2 week wait anxiety!

[Mandy J]

The first time,mine didn't work, I put it down to a car accident...not a bad one but upsetting the system

The next 2 were frozen transfers and the embryos had fragmented slightly, but I didn't ease off at work, when your self employed if you don't work you don't get paid!!! I was still lifting etc etc..... I think my eggs got scrambled!

So last time I took a week off work and it worked, but the day I went back to work I was hanging Christmas decorations etc and started bleeding. Whether it is all linked I don't know, but this time I have taken the whole month off work and doing very little...so fingers crossed! Also taking baby aspirin and had acupuncture and eating alkaline diet! (Rita West's guide to getting pregnant book is good has anyone read it?)

I'm very lucky, I don't seem to get any bad side effects with the treatment, just slight tenderness in the boobs and of course the pain after egg collection and empty purse! I asked husband if I am more grumpy...but he says no more than usual! I am getting worried that I have actually started to enjoy the injections!!!!!!!!!

This will probably be our last cycle, I am not sure if we have any frozen embryos this time, they told me to ring the next day as they were borderline quality to be frozen, but really I don't even want to think about those just yet until I know about this one.

If we do have some frozen, we will of course do that cycle, but if not I am going to buy a horse, have lots of exotic holidays and be a rich aunty, so my nephews and nieces run around after me when I'm old and grey(er) wanting to get all my money (I wish!) Then I'll leave it all to a cats home!

I refuse to let this get me down, I went for a lot of years not expecting to have children, my husband had a vasectomy with 1st wife, but when I hit 30, I decided that I would at least like to give it a go, so hubby had a reversal, which showed positive at the time, then scarring blocked tubes again. He then had PESA to extract sperm. Obviously I feel a bit sad when it does fail, but I know that life is too good to waste.

Good luck everyone

[RMSM]

Mandy, your attitude is a great one and I admire you for that. I'm definitely on board with you in terms of knowing how important it is to live a good life and not make yourself all crazy with this. I'm on my 2nd IVF, so I'm not quite ready to throw in the towel, but my husband and I are living in 2 separate countries in order to do this and I often miss the life I had when I wasn't so focused on this. I hope you continue to write on the boards despite what your results are. It seems like you're time off from work may help and I wish you nothing but the best.

[rdevine]

Just checking in...still going crazy with the 2ww...I did not have the best quality embryos, so I have not gotten my hopes up for this cycle. It is still killing me though. I think the worst part is that the progesterone is making me cranky.

[Aliann09]

Well I think I am officially starting to make myself crazy My friend brought her 1 yr old over today and he was so funny I forgot about the nothing heavy bit I actually picked him up Thank God my DH wasn't here or I would be totally cut off from everything. It didn't hurt me or anything but of course now I am paranoid. That might actually be a legit concern but I actually laughed so hard today that my gut ached and all I could think was OMG I laughed the babies right out! how pathetic is that lol! anyway I think I just need to do something besides lay around watch movies and read I mean you have to have a normal life right? You can't worry about sneezing, laughing and living right? In case you can't tell I am waiting for someone to talk me off my ledge 9 days to go good luck everyone I will be saying lots of prayers!
Ali

[Vlada]

Hey,
My embryos were not very good quality either plus they were all fragmented, but I am still staying positive!!!
Today is my first day after bed rest and i think i was running around too much, so eventually i got horrible cramps kinda in the low part om my uterus, going down to my pubuc bone, and then i felt like something hot was running down my private area and spreading everywhere. I ran to the doctor becasue i was close to the clinic and he said that it was all normal . Well, it subsided after about 30 minutes, but i still have wierd cramps off and on and I got a huge pimple that i only get before my period. So, i made a conclusion that my cramps were either implantation or the embryos have died, i really hope it was implantation though!!!

tahnk you for listening! We are a great support group for each other!! Baby dust to all!!!


PS Oh, and i POAS today and of course it was negative, what was i thinking being only 4dp3dt, but i am an addict
Vlada

[rdevine]

I have gotten horrible breakouts too, but I am blaming the progesterone. I just don't know what to think anymore.

Today I am having cramps in the area of my right ovary. I hope I did not develop another cyst. Monday's test can't come soon enough.

[RMSM]

I'm at day 9 post transfer and my best friend just told me she is pregnant! I handled it well, asll things considered, but don't think I didn't wake up at 4 am thinking about it! I spent the past 2 days dealing with a surge of hormones, sweating, cranky, irritable, etc, but today it all stopped. No signs of pregnancy at all. I'm feeling down, but am going out to lunch with my sister and stuffing my face. I test on Monday and haven't taken HPT yet and probably won't becaus ethey scare me. I cramped the whole first week after ET, but they've subsided pretty much. ANyone else focusing on any kind of sign they can and driving themselves crazy? I wish I had a pimple!!

[woodcliff]

Hi all. I too am 9 days post-transfer, but my blood test is tomorrow, Friday the 17th. I too will not do an HPT...too scared to jinx anything!

My hubby, and MD, is trying to get me to the hospital today for the blood test...because it's a "quantitative" not "qualitative" blood test...meaning that they count HCG "levels" by #.

While he's probably right...what diff will 16 hours really make, if I get it today at 4:00 or tomorrow at 7:30 or 8:00 a.m.? I could always retest tomorrow afternoon, if the test is 'iffy'.

***Anyone know if a negative means ZERO HCG levels (god I hope I have the initials right...)

But I'm a scardey-cat (spelling) and will most likely wait until tomorrow...to get the test...sometimes I feel it worked (really full gut feeling, most cramping is gone, and excessively tired the past 24 hours), at others I think it did not. ie: My boobs no longer hurt, that makes me wonder if I lost the embryos...3 days ago my boobs quit hurting.

Odd, but during the times I feel it did not take? I feel freer, not so boxed in...in many ways the thought of being preggers scares me more than anything on the planet...
Anyone else ever feel that way? THANKS

[Vlada]

I know what you mean, i did feel so relieved (oddly enough) to find out that it was negative after my fresh cycle. I think that it is the stress playing games with us. I hope you do get pregnant though!!!
All of my symptoms are gone as well, except that my breasts are sore just a liilte bit around nipple area and this morning i had cramps that i usually get before my period. I tested again with HPT today and it was negative, but it its still way to early to tell.
Baby dust to all!!
Vlada

[woodcliff]

Vlada, Thank you so much for your kind response!

It's just odd, thinking of a 'negative' I imagine what I'd do with a free month, or even 3 weeks if we go onto the next one immediately (have 10 frozen, AKA Frosties!) ... sigh...not winning to lose during this wait.

Is your blood test on the 21st? I wish you a positive test as well...

ALL the best
Me

[Mandy J]

I really enjoyed my last gap between cycles, last year was just constant IVF, so we had a break of 7th Months....thats 7 months of wine...beer....& feeling a bit more fun!

Back to the tee total again now....hopefully for the next 9 months, but if my results come back negative next week I will be straight to the off licence for wine and a HUGE bar of chocolate (I lost 3 stone before this treatment to try to increase success rate)

I've been so tired today, I went into such a deep sleep during the afternoon with such strange dreams, I dreamt I was pregnant with 8 babies (only 2 embyos transferred), I guess I don't let stress affect me emotionally too much, so it comes out in other ways.

Has anyone had experiences of their partners struggling with the emotions of all this? I'm sure my husband has been sneaking some of my injections....he is such a grump sometimes!!!!

[RMSM]

I like that we're talking about life after this because it does help us deal with a negative much more easily. I am testing in 4 days and will be thrilled if it's a BFP, but also scared that it'll change at some point. Getting pregnant is only the first step. I wish there was more attention put on us while we wait, like a test every other day to see some number change or something. All I do is feel my boobs and look for staining on my underware. Does everyone who gets a BFP have sore boobs before test day? I wonder. Well, let's keep communicating because the days are getting closer and it's getting tougher and tougher. s anyone waking up in the middle of the night, unable to fall back to sleep (anyone who is normally a solid sleeper)?

[Bean]

Hi,ladies.I wish you good luck with pregnancy test!!!
I'm going to start my lupron shots these days.

[RMSM]

Good luck, Bean! This is actually the exciting part....the part where you get to see things happening and growing and fertilizing. I hope you respond well to the treatment. Keep us posted!!

[Vlada]

Woodcliff,
I test Aug 23rd , not soon enough!!! . I really really hope that you, me and all of the people in this thread get BFPs!!!
I am actually having period kind cramps as i type, not too bad, but i can feel it, can you imagine if all of my 4 embies have implanted?!?! I hope not, just one would be fine with me.
Good luck to all of us!!!
Vlada