Cycle buddies in March/April anyone?

chelly180 · Post by **chelly180** » Wed Apr 02, 2008 9:05 pm

Happy Wednesday yall!

rlk1- I will be praying for you to heal from your OHSS and for your baby!

Neffi- How are you doing? Staying positive I hope!

J&C- the extra $$ hit us hard in the wallet, but oh well, if it needs to be done to get a BFP so be it.

God Bless you all!
-michele

Neffi211 · Post by **Neffi211** » Wed Apr 02, 2008 9:41 pm

Well Ladies, My nightmare was confirmed today....Chemical Pregnancy! My beta went from 26 to 23. I dont even have any tears left to cry. Other than the extremely difficult emotions I have had the last couple of days, It is positive to think that I know I can get pregnant, and my embie got that far and implanted! After all my research, I have found that chemical pregnancies actually happen in 50-60% of first pregnancies and it is rare to ever have more than one. I feel that I will get my BFP, it just wasnt this time

It was really hard.....Sunday I was buying maternity clothes! I am devastated, but still optimistic that this is going to work for me!

Rlk1-- how are you doing mama??

Ang-- I have been having sex dreams too! I am happy that I will actually be able to have sex soon....I need a little time to get happy again, but I think this weekend will be good! I read another thread about a girl having a orgasm in her sleep and ghost said she would be fine!

suzhan · Post by **suzhan** » Wed Apr 02, 2008 9:57 pm

Oh Neffi, I'm so sad to hear this - I was truly hoping there was some other explanation. I'm so impressed with how positive your taking it all and I hope you can take the next few weeks to do something fun and focus on yourself. Take care.

- suzhan

angram · Post by **angram** » Wed Apr 02, 2008 11:52 pm

Neffi - I am so sorry to hear your sad news, I know it is incredibly devistating. Take care of yourself and we are all here for a shoulder to cry on or just a friend to talk to.

What got me through my chemical was definitely my DH's support, at least now we know I can get pregnant and since it was most likely a chromosomal abnormality issue, I'm thankful we were not faced to make a tough decision later on down the road.

I'm thinking about you and wish you the best on your next go-round. Baby Dust to you and your DH!!

J&C · Post by **J&C** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 12:17 am

angram - I've seen several other people say the exact same thing. It's normal, and it doesn't hurt the pregnancy from what I've read.

Neffi - I am so, so sorry.

I've been praying for you all day and was so hoping for that beta to double. You're absolutely right - you've gotten pregnant once, and you can definitely do it again. I'll continue to watch you on future message boards. I know your BFP is right around the corner. (((hugs)))

rlk - How are you doing? I prayed for you all day today too.

I'm doing okay. We're optimistic, but I think I'm always going to have a nagging "something could go wrong" until I actually am holding our child. I did allow myself to buy the "What to Expect When You're Expecting" book and a baby names book yesterday. I'm afraid to let myself do too much in case something happens down the road.

ann d. · Post by **ann d.** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 12:50 am

I made a major mistake and posted this on the wrong thread when I meant to post on this one. I feel so out of it right now. Anyway, this is what I posted:

Sorry... I haven't been posting lately. I don't have good news either. My beta went from 62 to 64. I am so devastated that I am crying right now as I am typing. My RE wants to do another Beta on Friday. He says there's a possibility that I lost one embie but another is still implanted. Anyway, I'm not feeling very positive right now. I can't stop crying and I'm starting to feel major cramping. I don't think this is good news. I'm sure if it doesn't happen for me this time, my time will come soon. I was so elated to hear I was pregnant 2 days ago. Never thought I would hear those words, but 48 hours later I'm horrible.

Neffi... Thanks for your reply on the other thread. Your words were encouraging. I'm glad we can understand each other's roller coaster emotions.

Angram... I had the same thing happen to me during my first IVF, but I don't think it can do anything to your implantation. Don't let it worry you. PMA!!!

RLK... Let us know how you're doing. Hang in there!!

IrishHope · Post by **IrishHope** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 2:54 pm

neffi and ann d. - I am sorry to read of your loss...it must be very difficult so allow yourself time to be sad and angry and keep the faith!! I wish there was something more I could say to make you feel better but this whole process is so hard - just know we are all here for support!!

Hi to everyone else - hope things are going well!

Nothing going on here - waiting for AF to then just schedule Day 21 bloodwork to start Lupron...all after Puerto Rico though!

angram · Post by **angram** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 8:33 pm

ann d. - I'm so sorry to hear about your beta and I'm praying that you get a much better number on Friday.

As for me, I've been waiting patiently during the 2ww...until now. I go in for my beta Monday morning and the wait is starting to get to me. My DH doesn't think we should POAS and just wait for Monday, but the last few days always seem to get to me. I still have a PMA, just getting anxious to know what's going on

Hope everyone else is hanging in there and things are gonig well.

Jeanie · Post by **Jeanie** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 9:22 pm

Hi again! Thankyou for your warm welcome. No, got a BFN last cycle and kept putting off having another one, hoping it would happen naturally. Why is it sooooooooo hard for some of us?

Having a baby is something you just expect to happen isn't it. Sounds like you ladies near the end of your cycles - I'm sending you all positve vibes! I'm on day 4 of injections and already feeling on another planet.

Angram, can I just say what a lovely thing to do at the mall and reading your post made my last IVF emotions come flooding back to me. I remember not wanting to see ANYONE I had to make an effort with, how even a visit to someone seemed like a huge unwanted ordeal. It was like a mirror image of myself then (and probably same this time) so no, you're not mad but we just need to be left alone to get through this process no one else can understand.

Now I've worked out all the lingo again, I hope to be a regular if that's ok?
Best of luck to you all x

angram · Post by **angram** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 10:21 pm

Hi Jeanie - It's great to have you here fulltime

I completely agree that having a baby should just come so naturally for us, which makes it an even harder thing to deal with. I'm sorry to hear your 1st IVF didn't work and I'm keeping my fingers crossed this is your time. The best part of the injections is that you know the ER and ET are right around the corner

Good luck!

Neffi211 · Post by **Neffi211** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 11:15 pm

hey girls--

I am having an okay day. I woke up sad...thinking that I wish I could just stay in bed. Work was forever long today. I know it may sound weird, but I feel like I'm just waiting to miscarry. I know this doesnt count as a miscarriage, but as I watched all the kids today, I couldn't help but think what if this would have stuck, what would this child have been like? Was it a boy or a girl? I am very sad, but still hopeful to at least know that I can get pregnant. Then tonight I had dinner with some girls from work and got some needed laughter!

It was an okay day, I hope time will bring healing.

Neffi211 · Post by **Neffi211** » Fri Apr 04, 2008 10:35 am

ann d- Im thinking of you today

IrishHope · Post by **IrishHope** » Fri Apr 04, 2008 12:17 pm

Jeanie - welcome! I understand not wanting to be near people - we are avoiding a brunch this wknd of all my DHs friends b/c everyone there has kids or is pregnant AGAIN...too hard to go and pretend life is great when right now it just is a rough patch. Good luck w/ this cycle...you are on your way!

ann d - thinking of you and hoping you get good news!

Neffi - you are strong! Glad you got a few laughs in at dinner! Time does help so allow yourself the time to recover...this whole thing sux and there is no reason why some of us have this struggle and others have a baby like brushing their teeth...

makes me mad for all of us! Mad but determined....we will have BFPs some day!!

suzhan · Post by **suzhan** » Fri Apr 04, 2008 4:39 pm

Well, I got the sad news but I think I expected it, not that it makes it easier, but at least it wasn't a shock.

The baby isn't growing (still measures at 6 weeks, when I should be 7 or 8 weeks.) And, the heartbeat is still slow - 115 to 119 - when it should be well over 140 by now.

So, my doctor said the baby's heart will slowly stop and then I can decide to have a natural m/c or a D&C. I go in for another ultrasound next Tuesday to confirm everything, but he says there's really no hope and this is the outcome to expect.

I'll probably take a break for a while.

Best wishes to you wonderful women. To those still waiting, may your pregnancy dreams and hopes come true very soon!

- suzhan

ann d. · Post by **ann d.** » Fri Apr 04, 2008 6:31 pm

Suzhan... I'm so sorry to hear the news. I can't imagine what you're going through right now. A break is good. Take time to enjoy your DD and DH and relax.

Well it looks like my numbers didn't double but did go up. My RE says he still wants to wait until Monday and do b/w AGAIN. If it doesn't go up dramatically by then, then I will definitely stop my meds. I'm not sure how to feel about this. I've been crying so much the past 2 days and was ready to hear the bad news today. My RE says the chances of it being a viable pregnancy are not high, but he says we've come this far, why not give it one more try Monday. He makes a good point. My mom says I can't lose hope and things happen for a reason. My DH says maybe if it doesn't happen this time, it will make us stronger and only appreciate our child even more when we do have one.

Anyway, Neffi... I re-read your post on the Dec/ Jan thread because I needed some uplifting this morning. And it helped! My favorite part is when you were saying what that man who has that rare cancer said to you, "Life is short, you cant be down about anything..... you must look at the positive or life will be gone before you know it." I have to keep thinking about that to get through this all.

Life IS too short for me to keep crying. I have a wonderful DH and fur-baby (my dog). There's so much to enjoy about life and I can't let this get me down. I thought of it like when I think about my teenage years. I loved that time of my life, but I didn't enjoy it then like I should have. There were times that I focused on the negative and the "drama". I know this is not the same thing, but it's helping me understand the importance of appreciating all the good things in my life right now.

Thank you everyone for the support you've given me. It's been really helpful! I will definitely keep you updated on what I hear Monday.