Thanks to everyone...

[kbat]

I just wanted to thank everyone for their wonderful support!! It's great to know that there are so many nice and caring people out there.

I just completed--I should almost completed--5th and last cycle. I say almost completed because I have to go in for my 3rd beta test tomorrow, but since I got AF this afternoon, I know that my little glimmer of hope has gone out.

We really wanted to do 6 total IVF's but the only 2 clinics in my state weren't exactly a good fit for us. I don't have any relatives and very friends in RI and w/ my husband's hectic work schedule, I was alway on the verge of possibly cancelling b/c I wouldn't have a ride home. So traveling out of state (which we must do for e/r & e/t) would be way too difficult. And no new clinic would want to take me on for just one more cycle... I guess at some point, I have to say enough is enough.

I am very sad at the prospect that having a child or any children is not in my cards. I suppose that I will get over it as time passes. I never thought that this would happen to me, but I suppose things could be worse.

Anyway, again thanks to all those who gave me words of encouragement! I really hope the best for everyone and that everyone's dreams come true!!!! BABY DUST TO EVERYONE!!!

[dcu917]

kbat,

I am very sad to hear your news. I pray that you and your husband find peace. I also pray that someday God blesses you with a child or in some other way so you can share your nurturing spirit.

Take care,
Diane

[boo1]

Kbat, I really admire your strength. You've been through so much and you're okay! I pray that God continues to bless you with His peace.

Hugs,
Laura

[kholtan]

I read posts like your and I wonder why it works for some and not for sweet women like you? I shouldn't question God or anyone else but it makes me sad to see it.
I really hope your dreams come true of having children. You seem like a women with a huge heart and tons of strength. Best of luck to you and dh and may your hearts heal in Godspeed.

Take care~
Kimberly

[kbat]

Thanks to for all the kind words. I wish I were stronger. I know that once the intial disappointment is over, I am sure I will o.k. I hate to have to make a decision based on what others will or will not permit. The biggest wish I have is that these clinics have more compassion and try to work w/ patients to figure out to accomplish something ,and not put in obstacles w/ simple solutions that prevent people from maybe pursuing their dreams. Sometimes I wish I still lived in the NY metro area b/c maybe I would have more options w/ different clinics. But you must do the best w/ what you are dealt w/. But in the end, even if they were more flexible, who knows if it would have worked or not. I am getting older (will be 41 in Feb) and maybe the chance diminish for me w/ every passing year. I also have read about others heartbreak, and while trying not to question God, I do wonder sometimes why some people get to have kids who don't seem like they should while others who would make wonderful parents can't seem to have any. but I guess it's not for me to decide this and I will never really know the answer to this issue.

Again thanks everyone for their support. There a lot of strong women (and let's not forget our dh's), who are very strong and caring people. I do hope and pray that things turn out for the best for everyone. Best of luck to everyone out there

[Hopeful at 40]

I got pregnant one month past my 41st birthday -- with an ivf clinic in colorado, called CCRM. They work with many out of state patients. I started my meds in Chicago, and then traveled to Denver for 10 days for the rest of the monitoring, and IVF removal/transfer. They are the best in the nation. It might be worth looking into. I'm pregnant with a little boy, and due March 1st, 3 months before my 42nd birthday! I hope you find this encouraging. FYI: I wrote my "story" under a post titled, "Best Advice for IVF'ers". You might find it inspiring.

[kbat]

CONGRATULATIONS!!! THAT'S WONDERFUL!!

I wish I could be so lucky to travel. however, we are NOT self pay. Our insurance covers 100% of the cost, however, we have to go to one of their approved clinics in our area. Plus, my dh had difficulities getting off work sometimes just to deal w/ this locally, it would be too difficult to try to figure it out over thousands of miles. My biggest problem is that if my dh is unavailable the day of the e/t, I have no one who can take me up there and drive me home and they will not allow for us to hire a car service. I know each clinic seems to be different in how they handle stuff like that, but it would seem too difficult to handle. But I really appreciate the advice. Who knows, maybe I will look into it.

thanks again for thoughts, and I will check out your thread....