AUGUST 2008 ~ BUMP BUDDIES

[sharishu]

Marybeth and Rebecca-
I am right there with you gals regarding daycare. I know the three months' paid maternity leave will go by in a flash, and moneywise, I must work. I am thinking of doing all private therapy from home; I'd get more $ per session, hence fewer hours. Perhaps I'd get a babysitter for those hours to care for the baby in-home while I am doing the therapy. If that does not pan out, it's back to the office and daycare for the little guy. I'm sure we will be in touch to support eachother through that process, so we'll go through it together . All I know is I want my baby to have the best care, and I also want to enjoy the special moments that could never be retrieved.

Can you believe that most of us are halfway (and a bit more) through our pregnancies? After my 15 week ultrasound, the weeks started flying by. I go for my 23 week (hi-tech) ultrasound on the 14th, and can't wait! Can video clips be posted on photobucket? If so, I will try to post a clip of that u/s, perhaps with some baby bump photos. I think I look further along than I am since I am so short (4'11"). My (also short) sister also got really big in the belly during pregnancy, so I kinda figured that would happen to me too. When I walked into work yesterday, a friend of mine remarked "Wow!" when she saw my belly, and held her hands out in front of her in a 'what a big baby belly' gesture. I actually didn't mind, since I waited a long time to have this big belly and I'm darned proud of it !

Have a great weekend.
Hugs,
Shari

[tinaO]

Well, it looks like many of us are in the same boat with daycare. Ugggghhhh!!! I grew up with a stay-at-home mom who was everything to us. She was the carpool mom, homeroom mom, everything! And now as I look at what I will be - well, it just sucks sometimes! Oh well, when I changed jobs last year after 10 years at my old company, it was for this very reason. I have a lot more freedom with my job now, even if I took a major step down. Thankfully, I actually make the same amount of money and sometimes more which helps. However, since I am in Sales, I do have to travel...which you can all tell I HATE!! I know when little Noah gets here, it will make it worse and I really won't want to leave! I am only planning on taking probably 8 weeks off. Since I left my old job where I was at a much higher level in the company, I certainly gave up some outstanding benefits. Having been where I am now for only 11 months, I only get 2 weeks off at FT pay and then after that, it drops to 60% - double uggghhh!!! Thankfully, my husband graduates in July (remember he is in school FT right now) and the baby comes in August. Hopefully we will have him back at work when I am out. However, with Sales (I work for a large insurance company), most sales in this industry (approx. 75%) are made in January. Soooo.....the part that is difficult is that the busiest time is between late July - early October. Yep - right when I can no longer travel to presentations and when I am on leave!!! If you don't make your money in January, the rest of the year can be tough as you really have to live off of that money for a good portion of the year as they pay it up front to you 60 days later (in March). So, I am just so torn!!! I just can't see putting my little guy in daycare at 8 weeks!!! I think we are going to look into a nanny that can come to the house. I am able to work from home at least several days a week, so I think this could work ok. But geez - where do you begin to find a nanny??? I need to really start thinking about this, but I just dread it!! Too bad we don't all live in the same city and we could just share one...or heck...open our own daycare just for our little miracle babies! I sometimes think of little Noah as a miracle baby. I just think about how he was brought to being (ok, now I am crying) and I just am so in awe and so thankful. I know we are all so blessed to be where we are right now. We are all pregnant with healthy little babies on board. So much to be thankful for!! So, we just need to all figure out how to balance it all when we go back to work and we will be great! I am sure we will all figure it out and can support each other in the mean time.

Ok, so on a funny note.....have you seen the guy who is pregnant???? He was on the news last night and I could not stop laughing. I don't know if any of your husbands "think" they are pregnant, too....but it is the biggest joke with my husband and I. I swear he thinks he is also pregnant and keeps swearing he has some of the same symptoms I have!! Last night he told me he had heartburn and I started cracking up. Then he stepped on the scale the other day and he was over 200 pounds. My husband is tall (little over 6'0) and lean, but he has never weighed more than about 190 or 195. He looks at me with a straight face and says, "I have a baby on board". Then we both bust out laughing. Well, when this guy comes on the news last night, I start screaming for my husband to come in the room and watch it. I said, "Sweetheart - are you mad because some other man is going to deliver before you"???? Watch this!!! Anyway, there are a number of stories about it on the internet. You can check out this link for one: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jh ... ant103.xml
He is also going to be on Oprah! Guess he was a woman and then became a man but kept his ovaries. Now, he is married to a woman and they decided to get pregnant. Guess they did IVF and they will deliver via c-section? I also guess he has both sex organs??? He looks so strange! I asked my husband if he thought he was going to look like that at the end of "his" pregnancy and then I think he got pretty grossed out. My husband is a former Marine and prides himself sometimes on being a tough guy. Bet he doesn't claim he has a baby on board anymore!! Ok, hope that made you all laugh!

Shari - Good luck at your 23 week appt! That should be a cool one! Ha - and I know what you mean, the shorter we are, the bigger we look! I am only a few inches taller than you and it is like - it has nowhere to go, so it goes EVERYWHERE!!! I am glad you are feeling better. I have also had a lot of growing pains which I would assume that the smaller you are (which we both are as I am very petite), then the worse it probably is, you know?

Marybeth - Girl - I ate almost an entire pack of Tums last night!! Nothing works for me!! Oh well, I am going to try eating really simple things for a few days and smaller meals. Mine is mostly at night also. And I am pretty blessed in that my mom offered to buy the crib and changing table for us. So, I think we are going to stick with pottery barn. I found some adorable bedding ideas at the following web sites: www.bananafish.com and www.rosenberryrooms.com. Have you decided what color your boys' room is going to be??? Let us know how your 20 week appt goes!! It is so awesome when they show you everything - the fingers, toes, heart, kidneys, etc. You will love it! It is a great appt!! They did mine a little early (last week).

Rebecca - I have been wanting to try preggo yoga!!! I need to look into it. I bet it really helps to stretch everything out! I had to take a break from my walking for a week as the doctor said that might be what is aggravating my back so that it won't heal.

Ok, I better run. My e-mails at work are out of control. I need a vacation!!!

Tina

[seltzer]

OMG, that pregnant man story is BIZARRE. I am stunned he (she?) even got pregnant in the first place, given that he is jacked up on testosterone. I must say he does look like a feminine man, LOL. Believe me I support people's personal choices (I am gay and legally married to a woman after all)...but how can this person want to be a man but ALSO want to bear a child? Weird. I read an article on the Net, and this quote just cracks me up: "Beatie, who was born Tracy, said he first felt he was trapped in the wrong body when he was in his 20s. He quickly went from a Miss Teen Hawaii USA finalist to taking testosterone and growing a beard."

He went from a pageant finalist to a man to a pregnant man, LMAO. Thanks for sharing it, Tina. Sorry to hear you are feeling like such crap. I agree w/you about the daycare sitch, and I'll tell you that when my DP and I had our son I was a WRECK about not being a stay-at-home mother. but now it's OK and I don't feel the pain and anguish I once felt. My DP wants me to stay at home with the kids after this baby comes, but I don't think I'm cut out for it mentally. I need the adult interaction. Have you tried Zantac or Pepsid? Those help w/heartburn much better than Tums. Ask your OB.

Shari, glad to hear you are feeling better lately.

By the way, I do not feel ANY of this stretching pain you all talk about. Sometimes I worry things aren't right, but the OB says my size is right on track (height of uterus and all that). And I certainly feel like enough crap in other ways to forego the heartburn and ligament stretching pain...

I mentioned to you guys that I was having heart palpitations. Well I saw the cardiologist on Friday and ended up having to wear a Holter monitor for 24 hours. It was HELL! I panicked the entire time, was crying and freaking out, etc. I had a bazillion palps while wearing it. I heard from the nurse yesterday and she said the results are benign. I am having "early beats " (PVCs or premature ventricular contractions) which can happen in pregnancy because of the increased blood volume. They can also happen because of anxiety. Of course I am so anxious about it I am going to see the cardiologist again to have him explain it all to me and reassure me some more. THIS SUCKS!

OK gotta run...

Oh by the way, I LOVE the name Noah. And Shari - is your son's name going to be Eliah or Elijah? I have never heard of Eliah so I thought maybe it was a typo. I LOVE Elijah and I think Eliah is really nice too. Very handsome names!

I have my next OB appointment (23 weeks) next Tuesday. Yay!

[seltzer]

Tina - I meant to tell you I work for an insurance company (health insurance), in Sales & Marketing too. I am a data/reporting analyst. Thankfully I do not have to travel, not counting conferences and such. I thought of you today after I read your post since I was working on our monthly sales incentives compensation calculations. Do you work for a health insurance company? I really love my job...though the stress can get to me. It's a fast-paced business!

[tinaO]

Seltzer - it is a fast-paced business and yes, I work for one of the big health insurance carriers. I previously worked for a TPA, but moved over here last year...which was a good thing as the TPA I worked for was purchased by another big insurance carrier this year. My husband is an underwriter and has been for 12 years. We are often on opposite ends of the spectrum with work since Sales and Underwriting never see eye-to-eye. I sent you a PM about which company I work for right now.

And glad you thought the pregnant man was funny, too. I can't believe he was a pageant finalist! I agree about everyone having their choices and to be honest, if I could get past how weird he looked (maybe because I kept picturing my husband pregnant!!), then it might not seem as big of a deal. Oh well - to each his own I supppose! Sorry about how you have been feeling with the heart monitor deal!!! I previously had high blood pressure as I mentioned before and on top of that, was diagnosed with mitral valve prolapse a few years ago. I always get freaked out about feeling weird things with my heart. It is just something you don't want to mess with, you know? I also go to a Cardiologist just to be safe. My dad was a cardio surgeon, so I suppose I feel better going to a cardiologist than anyone else when it comes to stuff like this.

Well ladies, Mr. Noah is ON THE MOVE these days!!! I feel him moving all day long now which is so weird! I love it! When I tell my husband things about my day, I always mention that "Noah and I did this or that". Earlier I told him I pulled a Britney Spears while he was in class tonight. He said, "You showed the world your....(well, you know what kind of word he used)"???? I said, "No, Noah and I went for a drive because we were bored and went to get a drink at Sonic." Only the papparazi didn't follow us which was kind of disappointing! Guess I am not a celebrity after all. Maybe if I can get my husband pregnant, I too can go on Oprah!!!!

[2ndtimer]

Hi Guys,
Well get this, I also work for a health insurance company. I'm a nurse case manager. I get to work at home & manage people over the phone. It is so much better than working in a hospital, let me tell you. I'm not sure how pregnant hospital nurses even cope with things -being on your feet all day, lifting people, exposure to everything.
The daycare was very, very nice & I went ahead and put in a deposit. The whole place was clean & cheerful looking. The teachers were very presentable & the class sizes very small. It's also within walking distance of my home, so I can be there at a moments notice. There's no way I can do my job & watch the baby at the same time(also if my company found out I was trying to do that I could get fired & most definitely brought back into the office) Our plan is that I will start working around 7am, DH will take baby to daycare around 9am when he leaves for work, then I should be able to go get baby around 4pm. So baby shouldn't have to stay there for that long of a day. DH has some coworkers who went the nanny route instead of daycare & apparently it's about the same cost. I have no idea how to find a nanny, but there has to be a way. Maybe check out some local online mommy groups?

I saw the pregnant man on Oprah yesterday. I have to admit that my first gut reaction was "gross". But I guess I'm thinking about my DH being pregnant -god forbid. I love him to death, but he's my big baby boy. He's a big macho looking guy, but he falls apart with a little scratch or a bruise, or a tummy ache. When one of my friends found out we were trying IVF to get pregnant she said "Are you sure you want to do that? I mean you already have one big baby to take care of" True, but despite that he is a really good dad to his daughter & is really, really excited about the baby.

To those of you with the indigestion/heartburn problems -zantac is included in my safe OTC meds list. The generic name is ranitidine. I haven't been taking that yet, but if my night time heartburn gets worse I think I will. I don't like to take a lot of meds, but I don't believe in suffering if there's something safe to take.

I got some ligament pain yesterday for the first time. Very Ouchy! And I also seemed to have some pubic bone pain. I think I overdid it this week. I was doing a lot of yard work that I probably shouldn't have been. I took a nice warm bath & feeling better today.
The nesting instinct has kicked in big time. I'm wanting to go ahead & paint the nursery now and get my baby furniture set up.
Hope everyone has a good weekend.
Take care,
Rebecca

[MBG]

Hello ladies! Our appointment today went very well! We are still having two boys....clear as day! They were both pretty squirmy during the u/s, but the tech was able to get all of her measurements....both boys look GREAT!! Everything is in place and where it should be!! This of course made us both very happy!!

We have started to paint the nursery..I chose a green color, prior to finding out the sex....I thought it was a good gender neutral color and I really like green!! Anyway, as we have started to work on the nursey we have been coming up with all of this different stuff we can do to make it better....we just went out today and picked out some new carpet! We just want it to be really nice for the boys!! Anyway, the new book shelves are done, and we have one coat of paint on the walls. We should be finished painting this weekend, and the carpet should be able to be installed next week! Very exciting! I cannot wait to start filling it up!!!

Dh and I are going back and forth on names....I currently I like Sullivan and Gray....middle names still undecided....want to incorporate family names for the middle names...who knows what we will actually end up with!!

Belly rubs to all!!

Marybeth

[MBG]

Hello again..I forgot to mention in my last post...I went to the dentist earlier this week. He was telling me about all of the issues pregnant women can have with their teeth..most importantly gingivitis! He said to make sure to floss 2 times a day....at night for about 10 minutes...I don't know about you girls, but I will be flossing regularly for the remainder of this pregnancy!!

Happy tooth care!

marybeth

[tryw8]

Hi Ladies:

I know haven't posted much since finding out that our preliminary amnio report was good.

Last week (Week 20), I returned one more time to the specialist office. We got a bonus of more ultrasound and 3D images were taken (placed on a CD so I can print up later). He was looking for the "stomach bubble". He wanted to make sure that baby was swallowing and that the mouth, throat and stomach are all connected. The baby was a bit shy. Kept covering it's face with one hand and then started to play peek-a-boo! DH and I were laughing so hard. What a relief! I can finally enjoy your pregnancy." What a small island this is. My specialiast is the nephew of the other hygienist I work with. Imagine that. Her nehpew is the second son of her oldest sister and that they are the same age.

Anyways, DH is still having a thrill of telling his coworkers and friends about our good news.

He enjoys it when he can accompany me to my weekly appointments. They have to make bigger stalls for us expectant mothers. Sometimes I sit in the car killing time before my appointment and I observe these other women trying to squeeze out or inside of the car because the car next to them parked really close to their side. Just think, I'm not too much far behind. Not changing the subject, last month, mother-in-law took us shopping at the PX and commisary. DH and I were sharing a private giggle (we hadn't told anyone yet) when we saw stalls not only marked for the high ranking officers but there those strategically marked "expectant mothers". I kid you not!

Had a rough day at the beginning of the week. I went over my parents house to drop something off for mom. Mom had said something that I didn't give her instructions to do. My parents have a talent of half hearing what I say or not hearing it at all and just doing what they want. It's sad that my father had changed his words and stood behind my mom rationalizing and covering for her Ooops!

Anyways, there was all out war exchange of fighting words. My mom had commented to my dad while I was there, "See I told you that she would react this way." Then if they know how I am, why the hell bring it up. They didn't need to tell me the kind of stuff that was said. My mom had the nerve to say to me that I'm carry a child and to watch my anger because anything can happen to my baby. My exact words were, "And it WILL be YOUR fault." I walked out and slammed the door behind me.

Damn!

DH is all mad. He said how dare my parents throw a monkey wrench into our happiness especially since they know of what kind of delicate condition I'm in. I have only one other sibling. It's my younger brother. I can tell you, it's sucks when parents favor one over the other. (I am NOT the favorite.) What my parents do to me, it's a gift (sarcasm).

DH and I are a bit worried, I haven't felt any movement from my baby since before I got into that fight w/ my parents. Well, DH and I have a weekly appointment to see the OB/GYN this morning. I hope everything is okay.

Currently, I'm just avoiding my parents. I haven't called or seen them since. The house phone has been ringing and so has my cellphone. I/We just allow the answering machine or voicemail to pick up. No messages left. I won't hold my breath on getting an apology either.

Life is just ... is. We're doing just fine, DH and I.

marybeth: I'm glad you got a chance to go to the dentist. It is quite important neglect ones teeth at this wonderful time of our lives.

As a dental hygienist, I can tell you of all the horrified situations I've seen in the dental chair from gingivitis to "pregnancy tumors" to rampant incipient and reccurrent cavities that I've seen happen post delivery.

I agree, that good oral hygiene and home care is a must during this time.

I pray that everything is going well for everyone else.

Karen

[tinaO]

Hello all! Well, San Antonio is hopping this weekend with the Final Four Basketball tournament in town this weekend - crazy! We officially bought Noah's bedding yesterday and I am so excited!!! I don't know if any of you have ever heard of Caden Lane, but I keep seeing it on the internet during my searches and thought it was gorgeous! I had no idea until yesterday when we went to this store here that she was based here in San Antonio. Anyway, her bedding and accesssories are beautiful and we kind of accidentally walked into her store. She decorates for many of the celebrities, including Tori Spelling, Samantha Harris from Dancing with the Stars, the couple who met on the Biggest Loser and got married (Suzy and Matt, I think?)...anyway, love her stuff! It is expensive, but not ridiculously so. The link to the bedding I bought which coincidentally is the "Noah" beeding is http://www.cadenlane.com/bedding_blue if you want to check it out. Too cute! We are putting ours in a very dark wood crib though. She has accessories to match and awesome pictures to match the bedding there. We are set!

Ok, you ladies have convinced me I need to go to the dentist! My gums have been swollen and I can't jack around with this, so I will make an appt on Monday!

We are off to hopefully buy the crib today and then hopefully start painting!

Marybeth - I love the names Sullivan and Gray - very cute and yet handsome! Love the names!!! I am glad they are perfectly healthy and happy!

Karen - Your story hits home, girl! I just had what amounts to just another falling out with my brother last weekend. My brother is a selfish jerk who really prefers to take care of only himself and his family and screw everyone else. Well, my mom is handicapped (she has had Multiple Sclerosis since I was about 15) and yet my brother prefers to leave all of that responsibility to my husband and I and just not deal with it. Thankfully I have a wonderful husband who does help me immensely with my mom! Well, my brother pulled one of his typical stunts last Sunday and it ended up with a big family discussion between my brother, my husband and I at my mom's place. Well, I was very proud of my husband as he stood up to my brother and said, "My wife is pregnant right now and she isn't feeling well (this is when I was so sick last weekend) and I do not want this to happen again in the future. We understand it is our responsibility to take care of your mother and we are fine with that, but if that is the case, then you need to setp out and let us handle things. What I want to know is, what can we do in the future to avoid this kind of situation so that my wife doesn't have to be upset and crying, esp at a time like this in our lives"? I was so proud of my husband as my brother always pushes me around and is so sooo selfish. He uses his kids as his crutch as to why he can't ever do one damn thing to help my mom and yet I am always supposed to handle it all. His wife is no better. She is very jealous of me and believe it or not - has not even called to congratulate us on having a boy. They have 3 boys and I know she was secretly happy we were having one since she didn't want me to steal the show and have a girl. Whatever! Family crap just sucks!! I am sure your mom regrets what she said and that is who is calling. People just sometimes say things they don't mean. I hate it! But you know, they do need to be worried about you and provide you with all the love and support you need right now. Do not worry for a second about not feeling movement since - they say it is very normal right now!! I just read an article that said you can easily go a few days or more at this point without feeling anything and not to stress about it. Hang in there and know we are all here for you!! I am glad to hear your baby is healthy and great though and the 3D images sound so cool!


Ok, I am off to shop!

[sharishu]

Hello Ladies,
I'm up here in the middle of the night enjoying my latest episode of insomnia . Hope everyone is well today. My heartburn has gotten much better, and no major morning sickness the past few days, so, PHEW!

Seltzer- How are you feeling? I remember you saying that you were one big 'hurt unit'. I understand that completely- hurting in every sense of the word. I had very bad ligament stretching pain last week, and the physical pain really affected me emotionally as well. I cried at EVERY little thing for 2 days straight, but I am much better now TG. I hope you are feeling better as well. Also, you asked about the name 'Eliah'. It is actually the hebrew version of Elijah, and it's pronounced /Eh-lee-YAH/. It's the one name that me and dh both really like.

Tina- So sorry to hear of your family stress. It's great that you have a supportive, strong husband to stand up for you and be your rock, especially when you are pregnant and feeling sick. I hope your mom is feeling well, considering her condition.

Marybeth- Congrats on your latest u/s! Sounds like the little guys are doing great . How exciting, getting the room ready for them. Have fun decorating! As far as we are concerned, we are set to move to a new apartment about the time that I'm supposed to deliver, so we'll have to wing it! My mom is coming around that time to help out which I am sooo thankful for. I guess we'll get things together AFTER our little man arrives .

Have a great week everyone.
Hugs,
Shari

[tryw8]

Hi tina:

Thank you for your kind words. I'm sorry to also to hear about your family turmoil. Distress, it's not what I want but it always follows me when it comes to my family. I always have a short-lived moment of happiness then my parents have a gift of throwing a curve ball into the situation.

To this day, I haven't heard from them. I haven't made any attempts either. I never imagined that there would be a division in my immediate family. DH said, this is what happens when parents favor one sibling. I've really been cursed. I guess I better get used to being shut out by my own parents.

YIKES!!! I had my weekly visit to the OB/GYN, I put on four pounds since FET in November.

ARGH!!! Two more weeks of daily 2cc PIO shots.

Karen

[sharishu]

Rebecca,
How are you? I was just rereading your post about your ligament + pubic bone pain. Hope all is well with you.
Shari

[sharishu]

Rebecca,
How are you? I was just rereading your post about your ligament + pubic bone pain. Hope all is well with you.
Shari

[2ndtimer]

Hi Shari,
I am doing much better now thanks. I think last week I overdid things. First I went to prenatal yoga, which was just fine. But the next day I was out in the yard, gathering up brush & fallen branches and probably lifting too much. By Thursday evening I had that pain that was really, really bothering me. It also worried me because I think I've been pretty lucky so far in this pregnancy & I was scared that I'd be hurting from here on out. I mean, it was really painful Thursday night. Fortunately, after taking it easy on Friday & most of Saturday I started feeling much better. It still bothers me at night. It's like a pain that shoots up from my pubic bone that I notice when I get up from sitting.
I like the name you've chosen! We need to get on the ball with that -DH & I are having a hard time agreeing on a name. Sorry you've got insomnia. I had that really bad during my last FET cycle & then it lasted for about a month afterwards. I just couldn't sleep at all. One day during work I was on the phone with a coworker & just fell apart crying -just from the exhaustion. Now I wake up several times a night to pee but thankfully have been able to fall back asleep.

Tina & Karen, sorry to hear about your family stresses. Remember, you are starting your own families now, so time to focus on your own especially when others are stressing us out. Karen, did you say you've gained 4 lbs since the FET? And you're worried about it??? I'd say congratulations. I've gained over 10lbs & counting.

Hope everyone else is well.
Rebecca