The Over 40 Crowd

[AMck]

Hi Ladies, happy Saturday. Hope everyone Ok today.

Hi to Kat. How are things with you? Hasn't the weather been awful the past few days here? I think Summer has really gone now Do you have any plans for holidays and stuff? I think about you often x

Hi Bev, thanks for pm. Glad to see the scan went well....and a boy! Many congrats. If ours is a boy we will name him Matthew after my father who sadly passed away last year. Popular names at school all begin with J. Jacob, Jake, James, Jack ,and we have what seems to be about a hundred Joshuas!! Good luck with deciding...it's soooo exciting!

Tammy, how are you? How was the scan? Hope all went well. Andrew James sounds lovely. The weeks seem to be flying by now.

Hi to Yasmina, are you showing yet? Hope you are well.

Kat(2) hope you are Ok. Thinking of you. What is your next step?

As for me....absolutely shattered...could sleep for a week! Had late night meetings at school on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday, so had sister and brother over for a meal on Wednesday to share our news. They were thrilled and very very suprised!
I told my headteacher yesterday and must admit was quite upset by her reaction... she said congratulations but her smile didn't quite reach her eyes.Then she started talking about what the Governors might say and how she wanted me to keep it quiet as long as possible as I played such a key role in the school (I'm Deputyhead) Ofsted is due soon and she is very twitchy about it. AARRGGHH... needless to say I then told all the staff!!!My friends at work were screaming and shouting and there were lots of 'I don't believe it!' A few of them cried!! It was wonderful to know how many people were happy for us.

I'm off now...my sister has promised to take me shopping and we are going to buy everything we see!!

Hugs to all here
Bye for now
Anna x

[teachertam]

Happy Saturday Ladies:

Anna: I am so very happy for you! It is wonderful that you have so many friends and family that genuinely care for you! I hope you have fun shopping. It is fun to shop for baby things. When do you have your next scan? I can't wait to find out the sex of your baby. I wonder if you will also have a boy like Bev and I.

We had our scan on Thursday and I asked the sonographer to confirm his sex. She said to us, "there is one leg, there's the other and there is his third leg. The little guy had his winky sticking straight up. Everything on the ultrasound looked good. All measurements were right on track. The only thing that they found was an "Intracardiac Echogenic Foci" on his heart. They call it a "bright spot". The doctor said that it should not impact his heart and that it should continue to develop normally. She did say however, that this condition sometimes indicates an increased risk for downs syndrome. She also said that she personally had never seen a baby with just this condition (and nothing else) have downs. I was a little upset so we decided to have the 2nd trimester screening (quad marker test). The doctor said that we could have the amnio test if we wanted to but DH and I decided that since it is invasive and could cause a miscarrige to forgo it. Having the amnio would not change anything for us. We would not abort! Hopefully, our second trimester blood screening will come back good. The results from our 1st trimester screening were very good. My risks of having a baby with downs is only 1:820. I love this little guy and would do nothing to jeopardize him. Being an engineer, I of course, have been doing research on this condition. There are studies with various results. Some studies seem to indicate that this condition by itself should not increase your risks of downs, but others say it does. I'm just going to pray that my little guy is born healthy.

Bev: I hope everything is going well with you. I thought I felt something moving last night in bed, but I'm not for sure.

Hello to everyone else.

Have a nice day,
Tammy

[children]

Once a week online checking how you all doing is all I can afford for now. It is quite amazing week for everyone. In general, our site becomes so exciting since so many of us from struggling to enjoying the preg now. I hope the ones are on their way to get babies are all encouraged by us.

Bev, baby name picking time, yell, I love it. I do not have any clue how to name boys, but I am against any names started with w, x, y, and z, because my name start with y and my last name start with x, whenever I register for things, my name comes the last. Now I am working in a group with someone last name starting with Z, I am saved, finally. Anyway, the boy’s name that I do not like is Jack, because I have dated two Jacks, while both of them are exceptionally smart, they are also extremely lazy.

Tammy, Andrew James, lovely, I like it! I am glad that you and your hubby picked out name already. BTW, you won’t believe it, Tammy, you and I must have linked somehow in our previous lives, because I had my 19 weeks scan Oct. 4 and my baby’s heart has also a “bright spot”, which give a slight possibility of Down Syndrome. My OB told me exactly the same thing as your OB, I am not joking, exactly, every word of it! We decided to ignore what we know and let the nature takes care the rest.

Second piece of news of mine is that we are having a girl – as I guessed it, now we know how to name our baby. I proposed to my hubby to name her Anna, he said, sounds good, but I need to think about it some more. I can not name my baby with a E, because my hubby’s last name starts with E, not F, either because I do not want her to have the same initial as the daddy.

Anna, we may use your name, that was the only name came to my mind when I confirmed my baby’s sex. I forgot lingling, dongdong at that moment. My bump is not announcing anything to strangers, still. My hubby said because I swim too often. I swim twice a week only, 30 min each – 1K, not so much. Books said we should excise 30 min/day, I can not find that much time, I wish I could though.

Lisa, you still have a chance to name my little girl, if you like. I may pick Mia to be the middle name, if you do not mind. I am glad that you and your hubby dealing with all the issues so well, enjoy your new well-paid job.

Well, to everyone else that comes here to chat, good luck on what you are doing and you all will get what we really wanted in the end!

Yasmina

[teachertam]

Yasmina:

It is very good to hear from you. Congrats on your little girl!! Wow, we must be linked. We are like you in that we are going to hope for the best, regarding the bright spot on our baby's heart. You can always use Annalise for your daughter's name. I won't be needing the name anymore, as our adopted daughter from China has already been named Elena. Anna Mia sounds good too.

Well, I need to get back to work, as I need to post exam grades for my classes.

Regards,
Tammy

[BevT]

Hi girls,

Well you just won't believe it, but our baby also has a "bright spot" on his heart! I did'nt mention it after our scan as the sonographer and consultant both said that is was nothing to worry about. They said it is quite common and does not give them cause for concern, particularly as it was not accompanied by any other "soft markers". If however, there were other markers, then they would have considered it more seriously, but on it's own, they are not at all worried. Of course, now they have told me that, I am a little concerned, but we too do not want to go down the road of invasive diagnostic tests. We shall all have to pray that our three babies are okay, and born healthy and happy. Our sonographer did say that it is so common and nothing to worry about that some clinics don't even bother to mention it to patients. In a way, I wish they had not told me either!

Yasmina, how lovely that you are having a little girl, if the truth be known, I was hankering after a girl if I had a preference. Either way, it doesn't really matter to me, but given a choice! I think there are so many lovely things out there for little girls, easier to dress, and easier to name.

I am swimming 4 times a week, swimming 1k each session, and my bump is huge!! I guess we are all different in the end.

Tammy, after I felt the first initial movements, I found I could feel them more readily when I was sitting up (usually when sat at the table or the pc). I think it is because you are a bit more restricted, as opposed to lying down when everything has more space! You will soon be feeling movement every day now.

Anna, I am glad that you told the rest of your staff! Who does your head think she is, asking you to keep such wonderful news under wraps? You go girl, and tell the world if you want to. Hope you had a great day shopping with your sister - what did you buy?

Well that's all from me now. Hi to everyone else here,

Bev xxx

[teachertam]

Bev: I have been doing some research on the topic of "bright spots" and it seems that since none of us have any other markers for downs, our risks should not increase. These "bright spots" must be more common than we know. I believe that not all sonographers will pick them up, as it depends on how powerful their equipment is. We will have to pray that all of our little babies will be born healthy. I did go ahead and have the 2nd trimester quad test. It is just a blood test to increase the accuracy of the 1st trimester test. I guess the 1st trimester test has an 85% accuracy and when the 2nd trimester test is also done, you get a 91% accuracy. I have been taking a spinning class (stationary bike) at the YMCA twice a week and my bump is pretty big too. I think i look more like 5.5 - 6 months pregnant. I hope I can feel the little guy soon. I thought I felt him the other night, but maybe I didn't.

Take care all,
Tammy

[teachertam]

Hello Ladies:

I received very good news today, regarding my 2nd trimester screening results. My risks of having a baby with Downs Syndrome went from 1:820 to 1:5700 !!!!!!!! I am so relieved. My genetic counselor reiterated that they do not normally worry about Intracardiac Echogenic Foci, unless there are other positive markers from Downs.

Bev & Yasmina: If you have not had this 2nd trimester screening, I would recommend it for peace of mind. It is just a blood test.

Take care all,
Tammy

[Sonix]

Hi Ladies,

Sorry I haven’t been around for a while. Must be ages since I last posted but have been checking in to read how everyone is getting on from time to time. It’s great to see how well so many of you are doing.

Not much news from me really. After the last cycle was cancelled in July I was quite devastated. We arranged an appointment to try and find out where we are. We got lots of answers to our questions which was good but I didn’t end up feeling much less mixed-up. Basically the doc confirmed that my ovaries are the problem, i.e. not my tubes, so no HSG test. He is very impressed with the one embryo I had transferred in May. It was a top-of-the-grade, 1A embryo so that’s a hope we have to hang on to. But because I don’t respond to the follistims (only one follicle in 3 attempts) he doesn’t feel we should try IVF more than one more cycle. I should go in for a scan on cycle day 3 and to check hormone levels etc. so that he can decide on how to proceed.

In the meantime we’ve been on holiday and then another business trip came up, so although we've decided to go ahead, start of next treatment has been postponed. At the moment I feel so under pressure from work and somehow just not prepared for what’s to come. I think more than anything I’m scared because we have to get off this rollercoaster of IVF eventually and this next go will probably be our last try. Our doc has started mentioning donor eggs and adoption, and I know it’s time for us to be making more major decisions soon…
Anyway, AF finally arrived again yesterday so I was at the clinic this morning for a scan and blood test. I have to call them on Monday but looks like I will be on BCP first, so at least I’ll have a bit more time to get myself mentally and physically in shape. I have joined a yoga course, so there's a start.

Sorry to be so depressing when I really only wanted to call in again to say hello. Tuning in when I can does help me keep positive and give me courage to keep going.

Anna, I’m very happy for you being able to tell everyone your good news at last - forget your headteacher. Although I must admit it was nice too, to be in on your big secret for the last few months.

Special big hugs also to Kat, Bev, Tammy, Lisa and Yasmina and hi and good luck to everyone belonging to this thread.

Have a great weekend everyone and keep the good news coming!

Bye for now
Sonia xxx

[teachertam]

Sonia,

It was good to hear from you. My fingers will be crossed for your next cycle. I always had to take the BCP between cycles also. My RE did not think my tubes were the problem either, but I still had a HSG test. I think it cleans your tubes and uterus out. My tubes were not plugged. I don't know if it had any bearing on my pregnancy, but it definitely did not hurt things. I would be hopeful too, since you had such a nice embryo last time. My doctor was very hopeful for us also, since during my 2nd IVF we were transferring 5 embryos with 2 being expanded blastocysts. We were waiting for my AF to begin so that we could proceed with a frozen cycle (we had 4 eggs in the freezer from IVF #2). Well, we never had to proceed with the frozen cycle, as I became pregnant naturally!! We believe our pregancy was a miracle.

Good luck,
Tammy

[AMck]

Hi Ladies, happy Saturday.Hope everyone enjoying their weekend.

Sonix, really good to see you post. Wishing you loads of luck with this next cycle. Hang in there. Dreams DO come true!

Tammy, great news from your screening results. You must be absolutely delighted. Well done you!

Bev, hi, try not to worry, if the consultant said it is nothing to worry about, then there is nothing to worry about. Sending you relaxing thoughts...thinking of you x

Hi Yasmina, glad to see you are in good spirits. Anna sounds like a good name to me!!

As for me.....well the word is spreading around friends and family and we have congratulations cards lining the window sill. I had no idea how thrilled people would be for us. I have one more week until half term then a major shopping spree will begin! I have an appointment with the midwife on 26th Oct, then a scan on 23rd November, they seem so far apart!!! But I am feeling fine and can still just fit into my clothes..not for much longer

Really good to be able to chat to you guys, hoping all is Ok with everyone. Hugs to all
Anna x

[BevT]

Hi everyone, nearly couldn't find our "page", but then scrolled down far enough and there you all were. Things are very quiet at the moment - waiting for my mid-wife to call today (on her way home) and check me over. I am going to speak to her about the second tri screening, but not sure if I am so far along now that I won't bother. I suppose it might put my mind at rest if it comes back like Tammy's, but then if it doesn't it may just increase my anxiety. Apart from that, just swimming most days and trying to drum up enthusiasm to do some housework!

Tammy have you felt your little miracle moving yet. I bet you have by now, even if it is just a tiny tickle.

Anna, life must be quite exciting at the moment, spreading your good news to all and sundry. I too am looking forward to half -term. DH has been back to work with a vengeance, just spent the last 4 days on a "Service Weekend" with his brood in the Lake District. He got home 11pm last night absolutely shattered, they break up on Saturday morning, then Sunday pm he is off to Germany for another 3 days to take them all on a visit to the Audi factory. Not my idea of fun, but hey I guess if you are interested in design? At least this term he gets a fortnight off, so to lose a few days in Germany isn't the end of the world. Have you got anything planned for your half-term, other than a spending spree with your sister!

Sonia, nice to hear from you again. I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you with this next cycle. I know that you are not ready to contemplete donor treatment just yet, but if you get there in the end, Anna and I will be glad to help you with any information or questions you may have. It is a hard journey to cross over to the DE side of things, I found it difficult to give up on my own eggs, but faced with no other way forward, we can help you along if you would like. Let's wait and see how you get on with this cycle - after all it could be the one!! Good luck Son. x

Well, that's all for me now, hi to everyone else who visits.

Bev xxx

[Kat]

Hi all, nice to hear from you Sonia & hope all goes well with your tmt. Glad to see all the pg ladies are doing fine with the tests & everything, how exciting to start seeing a bump!

A question for you all – my periods are gradually getting lighter and the time between them is getting shorter – down to about 25 days – has it been brought on by all the drugs or does this happen to all women? Anyone got any thoughts?

I went to the doctor about a load of silly stuff and she said ‘oh you’re probably just perimenopausal’. This upset me no end, which was stupid really as the chances of a natural pregnancy for me are just about nil but still, there’s always that slim chance…. as proven by some of you here. And I’m only 41.

I looked up perimenopause and it can start 15 years before menopause so it’s not about to happen tomorrow but still, I see it as the start of the slippery slope to having that final line drawn under everything fertility-wise.

So why does this worry me so much? Does this mean I am not actually ready to call it a day? In a dream last night I was pg so it’s obviously back at the front of my mind. I don’t think I could face going through tmt again….could I?

aaargghh! Help!

Kat xx

PS I have started taking evening primrose capsules

[jen babes]

Just popped into say hi...

Kat
I was called perimenopausal when i had AF's all over the place at 36 by my gyno .... It jsut means the hormone levels are changing and as you said it can take another 15-20 years before it fully kicks in.

At the moment i too have been having 23-25 day periods all lighter then they have ever been and have been asking myself is this the tmt or is it me??? One of my friends ( a youngy at 35 ) is having the same problems. I don't have any answers but i just wanted you to know you are not alone.

In the dreams department...i have woken up smelling and feeling the imprint of a newborne baby girl in my arms... Many times over the last 3 yrs, especially when conemplating the next tmt. makes me cry buckets but clears my heart and head to focus on what i want to do.

I feel as a woman i will always feel that nurturing instinct wanting to kick in...It feels like sometimes it's my ''howling at the moon '' ...if you know what i mean, a deep longing.

My other friend who's 57 and never married ( though many male partners) says she still feels it that deep longing...to have a child of her own. Though she knows now it will never happen but she has never tried either and still feels it.

Anyway i thought i'd just say hi and let you know i feel something similar too...hope it helps a little

love jen
xxx

[AMck]

Hi ladies
It's quiet here this week. I hope everyone OK

Kat, I'm sorry I don't know much about lighter periods etc...but I did feel that your dr was a tad unsympathetic. Is she aware of all you have been through? You sound like you are wavering and maybe considering further tmt? You are in my thoughts and prayers (Everytime I visit my friend in Chessington I wonder if you are nearby!!)

Bev, hi, how are things? Has your bump grown loads? I too am considering the 2nd tri screening, aahhgg ...the decisions and the worrying ...will it ever stop!!! You sound like you are enjoying life at the moment. Glad to see dh has some time off. What will you do? After my shopping spree with my sister, dp and I are off to the Lake District to see some friends and do a little walking. I realy can't wait, this term seems to be never ending.

Hi to Jen, good to see you post. How are you? Feel free to pop in anytime!

Hugs to all here
Bye for now
Anna x

[teachertam]

Hello Ladies:

Bev: No, I'm still not sure if I have felt my little guy moving. I do feel pulling and tugging, but I'm not definite if I am feeling my little guy. I go tomorrow to my OB dr. for a check-up. I'm not scheduled for an ultrasound, but he will listen to his heartbeat. The 2nd trimester screening is just a blood test, so if you think it will make you feel better, go for it. I'm glad I did it.

Anna: I'm glad that we went ahead and had the 2nd trimester screening. It does make me feel alot better.

Kat: I'm sorry to hear that your doctor is not sympathetic to your situation. I do not know anything about shortening periods. Maybe you are not supposed to "call it a day", regarding having a baby. You are only 41 and that is not too old. You are in my prayers.

Jen: It is good to hear from you. When is your next cycle?

Hello to Yasmina, Sonix, Lisa and all other ladies.

Take care all,
Tammy