Pheonixes Rising

[Julie2039]

Hi girls

Boards seem quiet this week. Hope all ok....

LIS/NIKKI/SOURIS - Sending you loads of big hugs and hope you are all feeling ok xxx

LUCY - How are you? Hope you are fully better and feeling better about dad situ xx

MLG - How are you feeling??? 9 days to go so could be anytime! Hope you are well

JEN - Hope you are ok and have tackled your crimbo cards. Can't believe it is less than 3 weeks away!!!!

xxx

[Lis]

Hi girlies - I have missed you all and have decided I must spend more time on here talking to you all. I have popped ina few times over this last week since posting but didn't want to bring you all down with my negative mood

Jen - honey I am so glad to hear you have gone for egg donor. That's fantastic news. As dh and I have learned to accept and realise over this last year, being a parent isn't about DNA its about changing the nappies,dishing out the kissesd and cuddles and giving all your unconditional love and support. I am thrilled for you and think its absoulutely the best decision with everything you've been through. Just think 2007 is going to be the year for you - getting married, having your own precious bundle and Broc being the doting doggy that he is Gald you are enjoying some nights out. Take care xxx

Julie - wow! Its all go. Only one day to go til down regging. I am so excited for ya honey. And you are doing great with cutting out the drinking - you must be feeling so virtous I have not drank much in 6 months now. Didn't think I had it in me as I love my wine. So egg retreival should be sometime mid Jan right?? Keep us updated. We are with you all the way. xxx

Lucy honey I am so sorry you have been through the mill recently. How are things with you Dad, I was really sorry to hear that he isn't being supportive. As hard as it is you need to concentrate on being around people who are there for you at the mo. Appt in Jan for you?? Hey that's not long to go. You'll be cycling in no time. xxx

Nicki hun PC still not working?? Hope to hear from you on here soon. Hope you are ok xxx

Hi to preg phoenixws MLG and Gail xxx
MLG not long now!! You must be excited

Smita its so lovely that you still find time to come on here and support us all. This Christmas will be so special for you now that Dhruvva is here xxx

Well I've been doing some research. We have been looking at using ampules 9 and 10 of the donor sperm that we bought (we have 5 left) for DIVF if the next 3 cycles of DI failed. However because Luis Hughes in London (where the sperm was bought from) want to use all their donors again and again they will not allow embryos to be frozen from an IVF cycle (as that will count as a pregnancy and each donor is only allowed to contribute to 10 families / pregnancies). This is why they stipulated it was only to e used for IUI/DI. In theory then we could go ahead but it means we couldn't freeze any additional embies. Our clinic have discussed a blastocyst transfer with us too but when I phoned today said they were not keen for us to progress with this because 1) it is morally wrong not to be allowed to freeze additional embies - which I totally agree with - and 2) if i get OHSS (which the clinic say I have a higher risk of ) and the cycle is abandoned all my embies would be left to die .

As our clinic say they have not been able to buy in any donor sperm for IVF purposes for weeks now thwy are unable to offer us any treatment at all if our remaining DI cycles fail so we are looking at going to Dundee or Glasgow Nuffield for a consultation. Might as well get on the waiting list now and be ready to go ahead around MAy / June time.

It just feels as if someone is trying to put as many hurdles in our way as possible. I'm also totally bewildered as to why DI isn't working for us. And it doesn't help that the clinic said to me they thought I would have been one of the first women to get an early BFP from the tmt out of all the women undergoing DI there at the mo! Any advice from you phoenixes would be most appreciated

[Lis]

Julie we must have been posting at same time! Are you excited about tomorrow?? Meant to say on last post - I really felt for you when I read about your initial problems re oestrogen levels but glad all sorted itself out xxx

[Julie2039]

Hi LIS -

I am sorry to read your post - you are having such a hard time. I really hope things get better for you both and the obstacles are moved. The sh*t we get dealt will make us grow in to stronger people and we will get bigger and better rewards. Our good times will come and I really hope it is quick!!! Love n hugs to you both. Keep us informed. As for me I have been sooo excited but last night became petrified (I HATE NEEDLES!!!!!!!!)but the nurse showed me how to do it and then I did it - it is quite easy really. Obviously would prefer not to do it but it is not as bad as i thought. Will be a pro very soon i am sure. Anyone know how soon the headaches/moods kick in?? xxxxxxx

[Lis]

Hey Julie congrats on the first injection. You did it girl! xxx

I have made an appt to got to the Nuffield Glasgow on 19th December to see about going on the DIVF waiting list. I'll add it to the list when I get home. So glad to have made the decision to try Glasgow

[NickiMark]

hello girls!!!

I am typing this from dh's lap top as the house pc is out of action, got a virus frm hell, and then pc broke all together, anyway last sunday dh spend hours trying to fix it.... the pc is working now but it wont let us connect, spent an hr on phone to BT and still dint work, called again 2day and they said i need new software/modem so now we are waiting for that to be delivered....It's so annoying as right now n to ivf i have so many Q's......

My works do, was good!! I drove as taxi's to the venue were expensive!! and then on way home we stopped at our local pub whic open til 1am now, and had some drinks there!!

Anyway, i guess my story is much the same as Lis, the sperm frm Luis hughes is only for iui, and if we do use it for ivf, we cant freeze embies, so i guess in an ideal world i would like 2 embies, and no more then that way i wont have to destroy anyway, I really want to go ivf rather than iui, but all depends really. so the situation is right now we are waiting for our GP to refer us to NHS for ivf, but because our sperm has an expiry, we might have to self fund it so i am all mixed up really, and not making any final disission until after xmas.

I've had bloods done to check hormones and the are all in normal range, however, the fsh was at 7.1 and last time it was 5.5 but the 5.5 result was on day 3 and the 7.1 result was on day 12, so my Q is does the fsh rise in a cycle!!

Also does anyone know about ohss, who is at risk frm it??
Would i be at risk??

how many follicles is a good amount? how many eggs is a good amount??

When u have blastocyst transfer, the risk is that some embies dont get that far, just imagine no embies get that far, and then what, would you have nothing to transfer??
Blastocycst transfer sounds like a huge gamble to me, surely i'd be better off jsut doing day 2 transfer.

Another Q is do u haveto pay extra on top of ivf price for drugs, and if so can my Gp on nhs supply me with drugs!!

see what i mean i hav to many Q's to make a choice just yet. this is is huge thing, and i need to be sure it's right!!

Once i get our PC sorted i will email more Q's.... but i am finding it hard typing on this lap top!!!

huge hugs to julie, hope the down regging is going good, whn is EC and ET expected to be...

Love to jen, lisa, lucy, kate MLG,Souris and gail.......... x x x x

[Lis]

Nicki just quickly - some health boards will pay your drugs so worth askng.

Re Blastocyst - I was told yes a risk you get nothing if they don't make it but if they are monitoring the situation and its likely they won't make it they wil do day 2 (is thast right IVF phoenixes?)

Also you know what I was told re OHSS so won't repeat that

xxx

[Julie2039]

HI GIRLS

LIS - You sound more positive. Glad you have got the appt sorted. Hopefully everything will become clearer before crimbo and you can enjoy xmas knowing you have something to look forward to.

NIKKI - What a whirl you are in!! Glad you enjoyed night out x Hope you get your questions answered...doesn't get any easier...Every appt we go to I ask what I want and then come out with more questions than I went in with!!! I am having NHS funding so pay prescription charge for my drugs....Hope you get the answers xxx (hoping EC will be 6 jan...if not will be aroung 15th)

Hope you all enjoy your weekend xxxxx

[souris]

Hello girls!

just came back from Oman (an hour drive from Dubai) so we can extend our visa for 60 days. And I am knackerd! So just a quick post:

Nicki, sorry for your pc, I just hate when it happens! last week, out of 3 laptop we have at home, 2 got virus! My Dh work's one, but thank god it is sorted now, and Dh daughter's one because of her Ipod and we could not do nothing but format the whole thing! And just a minute ago, I spilled my glass of water on mine!!!! (but it is ok... )

I dont know if there a "good" number of eggs and follies...
For me I had
IVF 1: 13 follies 11 eggs
IVF 2: 7 follies 5 eggs
IVF 3: 35 follies 21 eggs (or something like that) and OHSS (I had double the stims)

OHSS, I think everyone can be at risk. For me, it was quite painful but not horrible. I did have to go to the hospital, were they scaned my whole tummy and back to see if the fluid was not getting into my lungs. I had fluid around my kidney, which was bad enough for them to keep me 3 days, until all the fluid was gone. I was told there is no risks for the embies, on the contrary, that it could help with implantation.

Sorry I dont jnow about your other questions

Hope you all ladies are well.

me, just waiting for xmas to be over... I had another milk leak today, which upset me, especially that I have finish my meds for the milk to dry up... so dont know what else to do.

Also, I suspect my sis is pregnant. We normally speak everyday on msn, but lately she has been weird, telling me that there are some changes in her life but that we need to speak directly... Maybe I am being paranoiac, but I think she doesnt want to hurt me... ANd I am scared, because I would be very happy for her but it would be so hard for me.,.

Ah well, maybe I am completely wrong, so we will see

Take care
love
souris

[luby]

Hi everyone

Hope everyone is well... This will have to be a quick message as my mum is here for a long weekend... didn't want you all to think I've been neglecting you, haven't been posting much recently..!

Anyway I have some news......... I won't be going ahead with my next cycle in Feb as planned, I have decided to take some time out and do my next cycle in June/July. I feel I need to take a good few months off IVF, I have done 4 cycles in a year and it gets harder and harder, I just don't feel very strong at the min and if I did it again now and it was bad news I don't think I'd deal with it very well, the last 2 years have been very hard for me, with IVF, my boyfriend being poorly and just general shitty life stuff... so I'll still be sticking around if that’s OK? Would like to support my fellow phoenixes.. But won't be cycling as planned.! It was a very hard decision to make but I think it’s the right one.!

Lisa - I'm am sorry you are having this hard time and feel like obstacles are put in your path, yes, we ask ourselves everyday, why didn't it work? For you, why didn't DI work? There just isn't any answers, it would make life a lot easier for us if they were answers wouldn't it. You will get there, you should be very proud of yourself with what you've been through, infact we should all be very proud, this is a very hard journey we are all on, we will get our dream one day.!


Julie - Well done on the 1st injection, they do get easier, I promise.. for me the headaches came about 2/3 days into injections.. some people don't get any side effects, let’s hope you're one of the lucky ones..! I bet you're soooo excited aren't you hun?

Nicki - Your FSH sounds OK to me, they should test between day 2 and day 5, anything above day 5 they say is a false reading, 5.5 is good and 7.7 isn't that high really.
OHSS - People are more at risk if they produce a lot of eggs when been on the stims, like a girl I know had 25 eggs after stims and got OHSS. I think the more eggs the more at risk, but could be wrong..
As to how many follies and eggs is a good amount, well we'd all like to get as many as possible, but after all it only takes ONE...
Blastocast transfer isn't something I know much about but I see what you say, I've always had 2 day transfer..
Yes you have to pay for drugs on top of IVF, you could always ask your GP id they'll fund the drugs but I know mine wouldn't and a lot don't, it seems it’s based on postcode area, which isn't far at all but I would try for nothing..
Sorry haven't helped much with Q's but if you're worried about anything and need Q's answered speak with your fertility nurse, I'm sure they'll be happy to help. It is a hard when we have so many Q's isn't it..?

Souris - How you feeling sweetie? Obviously still hurting like mad but how you're feeling a bit better.? Thinking of you.! As for you sis, if she is preg it will be hard, my sis is preg at min, I am sooo happy for her, she is my best friend, but you know it does hurt, she will know how much your hurting, hence why so wants to speak with you direct, it will be hard for her too to tell you as she won't want to hurt you. Take Care sweetie.

Jen - How’s you? What you up to this weekend? How's Broc doing? Bet he is getting big now isn't he?

Gail/ MLG - Hope you're both OK?

Kate - Hi to you, hope you're OK

Hi to any one else I've missed.

While I've been typing this I have been thinking if I've made the right decision again, I want this so much and to think I'm putting it off another 6 months, I think I could be 4/5 months preg by then.... oooorrrr I wish this was easy.. my dp thinks we should wait.. what do you think?

Right going to have a nice glass of wine with my mum and step dad now.

Speak to you soon.

Love to you all and have a nice weekend.

Lucy

[Lis]

PREGNANT PHEONIXES

MLG 39 weeks Little girl due ????
MLG - Whats your due date??? xxx

Gail 26 wks...a little girl due xxx

Julie- started down regging on Thurs 6th dec
Good luck Honey

13th Dec --Julie -- Madness Concert
15th Dec -- Julie -- WORK Christmas Party
18th Dec -- Lisa IVF appt new Hospital
20-21st Dec -- Lisa Stobo Castle for wine and pampering with a best friend!
23rd Dec -- Lisa candlelight carol concert with her mum!
25th Dec-- Everyone-- XMAS!!!

6th Jan '07 -- Lisa starst bloods for 6th DI tmt
8th Jan '07 -- ?1st insem 6th DI
9th Jan '07 -- ?2nd insem 6th DI

[Julie2039]

Hi girls

Just wondered why I feel so low......only had 2 Buserelin injections so can't be that. I feel totally flat, not excited...for the past couple of weeks every time I thought about starting treatment my heart flipped (if you know what I mean) because I was so excited and now...nothing! Not sure if it is self preservation or pure fear!! My 2nd injection was awful. Ended up in a right tiz woz because I couldn't get the syringe full - once it was full it kept sliding back up . Was on my own as DH working but managed it in the end.

My question is are my feelings normal?! Everything I read and people I speak to say I should be excited and I just feel miserable and tired....

[Lis]

Morning phoenixes!

I have updated list and added a few dates of things I am up to in December since I haven't added anything for ages.

I have started putting 2007 dates in if anyone has anything to add?

I am going to Stobo Castle in 11 days time and can't wait! Stobo is a luxury health retreat with amazing gardens, fantastic pool and spa treatments and beautiful rooms with a drawing room that has a log fire - I have never been but heard so much about it. ! I am sooo excited My friend is taking me for my Christmas - we are spending the whole day there, having dinner, staying overnight and then having breakfast and lunch the next day before leaving. She decided I needed cheering up and also she told me I am a "fantastic friend" as have supported her through a recent traumatic break up with her partner and this is her way of saying thankyou. To say I am gobsmacked at this pressie is an understatement as Stobo is renowned in Scotland for being fantastic (and not to mention a tad pricey) Sorry for going on but I am just sooooo excited - its the first time I've felt excited in ages about something. We are going to have a luxury manicure and mud & mineral treatment whilst there and plenty of vino with dinner! And then I am on hols from work til the 8th of Jan!!

Lucy - I think you are wise to think about delaying treatment but maybe after Christmas, after a relaxing break you will be better able to judge how you feel about it all. I am having a month off DI this month as I felt I really needed it but even at the last minute I started thinking maybe I should just have carried on but I'm sure by January I will have been glad to have had the break.

Souris, glad to hear you are sounding brighter. Take care and hope you are being kind to yourself.

Julie - any headaches yet?? How are those injections going?

Well I'm off to do some Christmas wrapping and writing cards

Love to all xxxxxxxx

[Lis]

Julie honey! Are you sure it can't be the meds ?? Why not post a msg on general forum and get some support from those who have been through it? I think it would also be totally natural to feel like this - after all you are bound to be feeling apprehensive as you have waited so long to get here. You have wanted this so much for so long - maybe its just your body's way of finally being able to relax as you are finally here. Try and have a nice easy day doing nice things. I am sorry I can't answer any of youe questions but I would think this is natural and not to dwell on it. I am sure it will pass.

Thinking of you doll xxxx

[souris]

Hello phoenixes

Lucy, If you feel at peace with your decision it guess it means that your body needs a break and also your mind! But as Lis said, you might feel refreshed after xmas break and ready to start again! In any case, dont push yourself!

Julie, I felt exactly the same way on my last cycle. I had been waiting for it a very long time and could not wait to start. And once I did, I felt tired of it, not excited anymore etc.... Thinking about it now, I think I was trying to be detached from the whole thing as much as possible, so if I got a BFN it would not be too hard (and was kidding myself). It was a kind of self preservation...
Just try to be patient, you dont really need to be excited and I am sure that it is much better if you have other things to do and to think about. It is not good to be obsessed by the treatment (although the every day injections doesnt make it easy to forget about it)
I am sorry to hear you had trouble with the injection... I always lock myself in a quiet room to do it, so I am in no rush if I cant get all the meds in the first go. Take carexxx

Lis, this place sounds like heaven! What a nice gift from you friend!! Enjoy every second of it, get pampered, relax, indulge! 11 days ohhhh sounds like a long time to wait!!
I am sure the wait is worth it though!

Nothing new for me, no news from sis... week end is finish...
Have a nice Sunday all
xxx
souris