I'm back home after ectopic - have a few questions

Clara 1 · Post by **Clara 1** » Mon Sep 15, 2003 4:13 pm

Hello again all A very belated thanks to all who sent me lovely kind messages a few weeks ago after my 7 week scan showed there was nothing in my womb. Thanks so much, they were a great help. It turned out that I was ectopic and I spent a week in hospital, and am now off work for 6 weeks. I think work will have forgotten who I am by the time I get back - I've only had one day there since early July! Feeling a little better now, tho have a long new wound - I have a lot of adhesions so they had to make a big cut. I still feel absolutely exhausted all the time but gradually getting there. Mentally, I am better than I would have expected to have been. It's been such a sad time, but we are coming through OK. We've had great support from family and friends. Although DH's best mate's wife is about to give birth, and my best friend told me last week that she is 14 wks pregnant. I would only have been 3 weeks behind her. She felt so bad about telling me, but didn't want to keep it a secret from me. I'm very happy for her, but I know you all know what it feels like! I'm sorry I haven't posted on the site recently, for not having supported you. So much has happened to you all, so to all of you who have had good news, I am delighted for you, and for those who have suffered, my heart goes out to you and I send you lots of love. Also have a few questions for you! I want to have my remaining tube tied or clamped. I couldn't bear to risk another ectopic. Can any of you tell me how soon after having a tube clamped or tied or whatever is done you can start treatment again? Is it a fairly small procedure, and how much more time will I have to take off work??!! Also anyone know about costs? One more, I haven't had an AF yet since the treatment, tho bled lightly for a week after the operation - how long can it be before a proper AF? I'm keen to have another go as soon as I am able. Well, won't ramble on anymore. This site was such a lifeline during the treatment, so many many thanks to everyone. Good luck to you all, whatever stage you are at and lots of love Claire xx

Alison · Post by **Alison** » Mon Sep 15, 2003 6:17 pm

Hi Claire, welcome back - gosh what a time you've been through. Glad to hear you sounding so upbeat and strong. What difficult timing with your best friend though - if you're anything like me it'll be hard to share her pregnancy without thinking of your lost baby too. She sounds like a good sensitive friend though. In answer to your question, having a tube clipped should be a fairly minor procedure, taken out is slighty more major (I had one of mine clipped last Spring, and then (when the clipping hadn't had the desired effect) both tubes removed this summer. Both times it was day surgery. I went back to work about 4 days after they did the clip. When I had the tubes out I took 2-3 weeks off, but must admit I felt a bit of a skiver towards the end of that period (but it was sunny so what the hell!) I think I've managed to block out the costs! I'd guess around £2k in total including hospital, payment to the surgeon and anaesthetist. After having the tube clipped I think I waited til AF, then started downregging 3 weeks later. After the removal I had an FET, and it was 2 AFs from the op to doing the FET. Hope all that helps. You look after yourself, and lots of love and luck for what lies ahead. Alison x

Clara 1 · Post by **Clara 1** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 8:20 pm

Hiya Alison Lovely to hear from you, and thanks for the info. I've not spoken to the clinic since I went into hospital so will ring them, now that I know a little more. How are you getting on? Have you any plans for the next go? Hope you're well, and that the summer has been ok for you. Love, Claire x

kathryn · Post by **kathryn** » Wed Sep 17, 2003 8:52 pm

hi claire and alison too! sorry to hear youve been so unwell claire, I remember your posting after you went for your scan. Im really sorry to hear it was an ectopic pregnancy. you poor thing, what a horrible time youve been through. I cant help with your questions, but its been 6 weeks since we mc and Ive still not af arrive, but the doctor said thats normal. with all the tmts we go through there unfortunately doesnt seem to be a norm. take care over the next 6 weeks you have away from work. youre obviously keen to have another go and i wish you both all the best. and alison! please let us know how you are and what your plans are. sending you both lots of love kathryn x

Alison · Post by **Alison** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 4:26 pm

Claire, Kathryn, good to hear from you both again. Things are fine with me. Been back a couple of weeks now from a wonderful holiday and have been busy catching up with work and friends, playing squash again after far too long a break, and generally trying to get on with life. Having had the usual, not terribly helpful follow up appointment before going away, I got a call last week recommending I had the natural killer tests (the expensive ones). As this'll be our last go we thought we may as well, so yesterday had £830 worth of blood tests!! What happens next will depend on what they find. I've had 2 low positives on previous attempts, so think there's a fair chance they'll find something, but who knows?! AF is due any day, so I'll go and have day 2 blood tests done too, and then when the results come back from the NK tests in a couple of weeks I'll know whether I can start in October or will have to wait longer. As long as its out the way before Christmas I'm in no desperate rush to start again, and still enjoying some time out. I couldn't believe it on another thread that Kat had got to e/t already! I hope that you're both doing OK. I guess that we're all haunted by the "if only"s but it must be that much harder for you. Wishing you all the very best, love Alison x

Tracey S · Post by **Tracey S** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 6:06 pm

Claire I find it hard to post at the moment having lost our precious baby at 20 weeks last week but thought it might help. I had my first IVF last September and bingo after 12 dayss AF arrived like the tide!!! However 2 weeks after that I had tremendous pain - they made me test and postive. Having TTC for 10 years nearly and two considerably buggered tubes I was over the moon - the scan 2 days later showed an ectopic in my right tube just 2 weeks before I was getting married. To say I was devestated.... well you know don't you. They took out the baby and the tube and I asked them to remove the dam left one at the same time as I didn't want to be down that avenue again - 4 hours later they couldn't do it as it is stuck down to the bowel and I happen to have ulcerative colitis too - they clipped it. I still suffer from hydrosalpinx in the tube but they have always maintained that as is clipped it shouldn't be going anywhere. I had to wait until December/Jan to go again - as they wanted 3 mths to get over it and xmas got in the way. 2nd IVF no go but got some frosties which at 37 yrs old I was very pleased with. 3rd FET - no go and still had fluid in my left tube - 4th bingo and was fine until the 20 week scan - the rest you have no doubt read about and I feel as if my two babies have been cruelly snatched away. Basically the thing to do is to get them removed or clipped - if they really are no good like mine get them removed - not a difficult procedure unless you have the bad luck that follows me around! If not get them clipped but you can still get fluid accumulating - this they reckon is more of an annoyance = ie bloating etc and if they are clipped it will not spill over in to the uterus. Good luck and fight the fight - maybe we will do it together depending on timings. Love Tracey xxx [Edited by Tracey S on 18-Sep-03 11:07]

wales · Post by **wales** » Thu Sep 18, 2003 6:54 pm

hi clara i dont know your full story and condition, but if you can have both tubes removed especially if you are gonna have more treatment. when wifey had her tubes removed after a double ectopic it was only 4 months after and she went on to have a sucsesfull pregnancie. i dont know if you have been told this by the doctors but even if you have the tubes removed there still is a minute chance of ectopic as there will be "stumps" left from the tubes, but its very very rare. keep your chin up girl all the very best wales.

Dawn Blake · Post by **Dawn Blake** » Fri Sep 19, 2003 5:44 am

Dear Claire, Alison and Kathryn, Claire, sounds like you really have been through it, and my thoughts are with you, make the most of the time off and try and rest as much as possible (I am sure that is not too hard at the moment, you must be exhausted?). With regards to tubal clamping/removal - I had my tubes cut (along the length) and clamped in March, and was only `uncomfortable' for a few days, in fact I flew less than a week after surgery, so that gives you an idea how minor the procedure is. I had 2 periods following the surgery before I started treatment, but that was my choice, I could have started sooner, but with holidays planned etc is wasn't convenient for us. I had mine done by Sam at the Lister in Chelsea, and he insisted I claim on my health insurance, as we pay enough for treatments as it is, so he (thankfully) disregarded the fertility side of it and said it was pure gynae and got the claim through fine. In total it was £4,000 (but looking at Alison's, it seems quite excessive). Wishing you a speedy recovery, and all the very very best of luck for the future. Alison/Kathryn, hope things are progressing well with you, sounds like things are definately moving for you Alison, will keep looking in to see how you are doing! Couldn't believe Kat had reached ET either - wow! Take care all of you! D x

Clara 1 · Post by **Clara 1** » Tue Sep 30, 2003 7:35 pm

Thanks once again for all your advice and help - it was so useful and I feel like I know a lot more. Went to the hospital yesterday to see the doctor who did the ectopic operation, (not an IVF person) and he did not think it was worth doing anything to my remaining tube, saying it's 'only a 15% chance of another ectopic pregnancy. Well, with my luck,that sounds quite high! So I'm going to demand it! Thanks Claire x

fi · Post by fi » Thu Oct 02, 2003 1:07 pm

hi claire, i am off at the mo after ectopic, got to 7wks too. i am off for 12wks........ i am confused about the tubing and clipping as being someone who had normal tubes and now missing one feel a bit confused as to what to do next. we have 5 frozen ones so will use those asap, as soon as we can after 3mths i think. anyway just wanted to say hi and lets be buddies!!! luv fi

jssgps · Post by **jssgps** » Fri Oct 03, 2003 7:53 pm

Hi - I am new but thought I would respond. I had to have my remaining tube removed in May because it had become a hydrosalpinx. We did it in preparation for the IVF and they had me wait 2 months before I could start the IVF treatments. Don't know if that helps or not -- and since I am in the States - I don't know if it is the same there or not. Good luck to you though! Gayla

indus · Post by **indus** » Wed Oct 08, 2003 8:21 pm

hi clara, haven't read anyone elses replies as i am jiggered, so sorry now if i am going over old ground. in march this year i had my first ivf, and at 7 weeks had the same sorry crap happen as you, i was so flippen shell shocked as no one had told me about the so called higher risk of it happening, anyway my ectopic ruptured and i had to have the whole tube removed... was chuffed with that as it was one less place for the slippery little buggers to get to next time, but that did leave me in a pickle as i still obviously had another tube left! i did ask the hospital as calmly as i could why they didn't just take both out while they were at it and they said they didn't make a habit of taking out healthy body parts..... well hello, having ivf doesn't that tell you that those body parts are far from healthy?? anyway, my gp wanted me to have my tube clamped but the clinic just thought i was worrying over nothing and if it happened again i could have another shot at the ivf... well gee thanks. well june came and i started treatment agan, and i was crapping myself, was scared that the tmt might not work, knowing i had to go through the 2ww again... but worse than that, if it was poss then the wait till the scan... good god if this tmt isn't hard enough!! well, i had the tmt, i did the 2ww, got a poss and then had to do the painstaking wait to the scan... what a nightmare. thank god i don't have to go through that again... i am currently 14 weeks pg!! ta da. one thing that might sound a bit odd is, i'm glad i had the ectopic as opposed to a neg result, it bloody well proves you have good embryos!! they work!! they stick!! and they grow!! my clinic told me they could do ivf on someone till they were blue in the face and if they had shit embys.. then sadly it would never work. if i could develope a microscopic map and compass do you think there is a fortune out there to be made?? lol take care, good luck on your next tmt, and you have my blessing to worry a bit as it will make me feel more normal!! love tracey xxxx

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