6mm Nuchal Translucency- Recommending termination of baby

[Stayinghopeful]

Hi everyone= I am in need of some serious advice. Today we went for our Nuchal test and I am 12wk 6days pregnant. The fold on the back of the neck was measured at 6mm. Which is twice the "normal" size.

The Dr. basically said the baby has Down Syndrome or possibly Turner Syndrome and a severe heart defect. She recommended termination for Tuesday.

We are absolutely devastated but I wanted to make sure before we go through the procedure that this hasn't happened to someone else and they had a healthy child in the end.

If you have any experience with this, please let me know. I'll take any advice I can get at this point. Even if you've had the same issue and you terminated the pregnancy, I would still love to hear from you so I know I'm making the right decision.

Hugs

[PebblesUK]

Hello,

I couldn't just read your message and not post. I'm so sorry you're having to go through this.

I'm quite surprised you haven't been offered an amnio to confirm this as the nuchal scan, although quite accurate is only around 85% whereas the amniocentesis is 99.9%

I would hate to give you false hope but one of my friends was told the same. She ignored them and has a very healthy little 3 year old.

It is obviously only your decision (and obviously DH). If I was put in the same position I think I would have the amnio for a second opinion.

Good luck to you whatever you decide to do. My thoughts are with you.

Hugs

Jo
xx

[Stayinghopeful]

Jo- thank you. Do you know what the measurement was for your friend?? I know that if it's slightly elevated there can still be the risk, but the low chance as well of Down's.

They said I could have it done, but most likely just putting myself through the waiting game with the same result in the end.

I'm thinking I may do the amnio this week and get the preliminary results back within a few days.

It's just devastating.

Thank you

[kholtan]

My heart totally goest out to you and DH. I am so sorry you are dealing with this painful result. Im the mean time I will be praying and hoping that your amnio shows a healthy baby. Take care and try and relax. We do our test on Tuesday and it just breaks my heart to hear this is happening when we are only a few days apart and I know how much you love this baby.

Good luck and we will all be praying for you and keeping our fingers crossed!
Kimberly

[FionaA]

I'm so sorry to hear of your troubles', it's a nightmare for you. I agree with Jo in that an amnio may put your mind at rest and sort out any doubts that you may have about the accuracy of the nuchal screen. I hope that whatever you decide you can find the strength to cope. Thinking of you. Fee

[hhb]

I am so sorry to hear of your situation. Although our baby didn't have Downs', we found out at 17 1/2 weeks that she has several other severe abnormalities. Individually they wouldn't have been life threatening, but the combination of all of them brought the doctors and geneticists to believe that she probably had severe mental retardation, if I even carried to full term. We terminated at 19 weeks after having an amnio. The amnio can be scary but can bring so much information. I think around 13 weeks is the earliest they can do one but I highly recommend you do.

Whatever happens or whatever you guys decide, I feel for you. If you terminate, please feel free to contact me off-line if you have any questions or just for support. I took it very hard and it affected me in so many different ways, but I never thought that we made the wrong decision. We had a three year old at the time and thinking of what having that baby, or losing it at birth, would do to him was in our thoughts during the decision process as well.

I have just a prayer for you before submitting this response. God be with you.

-Heidi
PS - I am 7 weeks pregnant and after seeing only one heartbeat last week, they saw two on Friday, and both are measuring a little different. My baby's abnormalities were found to be a fluke and not genetic, but I'm still very nervous with this pregnancy. We will have a level 2 ultrasound around 11 weeks with a geneticist and it can't come soon enough!

[Macca8]

OMG... I am totally gutted for you and heartbroken that you have to go through this. I really hope it is wrong and that the amnio brings better news.

I am having my Nuchal on Tuesday and pretty worried about it.

Lisa XXX

[Fed7281]

Hi,

I am so sorry for what you are going through. I hope that the amnio shows that everything is OK and you have a strong lil one. I will be praying hard for you. Keep us posted and if you need anything please let us know. My heart goes out to you and your family!


Erin

[Stayinghopeful]

Hi you guys- thank you again . We went in for another check up yesterday and peewee was still hanging in there. What has happened is he has developed what is called Cystic Hygroma. The result is 100% fatal, with this usually happening before birth. Only 5 cases of them alive in the world. We decided to put peewee out of his misery and terminated the pregnancy today.

I ask God why this happened to us? Why with only a .2% chance, how this could have happened to us? I have come to the conclusion that this baby needed someone to love him for 13 weeks which is what I have done everyday! I was blessed with him because somewhere, somehow he needed love.

I wouldn't trade this experience for the world. Would I trade the outcome? Yes, in a heartbeat. But I realize now that he has been a gift. I am grateful that he came into my life even if only for a moment. Even if I never saw him, or never held him. My belly held his belly and my heart linked to his heart. I know he felt my love.

I am hoping and praying that we will receive a child someday whom I can love even more because of this experience. I heard a child cry yesterday and the mom was so annoyed.......How I wish to hear that sound of my own baby.

We were so fortunate to get pregnant with only a 15% chance! I hope that miracle can happen for us again in the future.

I hope others can learn from this experience. It is so absolutely horrible to go through. But I learned that I'm glad I didn't rush the process, I'm glad that I had 4 days to still feel the baby inside me and to truly and honestly say goodbye, no matter how painful that was (at first I didn't want this at all, I just wanted it ALL TO BE OVER). Today, after the procedure, I feel I did everything I needed to do for our little one. I have no regrets. Our little one is in a better place and will no longer suffer! I now can say, I have an 'angel in heaven!' I feel blessed!

Best of luck to all you and thank you so much for all of your prayers and comments.

Hugs

[kholtan]

Stayinghopeful~
Your post just makes me cry! I am so, so, so sorry for you and your dh's loss. I just cannot imagine how you are both feeling right now. From reading your post I feel that you are one of the strongest women I have ever had the privledge of being in contact with. Your strength is so admired and I am certain you have an amazing angel on your side.

May your hearts heal in Godspeed! You will all be in my heart and prayers. Thank you so much for sharing your experience with us. So many will read this and feel a bond with you in the future and I hope the things you wrote will also help yourself and others grieve.

I so very much admire you and will be hangin on till I see you post that you are PG again. It will happen! Stay hopeful!

HUGS!!!! Take care of each other!
Love, Kimberly

[LauraLou]

I am so terribly sorry for your loss. Please give yourself all the time you need to grieve. Sometimes with an early loss, people think you should "get over it" quickly. They don't realize that no matter how far along you are, it is still the loss of a baby you loved with all your heart.

Please know that you and your DH are in my prayers.

[Stayinghopeful]

Thank you, you guys. Kimberly- I was 3 days before you . I will cherish that time and send your baby good blessings!

LauraLou- From your post I am sorry to notice your miscarriage after your first IVF too. I am so grateful and happy for you that you had the success of twins 4 months later. That is encouraging for me-- thank you! We are hoping to start again this summer.

I've been doing really well today, but I'm feeling really sad before I go to sleep tonight. I guess the best thing is to just cry and let it all out! I'm sure the loss of hormones so rapidly isn't really going to help this grieving process too much.

Hugs to all of you.

Thank you again! You gals are awesome!

[Smita]

Staying hopeful,
You sound like such a strong woman- I hope God gives you the strength to deal with your loss. Your post really really moved me.
Many hugs and prayers for a babe in your arms very soon.

smita

[LauraLou]

Stayinghopeful,

Yes, I m/c'd after my first round of IVF. I was devasted. I really wanted to try again right away, the next month. My RE wouldn't let me. He said we had to wait at least 3 cycles. Not only was it better physically to wait, it also gave me time to deal with my feelings of loss and anger.

As much as I didn't want to hear it at the time, my RE said the fact that I got pregnant the first time, even though I lost it, was a good sign that it would work again. Sure enough, he was right. I am hopeful that you too will be successful again the second time and you will holding your baby in your arms sometime next year.

I still think about the first baby I lost. Even thought I am thrilled to be pregnant with the boys, I still wonder what that baby would have been like. For some reason, I think she was a girl.

Please know my thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Macca8]

Stayinghopeful,

I could honestly feel my heart break as I read your words. I can never in a million years imagine your pain but yet I feel its reality now as I type this. I have had several miscarriages myself but never to the point a baby was there moving within me. I always thanked god for that but now I understand the opposite, that you have bonded with your angel and blessed his journey to the afterlife where he will rest and watch over mummy & daddy now.

I am so so very sorry, words will never convey just how much. I truly wish you the best and hope you will hold your own precious baby one day soon.

Love Lisa XXX