To those of you who M/C on previous cycles and then re-tried

[Sita]

Hi Girls,

I have just found out that I have M/C at 7 weeks and I am trying to find the strength to carry on with life and then have another go.

I know that some of you have been through this experience.

I would love to hear how you coped with the grief and then how long was it before you tried again ?

Did any of you go through a FET cycle just after a M/C and was this advised ? Did you take any precautions the next time around ?

I would really appreciate your advise.

Love,
Sita

[vicky77]

Sita, I am so sorry to hear that you lost your baby.....I was hoping maybe you would have some miracle given that I couldn't have one......
I am joining you in this thread since I am in your exact same position and will also like to hear from those who went through m/c's and then were able to become pregnant......
Sending you lots of hugs.......

[suzhan]

I was never lucky enough to have any frosties to use from prior cycles, but I did have a m/c from my first cycle and kept trying. I'm not out of the woods now, by any stretch, but have gotten a bfp in my 3rd cycle. I had a d&c and it took 7 weeks after to get my first AF, then we waited another couple of cycles before we tried again, mostly because my RE wanted us to. If I had it my way, I would have tried again much sooner due to my age.

In terms of how to deal with a m/c I think there's no real answer - I personally took a week off of work and didn't even leave the house for 3-4 days - just cried constantly with DH. Above all, it's not your fault. Even in natural pregnancy, chromosomal problems are really not that uncommon and some say almost 20-30 pregnancies end in m/c in the first trimester. I know it's probably impossible right now, but keep trying to remember that you did get pregnant - and for us that's 95% of the issue. It's a huge accomplishment that you were able to get to that bfp and it means there's a tremendous chance that you can do it again.

Sita - I don't know why FET impacts the ability to do chromosome testing. Many don't do the test until the 2nd or even 3rd m/c since such a high number are chromosome problems because it is quite expensive from what I understand. I wish I knew more but I'm afraid I don't.

I'm so sorry you've had to go through this, I wish this was something that no one who has to go through IVF to get preganant had to face because it really is just so unfair. You're in my prayers.

- suzhan

[LauraLou]

My first IVF/ICSI cycle I got a BFP and then miscarried. I was devasted and it took me several months to feel like myself again.

I wanted to try again the next month, but my RE had us wait 3 cycles before he let us try again. My understanding is that waiting 3 cycles after a m/c is pretty common. They want your body to return to a normal state before starting again.

We blessed to have a BFP with twins on our second try and this time everything looks great. I hope you will be able to try again this spring and that you will have a happy ending this time.

Please know my thoughts are with you in this difficult time.

Laura

[LauraLou]

Double post

[souris]

Sita, I am really sorry to read your news...

I m/c last month, at 12 weeks. I just had my Af (Very very light) just 30 days after the D&C. I want start as soon as possible, because I feel the time pressure. My doc said I could cycle 2 months after D&C.
She also want me to be in perfect moral condition, which I understand, but even if time will ease the pain, the loss will always be painful. I found it hard to grieve, it does get easier day by day. Everyone is different though!

I dont know about FET, because I did not have any embies to freeze.

You will find the strengh to carry on, but give you all the time you need

lots of love
xxx
souris

[JayfromQld]

I am so sorry for your loss.

I miscarried a baby at 8 weeks after a fet.

I was so devistated i had to find myself again so I took a year off. It was so hard dealing with the due date and knowing I wasnt even trying. After my year off I did another fresh cycle and became pregnant with twins which are now 9 months old.

best wishes
Jay

[Sita]

Thank you so much Suzhan, Souris, Jay and Laura,

I hope all of you are doing great.

I really appreciate your response and your encouraging life experiences. After reading your posts I am convinced that I need to try and recouperate and start all over again. I will give myself some time and then think about my options.

My DH and I and my mum are going away for a few days so that we can have a small break.

Vicky, I hope you are also planning to have a break. I am sure it will do us good to have a change of scenary. Take care my dear !

I hope all of you have a wonderful New Year !

Lots of love,
Sita

[DeniseM]

I just wanted to say I'm sorry you're going through this. My first assisted cycle I lost the baby at 9 weeks. My clinic had me wait approx 3 months then tried again. Trust me, its as much for your heart as it is for your body.

My twins were conceived with my fourth cycle, so there is hope.

Prayers for all of you sufferring a loss.