The Over 40 Crowd

Gracielope2 · Post by **Gracielope2** » Mon Dec 17, 2007 2:54 pm

Chriss: One more day and you get to the BFP news! Are you feeling any better, or more anxious knowing it's tomorrow. Try and relax - easier said then done - tomorrow will be hear before you know it. I thought and said a prayer for you over the weekend.

Sonia: It's easy to feel low, especially going through infertility. Hang in there the perfect donor will be chosen for you. BTW: Thanks for your words of encouragement.

Andrea: Glad to hear things are moving along. I hope the mock cycle goes well. I think it's great that you have a FET option in Jan.

DJB: How are you feeling? Hope you're doing ok.

Hi to Tammy, Catharine, Yasmina, LuAnne, JenB, and anyone that I've missed.....

I was really nervous over the weekend. Friday, I had some specs of blood, and Saturday I had spotting as well. I called RE and was told not to worry, it's normal. I've been wanting to hear "you're pregnant" for 2 years now, I finally heard the words that I yearned for, and thougth that I would be excited and calm. Totally wrong! I'm really nervous, my BF is correct in saying that it's constant worry.

I'm reading the really good book and it says: When wanting something, you have to keep believing and watching for the good things to come. You should make a conscious decision, and act of your will, to maintain an attitude of "expectancy" and keep your mind filled with thoughts of hope. In other words.... PMA!!!

chriss · Post by **chriss** » Mon Dec 17, 2007 3:45 pm

Hi Sonia, good to hear from you. I'm thinking of you and hoping you hear good news from your upcoming scan on Thursday. Thanks for sending me the PMA. I really appreciate it.

Gracie, is that the name of the book? The Really Good Book? I'd like to look into it. It sounds good. I need to remind myself to have PMA. Right now it is so tough. I hope that you are doing well. I keep thinking of you. I know the worry will never end, but do try to enjoy the positives. You have come a long way.

I cried on my way to work this morning. I have myself all worked up and feeling like it did not work. On my last cycle I got a BFN and I felt physically the same as I feel now. My boobs are no longer sore and I don't have any of the subtle pregnancy symptoms that I felt the time I was pregnant. I felt them very early on that time, tiredness, frequency of urination, etc. I feel nothing right now and it scares me. I want to think positive, but I don't know how. I don't want to set myself up for more heartache. I can;t stand this. It is so unfiar. Sorry about being such a bummer but I don't know where else to turn. -chriss

Gracielope2 · Post by **Gracielope2** » Mon Dec 17, 2007 4:08 pm

Chriss: The book is written by Joel Osteen - it's called "Your Best Life Now". What you are experiencing is tough, the not knowing is driving you crazy. Worrying and being stressed out is not going to help you, trust me. We on this forum have all been through it, that is why this forum is so special. So many special woman on the forum, going through different types of heartaches.

My boobs were hurting before transfer and then they stopped. Re said we really don't start having any symtopms. It's too soon. I don't have the frequent urnination yet, my boobs just started to feel achey. I don't feel pregnant. Chriss: Please try and not to look for things, when you feel stressed, try and take a deep breath and tell yourself, it did work.

God wouldn't put the desire in your heart, if it weren't going to come to pass.

Don't let your mind play tricks on you. I heard each pregnancy is different, what you felt in the past, may not be what you will be feeling now. Hang in there - you have one more day.

Yasmina wrote something on this forum that I loved, so I looked for it and I'm pasting it for you. I'm sure you will remember it once you read it.

Tell you all a secret here, I stopped my last cycle not just because my DH was not encouraging, it was mostly cos "I" was afraid of having twins - this would be worse than BFN to us at the moment.

I want to share something else here also w all over 40 ladies here who are feeling old each day - u in fact almost can predict which cycle will work for you. If u feel calm, confident, accepting, understanding ivf isn't the only way to become a mother, you will have your chanes even you are getting older,... when the moment comes, you can feel it, because it comes when the outcome of THAT PARTICULAR cycle won't put u in desperation, because you are already ready for the next step mentally, whatever the next step will be, such as another cycle, using DEs, or adoption, ... then this is the bfp one!
I mean everything in life works the same way, getting a job, getting a boyfriend, getting a husband, keeping friendship, keeping a job, blah, blah, blah...

I know everyone here who is trying will become a mother, you are all almost there, I just know!!!

Hant in there Chriss. It's very hard, I'm struggling myself, but we have to believe and not stress ourselves out!

chriss · Post by **chriss** » Mon Dec 17, 2007 4:48 pm

Thank you Gracie. Your words mean so much. I'm thinking of you. -chriss

summerbaby · Post by **summerbaby** » Mon Dec 17, 2007 9:23 pm

just popping in to apologize for not posting lately, although I've been reading what is going on.
chriss - thinking of you and crossing my fingers that you get your BFP on Tuesday. I hear your struggle and my heart goes out to you. wishing you lots of luck for your test.
gracie - congratulations going out to you on your BFP! A wonderful holiday gift for you and your family. please keep us posted on your progress!
sonia - thinking of you and hoping the timing of everything works out for you.
yasmina - thanks again for that yoga tip. my new dosage of medication + getting back to yoga seems to be working - I only notice because I am again able to lose weight and I have more energy.

to all the other wonderful ladies here, andrea, tammy, yasmina, jenB, catharine, luanne, anna, bigj,djb and anyone I may have missed - thinking of you and wishing you all a very happy holiday season! hope you are all looking forward to the new year as much as I am,
xx Amy

Gracielope2 · Post by **Gracielope2** » Mon Dec 17, 2007 9:53 pm

Chriss: Good Luck tomorrow. Please let us know as soon as possible. Thinking about you.....

chriss · Post by **chriss** » Tue Dec 18, 2007 6:39 pm

BFN, too depressed to write more at this time. -chriss

Gracielope2 · Post by **Gracielope2** » Tue Dec 18, 2007 7:52 pm

Chriss: So very sorry to hear about your BFN.

I know what it's like to get that call and it's heart breaking. We are here for you.

chriss · Post by **chriss** » Tue Dec 18, 2007 10:00 pm

Thanks Gracie, I'll come around. Good luck tomorrow. Please stay on this board. We (I) need your support.-chriss

Sonix · Post by **Sonix** » Tue Dec 18, 2007 10:19 pm

Chriss, I’m so sorry to read your sad news. My thoughts are with you and DH. I can imagine its especially hard with Christmas coming up. Take time to heal and don’t give up hope.

Gracie – good luck for you tomorrow.

Sonia
xxx

chriss · Post by **chriss** » Tue Dec 18, 2007 11:59 pm

Thank you Sonia. I'm getting there. It's been about 7 hours since I got the news, I am slowly emerging. I am reading a book that Gracie told me about and it is reminding me to have PMA. I know that one day it will work. Thinking of you. Good thoughts for your future.

Gracie, got the book yesterday from library and started reading it a little while ago. Thanks. It's inspiring me to think big. Thank you. Thinking of you for tomorrow. Big day, very exciting.

Thinking of you all. Thanks for being here. -chriss

DJB · Post by **DJB** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 1:10 am

Chriss - I'm just catching up on my reading. I am so sorry to hear about your news. Just wanted to let your know my heart goes out to you!!!! I'm thinking about you.

children · Post by **children** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 4:17 am

Chriss, that was some sad news which is different from what I hoped for. I definitely felt your stress yesterday and wrote a very long post, trying to see whether I could convince you to pee on an evil stick - I was thinking what if it turned out bfp? It sucks, big time, I was hoping that you and Gracie could go through the pg together. Having said that, the next cycle will come pretty soon, hope the new year will bring you new luck!

Amy and Gracie, you are welcome, that is what we are here for! Glad to have a place to talk.

All the others, due to increasing amount of work, can't stay very long here, all the best!

Yasmina

Kiwi expat · Post by **Kiwi expat** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 8:11 am

Chriss my dear - I know it sux

I'm so sorry. My thoughts go out to you and your DH.

Big hugs and take care
Andrea

chriss · Post by **chriss** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 1:12 pm

Thanks guys. Today is a new day. I closed that door and am opening the next one. Have consult appointment for the Friday after Christmas. Will be ready for next step. My DH and I will not give up. Thanks for well wishes, it means so much. Gracie, good luck today. Nice to hear form all of you. Hope all is well. -chriss

The Over 40 Crowd

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