallen pg (all m/c) has been totally different. Sometimes blood sometimes no blood. At the end of the day tho, you know your body better than any of us but I just wanted to say that everybodies symptoms are different and each time can be different, it doesnt neccesarily mean its all over. my heart does go out to you though, I was very fortunate to test positive on the 1st. It was faint, then another was stronger then by the 4th test it was faint again. I knew in my heart something wasnt right and Ive been bleeding everyday since. I wont know for sure until I have a scan on thursday , I know deep down what the news is going to be though. how many attempts have you had? Its so stressful, not being able to have a baby naturally and going through this tmt. But one day we are all going to be the best mumys and daddys there can be because we have all been through so much for something that is going to be the most precious gift ever to us. keep strong jackie and one day all our dreams WILL come true. take care lots of love kathryn x

jackiey · Post by **jackiey** » Sun Aug 10, 2003 7:26 pm

hi nikk and kathryn thanks for your messages kathryn af has definitley arrived, it was my 3rd iui attempt although the first attempt got abandoned too many follies 2nd attempt negative and once again another negative, i just feel so numb. I don't really hold out much hope with the iui and when i ring the hospital tomorrow i'm going to ask them how many attempts we have to have before we can start on ivf, depending on what they say i might think seriously about going onto ivf, but obviously at the minute can't think straight. I have been following your story on the jcb thread, how are you coping, it must be a nightmare for you. I hope things go well for you on thursday at your scan, you never know some people bleed for the first few months!!! not wishing that on you though good luck and take care love jackie

bubblymichelle · Post by **bubblymichelle** » Mon Aug 11, 2003 7:12 am

Jackie I know I have said this before but you must not give up hope yet, I don't mean to build your hopes up but look what I went through. I started bleeding before my test date and I had AF pains and everything. I convinced myself it hadn't worked and I even done a test early and it was negative (24 hours early) and I broke my heart I was so upset I couldn't think of anything I just didn't want anything I just wanted a baby. Well within 24 hours I tested positive and was still bleeding and I had mistaken mine for a period. I bled up till 12 weeks on and off and it was such a worry because I thought I was losing the baby. Well I am now 16wks and 4d and all is going ok. I know you don't want to build your hopes up but I had to post what I went through, not only for you but for others too, when have you got to test? Keep your chin up. Have you had anymore bleeding since? Love Shell. xx

kathryn · Post by **kathryn** » Mon Aug 11, 2003 8:21 am

Im really sorry jackie. I hope the clinic are helpful, maybe they will agree with you that ivf is the next step. I know how iui works but Im not familiar with it. Not sure of the procedure. Its just an awful feeling when you get that -tive especially over and over again. I really feel for you jackie. let me know how you get on with the clinic. lok after yourself kathryn x

diane30 · Post by **diane30** » Mon Aug 11, 2003 9:24 am

hi jackie im so sorry but remember i had 2 failed and 1 cancelled before mine worked so i suppose you could say it was 4 th really i hope you have another try thinking of you love diane

Nadine · Post by **Nadine** » Tue Aug 12, 2003 8:15 pm

Hi Jackie, I'm so sorry to hear that your treatment did not work! I have not visited this site for a while and tonight I have just found your message. I really hoped it would be third time lucky for you. As for changing to IVF I would definately talk to your clinic about it. At mine I could have 2 go's of IUI free or 1 IVF free. Some nurses felt I should go straight for IVF as they felt would have more chance with this and some felt I should try IUI as at the moment they think there is nothing wrong with me. We decided to go for IUI first and pay for it ourselves and save the funding for an IVF next. Everyone was happy with this. The reason I think the nurses were keen for me to go to IVF next was because It is diagnostic. They can see at each point of treatment any problems that are arising. I hope this does not sound as if I think there is a problem because I dont I'm just telling you my reason for trying IVF next if I have to incase it helps. I hope your BBQ went allright. I know exactly how you feel. All my freinds have children (3 mostly) and i went through a bad spell last year when i just couldn't face them. Anytime you want to talk let me know! Thinking of you Nadine xx Then again the more times you have IUI the bigger your chances are.

jackiey · Post by **jackiey** » Wed Aug 13, 2003 7:45 pm

Hi Nadine Thanks for your message, i'm starting to feel a bit better now, i was so upset this weekend and have only gone back to work today and even then i cried when i went in (that could be just the thought of having to work though!!!) I didn't go to the bbq i was in too much of a state, theres no way i could have faced going and there being a newborn baby there too. I rung the hospital and they said it is too soon to have ivf, i get 5 gos at the iui and she did tell me it is successful, i know it can be but at the minute cos its not working for me i just feel so negative towards it. We can't have another go now until october, we was having a month off anyway so we just have to wait an extra few weeks but it will soon pass and you never know in the meantime a miracle might happen. Are you testing on the 14th if so wishing you lots of luck i need some positive iui's to keep me going. Please let me know how you get on love jackie

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