Mine really wanted to have a baby the standard way but as that hasn't been successful yet (one m/c, no children) and I'm over 40. We didn't start trying until this spring, shortly after we married.
Anyway, he knows the odds aren't great and I know he thinks the whole thing is a little weird. Just wondering if other women have men that have mixed emotions about IVF and how they deal with it.
Thanks in advance for your responses.
Laura
Anyone have hubbies who are "iffy" about IVF?
Anyone have hubbies who are "iffy" about IVF?
TTC #1
Age 42
M/C June 07, starting ttc in March 07
1 cycle with Clomid and HCG-didn't work
IVF #1- December 07, BFP..chemical pg
IVF #2- May 08, beta test 5/26
Age 42
M/C June 07, starting ttc in March 07
1 cycle with Clomid and HCG-didn't work
IVF #1- December 07, BFP..chemical pg
IVF #2- May 08, beta test 5/26
Hi Boo1
I think that's pretty common for men to feel that way at first. My husband was against IVF until we got the diagnosis of male factor. Then for the 1st cycle he was really luke warm about the whole thing. It didn't work that time & we took a couple of years break to think about our other reproductive options. He ended up being the one who really wanted to try all this again, so here we are. Now he's really excited & involved. I think it just takes men longer.
2ndtimer
I think that's pretty common for men to feel that way at first. My husband was against IVF until we got the diagnosis of male factor. Then for the 1st cycle he was really luke warm about the whole thing. It didn't work that time & we took a couple of years break to think about our other reproductive options. He ended up being the one who really wanted to try all this again, so here we are. Now he's really excited & involved. I think it just takes men longer.
2ndtimer
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Faithinababy
- Member
- Posts: 70
- Joined: Wed Mar 28, 2007 3:15 pm
Hello -
It really took my hubby time to finally accept what I wanted to do. We got married at the age of 18 and I could never get prego later I found out I had 4th stage endometriosis and with the doctors telling us to try and try it will happen so that is what hubby always wanted to do "TRY". I finally turned 27 and him 31 and we both have great careers and got to finally convince him that this is the time. He was terrified to do the sperm analysis and find out there was a problem with him. He later confessed to me that he was terrified of that test. Well, he came back super normal with great sperm count so he was out of the question. Doctor sat down with him and explained to him everything that would happen and out chances of having a baby so he was finally convinced. But everday during the treatment he would always assure me that he loved me no matter what and that I dont have to do this but I did really want to try this I felt in my heart this was it. During the 2ww he was really upset and told me that we should of never done this and that he was really worried of the results because I was having really bad cramps which I thought is was my period coming. Then I finally went for my blood test and it came back "POSITIVE" YAY!!!! It really worked for us on our very first try and my hubby finally took a deep breathe and is glad we did this. I think they just worry how we will react if it does not work they love us soo much that they dont want to see us hurt. Look at us we are 22 weeks going on 23 and having our little boy in March. He is a true miracle and we would do it all over again in a heartbeat. You just got to talk to your hubby and let him know that everything will be ok and to have lots and lots of FAITH and pray alot.
Good Luck!
Hilda
It really took my hubby time to finally accept what I wanted to do. We got married at the age of 18 and I could never get prego later I found out I had 4th stage endometriosis and with the doctors telling us to try and try it will happen so that is what hubby always wanted to do "TRY". I finally turned 27 and him 31 and we both have great careers and got to finally convince him that this is the time. He was terrified to do the sperm analysis and find out there was a problem with him. He later confessed to me that he was terrified of that test. Well, he came back super normal with great sperm count so he was out of the question. Doctor sat down with him and explained to him everything that would happen and out chances of having a baby so he was finally convinced. But everday during the treatment he would always assure me that he loved me no matter what and that I dont have to do this but I did really want to try this I felt in my heart this was it. During the 2ww he was really upset and told me that we should of never done this and that he was really worried of the results because I was having really bad cramps which I thought is was my period coming. Then I finally went for my blood test and it came back "POSITIVE" YAY!!!! It really worked for us on our very first try and my hubby finally took a deep breathe and is glad we did this. I think they just worry how we will react if it does not work they love us soo much that they dont want to see us hurt. Look at us we are 22 weeks going on 23 and having our little boy in March. He is a true miracle and we would do it all over again in a heartbeat. You just got to talk to your hubby and let him know that everything will be ok and to have lots and lots of FAITH and pray alot.
Good Luck!
Hilda
Re: Anyone have hubbies who are "iffy" about IVF?
Boo, this is a very common reaction from men. My dh loves kids...we have one from natural conception and have been wanting another one for several yrs. We have male factor issues. But he has been hesitant about ICSI due to possible risks involved. I feel men don't like to talk about their feelings as much as we women do... so sometimes it leads us to believe they are not interested. But the reality in many cases is that they are interested. They are just not that open & as action-oriented as we women are. We should not take this personally!!