The Over 40 Crowd

Discussion group for all topics related to infertility including preparation for pregnancy, causes, investigation and treatment of infertility.
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BevT
Regular
Posts: 312
Joined: Mon Jan 02, 2006 2:16 pm
Location: Lincs, UK

Post by BevT »

Hey Kat,

good to hear from you. Yes, you are right, as always, I cannot be too hard on DH - he has come so far already. It's just me being a whimp and would rather have him with me, but I knew right from the start that I would more than likely have to go for this second leg on my own. That's why we left his swimmers in the freezer on our first visit. Glad that you are still dropping in from time to time, we value your input and of course it's just nice to stay in touch eh?x

Hi Ilona,

welcome to our thread. Sorry, I cannot help you with the funding as I am WELL over the 40 mark. I didn't start the IVF journey until I was 44, so I have always had to fund my own tmts. How dreadful about the van. Some people are so dishonest - I take it you bought it privately and therefore had no comeback on the seller. I hope you manage to find a way to continue with your tmt. Good luck.

Anna, I think I am going to fly out next Wed (24th). I just need to get my day 3 scan done today to check the endo, then I'll have a better idea. Looks like they want me out there for 7 - 10 days to monitor my lining, and then for a bit of a rest after transfer. I would prefer to keep it as short as possible as the accommodation is about 100 Euros a night, so over 10 nights, mounts up a bit. We shall see. I'm glad to have you following on behind me. When will they give you details of your donor? I guess it will be soon eh? It is quite exciting but also a bit daunting at the same time (well for me anyway). It almost seems a bit surreal. Good luck to us both. x

Randa, good luck for your transfer. I am keeping EVERYTHING crossed for you this time.

Caz, good luck to you to. Looks like a June transfer for you then. Will be routing for you.

Love to everyone else, particularly Tammy, Debra and Lisa.

Bev xxx
4 m/c
Precious daughter stillborn @ 32 weeks
2 x IVF with own eggs
Now turning to DE tmt end of May.
BFP 13th June 06
Blessed with beautiful son William born 23rd Jan 07
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AMck
Valued Contributor
Posts: 1401
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 3:26 pm
Location: Surrey

Post by AMck »

hi Ladies

Kat, thanks for your message about QMH. Please don't worry about lurking. It is always good to hear from you. Good to see that you and dh are close after all you've been through. BTW I didn't recieve an invoice from Kingston Hospital, just a phone call from a 'temp' called Simon who left a message saying please phone Kingston Hospital. I had no idea what for. I didn't even know that QMH tmt was paid for through Kingston. Have I missed something? Anyway was racking my brains all weekend as to what this phone call might be about. Thought it might be something to do with my most recent blood tests. The imagination was running riot. When I finally tracked it all down it was the payment for all my cancelled cycles. I told the lady on the phone that 'temp Simon' needed some more training in customer liaison! Silly boy. I know, all that worry for nothing.
Hey ho we live and learn :wink:

Bev, flying next week. How exciting! Is your sister going with you? I didn't realise you would be in Kiev for so long. The hotel bills mount up don't they. Hope the scan went OK and you can go ahead as planned. Good luck and keep in touch if you can.

Hi Mitzy and welcome to the thread. Hope you are Ok and can get some funding sorted. What a horrible situation to be in. Can Citizens Advice Bureau help at all with the van thing? I'm sorry I can't help with your question as I have funded all tmt myself. Good luck and let us know how you get on.

Randa, hope all has gone well and you are Ok. Thinking of you.

Our list
New 40+ Mommies:
Alette (own eggs). Son Nov 05
Jude - twins (DE) 05
Joy - twins (DE) 05
CarolineP - Daughter Nov 05
Squew - twins 05

Ladies in waiting:
Debbieed - own eggs, BFP August 05. EDD - April 06?
BigJ (Jules) - BFP 9/12/05 - EDD 15/08/06 praying hard
DPerry (Donna). DE. BFP July 05
Darby (DE) - BFP
Nuala - natural BFP EDD 8th Dec, 1st scan 31st May

On 2ww:
Debra- BFN :( hugs xx
Lisa - BFN :( hugs xx

On meds:
Randa - EC May 12/ET May 15
Yasmina - Lupron begins May 9

Preparing:
Bev- DE cycle in Kiev, all set to go! fly out 24th May
Anna - DE cycle in Barcelona, start bc pills 17th May
Caz - started bcp 18th April, for 5th cycle, EC/ET week beg 12th June
Jen - Taking time out then, next IVF in May...
Gail - considering DE tmt abroad
Tammy- post IVF apptmt soon, adoption papers being organised
Mitzy - April BFN - follow up apptmt 24th May

Good friends not currently seeking tmt:
Kat - holidays booked to Mallorca and France

As for me, AF arrived this afternoon. A week early! Have emailed clinic and am due to start bc pills tomorrow. Can't quite believe it. Watch this space. :wink:

Hello to all
Anna x
Me 44, DP 42 ttc 3yrs
7 cancelled IVF cycles during 2005/6
ED tmt at IM June 06 BFN
ED tmt at IM July 06 BFP
Matthew born 23/3/07
erjumper
Regular
Posts: 126
Joined: Fri Aug 05, 2005 1:31 pm
Location: Pennsylvania, US

Post by erjumper »

Hi everyone, Have been quietly peeking in on everyone's progress. Randa, Hope your thaw and transfer went well this am. I'll be thinking of a BFP for you.
Amazingly i'm doing very well. I'd be lying if I said that I didn't feel sad when I turned down the diaper aisle in the grocery today or that seeing pregnant women doesn't make me sigh. But it's a momentary thing and I don't think about it constantly. We are looking to our future and I know that it doesn't include me delivering a baby. I would like some opinions though. We're all tapped out on insurance assistance for IVF's but I have enough injectible medications of all kinds to complete an IUI cycle. We'd use donor sperm of course and ordinarily IUI's only have a 10 to 15% success rate but my RE says if I wish to give it one last try he'd do a VERY AGGRESSIVE stim cycle to produce 8 or so eggs which he feels may give us a 20% chance. We both know that those aren't great odds and then we have that chromosome issue with my 41 year old eggs to contend with and frankly having another positive and then losing a heartbeat would be far worse than a negative. I just figure since i've got 2000$ worth of meds....why waste them. What does everyone think?
Hugs,
Lisa
Me-41 DH-28
IVF's
#1 m/c 5 wks
#2 BFN
#3 m/c 9 wks
#4 m/c 8 wks
#5 m/c 5 wks donor eggs
#6 FET BFN
DebraP
Valued Contributor
Posts: 2784
Joined: Sun Nov 23, 2003 4:40 pm

Post by DebraP »

Lisa, it depends where you head is. Have you absolutely, completely finished hoping for your own child? If yes, don't open that box of hurt again, sod the 2000 , it's money already spent and you might be able to donate it. If you've not, go for it fully aware of what, tragically, has been your track record previously. How much more hurt can you both accommodate? Like me, you know the problem isn't necessarily getting pregnant, it's staying that way.

I wish you luck, a difficult decision you have to weigh up whether or not you feel 100% ready to stop/start again.

Randa, I hope you had good news today re. the thaw and ET.

Bev and Anna, best of luck with your cycles.
Anna, you can move me down to the 'friends not seeking tmt' if you would.

Ilona, sorry to be checking out just when you join. I've loved this board, it's seen me through 8 cycles, couldn't have coped without its support. In answer to your questions, the only people with answers are your local PCT / health authority. It all depends on the local rules for your area, their budget etc. Good luck at your apt.

hugs
Debra.





Debra.
Me: 44, DH: 31
Game Over.
Dates: Aug 02 - May 06
Tries: 5 fresh + 4 frozen.
Results: 1 daughter, 2 m/c, 1 ectopic.
children
Regular
Posts: 491
Joined: Tue Apr 04, 2006 6:59 pm
Location: USA
Contact:

Post by children »

Hi Lisa,

Have they found out why your mc rate is so high? Looking at your ivf history, you had 67% success rate so far, which means that your clinic is very good at ivf, I think it worth of trying once more with DS of ivf. I have not done iui before but from reading posts from others, it is less reliable than ivf - I mean I understand that ivf success rate depends on RE's skills, of course, yet iui requires better trained REs to get it done right. It is good to know that you are doing so well and wish you luck on making decisions.

Yasmina
Me, 50 DH, 40
IVF, 11/05, 19 embryos(e), no ET, OHSS
FET, 02/06, cancelled, dominant egg
FET, 04/06, 4e, BFN
FET, 06/06, 6e, DD born 02/07
FET, 05/08, 5e, DS born 01/09
http://yasminachina.blogspot.com/
Kat
Regular
Posts: 665
Joined: Sun May 04, 2003 5:12 pm
Location: Chessington, Surrey, UK

Post by Kat »

Lisa, it's such a difficult decision to make... I know that I couldn't do another cycle now even if the UK clinic called to say they have a donor, we would not do it (still haven't quite managed to call them to ask them to take my name off the list...). I would say if there is any tiny part of you left that will later regret not going for it one last time then do it, if not then it's time to stop.

Love to all
Kat xx
Me & DH both 41
ICSI #1 - abandoned
#2 - cancelled - DH accident
#3 - 1 transferred, bfn
#4 - 2 transferred, bfn
#5 - abandoned
#6 - no eggs at EC
#7 - DE in Barcelona - bfp but lost Dec'05
#8 - DE UK - bfn
#9 - FET Sept/Oct '07....
032323
Regular
Posts: 313
Joined: Sun Feb 12, 2006 8:37 pm
Location: UK

Post by 032323 »

LISA - IF YOU HAVE THE MEDS AND CAN AFFORD WHATEVER IT COSTS THEN I SAY GO FOR IT!!

AT LEAST IF IT DOESNT WORK YOU CAN SAY THAT YOU GAVE IT EVERY CHANCE AND NOT WHAT IF??

GOOD LUCK!!
CAZx
me 44 dh 40
6th icsi - ET 1 FEB - BFN
(3rd transfer)
SQUEW
Regular
Posts: 199
Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2003 10:13 am
Location: West Sussex

Post by SQUEW »

Hi Girls

Caz, just to let you know that Alexander and Evie are the result of my only cetrotide cycle :D I had a poor response to the long protocol in the cycle before and only got 3 eggs. On the short cetrotide cycle I had 13 eggs, which resulted in 10 embies, 8 went to blasto. I found it a much nicer way as I always felt soo grim when I had to down reg, although that cetrotide really does sting :shock:

I wish you loads of luck, and the same applies to all the other ladies on this thread. Every day I count my blessings, but I am also living proof that you can get pg at 40.

Good luck girlies

Much love
Sue xx
Me 41 DP 40 3 xIVF,2 x FET all neg, 4th IVF +ve !!!! Twins!!Evie Lara 6lb 5 and Alexander Jack 6lb 9 38wks + 2 days
<url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/2;10728;34/st/20051014/n/Our+Babies/k/0ff8/age.png[/img]
randa2006
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Posts: 583
Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 7:32 pm
Location: Seattle, WA

Post by randa2006 »

Lisa - I can understand feeling pulled back toward the fray because you have a considerable amount of drugs left and they have a value. Maybe to help isolate how much of an influence the $$ are having on this decision you could figure out what your costs will be in addition to the $2000 in drug savings. Say the additional would be $4000. Then look at it as if it costs $4000 to do another cycle (pretend you don't have $2000 in drugs), would you do it?

Best of luck to you on this. I just bought a book called "Smart Choices" because I want to learn how to make better decisions. Wish I had already read it so I would have more advice for you.

Welcome Mitzy! Glad to see our European ladies have some advice for you on the funding issue. Things are very different in the U.S. so I am no help on that. But, if you do go forward with another cycle stick around. We are a very supportive bunch with non-financial issues as well.

Bev, sounds like you are feeling better about things. What an exciting time for you! With donor eggs, I feel that you and Anna are much closer to being pregnant than I am. Our docs have said all along that it is almost a sure thing to go the donor route. You two are going to be our next success stories, I just know it. (well, I might get lucky and surprise even myself though???)

Kat and Debra, so glad you are still with us. Debra, how are you today? You aren't sharing much about where your head is.

Hello to the rest of the gang. I'm following your progress, but no time to properly address everyone just now.

My news: Dh felt very strongly that we should not thaw. He reiterated that he wants to save those for child #2 - WOW! (See how different men can think! We haven't even managed to get pregnant with #1 and he is still thinking as though we have all the time in the world!!! :shock: ) I wasn't upset at all, I said, "that's fine with me." We transferred the two fresh and we'll see what happens. I'm 44 and we only transferred 2 - not very good odds. My hopes are not very high.

Here's the list. I updated my part and Debra's.

Our list:
New 40+ Mommies:
Alette (own eggs). Son Nov 05
Jude - twins (DE) 05
Joy - twins (DE) 05
CarolineP - Daughter Nov 05
Squew - twins 05

Ladies in waiting:
Debbieed - own eggs, BFP August 05. EDD - April 06?
BigJ (Jules) - BFP 9/12/05 - EDD 15/08/06 praying hard
DPerry (Donna). DE. BFP July 05
Darby (DE) - BFP
Nuala - natural BFP EDD 8th Dec, 1st scan 31st May

On 2ww:
Lisa - BFN hugs xx
Randa - test May 28

On meds:
Yasmina - Lupron begins May 9

Preparing:
Bev- DE cycle in Kiev, all set to go! fly out 24th May
Anna - DE cycle in Barcelona, start bc pills 17th May
Caz - started bcp 18th April, for 5th cycle, EC/ET week beg 12th June
Jen - Taking time out then, next IVF in May...
Gail - considering DE tmt abroad
Tammy- post IVF apptmt soon, adoption papers being organised
Mitzy - April BFN - follow up apptmt 24th May

Good friends not currently seeking tmt:
Kat - holidays booked to Mallorca and France
Debra - ???
Randa
Me 44, DH 40
ttc 0, went straight to IVF
1st EC = Feb 05, 5 frosties, no transfer attempt
2nd EC = June 05, cancelled
3rd EC = Sept 05, 4 frosties, no transfer attempt
4th EC/ET = Feb 06, 3 transf., BFN
5th EC/ET = May 06
DebraP
Valued Contributor
Posts: 2784
Joined: Sun Nov 23, 2003 4:40 pm

Post by DebraP »

Randa, best of luck for 28th. Your DH's optimism is clearly very strong.

I didn't mean to be closed re. how I'm doing, I just take it a day at a time. I think I'm OK, I had a very bad couple of days before the weekend but am trying to accept that this is how it will be for a long while and to acknowledge the ups and downs as part of the deal. I suspect I'm smothering DD a bit, I cry when I look at her and think how lucky I am. It will take lots of time I suspect.

I've changed my entry and added the good news of Debbie's baby.

Our list:
New 40+ Mommies:
Alette (own eggs). Son Nov 05
Jude - twins (DE) 05
Joy - twins (DE) 05
CarolineP - Daughter Nov 05
Squew - twins 05
Debbieed - own eggs. Daughter May 06

Ladies in waiting:
BigJ (Jules) - BFP 9/12/05 - EDD 15/08/06 praying hard
DPerry (Donna). DE. BFP July 05
Darby (DE) - BFP
Nuala - natural BFP EDD 8th Dec, 1st scan 31st May

On 2ww:
Lisa - BFN hugs xx
Randa - test May 28

On meds:
Yasmina - Lupron begins May 9

Preparing:
Bev- DE cycle in Kiev, all set to go! fly out 24th May
Anna - DE cycle in Barcelona, start bc pills 17th May
Caz - started bcp 18th April, for 5th cycle, EC/ET week beg 12th June
Jen - Taking time out then, next IVF in May...
Gail - considering DE tmt abroad
Tammy- post IVF apptmt soon, adoption papers being organised
Mitzy - April BFN - follow up apptmt 24th May

Good friends not currently seeking tmt:
Kat - holidays booked to Mallorca and France
Debra - Finished with tmt. Off to Sicily in June. Want a new job by Dec.


Debra.
Me: 44, DH: 31
Game Over.
Dates: Aug 02 - May 06
Tries: 5 fresh + 4 frozen.
Results: 1 daughter, 2 m/c, 1 ectopic.
children
Regular
Posts: 491
Joined: Tue Apr 04, 2006 6:59 pm
Location: USA
Contact:

Post by children »

Thanks Sue, for giving us hope!!!

Randa, best luck with your 2 ww. This is hardest but also the most exciting period. My fingers are crossed.

Naula, how did your exam go?

I am on E2 today and transfer will be on June 5’s week. We met our REs and embryologist this morning again for another post consultation b/c regarding how we could use our remaining 13 embies wisely - I try to get my RE to do blastotransfer. But we were told that would not give any advantages over 3 day transfer. So, we stick with 3d transfer. We were advised to do more aggressive approach - transfer more embies this time b/c they never had multiples in "older women". We also suggested embryo glue, but were told they already used it with different component but the same function. The conclusion: we had only one emery: advanced age. The only way to fight it: multiple ivfs and longer period of time - what a dilemma!

All the best to every one!

Yasmina
Me, 50 DH, 40
IVF, 11/05, 19 embryos(e), no ET, OHSS
FET, 02/06, cancelled, dominant egg
FET, 04/06, 4e, BFN
FET, 06/06, 6e, DD born 02/07
FET, 05/08, 5e, DS born 01/09
http://yasminachina.blogspot.com/
amfy
Regular
Posts: 147
Joined: Sun Sep 11, 2005 8:09 pm

Post by amfy »

Hi all!

How strange that AMck should ask about me on the last page when i've just popped back in today as i am ready for another run at it.

I have lurked every now and again over the past 6 months but I've found that I cry for all the BFNs and then I cry for all the BFPs too! I'm really not sure how good this site is for me!! My heart goes out to all of you who've had bad news since we were last in touch.

Anyway, I have just started weeing on sticks and expect a surge in the next couple of days to indicate a frozen egg transfer early next week.

I have just 2 embyos over from my first cycle but they were a little slow to divide before freezing so i am not especially optomistic.

Over the past 6 months since my first attempt I have kept putting it off for various reasons but then i realised that I was treating my frosties like an unchecked lottery ticket. You know how sometimes you might carry a lottery ticket round in your purse for weeks so that when times are a bit rubbish you can think "Oh, I haven't checked my lottery ticket" and dream that there might be some escape. But, as soon as you've checked it you know its gone.

I guess i'm scared that once i've gone through the next couple of weeks, that could really be it, gone. I've got to face it some time though.

This is the last chance, if it isn't going to happen it isn't going to happen and I need to stop hanging on to that unchecked ticket and move on.

I'll keep you posted. I'm off work for the whole 2ww this time if i get that far so i'm sure I'll be around a fair bit.
Jeni Babes

Post by Jeni Babes »

Hi Amfy
i too have just popped in... so glad to hear from you...good luck with the frosties x x

i just also popped into say hi to everyone...i am stimming again, but only have 2 follies at this stage fingers crossed they 'll be more growing. we need 3 to go to ET. last time it took 14 days of stimming to get to HCG so as i am only on day 9 i have about 5 days left...hear's hoping next scan Friday 19th then if A okay Mon 22nd scan too.

i big Hi ya to ya all...randa wishing you BFP on the 26th... Anna good luck with your donor :D Glad to hear AF is being good! Love to all of you...too many for more personals :wink:

love jen
xxxxx


Our list:
New 40+ Mommies:
Alette (own eggs). Son Nov 05
Jude - twins (DE) 05
Joy - twins (DE) 05
CarolineP - Daughter Nov 05
Squew - twins 05
Debbieed - own eggs. Daughter May 06

Ladies in waiting:
BigJ (Jules) - BFP 9/12/05 - EDD 15/08/06 praying hard
DPerry (Donna). DE. BFP July 05
Darby (DE) - BFP
Nuala - natural BFP EDD 8th Dec, 1st scan 31st May

On 2ww:
Lisa - BFN hugs xx
Randa - test May 28

On meds:
Yasmina - Lupron begins May 9
Jen- short cycle, stimming, 2 follies

Preparing:
Bev- DE cycle in Kiev, all set to go! fly out 24th May
Anna - DE cycle in Barcelona, start bc pills 17th May
Caz - started bcp 18th April, for 5th cycle, EC/ET week beg 12th June
Gail - considering DE tmt abroad
Tammy- post IVF apptmt soon, adoption papers being organised
Mitzy - April BFN - follow up apptmt 24th May

Good friends not currently seeking tmt:
Kat - holidays booked to Mallorca and France
Debra - Finished with tmt. Off to Sicily in June. Want a new job by Dec.
BevT
Regular
Posts: 312
Joined: Mon Jan 02, 2006 2:16 pm
Location: Lincs, UK

Post by BevT »

Hi everyone,

Jeni, so glad that you have popped in again. Good luck with your stimming and good luck today for that scan. Here's hoping that a few more follies have appeared.

Hi Amfy, welcome back. Wishing you every success with your FET next week. I loved your analogy of the unchecked lottery ticket. SO TRUE. However, if you never check your "ticket" you will never know. I think the odds are more in your favour for a successful outcome than that of winning the lottery though, isn't it something like 1 in 20million or something ridiculous? Good luck.

Yasmina, good luck with your FET also, June will soon be here.

Debra, hang on in there, hope DD is "looking after you" with lots of cuddles and kisses for her lovely mummy. Sicily will be lovely in June, bet you're looking forward to it.

Randa, good luck with your 2 ww.

Sue, how wonderful that you have your twins - and from your own eggs too. A true inspiration.

Hi Lisa, if you can cope with the stress of another cycle, then I would definately use the meds. You never know, and if you don't try, you won't know. Difficult decision for you I know, but I just cannot think at this stage of not exhausting every which way, before I can call it a day. That's my view anyway, but I know we are all different. Take care, and if you do decide to try the meds, good luck.x

Well, with me it looks like I may be going to Kiev a bit later. Speaking to the overseas co-ordinator, it seems that I need to take another drug for 14 days before transfer, which I start today, so as I still have not confirmed flights etc, I may put off my departure. It is quite difficult being so detached from the whole process, being so far away and relying on e-mails. I am just waiting to hear back from them as to my new suggested date! Will I ever get there? I hope so.

Love to everyone else, take care all,
Bev xxx
4 m/c
Precious daughter stillborn @ 32 weeks
2 x IVF with own eggs
Now turning to DE tmt end of May.
BFP 13th June 06
Blessed with beautiful son William born 23rd Jan 07
CarolineP
Regular
Posts: 176
Joined: Mon Mar 21, 2005 1:45 pm

Post by CarolineP »

Randa

I got a BFP with 2 transferred embryos - it can be done. Keep up the PMA.

We are due some good news - it could be YOU!

CarolineP
Me 50 DH 57 - TTC 10 years
IVF July 04, Sept 04, Dec 04 all -ive
Mar 05 +ive - Amelia Leah born 30/11/05
Locked