Oct 05 Cycle Buddies

[Inhale, Exhale]

Hi Girlies!!
I am back from road trippin... Hows my girls? It seems that there are pesky invaders everywhere. Littles and her bugs and Jen with her computer virus...

Jen is wiskin away mini style heh?? Too cool for school Jens. Let the sunshine in, open up the top, let the hair flow.... rollin with the homeys.... is it as good as you thought? Also, big high kicks for selling your house.. yahoo cowgirls! Your schedule sounds great.. only a couple more months until you have everything a girl could ask for!

Littles- ughles. still havin a rough go? sending luvs from across the way. what a pesky little brat that aunt flow, havin the nerve to show up just one day too late. But don't fret. there is a reason! If you remember, I had to cancel my last cycle because my auntie never showed until day 51.. crazy outta control girlie parts! who told them they could act as they please? have you taken a dip in the pool yet? it is probably hot enough over there for even me to swim. It has to be in the 90's for me to go..

Camilla- life still floatin along for ya? hope so... your day of planning meals and shopping and cooking sounds lovely. I love it when I have a day at home to cook a tasty treat. Usually during the week I am too tired to cook a big meal. .. fast and easy is my motto during the work week. By the by, when is this sleepy tired stuff going to pass? everyone said around week 12.. it will be 14 weeks in a couple of days... afternoons are the worst! Were you on progesterone? they took me off on the 3rd and did bloodwork on the 5th that came back lovely.. they aren't going to test it anymore. Makes me nervous how low it was that they won't be monitoring for a little.. normal?

Walsher a go-go: You are such a healthy little tart! You would fit right into the yogi world.. I have to admit that I luv a Big Mac.. a big beef filled no-no. But you.. green goo drinks, exercise, healthy eating and now the needles.. (the good kind of course) .. have never done that. I figure we are stuck enough! I miss exercising so much!!!! but all for a great cause.. As for funnel cakes... imagine if you will.. cake batter swirled in a deep fryer to a golden brown and topped with powdered sugar... yummy goodness.

Looler- I refuse to be nervous about your dissappearance and am going to assume that DH surprised you with a much deserved vay-kay trip to remote island with you, him and the sexy guys wearing palm leaves and fanning you with the extras... I also see fabulous fruity umbrella drinks.. is that Demetrio in a palm leaf????

As for me.. countin the days until my vacation.... I plan to read many a books and relax.. 2 weeks and counting.... hoo-RAH
I have a very busy weekend.. a bridal shower tonight, then off to visit friends for the weekend... my poor friend that has a brother, who is married with 2 kids, has decided that he should have been born a woman and is having a sex change.... Friend is a teensy stressed as you can imagine and now refers to her brother/sister as a brister... did I mention that she has also been trying to get pregnant for 7 months as is really starting to worry that something is wrong. If you girls can think back that far to when everyone kept saying you are fine, it takes time and all you want to do is scream at them.... like I said a teense stressed.

Shimmy and a Shake,
Steph

[lolajones]

Hey m'laydees
I am alive, alive-oh.
This is just a quickie to say howdee. Have been keeping an eye on you all from afar. Sorry for not posting - work is just mental busy so I've been staying late then crashing at home with bottles of cava and talking my poor dh into the ground with all my plans. Lithium's what I need.
Littles - hope you're feeling better? Is dh back now? move back to CH!!!
Jen - you're prob driving about in your new car. posing. Flash!
Walsher - I'm going to try acu too, let me know how you find it
camilla - site addict, hope all's going well with the bump
stephanwch - glad all is bueno with mini steph. No surprise trip sadly but Demetrio did take me to local Golden Arches for a hot pocket...
this post is a bit dull eh? Sozza, I'm exhausted, am using far too much brain power at work, need to dial it back a notch.
Promise i will perk up and post more.
Adios chicas!
Lola
xx

[Jen1d]

Hi Chicks

MY MINI IS SSSSOOOOOO COOL.

After nearly two hours of waiting in the garage (they got the paperwork wrong) we were finally allowed to drive off in our mini. It's great fun, don't want to go to my bed, want to keep driving

Still no house for us. Have put in an offer on one but it needs lots done to it and the sellers are holding out for more money so doesn't sound too hopeful.

Loops - Great to see you back. Am getting worried about you. Try and find some hours to chill out girl, you always seem to be running around mad. It's defo living in London that does that, i was the same down there. Get the vino out and lie in the sun.

Steph - Sounds like your your weekend will be interesting. Does your friend know you were struggling to conceive? Might help her to have a chat with you, after all you've got bucket loads of experiece in that field

Littles - How you feeling petal? Hope you dh has made it back and your having a huge bundle of cuddles. Are you managing to do a different activity a day? What you been up too?

Walshy - How's the health goddess doing? I find it so hard to stay healthy all the time and i put weight on as soon as i walk past the supermarket . I was doing well and lost another 3lbs last week but am struggling again. Have been lazy about going to my swimming since dh has been off work after his op but am determined to start again next week when he goes back. It's sloppy really, we just like being together when we're not at work. Have to lose a stone before my op, it's soooooo hard though. Keep up the good work, it will all be worth it when you pop back into your skinny jeans easily after your baby arrives

Camilla - How you doing? Still suffering with the heat down South? Get some fans on, feet up, read a book and chill.

Met our friends in Starbucks today with their baby. She woke up and they asked if i wanted to hold her. I said we had to go, left them, then nearly burst into tears in the shopping centre. I always feel paranoid they feel obliged to let me hold her. We are always so relaxed with the baby but i always think they must be feeling sorry for me as i don't have my own baby and thats why they ask. Its probably nonsence and i know i'm being stupid but i can't help it. They have asked us to babysit for them tomorrow, which is fine, i love spending time with the baby but when i leave i always feel so empty and long for my own child. The hardest thing is we were planning a baby a long time before them and they have everything we want now. Do you think i should talk to her about this or will it make things worse if she asks me to hold the baby again?Is this ever going to happen for us, will we ever have our own baby? I would love to see what our baby would look like and am desperate to give my dh a gorgeous bundle of joy.
LIFE IS A ***** .
Thanks for my little burst of emotion girls, haven't had one in a while and feel better knowing i can chat to you guys about it as you understand so much.

Away to my bed to pass some hours so i can get in my mini again

See Ya

Love Jen x

[little R]

Hey you Octochicks...been away from the screen as DH was home for 48hrs and wanted to make the most of it/him .. he flew off again during the night.

I am keeping busy and today is an "okay" day and I don't feel too miserable

Lola.... yipppeee...great to have you back and glad that you are living it up when you can despite your hectic work schedule. So hope you're enjoying the time off this weekend. You really need a nice/relaxing holiday...when is the next one planned?

Walshy....so have you watched your 2 episodes of Grey's? It's Grey night tomorrow for me and maybe that explains my cheerful mood. I just love Grey's I still haven't got it (sorry brain fried by excessive amount of sun!)... the fact that your AF hasn't shown is not normal right? Or is it? I mean have the doctors given you an idea of when you are to expect the wicked witch's visit? Sorry, don't mean to pry or upset you, but am just wondering... I can't believe how stoic you are and courageous. I would be a right wreck what with the green clippings beverage...I would have gone round the bend with all the waiting. I am wishing AF to turn up for you so you can start your cycle You certainly sound healthy and positive ...ready to embrace your BFP

Steph... you lucky girl ... but well deserved...I see vacation looming on the horizon...Good luck to your friend....poor thing...sounds like rough emotional times for her. Tell us more about the bridal shower Tell me what books you are planning on reading? Any recommendations?
You'd LOVE vacationing here then.... swimming in the Arabian Gulf is like being in a bath (104°F, 40°C) and our swimming pool is still not being cooled properly and was probably around 35°C/95°F.....yuck I say I also hate swimming in cold water...but there are limits

Camilla....thanks for the mantra "everything will be all right"... I said that to my DH when he came home after his long stint in Oz/NZL... he thought I was pregnant as AF was 6 days late. I let myself begin to believe the day I went to the clinic for the scan...they obviously did a HPT and naturally it came out BFN... I honestly think I didn't test myself because I didn't want to know it was BFN and didn't want to cope with it in addition to the disappointment that I couldn't begin my FET in July... So DH thought it may be a BFP and was really upset when he came back....so was I to be honest. Anyway... "our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." I am trying to hold on to that ...and that the strongest people aren't always the people who win, but the people who don't give up when they lose. I hope you are enjoying a nice sunny Sunday with your feet up... you are so close to meeting your little bundle...

Jen, love!! WOW... you rule... in your Mini... I am so happy for you...you SO deserve it!!!! You'll find your home soon, I am sure of it. Concerning your friends...you're not being silly or paranoid...just "normal" and sensitive. It's only natural to feel empty once you have finished babysitting for your friends. I admire you because I couldn't do it...I am way too emotional and whilst it would be great doing babysitting, afterwards it would be too hard to leave. Please disregard as I am in rambling mode.. but I firmly believe that friends cannot understand what they have not had to go through. Most of our friends with children have no idea what "wanting" a child means.... what you feel when every atom in your body is screaming out for a child... Naturally, they cannot understand what they don't know, but the majority can be very compassionate about your situation. I think if she's a compassionate friend you should tell her how you feel....she can't blame you for being honest and trying to explain your situation/feelings.
Where have you been driving with your mini? Going on a mini-mini break soon?

Much love to all you Octogals,

Little R

[Jen1d]

Hi Little R - Thanks for listening and giving such good advice.

All went well at the babysitting, kept looking into her cot and wishing she was mine. Only had to get her up at 10pm, give her a bottle then back to the land of ZZZZZ again, she was an angel. Had to fight back the tears though when my dh fed her the bottle. Just wish ssssooo much that i can see him doing that to our baby. Guilt, guilt guilt it doesn't get any easier and i just keep telling myself that IT WILL WORK but i never feel very convinced.
Our life feels like it is on hold at the moment and just wishing the months away (and my life) until we can try again. Others don't have a clue how we feel and never will.

My car is brill, can't get enough of it and feel sorry for my Astra, its getting neglected will take that to work tomorrow

Sorry i have been feeling a bit sorry for myself over the last two days, is that why everyones is staying away Come back please, i will smile now

Hope you've all had a good weekend

Love Jen x

[Walshy]

Hi,

Well i finally have a date set for my next Drs appointment on the 26 July...... Yay!!! Round 3 here we come.... Seeing as though AF has still not arrived I am going to go to a local Drs surgery and get a blood test just by Stephamiracle I am up the duff. If not then I will take tablets to make myself bleed so I am all cleaned out for my next cycle which my Gyno would have made me do anyways so that way I will be all ready to rock and roll.

Jen your mini finally arrived that is excellent. So does it still have that nice new car smell (I love that smell) Are you now volunteering to go to the shops etc so you can drive it. Do you have a name for her/him yet. How is your house hunting going. Oh my god I love asking questions!! 1 thing to cross off your list of the car then you can move forward and get the house and then the baby. I do not know how you can look after someone elses child i would go crazy. I barely hold it together when people tell me they are pregnant. When friends have new children I never ask for a hold or touch the baby as I find it too difficult.

Lola where are you chikita......Do we need an intervention? You need to come back and enlighten us with you tales.

Little - Dont think you are being intrusive in asking me questions. I suffer from PCOS and a part of that sydnrome is that I do not get AF. Even when I was on the contraceptive pill I didn't get AF. I usually only get her once a year if that and then they are horrendous as it is months of build up waiting to come out. OK I watched Greys yesterday and it was where the 5 IVF babies have just been born and it is on again tonight so I won't have to wait long until my next fix. There is a lady on a PCOS site that I am a part of and she had 1 egg put back and is now having 4 babies. She is now in hospital as she is already 20 weeks and they want to moniter her. Can you imagine 4 at once!!!

Camilla Have you started to wind down ready for the big arrival. Have you got your bag packed ready to go? Are you going to have aplan of attack to get the baby out or take it as it comes. After the accupuncute I found my body tingling and couldn't sleep but I found it so relaxing while I was there.

Steph are you counting down the days until your holiday or is your body already in holiday mode. I love holidays and am constantly looking up the net for cheap ones that maybe my DH and I can go on. Have you got stuff worked out for when you are on holidays like smutty novels and movies that involve no thinking?

I go to another session of accupuncture on Wednesday which I am looking forward to. I also have lost a total of 9 pounds so am doing OK in those stakes, Would have liked to have lost more but been having house guests so have not been eating as healthily or exercising. I brought my husband a book about a mans eye view on IVF written by an Australian guy. It was very funny i started and finished it yesturday because I could relate to it. Little you should get your husband to pick up a copy when he is in Oz next time.
Talk to all soon, Walshy

[little R]

Grrrrreat news Walshy.... bring on the BIG 3....hey miracles can happen (but just not to me !), have you not done a HPT to see whether you are up the duff?? I can't imagine only have AF once a year.... gosh... how do you know where you are in your cycle? Sorry for the silly questions. Anyway, grrreat news and I am so pleased for you.... I have noted down your appointment date. I so hope we will be cycling together but I think I have it easy compared to you...hardly any drugs this time around! Please give me the title of the book.... I am sure my DH will be headed back to Oz soon...he seems to have at least one trip down there a month. You're so lucky...you're ahead of me in Grey's...argh! It's on tonight, so I am a happy bunny! I can't imagine having 4 babies at once...what are the odds...how's that even possible.... they are identical quadruplets???? She has caught up on all the years spent trying


Jen....never say you are sorry about how you feel.... anyway, there is a good chance that one of us is feeling that way that day too We are not staying away because of you!!!! Once again, I am with Walshy on this one...I can't deal with the "good news" let alone even hold a baby... I certainly couldn't watch DH hold one...way too painful... you're very brave. How does your DH feel about seeing you hold one? I know what you mean about waiting for time to pass...I am like that too and it's so wrong. I often think about our good friend who was killed early 2005 (she was my age) and wonder what she would think if she saw me waiting around until IT happened! It's a waste of a life too.
Don't neglect your Astra (we had one way back in CH - happy memories) but enjoy your Mini!

For my other pals... hope you have enjoyed your weekend and will be back on the boards with us soon. Lola, try not to work too hard..you're scaring us ! Camilla, feet up and enjoy your last few weeks of time when you will be able to post Steph, what are you up to? sitting in front of your screen counting down the days until your fun time!

Love ya all,

Little R

[Jen1d]

Walshy and Littles
Thanks for your advice, i don't know how i manage either with other peoples kids. Have always looked after everyone elses but never my own. Yes its harder now as i know i cant have them but what can i do, cant avoid our friends until i get pregnant, that would be too selfish on dh. Just have to get on with it and keep hoping for a miracle - WE WILL ALL GET THERE SOON

Brilliant news about the July 26th date Walshy - bring on that BFP

Hi to all the stragglers this weekend, come back we miss you

Off on a sleepover, will catch up tomorrow

Love Jen x

[Jen1d]

Come out and play

Will try tomorrow.

Love Jen x

[Jen1d]

Hi Girls

Can you read 'Any Info on Closing Tubes' in the General Forum and let me know what your thoughts are. I'm so confused about my op now and don't know if getting my tubes removed is the best option.

Can't go making decisions without the help and advice of my Buds .

Thanks girls

Love Jen x

[little R]

Hey there Jen....as you seem to be the only one online.... sorry for the delay and abandonment (DH home and not getting my precious online time in!).

I am sorry dearest Jen. I am not sure what to advise and I don't believe I am in a position to help you with this as I don't have all the info.
I'll put my money on Miss Lola - she's a safe bet...perhaps you can get a PM off to her. She seems to have a truck load of info and sound advice in medical matters
The only thing I can say is that every case is different and what works for some may not be the best solution for you. Yes, we want to hear other success stories, but, at the end of the day, this journey is physically an individual one (even if we have things in common) and as we have complex bodies, a case-by-case scenario.
Do you trust your doc? S/He's been with you on your journey up until now..... s/he should know what is best for you... I know we shouldn't have blind faith but we have to trust something! I know it's tough but can't you talk with your doctor about the pros and the cons?
Even if on the phone... for you to understand all your options and the resulting advantages and disavantages.

Poor Jen....what a decision to make... luckily, you still have time before the 16th. Try and get ahold of that bonny lass of a Lola

You take care and really sorry that I cannot be of more assistance.

I hope Lola answers quickly...

Lots of virtual hugs to get rid of the awful feeling of confusion.

Much love to you

Little R

[Jen1d]

Hi Littles

Thanks for your support. I called the Doc this morning and to answer your question, yes she is lovely but i always feel i am being a pest if i call. I do trust her but have some doubts as there are so many in the hosp i feel like it's "next please" some times.
Anyway she informed me that on the day of the op i will talk to the consultant and she will advise me of my options. This all sounds great but i was told that i would be having my tube out and can decide if i want both removed, that was it. Now since talking to a few girls on the other thread i have learnt i can have them clamped to stop the fluid getting into my uterus. The Docs never told me this and now i feel p***ed off with them.
Anyway to cut a long story short i can either get my tubes removed or clamped. Asked the Doc what would be the best solution and she said it depends what they find when they start the op!!! How can i make a decision then when i've been put under anisthetic????

Feel so fed up now and don't know what to do?? Just want this to be over with and get on with the ivf. It's taking so long, i hate my body

Sorry for the rant, am just miserable

Hope your all ok, come back for a chat soon, am lost without your advice and you help me pass the months away.

Dr Loopy, i need your help

Love Jen x

[little R]

Hang in there Jen.... I understand your frustration....it's just not on all these uncertainties and questions... "what they will find" isn't that a little vague. If it were a little more clear cut, you could have 2 scenarios ready depending on their findings the day of the op....
You poor thing... I know you just want to get back in the IVF saddle and have your baby...
I feel for you... don't apologise about the rant.. I can relate with the "I hate my body" syndrome.
Hang in there my sweet Octopal.... wishing that Dr Loppy gets back and can help you with her knowledge.... her brain is afterall (according to Steph) the size of London by now

Gotta dash...need to tend to DH...BUT will be back tomorrow morning to read/post...
YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! although I am useless in this situation!

Virtual hugs on their way.....

Love,

Littles

[camilla]

Hi girls

Sorry, sorry, sorry for not being around this week. I was out Mon and had a friend here on Tues and yesterday I just didn't get the time to catch up!

Jen - I've read your posts re your op and I know you feel you've not been given all the info but of course the consultant doing the op will have to assess the situation when he has a look. Have you met him? You have to trust that he will do the best by you.
I would speak to your friend with the baby if I were you about your feelings. She is bound to understand as she is obviously a good friend.
You've got a lot going on at the moment with your house hunting, op etc but it will all come together. I'm glad your car has arrived and you're enjoying whizzing around.

Little R - We're half way through July so not too long till your turn! Oh, I can imagine how you and your DH were feeling whilst waiting for AF to turn up. I have sent a witchy spell over the waters to persuade your next visitor to arrive on time!

Walshy - Well done, you've got a start date! Great about your weight loss too!

Girls, I've remembered that Magnesium is an important mineral for fertility. Might be worth taking a supplement (I did on my accupuncturist's advice). I think it's good for the quality of your eggs.

Steph - Hope the tiredness soon lifts. I definitely started feeling more energetic by week 16. And I stopped taking progesterone by week 12 as by then your body is in control of that. Hope you have a happy holiday - when?

Lola - Busy girl! Holiday time for you soon!

Wasn't as long a message as I wanted to write but at least it's a start! Going to have my lunch now and finish putting the shopping away etc.

Lots of love as always.

Camilla xxxxx

[little R]

Hey Octopals...hope you are all doing well...

Just come back from the swimming pool....it's broken again (no cool water)...it must be over 45°C in there....yuck!! Anyway....

Glad to have you back Camilla. Hope things are well with the "bump"... you're getting so close...sorry when is exact due date? Sorry, brain fried!

Jen, hope you are feeling better and a good night's rest managed to make you feel happier. Thinking of you...

Lots of love to all,

Little R