Newbie X-smoker ...ASHAMED! Need avice PLZ

[CMSAllen]

Hi Ladies!!! This is my very first posting on this forum. I do have another group that I have belonged to for the past year .... but I am much too embarrassed to post the following on that particular board...if for no other reason, because I'll feel embarrassingly "judged".
I am 35 yrs old (will be 36 in May) and I am one of the really lucky ones who have already been blessed with 4 children. I underwent a tubal ligation in 1997, divorced shortly thereafter, then remarried in '05. I had a tubal reversal, and got my BFP (BD'ing w/ clomid) last March. Unfortunately, the pregnancy ended in a ruptured ectopic. From that point on, it was very difficult to get my 'good side' to produce follies, while my tubeless side was abundant. ...We did succeed, however, and got a BFP via injectables and IUI last November (in utero----YEAH!!!!) ... but ended in a m/c due to a "Blighted Ovum" (ANembryonic sac) ...Basically ... I got pregnant and delivered a 3 month old placenta. Every TTC'ers dram...right? (UGGGH) ...Anyway, because of my age, and the whole "egg quality questionable" thing .... we are now in the beginning stages of our first IVF cycle.
THIS IS WHERE I BURY MY FACE
I have been a smoker for the past 6 years. I JUST quit 6 days ago (on day 7 of the bc pills). ..I start stimming next week, and I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Scared that I have really screwed all chances of a successful IVF due to the fact that i had not quit 3 months prior to starting IVF, and these eggs have already been affected.
Are there any success stories out there at all concerning "Brand New Ex Smokers"?? I am so scared.
...My antral count was 11 ...... My FSH came back at 7.3 (that scares me too ....... 7.3 is awfully close to '10' "
Girls ... thank you so much for taking the time to reply.
Sincerely,
Courtney
Charlotte, NC

[AuntyPebbles]

Hi there, you really have been through it havent you, you have found a great place to get the support you will need, well done on quitting smoking please try not to beat yourself up over it youve taken a great step, i have to say my entire family smoke all my sisters aunty's and husbands and i have a huge family all healthy kids so no i dont think smoking will have effected your outcome.

wishing you a big healthy baby belly

hugs Aunty

[beauty19]

The important thing is that you stopped. Do not worry about what happened before. Focus on the things you can control. I am very proud that you quit. Keep it up.

Wishing you success and a BFP!!!!

Deb

[brekkemdb]

Courtney--first welcome to the board. Your history sounds much like mine. I too had a Tubal ligation 9 years ago after my sons birth. Then had a reversal in 2001--to later find out that my tubes had closed back up. We did 3 rounds of clomid and 3 rounds of IUI before attempting IVF> I too was a smoker. I am horrible person adn don't admit it often but i actually smoked during my ivf cycle--lupron, stims and all. I did quit the day we found out i was pg however. Don't dwell on the fact that you did smoke--rejoice in the fact in that you are not smoking now. Personally my smoking didn't hinder my cycle but i know it could of--we got lucky and got pg on our first round. Please email me privately if you would like to talk. mattgirl@charther.net
bridget

[katrina1]

Courtney,

Hey - stop feeling so bad! I too was a smoker and gave up when I began my second cycle. I went through the awful shame and guilt too. My first cycle when I was smoking produced 16 eggs and 11 grade one embryos!!! Only another smoker can understand how hard it can be so well done for giving up, there is no doubt this will give you a good chance but please don't think you have messed it up.

Katrina*

[sokru8]

Hey Courtney

Dont worry about people judging you. I myself quit smoking during my last ivf cycle. When I got my bfn the first thing I did was get cigarettes. You will be fine. Dont worry to much. My close friend smoked until the day she had the ET and has a sweet baby boy. I have cheated and smoked too and I always feel bad about it but that is life. I start bcps tomorrow so I am going to try not to cheat anymore.
PM me if you need a quit smoking buddy!
XOXO
Sonya

[cheekskuss]

they are right dont stress yourself about the past like me i am a smoker and i am trying very hard to stop i only smoke the most now 3 cigrettes a day i would go with out it for a day or 2 days but if i get stressed i go for one i talk to re and she told me she knows it hard but at least try to cut down but u know what there are women who smoke threw a whole pregenacy and everything is fine so dont beat yourself up about it

alot of baby dust to all

[CMSAllen]

Gosh ... I can't thank you girls enough for your words of encouragement. People that don't/haven't smoked just don't seem to quite understand just how hard it really is!!!

Do any of you know if there is any kind of nicotine reoplacement therapy that is considered adequate while undergoing IVF?
Thanks
Courtney