Hi Bekki,
I had the other test too. It's standard for all IVFers in our practice before you can begin. It's totally fine. A little cramping, but from what I understand it's similar to the transfer.
Give yourself some time to mourn. It's natural. Then you'll find yourself gettitng excited for the next round. I'm so happy we have this board! We could get prego in the same month and them follow eachother through pregnancy and birth!!!
egg collection and transfer
I know thanks - I am so glad we are almost chatting at the same time - a real comfort , as I am in the house at the moment alone - hubbie has a business dinner tonight and will not be back until midnight. So this is wonderful. I am gonna break the news to my parents later too. The support I have been receiving from you guys over the last 2 hours since I have had my test back is unbelievable. I will be here everyday without fail.
Bekki xx
Bekki xx
-
jstrandlund
- Regular
- Posts: 131
- Joined: Thu Sep 28, 2006 9:51 pm
- Location: Minnesota
Oh Bekki, my heart is breaking for you. There never are the right words to say when someone gets a BFN other than please know that I am thinking of you, praying for you and having a good cry along with you! Sending you lots of hugs, love and support!!!
Jill
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;11;19/st/20100109/dt/-1/k/9af7/preg.png[/img]
Me 29/DH 29
1st IVF=BFP M/C
2nd IVF=BFN
Femara
4/7/09 Start first cycle
5/4/09 BFP!!
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;11;19/st/20100109/dt/-1/k/9af7/preg.png[/img]
Me 29/DH 29
1st IVF=BFP M/C
2nd IVF=BFN
Femara
4/7/09 Start first cycle
5/4/09 BFP!!
Oh Bekki I'm so so sorry for you. My heart goes out to you both.
I had a laproscopy about 6 years ago. It isn't painful as you are asleep but afterwards it is uncomfortable because of all the air they pump into you, to be honest it isn't much different from how it was after EC. If you've gone through IVF you can go through anything!
I think it's wonderful that your parents are offering to help you with the cost. Please don't feel guilty, at the end of the day they want you to have a family and they want to see their little grandchild. It will make it even more special.
When we saw the fees we worked out how much, but it ended up being a lot more, we didn't take into account how much medication it would be aftwards as well, in total this one cost us around £7,000 and that's not including the train fares to London all the time! We wouldn't put a price on our little ones now so we can't think of the cost but I know what you mean. I don't work only DH.
Take care and I'll be back on later, going for a scan now.
Thinking of you
Jo
xxx
I had a laproscopy about 6 years ago. It isn't painful as you are asleep but afterwards it is uncomfortable because of all the air they pump into you, to be honest it isn't much different from how it was after EC. If you've gone through IVF you can go through anything!
I think it's wonderful that your parents are offering to help you with the cost. Please don't feel guilty, at the end of the day they want you to have a family and they want to see their little grandchild. It will make it even more special.
When we saw the fees we worked out how much, but it ended up being a lot more, we didn't take into account how much medication it would be aftwards as well, in total this one cost us around £7,000 and that's not including the train fares to London all the time! We wouldn't put a price on our little ones now so we can't think of the cost but I know what you mean. I don't work only DH.
Take care and I'll be back on later, going for a scan now.
Thinking of you
Jo
xxx
Me 35 DH 37 1st IVF ET 27 June - BFP!!!!
Ellie was born on 11 December 2006, 14 weeks early!
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/2;54;30/st/20061211/n/Ellie/dt/4/k/0612/age.png[/img]
Ellie was born on 11 December 2006, 14 weeks early!
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/2;54;30/st/20061211/n/Ellie/dt/4/k/0612/age.png[/img]
Jill and Jo - thanks for your posts too. Jo thanks for telling me how the laproscopy will be like - well I will have it done for sure!!!
My list of questions for the doctor is growing longer by the day!
I broke the news to my hubbie and he was not angry. Upset of course, but not angry. He reassured me that I would not lose him to anyone else and that I could be certain of that.
Of course,I woke up this morning thinking I had dreamt about the whole IVF procedure that I have been through. My hubbie gets over things quickly, but for me it will take several weeks, with every day being a healer - well time for me is a healer.
I spoke to my sister for an hour on the phone last night and she was really supportive. I just cannot believe how valuable this board is. It was literally from the moment I got back from the doctors and switched the computer on, that I was in contact with both bubble and VIC for almost 2 hours!! Also when VIC is almost on the other side of the world as me. It has really meant alot that all of you were prepared to help me through this and to help get over receiving the bad news. Each day brings me closer to the doctors appointment on the 21st.
Jo - let us know at some point how the scan went.
Luv Bekki xxx
My list of questions for the doctor is growing longer by the day!
I broke the news to my hubbie and he was not angry. Upset of course, but not angry. He reassured me that I would not lose him to anyone else and that I could be certain of that.
Of course,I woke up this morning thinking I had dreamt about the whole IVF procedure that I have been through. My hubbie gets over things quickly, but for me it will take several weeks, with every day being a healer - well time for me is a healer.
I spoke to my sister for an hour on the phone last night and she was really supportive. I just cannot believe how valuable this board is. It was literally from the moment I got back from the doctors and switched the computer on, that I was in contact with both bubble and VIC for almost 2 hours!! Also when VIC is almost on the other side of the world as me. It has really meant alot that all of you were prepared to help me through this and to help get over receiving the bad news. Each day brings me closer to the doctors appointment on the 21st.
Jo - let us know at some point how the scan went.
Luv Bekki xxx
Hello,
Just popped on quickly to let you know we went for a scan today and we are expecting a girl. The girls are so pleased, the little ones didn't mind what we have as long as it was a girl! So Ellie it is. I'm off shopping now.
Hope the rest of you are ok. Will be on next week to talk to you all properly.
Take care
Jo
xxx
Just popped on quickly to let you know we went for a scan today and we are expecting a girl. The girls are so pleased, the little ones didn't mind what we have as long as it was a girl! So Ellie it is. I'm off shopping now.
Hope the rest of you are ok. Will be on next week to talk to you all properly.
Take care
Jo
xxx
Me 35 DH 37 1st IVF ET 27 June - BFP!!!!
Ellie was born on 11 December 2006, 14 weeks early!
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/2;54;30/st/20061211/n/Ellie/dt/4/k/0612/age.png[/img]
Ellie was born on 11 December 2006, 14 weeks early!
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/2;54;30/st/20061211/n/Ellie/dt/4/k/0612/age.png[/img]
HI Jo - thanks for saying hi! A girl hey? lovely news. Glad all is going well.
Well I am trying for the laproscopy to see what they say. If they say right tube is not blocked then we will try to pregnant naturally with as much assistance from the clinic as possible - they may be able to stimulate my monthly cycles through hormones, whereby we could be sure the right ovary always produces an egg. We have also considered the possibility of adopting a child too, whilst we also try naturally to conceive. It would mean that atleast we have a child and someone to love, at the same time as trying to conceive. It would take the pressure off us too.
Bekki xxxx
Well I am trying for the laproscopy to see what they say. If they say right tube is not blocked then we will try to pregnant naturally with as much assistance from the clinic as possible - they may be able to stimulate my monthly cycles through hormones, whereby we could be sure the right ovary always produces an egg. We have also considered the possibility of adopting a child too, whilst we also try naturally to conceive. It would mean that atleast we have a child and someone to love, at the same time as trying to conceive. It would take the pressure off us too.
Bekki xxxx
Hi - how are you folks doing?
Well today is 21st November - I have got this long awaited follow-up with the doctor to discuss the next steps that will be taken. Appointment is not until 17.40 - so I will not be able to let you know what gets said until tomorrow.
Vic - how is you doing and how is your hubbie - you said he was going to have an operation.
Jill - how are you feeling as you head into early pregnancy?
Jo - hope all is well with you too.
Bubble - not sure if you are still on the boards - but how are things going?
I have really gotten over the BFN now - it took around 12 days to fully recover - but now I am totally back to myself - smiling and happy as normal, which is something I never thought would happen. My husband has gotten over it quick too and he has provided more strength than I ever thought he would. I am also looking forward to being an Aunty in February - my sister is having a baby (of course it worked the first time round with her! ) - atleast if I can never have children I will have many nieces and nephews in the future to keep me happy.
Anyway, I will let you know what the doctor says when I post on the board tomorrow.
Luv Bekki
Me 31, DH 34
TTC since our marriage in 2000 (!!?)
Tragic ectopic pregnancy in feb 2005 - left tube was removed
1st IVF October 2006 = BFN
Well today is 21st November - I have got this long awaited follow-up with the doctor to discuss the next steps that will be taken. Appointment is not until 17.40 - so I will not be able to let you know what gets said until tomorrow.
Vic - how is you doing and how is your hubbie - you said he was going to have an operation.
Jill - how are you feeling as you head into early pregnancy?
Jo - hope all is well with you too.
Bubble - not sure if you are still on the boards - but how are things going?
I have really gotten over the BFN now - it took around 12 days to fully recover - but now I am totally back to myself - smiling and happy as normal, which is something I never thought would happen. My husband has gotten over it quick too and he has provided more strength than I ever thought he would. I am also looking forward to being an Aunty in February - my sister is having a baby (of course it worked the first time round with her! ) - atleast if I can never have children I will have many nieces and nephews in the future to keep me happy.
Anyway, I will let you know what the doctor says when I post on the board tomorrow.
Luv Bekki
Me 31, DH 34
TTC since our marriage in 2000 (!!?)
Tragic ectopic pregnancy in feb 2005 - left tube was removed
1st IVF October 2006 = BFN
Hey folks,
Follow up appointment done. Apparently everything went ok - egg cells fertilized normally and the doctor was satisfied with how I responded to the medication etc... He said it may not have worked because I was very anxious and apprehensive (more than most women are ). That was actually very true. I told him about the pain I had during the transfer (which I think was the main reason for the failure ) and he said it should not have been that way, and that I should not have had pain. I felt more relaxed and not so scared, which helped and he seemed a little bit better in giving advice and what steps to take next. The laproscopy is planned for 22nd December after we return from our holiday to new zealand.
You may have seen my other post about trusting doctors - he seems creepy and there is something about him which makes me feel very uneasy but I cannot put a finger on what it is exactly. The first thing that made me uneasy was his coldness towards a very frightened patient (no words of comfort, jokes or smiles to help ), he seemed more interested in money than the welfare of the patient, then I noticed he never has a nurse in the room or any other assistant (not sure if that is normal or not ) this is regardless if alone or with husband, then out of the blue when he has never tried talking to get to know me commenting (yesterday) on my hair being darker than it was 6 weeks ago (?!) without a smile and not in a joking way.. while the comment was nothing wrong in itself, it just seemed very out of place given how he has always been with me, and really took me by surprise. Maybe I still have to get to know his ways and I still have time. If after the laproscopy and other future visits I feel really uncomfortable atleast we can think about changing before the next IVF.
All in all feeling heaps better though and looking forward to our holiday - we fly out to NZ on 28th November. The laproscopy will put my mind at rest about the condition of my uterus and remaining fallopian tube. So looking forward to both of these things.
Will speak soon,
Bekki
Me 31, DH 34
TTC since our marriage in september 2000
Feb 2005 - ectopic preghnancy and removal of left tube
October 2006 - 1st IVF = BFN
22nd December - laproscopy is planned to check right fallopian tube and condition of uterus etc..
Follow up appointment done. Apparently everything went ok - egg cells fertilized normally and the doctor was satisfied with how I responded to the medication etc... He said it may not have worked because I was very anxious and apprehensive (more than most women are ). That was actually very true. I told him about the pain I had during the transfer (which I think was the main reason for the failure ) and he said it should not have been that way, and that I should not have had pain. I felt more relaxed and not so scared, which helped and he seemed a little bit better in giving advice and what steps to take next. The laproscopy is planned for 22nd December after we return from our holiday to new zealand.
You may have seen my other post about trusting doctors - he seems creepy and there is something about him which makes me feel very uneasy but I cannot put a finger on what it is exactly. The first thing that made me uneasy was his coldness towards a very frightened patient (no words of comfort, jokes or smiles to help ), he seemed more interested in money than the welfare of the patient, then I noticed he never has a nurse in the room or any other assistant (not sure if that is normal or not ) this is regardless if alone or with husband, then out of the blue when he has never tried talking to get to know me commenting (yesterday) on my hair being darker than it was 6 weeks ago (?!) without a smile and not in a joking way.. while the comment was nothing wrong in itself, it just seemed very out of place given how he has always been with me, and really took me by surprise. Maybe I still have to get to know his ways and I still have time. If after the laproscopy and other future visits I feel really uncomfortable atleast we can think about changing before the next IVF.
All in all feeling heaps better though and looking forward to our holiday - we fly out to NZ on 28th November. The laproscopy will put my mind at rest about the condition of my uterus and remaining fallopian tube. So looking forward to both of these things.
Will speak soon,
Bekki
Me 31, DH 34
TTC since our marriage in september 2000
Feb 2005 - ectopic preghnancy and removal of left tube
October 2006 - 1st IVF = BFN
22nd December - laproscopy is planned to check right fallopian tube and condition of uterus etc..
All in my heart!!!!!!!
I have not posted here in couple of weeks and I have no idea why!!!!! Its weird .. I kinda lost interest in everything for few days after my BFN. Anywayz Iam back now …. Ready to rock n roll! Here is my story- Unlike most of the people , I did an IVF even before trying the basic Clomid treatment as I was told it had more chances of pregnancy .. duh didn’t happen!!!! So I thought , maybe I should act normal like everybody else is and start all over . So this month, I went on clomid 50 mg for 5 days – cd 3 to 7. The needles drew my blood left and right for many days and here Iam on my cd 19 with couple of follies that are 10 mm!!! And Iam not surprised. Now I can’t wait to take provera and get my periods and start the next clomid cycle with 100 mg , don’t wanna waste time at all!
Anybody who know that Iam ttc , ask me to relax! What do they know? I can’t relax when I know I have some issues with fertility. Its impossible. I tried many things like taking long bubble baths, spas , vacations etc, na uh! This “relaxing” thing justs keeps getting away from me. So I decided I will just get along with my stress and make it my friend. You know what , it worked! I feel very comfortable now.Its like having an ugly mole on your face but you manage to live with it and as times goes by you even forget you have a mole. Also one other thing everybody says is to stay positive and optimistic - that doesn’t work for me either. Every month I expect to get pregnant – all excited and happy after making love(trying not to think of making a baby) thinking (this time its gonna hit , and when I see a negative.. man the disappointment is huge and then I am like a body with no soul for many days and by the time Iam back to normal , it’s the time for the next preggo test!! Back to the miserable days… So this month with clomid , I set up my mind - that pregnancy won’t happen . Guess what? Today even before they did my U/S , I told the Nurse that my follies will be only be 10 mm and I would like to get my periods asap. I think she had a strange look on her face when I said that! I have acted like a real bold person when I got my BFN with IVF, but deep in my heart I was torn apart! I just did not want to let others down . But I read an article , which said that we should not suppress our feelings, if you feel it say it. If you think something that worked for others is not working for you , that means its not for you , so find an alternative. And I found my alternative- relaxing methods does not work for me, so accept the fact that pregnancy is not gonna happen. That way if I get pregnant it will be a total surprise for me as I always wished how it should happen!
Ladies sorry about this long essay, but I had to let it out. First I wrote this like a journal, then I thought I should post it here in case if there is anybody out there who might find anything in this useful!
Becky thanks for remembering me!!
Anybody who know that Iam ttc , ask me to relax! What do they know? I can’t relax when I know I have some issues with fertility. Its impossible. I tried many things like taking long bubble baths, spas , vacations etc, na uh! This “relaxing” thing justs keeps getting away from me. So I decided I will just get along with my stress and make it my friend. You know what , it worked! I feel very comfortable now.Its like having an ugly mole on your face but you manage to live with it and as times goes by you even forget you have a mole. Also one other thing everybody says is to stay positive and optimistic - that doesn’t work for me either. Every month I expect to get pregnant – all excited and happy after making love(trying not to think of making a baby) thinking (this time its gonna hit , and when I see a negative.. man the disappointment is huge and then I am like a body with no soul for many days and by the time Iam back to normal , it’s the time for the next preggo test!! Back to the miserable days… So this month with clomid , I set up my mind - that pregnancy won’t happen . Guess what? Today even before they did my U/S , I told the Nurse that my follies will be only be 10 mm and I would like to get my periods asap. I think she had a strange look on her face when I said that! I have acted like a real bold person when I got my BFN with IVF, but deep in my heart I was torn apart! I just did not want to let others down . But I read an article , which said that we should not suppress our feelings, if you feel it say it. If you think something that worked for others is not working for you , that means its not for you , so find an alternative. And I found my alternative- relaxing methods does not work for me, so accept the fact that pregnancy is not gonna happen. That way if I get pregnant it will be a total surprise for me as I always wished how it should happen!
Ladies sorry about this long essay, but I had to let it out. First I wrote this like a journal, then I thought I should post it here in case if there is anybody out there who might find anything in this useful!
Becky thanks for remembering me!!
Hey Bubble,
Nice to have heard from you again. I also lost all interest after my BFN for around 5 -7 days. It took me around 12 days to get over it. I am ready to rock n roll again too.
When people tell me to think positive and to relax whilst TTC or doing IVF it also does not help for me.
Infact you get more stressed trying to think posivie and trying to suppress the negative feelings! And when you try to be positive you do not feel like you are being yourself - you feel like pretending to be someone you aren´t - and therefore you cannot relax (if that makes any sense?!)... 
Anyway the main thing is that we find our own way to cope and you and me have proven that through this.. we are fighters and refuse to be defeated!
Take care, Bekki xx
Nice to have heard from you again. I also lost all interest after my BFN for around 5 -7 days. It took me around 12 days to get over it. I am ready to rock n roll again too.
When people tell me to think positive and to relax whilst TTC or doing IVF it also does not help for me.
Infact you get more stressed trying to think posivie and trying to suppress the negative feelings! And when you try to be positive you do not feel like you are being yourself - you feel like pretending to be someone you aren´t - and therefore you cannot relax (if that makes any sense?!)... Anyway the main thing is that we find our own way to cope and you and me have proven that through this.. we are fighters and refuse to be defeated!
Take care, Bekki xx
-
jstrandlund
- Regular
- Posts: 131
- Joined: Thu Sep 28, 2006 9:51 pm
- Location: Minnesota
Hey Bekki and Bubble, Boy it feels like forever since I have talked to the two of you. I am so happy to hear that you are healing and moving forward. I like you have had some healing of my own to do. Unfortunately I ended up having a miscarriage at 6w2d. This whole process has been very difficult but now about a week and a half later I am beginning to heal. I can now talk about it without completely breaking down and I am finding my smile again. We have decided to take some time off to let my body and my heart heal before we try agian. We are thinking maybe in the spring. I have to believe that someday we will be blessed with the little angel we are trying so hard for and thats what keeps me going. I feel so lucky to have a wonderful dh that is extremely supportive and loving. We are now just waiting to see if my body will resolve this pregnancy itself or if I will have to have a d&c. I hope all is going well for the both of you and I will keep you in my prayers.
Jill
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;11;19/st/20100109/dt/-1/k/9af7/preg.png[/img]
Me 29/DH 29
1st IVF=BFP M/C
2nd IVF=BFN
Femara
4/7/09 Start first cycle
5/4/09 BFP!!
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;11;19/st/20100109/dt/-1/k/9af7/preg.png[/img]
Me 29/DH 29
1st IVF=BFP M/C
2nd IVF=BFN
Femara
4/7/09 Start first cycle
5/4/09 BFP!!
Jill Bekki and Bubble
SO very sorry to hear about Jills loss. It's a loss for all of us as we look to others success for hope in succes for ourselves. I do know it will happen for all of us at some point, it just may take longer then we thought. I think of you often and enjoy the updates I get from all of you. Lets keep it up until we can send photos of all the babies we worked so hard for.
Vic
SO very sorry to hear about Jills loss. It's a loss for all of us as we look to others success for hope in succes for ourselves. I do know it will happen for all of us at some point, it just may take longer then we thought. I think of you often and enjoy the updates I get from all of you. Lets keep it up until we can send photos of all the babies we worked so hard for.
Vic
Jill, oh my god - tears are in my eyes right now as I write.
It is something similar to how I may have felt last February when I had the ectopic, as I really believed I was pregnant when I had no period for ages. I did not think about getting a pregnancy test because it sometimes happens that I get 7 weeks between my periods, maybe once a year, especially if I am stressed. Although I tried to push aside positve feelings about being pregnant because I know I always have bad luck, deep inside I kind of knew I was pregnant - then I had sudden sharp pains, was rushed to hospital and told I had to be operated on immediately otherwise I would die (tube had already ruptured ). The night of the operation me and my husband were not even considering going to the hospital, I said "it would seem silly going to the hospital just complaining of pains in stomach ". Then I decided to ring my mum who lives in England, for advice and she said we should go the hospital. So we did and luckily she saved my life. If they had not been reachable by phone that night, I may not even be here now.. I know this little story does not quite match yours and we all have different sad stories - but that was also one huge thing I had to get over, together with my BFN from IVF.
Jill my heart goes out to you - we have all survived and gotten over alot - and one day I am sure we will get what we want. We are all strong, time heals and we can move forward. There are people out there in happy relationships without our problems, who would not even know how to cope in a crisis .. we have proven we can.
Vic nice to hear from you too. Yes, I am all up for posting on this thread until we have what we want. I normally post atleast once a week with my updates - but folks tomorrow I fly out to New Zealand for 3 weeks with my husband to escape all the hassles of the last weeks - I need the break. I will post just before Christmas with all our news.
Thinking of you all - you mean heaps to me. This particular chatboard thread has been my strength throughout the whole IVF and will continue to be moving on and into the fute.
LUV Bekki xxxx
It is something similar to how I may have felt last February when I had the ectopic, as I really believed I was pregnant when I had no period for ages. I did not think about getting a pregnancy test because it sometimes happens that I get 7 weeks between my periods, maybe once a year, especially if I am stressed. Although I tried to push aside positve feelings about being pregnant because I know I always have bad luck, deep inside I kind of knew I was pregnant - then I had sudden sharp pains, was rushed to hospital and told I had to be operated on immediately otherwise I would die (tube had already ruptured ). The night of the operation me and my husband were not even considering going to the hospital, I said "it would seem silly going to the hospital just complaining of pains in stomach ". Then I decided to ring my mum who lives in England, for advice and she said we should go the hospital. So we did and luckily she saved my life. If they had not been reachable by phone that night, I may not even be here now.. I know this little story does not quite match yours and we all have different sad stories - but that was also one huge thing I had to get over, together with my BFN from IVF.
Jill my heart goes out to you - we have all survived and gotten over alot - and one day I am sure we will get what we want. We are all strong, time heals and we can move forward. There are people out there in happy relationships without our problems, who would not even know how to cope in a crisis .. we have proven we can.
Vic nice to hear from you too. Yes, I am all up for posting on this thread until we have what we want. I normally post atleast once a week with my updates - but folks tomorrow I fly out to New Zealand for 3 weeks with my husband to escape all the hassles of the last weeks - I need the break. I will post just before Christmas with all our news.
Thinking of you all - you mean heaps to me. This particular chatboard thread has been my strength throughout the whole IVF and will continue to be moving on and into the fute.
LUV Bekki xxxx