May/June Cycle Buddies

Discussion group for all topics related to infertility including preparation for pregnancy, causes, investigation and treatment of infertility.
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mommytobe
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Posts: 71
Joined: Fri Apr 13, 2007 5:14 am
Location: NYC

Post by mommytobe »

Hi ladies,


Well i guess i had one day of being on cloud nine. This morning i went to pee (tmi) and I saw blood, not spotting, blood. I called the dr office and they want me to come in tomorrow for another blood test. I am soo sad and scared, DH was here with me when it all happened, he was soo sweet about it all.

I know this is possible and sitll be PG, but I can't help but worry. so pray me.

Susan sweetie, you are NOT a failure, I will pray that things turn around for the best. I hope your numbers proves positive and promising.

Julie, my love, why do you think it did not work? I pray for you that it does. I totally agree IVF is not the easiest thing to go through.

Hugs
Tia
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Jul1e
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Location: UK

Post by Jul1e »

Susan, I am so sorry, I really am. You deserve so much more. Please look after yourself. It shouldn't be this hard.

Tia, hope you've got nothing to worry about, like everyone's been telling me blood does not necessarily need to be a bad sign. You've had your BFP and a really high count. I hope so much that it stays that way for you.

Well this board certainly isn't full of joys today. I'm still spotting, a little heavier than yesterday but still dark not red blood. I have AF like cramps and feel like she's coming so am not holding much hope. I didn't test this morning, I guess I wanted one more day with a little bit of hope and didn't feel strong enough to see a negative.

I'll test in the morning when I'm getting my sample to drop off at the clinic. I'd rather do my own test than get told by a nurse.

I asked DH last night if we could start to look into adoption and he agreed. I still want to do IVF a few more times but can't bear the thought of not being a mum at all and know that the adoption process can take years. So I went online and read a little about adoption in the UK, all the screening you go through, etc and the tears were just flooding down my face. What people like us have to go through is just so unfair. I'm not actually sure if I can start the adoption process if we're still ivf-ing but I'll look into it anyway, at least then I'll feel like I'm doing something.

Tia and Susan, my thoughts are with you both, please look after yourselves.

Hey Soph, how you holding up?

Hi to everyone else, hope you're all having a better day.

Julie x
me 33, dh 41
ttc 3 years
1st ivf feb 07 -BFN
2nd ivf june 07 - BFN
3rd ivf nov 07 - BFP! :)
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ltaylor
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Posts: 80
Joined: Wed Apr 11, 2007 6:05 pm
Location: St. Louis, MO

Post by ltaylor »

Susan-Words can’t express how sorry I am to hear what happened. I had my m/c in March and it was one of the hardest things I have ever gone through in my life. I wish I could reach through this screen and give you a super big hug. Please know that it’s not your fault.

Tia-I hope this is just a blip in the road to your beautiful, healthy baby being born. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Julie-Try and stay strong! I know it’s easy for me to say but I hope you get your BFP you deserve.

Literatriz-Thank you for the well wishes for tomorrow. I hope everything goes as planned for you and your DH. Good luck!

As for me, I’m getting nervous about my transfer tomorrow. The clinic was supposed to call me yesterday to tell me what time to be there and no one ever called. I called this morning and told them (maybe in a bitchy way) that no one ever called me. Oh well, they are probably used to it. Hopefully they call back soon because I have to call my acupuncture guy to tell him what time I need to come in before the transfer.

Last night as I lay in bed, I was thinking about this whole process and decided it felt like playing in a sports game and sitting on the bench. All the sudden the coach says, it is your time to go in and don’t disappoint me. Anyway, I just have to keep my chin up and hope for the best.

Hello to everyone I missed!

L
Me 34, DH 34
Nov 06 IVF-BFN, March 07 IVF-BFP but miscarried at 5 weeks, 2 days, June 07 FET-BFN, Oct 07 IVF-BFN
May 08 IVF-BFP but miscarried again
My2LnT
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Location: Lorton, VA

Post by My2LnT »

OH Susan I am so sorry. I'm sending you hugs and lots of prayers.You are not a failure you would not want anyone to call you that so please don't be so hard on yourself.(((HUGS))))

ltaylor - Best wishes to you for your transfer tomorrow. Hope all goes well.

Tia - Plenty of women have bleeding. Don't be sad there is nothing confirmed yet and it could very well still be perfectly normal even tho it don't seem that way right now. Praying for you that all is OK.

Literatriz - I hope you get lots of nice mature eggs and get one step closer to your dream.
Stephanie
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PMApsy
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Location: Montreal

Post by PMApsy »

Hello ladies,

mommytobe: I'm so sorry that you had a scare this morning! But, silly as it sounds, don't worry... your beta was really strong, so there's a high chance that the bleeding is not dangerous. I understand your stress and sadness, it's really a sick joke your body's playing on you. *hugs* Glad to hear that DH comforted you, though. :)

TansRN: thanks for your kind words sweetie... more about that later at the end of my post.

My2LnT: awww what a beautiful way to phrase it! And indeed, I think it's the way you should understand it that way.. if you didn't get twins, it's simply because it was not supposed to happen. ;)

jovigal: LOL me, a timebomb? :lol: Ah, well, you're right... and the bomb exploded this morning. Thanks for keeping hope, but...

literatriz: have a good trip my darling, this sounds VERY promising! :D And you'll have a nice, almost drug-free comfy body to offer your little embies! :) Remember to tell your husband to ejaculate one last time 3 days before fertilization (before they aspire the eggs out) so his soldiers are strong and numerous for the big day! ;) And thanks for your kind words. Not sure I'll let my children know what pain I went through to have them if I do have kids. I don't want them to feel guilty or like they have to meet up with high expectations because I had trouble becoming pregnant and find them doubly precious. Sending lots of baby dust your way!

gbnut: oh, my sweet darling, oh no! I feel absolutely gutted for you, Susan! That is SO unfair! Going through the joys of feeling life inside you and have it confirmed by a BFP... and then have that taken away from you, it's just so cruel, so cruel! Please hunny, don't feel like a failure. There's NO WAY you did ANYTHING that could have caused that miscarriage. Don't even try to over-analyse your every breath since your BFP, it has nothing to do with what's happening. I, too, feel like a broken machine because I'm not able to become pregnant, but it's not true. We can do things that other people can't do, being healthy and high functioning does not depend on one's capacity to become and stay pregnant. Please don't base your self-value on this even if it's terribly tempting right now. You're a beautiful woman sweetie, and you're more than your uterus. I really wish I could sit next to you and stroke your back. Keep us posted whenever you want, but I'll be thinking of you real hard today. *hugs*

Jul1e: I really hope things turn out for the best. Dark spotting is still not a sign that everything is over, even if it lasts for weeks! I'm so sorry to read that you're crying and probably facing that BFN already, but it's still not confirmed. Try to keep yourself busy with something nice and time will pass faster. *hugs* I know this is a difficult time and I'm with you.

ltaylor: good luck for your ET tomorrow! :) Can't wait to update the list and put you in the 2ww! :D I hope your clinic calls soon! Sheeew!

Well, as for me, I'm afraid I'll add a little bit of melancholy to this thread today. This morning was hard. I went to the clinic and I really didn't want to be there. I was sitting there with my box of syringes feeling miserable... the nurse came to us and took us in an empty office. She said she had no idea I would come this morning. I was furious. I had hoped they would have checked their darn messages and spoken to each other, but no. So I was able to keep my composure this time and I told her in a very tense tone that there had been a mistake and my apt had always been planned for this morning and so on. She told me to wait there while she was going to get my file. Took ages because it had not been classified yet (they took it out yesterday of course).

When she came back, she pointed out that I looked angry (DUH!) and asked me if it was because they had made a mistake that I was angry like that (the poor thing, though, she looked a bit intimidated... she was very soft). Aaaand that's when I lost it. I totally DREADED to just pronounce the words again because I knew just saying "my menses started two days ago" and so on would make me break down and cry. My DH came to the rescue and said, "It's because we know that the result will be negative..." "Oh, and you wouldn't have come if we hadn't called you yesterday?" "Of course we'd have come, my appointment had always been planned for this morning," I replied, starting to cry. "If I had known I could come yesterday, I would have appreciated it because my menses started two days ago and pushing progesterone inside and seeing my fingers covered with blood is devastating, and it would have been nice to stop all that yesterday!" Let's say she didn't argue... that time, she understood. She told me to stay there while she took what she needed and brought it there. I cried hard again, hating myself for breaking down like that. At least I stopped when she came back and took my blood. I could barely look at her. We agreed that she would call me for the results (we sure didn't want to stay there waiting for them) and I practically left the clinic running for the door. I finished crying in my DH's arms in the staircase. *sigh* it's already humiliating to have a BFN (again), crying in front of them is humilating for me, too, even if they probably see that every week or so! I prefer to keep a cool head and a stiff lip! ;) (but then, 1/8 of my blood is English, so.. :lol:)

Of course, the result is negative. I'm supposed to meet my Dr for the follow-up apt, but we're in no rush. I was too distraught to schedule that apt this morning, so I'll call them later. It will take as long as it takes. My poor DH was such a sweetheart... he offered me to drive me home but I wanted to go to work. And I don't regret it. It was just a matter of GETTING OUT of that clinic. Last time, I didn't feel that way, but this time... I just didn't want to face that again, I just wanted it to be over. Taking the subway to work and walking a little bit really helped and I'm okay now. My mood is back to normal and I can finally say that I've moved on. Phew. What a morning! ;)

This afternoon, I'll meet a very old friend and her DH; we'll go see Shrek 3 and then we'll eat at a mexican restaurant. I'll have fun I'm sure. My sweetheart will pick me up at the train station at 9pm so I won't be too tired when I come back home and I'll have time to just relax at home.

Needless to say, I'll stick around until you lovelies have completed your cycles. I'm thinking of you all!

Lots of love,

Sophie
1st and 2nd IVF = BFN 1st FET BFP! m/c at 7 weeks. 2nd FET BFP! 3rd FET BFN
Image
Now let's spend the rest of our lives having fun together! Image
Jul1e
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Location: UK

Post by Jul1e »

ltaylor, thanks for your words, I'm still keeping my fingers crossed just in case. Lots of luck for tomorrow. Looking forward to hearing how you get on.

Jules x
me 33, dh 41
ttc 3 years
1st ivf feb 07 -BFN
2nd ivf june 07 - BFN
3rd ivf nov 07 - BFP! :)
[img]http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev207pr___.png[/img]
PMApsy
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Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2006 5:39 pm
Location: Montreal

Post by PMApsy »

ImageOur proud moms-to-be ImageImage
Imagemommytobe BFP! :D Congratulations! (Beta = 461 9dp5dt) First u/s on June?
ImageJenn BFP! :D Congratulations! Beta June 4th 918 (13dp3dt). Second beta June 7th 1893 (16dp3dt) :D U/s June 12th! One cute little beanie growing well! Due date Feb. 9th! Blood test and/or u/s June 14th.
ImageTansRN BFP! :D Congratulations! (Beta = 709 10dp5dt) TWINS ALERT! :D Second u/s on June 5th and everything looks fine! u/s June 13th, twins are looking good and developing well! Due date Jan 24th! Discharged to ob-gyn!
ImageMy2LnT BFP! :D Congratulations! (Beta = 98 11dp3dt) 2nd beta 221 (13dp3dt), 3rd beta 504 (15dp3dt), 4th beta 1829 (17dp3dt). U/s on June 1st showed a healthy little beanie; due date January 30th! :D u/s on June 12th showed a growing little beanie!
ImageJovigal BFP! :D Congratulations! (Beta = 87.9 10dp3dt) U/s on June 12th; heard the loveliest sound: a strong little heartbeat! Cutie grows fast and measures .64 cms; due date Jan. 31st or Feb 1st! Next u/s June 25th.
ImageNimble Positive HPT; natural pregnancy! Congratulations!

ImageGoing through the 2ww
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ImageJul1e 2 perfect embies transferred on June 5th, HTP June 15th (10dp5dt)Image
Imagejen779 2 perfect embies transferred on June 5th, beta June 19th (14dp3dt) 2 frosties left! Image

Embryo transfer
Image
ltaylor, Now on estradiol; waiting for FET planned for June 15th.

Ovarian stimulationImage
Image
ImageBabysoft First IVF cycle! started stimming June 4th! First u/s June 6th
Imagehrobinson started stimming June 2nd
ImageLiteratriz.... started Lupron May 15th; egg donor started stimming; donor is producing lots of good eggs! grow follies, grow! ER planned for June 18th or 19th!
ImageShantala.... starts stimming July 26th.

ImageOvarian vacation
Shantala.... starts downregging on June 30th; down regging check on July 24th.

Birth control pill Image
ImageShantala.... fresh ICSI cycle

Image In our thoughts and prayers Image
Imagemarsxp, we are sorry to learn the news of your BFN and we all send you love, hugs, and good luck wishes for your journey towards motherhood. Take care sweet friend.
Imagearizonakiwi, we are sorry to learn the news of your BFN and we all send you love, hugs, and good luck wishes for your journey towards motherhood. Take care sweet friend.
ImagePat19, we are sorry to learn the news of your BFN and we all send you love, hugs, and good luck wishes for your journey towards motherhood. Take care sweet friend.
Imagemandeeq, we are sorry to learn the news of your BFN and we all send you love, hugs, and good luck wishes for your journey towards motherhood. Take care sweet friend.
Imagegbnut, we are devastated to learn the news of your miscarriage and we all send you love, hugs, and good luck wishes for your journey towards motherhood. Take care sweet friend.
1st and 2nd IVF = BFN 1st FET BFP! m/c at 7 weeks. 2nd FET BFP! 3rd FET BFN
Image
Now let's spend the rest of our lives having fun together! Image
Jul1e
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Joined: Sun Feb 11, 2007 10:55 am
Location: UK

Post by Jul1e »

Sophie, sorry you had such a rotten day. that sounds truely horrible at the clinic. you'd think with all the money they take they'd know what day their appointments were on. Perhaps having that good cry today was theraputic even though it was not in the perfect place.

I so wish for us all to realise our dream of becoming parents. It takes several goes for many women.

Julie xx
me 33, dh 41
ttc 3 years
1st ivf feb 07 -BFN
2nd ivf june 07 - BFN
3rd ivf nov 07 - BFP! :)
[img]http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev207pr___.png[/img]
TansRN
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Joined: Sat Apr 15, 2006 7:13 pm
Location: Michigan

Post by TansRN »

Sophie
I am so sorry that you had such a bad morning. It doesnt help that we are all drugged up when trying to have a stiff upper lip. The meds really do not help that whole situation. I am happy to read that you have a good DH to supprt you. That is realy great. Its good to know that you are putting it behind you. IT is really hard to do that. REally hard. I hope that you can continue to look up and forcus on the future when you go to get your frosties....

Tia
Hang in there girl. I know how disheartening that can be. It is really disappointing. See what you blood work says. Praying for a healthy baby for you.

Susan
I am so sorry to hear about what is going on with you....I really am. I know how excited you were and all. I feel so bad that you have to go through this. It is such a bad feeling like your body let you down. It really does suck.



Image
Tanya

IVF #1- 6/2006-DH had vasectomy
VERY SADLY ended in m/c of a beautiful baby girl at 12 weeks on Aug. 28, 2006.

FET 1/2007 -ive
#2 IVF/ICSI-4/2007 BFP!!! 1st beta 708!!!!
Sophie and Riley Arrived Dec. 10th 2008!!!
mommytobe
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Posts: 71
Joined: Fri Apr 13, 2007 5:14 am
Location: NYC

Post by mommytobe »

Hi Everyone,

Thanks for all your kind words, it realy helped. I have been just taking it easy today. No more bleeding, just very light brown spotting. I really am trying to remain hopeful.

Julie, I remain hopeful for you sweetie. Hugs.

Sophie, That so horrible that you had to go through that at your clinic. Don't be afraid to cry, because Its an emotional thing this IVF. love ya.

Susan my sweetie, I am sending you hugs, I am hoping you day gets better, are you going to give another try, I hope you are.

Jenn779, how are you sweetie, I hope you having a much better day that the way mine got started.

Hugs
Tia
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;20704;35/st/20080220/k/50ba/preg.png[/img]
Jul1e
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Location: UK

Post by Jul1e »

Tia, thanks for your support, it means a lot. Not much spotting now so I'm a bit more hopeful again. I really hope you get good news tomorrow, my thoughts are with you, I'm sure all will be fine.

Susan, how you doing darling? Thinking of you.

Night all, see you tomorrow!

Jxx
me 33, dh 41
ttc 3 years
1st ivf feb 07 -BFN
2nd ivf june 07 - BFN
3rd ivf nov 07 - BFP! :)
[img]http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev207pr___.png[/img]
jenn
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Posts: 538
Joined: Thu Aug 17, 2006 2:29 pm
Location: USA

Post by jenn »

Well girls it looks like you all had quite a day.

Tia- I am so sorry you are going through this scare. But I think everyone else is right don't panic yet. A lot of women do have bleeding. I know it is hard, but try get through tonight and wait to see what the Dr. says tomorrow. You really had a good beta number!

Susan- I don't know what to say except I'm so sorry sweetie. No one should have to go through this, it seems cruel. Sending you hugs and praying for you. You are not a failure!!

Sophie- I'm sorry you had a rough day. I'm glad you told the clinic how you were feeling though. They need to know they made a mistake so it doesn't happen again. Let me know how Shrek 3 is. I want to see it too! Have fun tonight and laugh a lot!!
Jenn


[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/2;42;102/st/20080212/n/Anna/k/00c8/age.png[/img]

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arizonakiwi
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Location: New Zealand

Post by arizonakiwi »

Sophie – I am sorry you had a hard time at the clinic – they can be so insensitive at times. I think it is because it is just another normal day for them and they forget how much of a critical part of our life it is. Unfortunately in a job like theirs when they are dealing with people going through a procedure like this they can’t let any of us be just another person to pass through the system….. I am sorry it was so hard at the clinic The first time when my cycle was cancelled I burst into tears in front of the doctor I desperately wanted to escape and get into the car to have a good cry (I think he wanted to let me calm down before I had to walk past everyone in the waiting room). All he could say was I guess this is really important to you……
With my BFN this time I was upset the 1st day then ok for a couple of days then on the Friday I was really upset and the smallest thing made me burst into tears (not like me at all) and I spent Friday night crying my eyes out…. I much better now thankfully….

I hope you enjoyed Shrek. DH and I went last night – We were driving home and I was wondering how many others here might be doing the same thing in the next few days….we are all in different parts of the world but there are parts of our lives that criss cross time and time again, different place, different time but at the end of the day what we are all wanting, living for and doing is very similar

Susan –Lots of hugs coming your way, I know nothing will make this any easier but you are in my thoughts.

Jen – 5 days to go, hang in there. I hope you are feeling a little better.

Jovigal – M/S !! People must think we are mad looking forward to it but anything that makes it feel real is a blessing after all the waiting we have been through !!

Steph – love the photos, one little treasure is perfect

Literatriz – Enjoy your flights and your time in Brazil, your babies aren’t far away !!!
Julie – little spotting – hang in there, it is hard but

Jenn – How are things going – I hope you are getting plenty of rest – are you telling people yet or keeping it quite

Julie – I hope it is just a scare and you will surprise us with a BFP tomorrow

Ltaylor – your babies will be home soon – you have done really well.

Tia – I hope you will make it through….. sending you lots of hugs.

Love to you all

Angela
Me 37 DH 54
3rd IVF/ICSI Nov 07 BFN
March 08 FET BFN
June & Aug 09 DI BFN
mommytobe
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Posts: 71
Joined: Fri Apr 13, 2007 5:14 am
Location: NYC

Post by mommytobe »

Hi Everyone,

I am feeling much much, better my spotting is almost gone, very very light. I was reading a lot on signs of pg and more on ivf and spotting is always on this list so I am more hopeful than this morning. Really hope this is the last of the spotting. Actually i can deal with some light spotting not actual blood.

Julie, :) I am soo happy your spotting lighten up a bit. You are on your way.

Jenn Thanks for the encouragement

Angela, you are so sweet

Sending you all baby dust

Hugs
Tia
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arizonakiwi
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Location: New Zealand

Post by arizonakiwi »

Tia,

Glad it is almost gone, keeping everything crossed that a BFP is on its way for you !!!!!!

Angela
Me 37 DH 54
3rd IVF/ICSI Nov 07 BFN
March 08 FET BFN
June & Aug 09 DI BFN
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