HI GIRLS,
I HAVEN'T WRITTEN IN A WHILE SINCE MY BFN IN AUGUST. MY HUSBAND DECIDED TO WAIT AND TRY MAYBE IN A FEW YEARS ONCE OUR FINACIAL SITUATION LOOKS BETTER. AND WITH THAT I DIDN'T EVEN MAKE MY BFN APPOINTMENT WITH THE DOCTOR-TOO SAD I GUESS.
IT TOOK A LIITLE WHILE BUT I EXECPTED WE HAD TO WAIT, THEN EVERYONE AROUND ME STARTED TO BECOME PREGNANT OR GIVE BIRTH AND SOON I SEEN BABIES EVERYWHERE EXEPT HERE!!
I JUST FEEL THAT CLOCK TICKING AND I'M HOPING MY TIME DOESN'T RUN OUT BEFORE I HAVE A BABY OF MY OWN. DON'T GET ME WRONG I'M HAPPY FOR EVEYONE I KNOW ITS JUST ALL AT ONCE. EX- THE PAST 2MONTHS ALONE-
3 COWORKERS HAVE EITHER GAVE BIRTH OR ANNOUCED THEY ARE PREGNANT, MY SISTER N LAW HAD HER 2ND CHILD IN A 1YR 1/2, MY COUSIN AND HER DAUGHTER, MY BEST FRIEND CANDY HAD HER DAUGHTER, ANOTHER FRIENDS DAUGHTER HAD HER DAUGHTER THREE DAYS AGO, AND MY HUSBAND COUSIN JUST ANOUNCED SHE IS HAVING A GIRL!! IT JUST ALOT IN MY FACE AT ONE TIME.
I AM VERY HAPPY FOR THEM ALL IT JUST MAKES ME FEEL EMPTY.
SORRY GIRLS JUST NEEDED TO VENT JUST BEEN A ROUGH WEEK.
FEELING EMPTY
FEELING EMPTY
AMBER 30, DH 28
1 ST IVF CANCELLED
2ND IVF 7/20/07
BFN 8-1-07
BLOCKED TUBES/PCOS
TTC SINCE 2001
1 ST IVF CANCELLED
2ND IVF 7/20/07
BFN 8-1-07
BLOCKED TUBES/PCOS
TTC SINCE 2001
Hi Amber,
I just feel the same as you do.
Sometimes i feel that it is a "sign" seeing babies or pregnant women .
But maybe this gives us hope to never surrender.
Science is in progress and we still have a chance,
My doctor just told me about a new method for helping implantation by using laser.
Wishing all ladies the best of luck and a BFP.
Mina.
I just feel the same as you do.
Sometimes i feel that it is a "sign" seeing babies or pregnant women .
But maybe this gives us hope to never surrender.
Science is in progress and we still have a chance,
My doctor just told me about a new method for helping implantation by using laser.
Wishing all ladies the best of luck and a BFP.
Mina.
Me 34, DH 34
1st IUI 2004 – failed
2nd IUI 2005 – low HCG, (chemical pregnancy)
Laparoscopy – blocked tubes
1st IVF 2/2006 – BFN
2nd IVF 4/2007 – low HCG, BFN
3rd ….SOON
1st IUI 2004 – failed
2nd IUI 2005 – low HCG, (chemical pregnancy)
Laparoscopy – blocked tubes
1st IVF 2/2006 – BFN
2nd IVF 4/2007 – low HCG, BFN
3rd ….SOON
Amber,
I completely understand how you are feeling. Sometimes I actually get panicky that this won't happen for me, but then I have to realize that my time will come it is just taking longer than most. I know I am meant to be a mom so one way or another it will happen.
As you can see from my profile, I seem to function best when I am in 'action' hence why I have done so many cycles in such a short period of time. But my DH is older so I feel like every minute counts.
Take the time you need and then come back to this whole process with a renewed excitement. But if waiting is stressing you out, then perhaps you might consider starting again when you are ready.
Whatever happens, you know we are all here for you and all of us completely understand how you are feeling.
I am pretty much the only one left of my friends who hasn't had a baby. Its been hard but it sure doesn't mean that I am not thrilled for them - just that their success higlights our failure to conceive. It is tough but just think of what kind of moms and dads we'll be once we get our babies!!!
I completely understand how you are feeling. Sometimes I actually get panicky that this won't happen for me, but then I have to realize that my time will come it is just taking longer than most. I know I am meant to be a mom so one way or another it will happen.
As you can see from my profile, I seem to function best when I am in 'action' hence why I have done so many cycles in such a short period of time. But my DH is older so I feel like every minute counts.
Take the time you need and then come back to this whole process with a renewed excitement. But if waiting is stressing you out, then perhaps you might consider starting again when you are ready.
Whatever happens, you know we are all here for you and all of us completely understand how you are feeling.
I am pretty much the only one left of my friends who hasn't had a baby. Its been hard but it sure doesn't mean that I am not thrilled for them - just that their success higlights our failure to conceive. It is tough but just think of what kind of moms and dads we'll be once we get our babies!!!
7 IVF cycles - 2 chemicals, 5 BFN
1 FET cycle - BFN
9th IVF cycle - BFP!! Twins born Sept 18/08
Trying again May 2010!!!
1 FET cycle - BFN
9th IVF cycle - BFP!! Twins born Sept 18/08
Trying again May 2010!!!
Hi Amber,
I feel like I could have written that post myself. My husband and I have been trying since 2002. We were the first of our friends and family to get married and we tried right away to have a baby. Five years later, we still have no child and are now at least 2 babies behind everyone else!
Believe me, I wouldn't want anyone I love to go through what we have gone through. But it doesn't make it any less difficult to have it in your face all the time either. The week I miscarried, I learned my cousin was pregnant.
I wish I could give you some advice that would make it easier for you, but I haven't figured it out yet! All I can say is to not give up hope and vent all you want on the message boards! Sometimes it just feels better to get it all out...especially to people who understand your position!
I wish you the best of luck!
I feel like I could have written that post myself. My husband and I have been trying since 2002. We were the first of our friends and family to get married and we tried right away to have a baby. Five years later, we still have no child and are now at least 2 babies behind everyone else!
Believe me, I wouldn't want anyone I love to go through what we have gone through. But it doesn't make it any less difficult to have it in your face all the time either. The week I miscarried, I learned my cousin was pregnant.
I wish I could give you some advice that would make it easier for you, but I haven't figured it out yet! All I can say is to not give up hope and vent all you want on the message boards! Sometimes it just feels better to get it all out...especially to people who understand your position!
I wish you the best of luck!
Me 36; DH 35
3 natural M/Cs, 1 IUI, 2 ectopics, lost both tubes, endometriosis
12/05: 1st IVF, BFN :(
9/07: FET, chemical
11/07: 2nd IVF, BFN :(
2/08: endometrioma removed
4/08: 3rd IVF, BFP :) but beta only 34 :(
3 natural M/Cs, 1 IUI, 2 ectopics, lost both tubes, endometriosis
12/05: 1st IVF, BFN :(
9/07: FET, chemical
11/07: 2nd IVF, BFN :(
2/08: endometrioma removed
4/08: 3rd IVF, BFP :) but beta only 34 :(
Hi Amber,
I feel like I could have written that post myself. My husband and I have been trying since 2002. We were the first of our friends and family to get married and we tried right away to have a baby. Five years later, we still have no child and are now at least 2 babies behind everyone else!
Believe me, I wouldn't want anyone I love to go through what we have gone through. But it doesn't make it any less difficult to have it in your face all the time either. The week I miscarried, I learned my cousin was pregnant.
I wish I could give you some advice that would make it easier for you, but I haven't figured it out yet! All I can say is to not give up hope and vent all you want on the message boards! Sometimes it just feels better to get it all out...especially to people who understand your position!
I wish you the best of luck!
I feel like I could have written that post myself. My husband and I have been trying since 2002. We were the first of our friends and family to get married and we tried right away to have a baby. Five years later, we still have no child and are now at least 2 babies behind everyone else!
Believe me, I wouldn't want anyone I love to go through what we have gone through. But it doesn't make it any less difficult to have it in your face all the time either. The week I miscarried, I learned my cousin was pregnant.
I wish I could give you some advice that would make it easier for you, but I haven't figured it out yet! All I can say is to not give up hope and vent all you want on the message boards! Sometimes it just feels better to get it all out...especially to people who understand your position!
I wish you the best of luck!
Me 36; DH 35
3 natural M/Cs, 1 IUI, 2 ectopics, lost both tubes, endometriosis
12/05: 1st IVF, BFN :(
9/07: FET, chemical
11/07: 2nd IVF, BFN :(
2/08: endometrioma removed
4/08: 3rd IVF, BFP :) but beta only 34 :(
3 natural M/Cs, 1 IUI, 2 ectopics, lost both tubes, endometriosis
12/05: 1st IVF, BFN :(
9/07: FET, chemical
11/07: 2nd IVF, BFN :(
2/08: endometrioma removed
4/08: 3rd IVF, BFP :) but beta only 34 :(
I completely know how you feel. My BFN was just in September and the week after I got it my sister called and said she was pregnant. She felt bad that the timing on it was hard for me. But, I sank so low after that. Not that I am not happy for her, I love my nieces and nephews. But they are just that, not mine. Now I got a little excited that af was late and that I might be pregnant naturally and then she just came today!! So now that disappointment sets back in. It is hard, but life will go on and I have to keep reminding myself of that. Just too many people around me telling me they are pregnant. But thanks ladies for letting me vent as well. You are such great support.
Me 26 DH 30
Married 8 yrs TTC 7yrs
Natural Preg. M/C 11 wks
Natural Preg. Tubal (loss of Rt. tube)
Natural Preg. M/C 6wks
HSG (Jan 2007) Showed left tube blocked and wasn't able to be unblocked
1st ivf BFN
2nd attempt May??
Married 8 yrs TTC 7yrs
Natural Preg. M/C 11 wks
Natural Preg. Tubal (loss of Rt. tube)
Natural Preg. M/C 6wks
HSG (Jan 2007) Showed left tube blocked and wasn't able to be unblocked
1st ivf BFN
2nd attempt May??
Hi Amber and everyone else, I can really empathise with that empty feeling. Myself and DH married in 2003 and started trying straight away. I just got my BFN 2 weeks ago. At my review the doc told us to make love and keep trying naturally until after Christmas. I can't imagine making love again - for pleasure?? It's just too disppointing when AFs come. I ovulated this weekend and now I feel consumed with guilt that I didn't even try. I just can't seem to shake these hopeless feelings. I can't bear to see families at the moment. I feel a bit scared in fact because I don't know where I'm going.
me 27
DH 40
TTC 4yrs
Endo - stge 3
1st IVF - October 2007 - BFN
DH 40
TTC 4yrs
Endo - stge 3
1st IVF - October 2007 - BFN
Hi girls,
I wanted to stay away from the MB as it was tough after my BFN 2 days ago. I expected it but really didn't think I would have such a hard time getting over it. We have been TTC since 2004, 4 failed IUIs and did first IVF in sept. The day I got the BFN, I received an email from a friend with photos of her newborn girl, how hard is that?
You start asking yourself, everything went perfect, so why didn't it stick? I know I shouldnt but I started going on a guilt trip, blaming myself for it. If not for DH's love and support, I don't think I can even bring myself to write this post. It has just been so hard trying to stay positive when everything is beyond your control and nothing seems to go your way.
Kellym, I really admire your strength, like you i need to be in action. The period when I was out of action and friends around started getting preg, I was a total wreck. I tell myself I will keep trying until I get it right, and like DH says, it's all a matter of probability, sooner or later it's gonna happen. I just hope when the time calls for it I will have the strength like you.
Thanks girls, everyone of you, for taking the time to read and give comfort when spirits are low. Baby dust to all.
I wanted to stay away from the MB as it was tough after my BFN 2 days ago. I expected it but really didn't think I would have such a hard time getting over it. We have been TTC since 2004, 4 failed IUIs and did first IVF in sept. The day I got the BFN, I received an email from a friend with photos of her newborn girl, how hard is that?
You start asking yourself, everything went perfect, so why didn't it stick? I know I shouldnt but I started going on a guilt trip, blaming myself for it. If not for DH's love and support, I don't think I can even bring myself to write this post. It has just been so hard trying to stay positive when everything is beyond your control and nothing seems to go your way.
Kellym, I really admire your strength, like you i need to be in action. The period when I was out of action and friends around started getting preg, I was a total wreck. I tell myself I will keep trying until I get it right, and like DH says, it's all a matter of probability, sooner or later it's gonna happen. I just hope when the time calls for it I will have the strength like you.
Thanks girls, everyone of you, for taking the time to read and give comfort when spirits are low. Baby dust to all.
HI GIRLS,,
ITS GOOD TO KNOW I'M NOT ALONE IN MY FEARS AND WORRIES.
MY HUSBAND TRIES TO UNDERSTAND BUT IN THE SAME HE TRULEY CAN'T. I KNOW HE FEELS THE DEVASTATION BUT I DON'T THINK HE TRULY UNDERSTANDS. I HAD TO DRIVE TWO HRS TO MY APPTS SO HE WASN'T ABLE TO GO MOST OF THE TIME AND REALLY DIDN'T SEE WHAT I WENT THROUGH AND YOU GIRLS DO AND THAT HELPS.
MY HUSBAND IS TRULEY A GREAT MAN. BUT IT'S NICE TO KNOW I'M NOT ALONE. BABY DUST TO US ALL!!!
ITS GOOD TO KNOW I'M NOT ALONE IN MY FEARS AND WORRIES.
MY HUSBAND TRIES TO UNDERSTAND BUT IN THE SAME HE TRULEY CAN'T. I KNOW HE FEELS THE DEVASTATION BUT I DON'T THINK HE TRULY UNDERSTANDS. I HAD TO DRIVE TWO HRS TO MY APPTS SO HE WASN'T ABLE TO GO MOST OF THE TIME AND REALLY DIDN'T SEE WHAT I WENT THROUGH AND YOU GIRLS DO AND THAT HELPS.
MY HUSBAND IS TRULEY A GREAT MAN. BUT IT'S NICE TO KNOW I'M NOT ALONE. BABY DUST TO US ALL!!!
AMBER 30, DH 28
1 ST IVF CANCELLED
2ND IVF 7/20/07
BFN 8-1-07
BLOCKED TUBES/PCOS
TTC SINCE 2001
1 ST IVF CANCELLED
2ND IVF 7/20/07
BFN 8-1-07
BLOCKED TUBES/PCOS
TTC SINCE 2001
Hi Amber,
I know you don't want to hear this, but you're 9 years younger than me. You have lots & lots of time. It's definitely going to work for you. Have no fear! My DH & myself had IVF in 2004 -BFN. We took off about 2 years after that and I have to tell you it was time well spent. We took some vacations, went out with friends, really just enjoyed ourselves. Our poor old dog died, so we really didn't have a lot of responsibilities. We could just up & decide to go to the beach or the mountains for the weekend. It was a good time & brought us closer together. During that time we almost went through with applying for adoption, but at the last minute we changed our minds & here we are back at IVF. I'm feeling positive that it will work.
God has given you some extra time to enjoy being young with your husband, no real responsibilities, go enjoy yourself. Be young & carefree for a couple more years, then get back on the baby train.
Good luck to you,
2ndtimer
I know you don't want to hear this, but you're 9 years younger than me. You have lots & lots of time. It's definitely going to work for you. Have no fear! My DH & myself had IVF in 2004 -BFN. We took off about 2 years after that and I have to tell you it was time well spent. We took some vacations, went out with friends, really just enjoyed ourselves. Our poor old dog died, so we really didn't have a lot of responsibilities. We could just up & decide to go to the beach or the mountains for the weekend. It was a good time & brought us closer together. During that time we almost went through with applying for adoption, but at the last minute we changed our minds & here we are back at IVF. I'm feeling positive that it will work.
God has given you some extra time to enjoy being young with your husband, no real responsibilities, go enjoy yourself. Be young & carefree for a couple more years, then get back on the baby train.
Good luck to you,
2ndtimer