Heart’s Desire – Finding Strength and Direction from God

[kbat]

I am going to stay w/ tcm. I would love to try one or two more ivf's but 2 things are stopping me.... The main thing is the cost. I was extremely lucky to have 6 IVF treatments paid by my insurance at 100%--the only exception is a $20 co-pay (was $15 until last July) and my co-pays for meds (co-pay for various drugs was 10/25/40) so most of the time I only had to pay about $250--maybe less--depending on the meds. But now that I've hit my limit, I would have to pay 100% out of pocket and just don't have that sort of money to pay for all this. I think it would stress me out if I had to figure out a way to pay for this. Also, I wasn't too happy w/ either clinic in Rhode Island, so to try to find another clinic and go through all the testing again (at my expense) just doesn't appeal to me at all.

My husband isn't really for adoption. He's a lawyer and was involved w/ some wrongful adoption cases, so he's seen the bad side of adoption and how it works. Also, you raise them and you're the parents but now a days, a lot of them want to go find the biological parent(s), so you always wonder about that aspect I suppose. We have also decided against donor eggs. If we ever had biological kids they would have to be "both" of our kids biologically--not just one of ours. It just comes down to personal preferences.

I know this whole process is stressful, and I don't seem to get discouraged, but sometimes I do find it hard to "let go." I do pray about it, and I do understand that God has a plan for me, but sometimes it's hard to see/realize. That's why I am not totally giving up yet. So, I will continue to give the tcm a try and keep my fingers crossed that it's God's will that it works out.

Talk to you all later.

[Hope644]

Hi sisters -

I'm sorry I've been away. I've missed you guys, but I've just had a tough wknd. I'm NOT COMPLAINING - I'm just explaining where I've been...

I haven't had a chance to read up on the board and see what everyone is up to, so I'm sorry that I haven't updated the prayer list. If any of you want to, you can, just quote the last one, edit and delete the "quote stuff from the beginning and the end. I'm really sorry... I just don't have it in me right now.

I'm still praying for you all and will continue to do so. I will catch up when I can.

I did catch that Nikki had all four snowbabies transferred! How fantastic! Praying for implantation, sweetie. You take it easy.

Sonu - praying you will see a strong heartbeat tomorrow. You will have already completed yours by the time I have mine (09:30 EST) - so you set the stage with some good news!!

Hugs and love to you all.

[nicaliw]

Hope thanks for your kind thoughtsand prayers.

I will pray for a healthy heartbeat on your upcoming US.

Hugs

Nikki

[sonu911]

Hope ~ Thanks a lot, dear for your prayers. I am hoping to hear one healthy heartbeat today:) I will update you guys as soon as possible.

Nikki ~ You are in my prayers, embabies would have stuck to your tummy by now or will do it in a day or two. Can't wait to see one more BFP on our list.

Kbat ~ Though I cannot do much to ease your mind but just can say that you are in my thoughts.

Hugs and prayers for all.

[sonu911]

Our Heart's Desire PRAISE and PRAYERS....

Psalm 7:17 I will give thanks to the LORD because of his righteousness and will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High.


MP/Mia- Praise to God for a BFP on 2/14/08!! Beta #1 = 316 and Beta #2 = 960!! First U/S scheduled for 2/25/08 Praise to the Lord, she saw the little one fluttering around in there! 2nd U/S 3/6/08! Still growing strong!! Praying that she soon finds her lost apetite and have nice time vacationing with her DH and family.

Kildean - Praise to God for a BFP!! Beta #1 = 1255! First U/S = 2/29/08!

Princess - Praise for BFP on 1/18!! Prayers for continued growth and development into a beautiful, healthy baby!!

Hope - Praise to the Lord for a BFP (3/25)!! 1st beta = 1700, 2nd beta = 3,954, 3rd beta = 9,156. First U/S Wed 4/9

sonu911 - Praise for a BFP on 4/11/08 !!! 1st beta = 150!! Praise for health and steady growth of the little one in her womb. Next U/S on 4/21.

Lord, you already know every hair on Mia's, Kildean's, Princess', Hope's, Apdean's and Sonu's little ones heads. We pray that you continue to grow and develop them in their mothers wombs and they go on to deliver beautiful and healthy bundles of joy which they will teach your ways, O Lord.

Weezie - Prayers for you sweetie... Praying God continues to bless and keep you. Please let us know how you are

Angela - Prayers for you as well. Praying God keeps His mighty hand over you. Please send us an update.

Nikki - Praise 4 safe and healthy embabies transferred on 4/18. Prayers for sticky embabies and strong BFP beta on 4/27. Prayers for encouragement and strength from the Lord!! And prayers for the Lord's will and guidance in the foster care/adoption process! Praise for healing!


Indie - Prayers for the upcoming IVF cycle. Praise for oneness of mind with DH and good results on the inital testing! Prayers for smooth sailing in the IVF study cycle, much patience and safe travel with to the clinic.

Chelly - Prayer for comfort and encouragement through the IVF process (update??!) Praying for you, dear. Please update us.

Cathann - Praying your surgery went well and had a safe and fruitful ER/ET. Update us!!

Chriss - Prayers for strength renewed as you continue your TTC journey with the new clinic. Praise that all went well with the hysterocopy on Wed 4/2. Prayers for a new outlook and plan of action with the new RE and for safe travels to and from their office. Praise for successful mock transfers with the new RE.


Paulina - Prayers for encouragement from the Lord, that He will hear her cries and show her His love and for strength and healing after the failed cycle.


Edel - Prayers for healing and strength after chemical pg and for a safe and healthy FET next month? Thinking of you, dear... please update us. Praying for you.


hrobinson - Prayers for healing and good results from the test. Praise for the upcoming FET cycle! Prayers for a safe thaw for her little embabies!! Praise for the excellent test scores of her students!! Praise for the peace of mind of her student and her family who lost his father in an accident. May God rest his soul in peace.

kbat/Kara - Prayers for healing and strength with TCM. She trusts in Your will, Father, help her through this difficult time and show her the wonderful plans that you have set for her - wherever they take her.

Iccin - Prayers for you and your most recent cycle. Please let us know how you are doing. Results from your blood test? Praying that your hpts were wrong. If not, Father, please bring comfort and peace to Iccin and help her to grieve but encourage her with your plans for the future.

Leigh28 - Prayers for encouragment and peace as well as guidance and direction for the future. Prayers for health and a fruitful FET in May or June.

Thank you, Lord, for the many blessings you have given us. Thank you for each and every person on this list. Please bless us and help us to know your will for our lives and Lord, to seek your will in all we do. Thank you God, for the blessing we have been to each other in this short time together. Please bless our friendships as we honor You! And help us, Father, to encourage and support one another through joy and laughter as well as through sorrow and tears. Teach us Lord, to love one another and others as You love us.

Draw us nearer to You, Lord, as we go through this process. Lord, whatever the path you have chosen for us, show us the way You want us to go. Grant us peace and comfort in your loving arms, Father Abba. Help us to know how our struggles and our suffering are important to you and how you long for us to grow through them and lean on You. Help us to know how to pray and for what to pray. Convict us in the areas of our lives that need correction and guide us back to the paths of fulfillment, sanctification, and righteousness.

In the Name of Your Precious Son, Jesus, Amen.

[Hope644]

Thanks Nikki & Sonu

you all are the best!!!

And - SONU!! Thank you so much for updating the prayer list... I was feeling a little better and was signing back on and going to see if I could do it, but I haven't read everyone's updates, so I'm behind...

Thank you SO much for doing it - tho, I feel bad, you had to update it for your own BFP!

Anyway, can't wait to hear the great news after your U/S today!!!! (well, tomorrow for me, today for you! - it's only 10pm here!)

hugs & prayers to all

[Smita]

Sonu,
Waiting for news of your U/S..
Love,
smita

[Angel505]

Sonu,

Just wanted to wish you good luck for your ultrasound today. Hope it all goes well. Let us know how it goes.

Ang

[sonu911]

Dear Hope, Smita and Angel

My 6mm little angel is overwhelmed and is fluttering and saying thanks to all you wonderful people out there. I can't thankyou all enough for praying for my little beanie. Did I forget to tell that YOU GUYS SIMPLY ROCK!!!
and GOD IS ALWAYS SO GREAT!!!

So, the doc saw one gestational sac and he said, ''till now there is only one sac visible.'' The sac measured 6mm and I am 5 weeks 2 days pregnant. Now I am scheduled to meet doc in 2 weeks for another u/s and probably then I will get to hear heartbeat. I am soooo happy. Oh!! yes, I got the first pic of my little angel.

Hope ~ The stage is set... waiting to hear about your u/s report.

Hugs to all.

[hrobinson]

Sonu- So happy that US went well. It is amazing to see your little one growing.

Hope- Praying for you with your US. Can't wait to get your news:)

I hope everyone has a great Monday.

[nicaliw]

Sonu...thanks for updating the list and CONGRATULATIONS on you wonderful US news. It must be so exciting seeing that little heart beating away. I'm so happy for you.

Hope...thinking of you, can't wait to hear how it went for you.

[IndieBlue]

Congrats Sonu So happy you got to see your little one. AF is cramping me up today so I'll be seeing her either later today or tomorrow....probably the latter since I have 4 different appointments tomorrow for the kids, nothing like having to run all around town and dealing with AF LOL

My mom is actually in town today, so we're going to lunch with her. That's only making AF cramps worse LOL She didn't raise me, so it's awkward when we visit. Normally hubby is with me, but today he has to work and doesn't know if he'll be able to break for lunch then Anyhow, it'll be one lunch and then I'll say I need to get home for the little ones naps....so 2-3 hours of being uncomfortable and then back home LOL PMA!!!

Today I got a call back from the Psychologist and he said that 1 visit would be fine and the only way that it would be more than 300.00 is if I had some kind of odd circumstance. The nurse asked him what an 'odd circumstance' would be and he said, ummm, if she was a man once and is now a woman. Things like that~ Okay...well I think I'm safe then

They are mailing out the paperwork today so we can fill it out and that way our appointment will only be 2 hours that day. Again, PMA....2 hours and 300.00 and we'll be that much closer to our cycle

Thank you ladies again for the prayers.

[Hope644]

Sonu - Such fantastic news!!!! YAY!!!!!! I'm so happy for you!

Good news about AF & the cost of Psychologist, Indie - you're getting closer every day!!

Hope everyone else is doing well.... I still need to catch up, but I can't do it now... got to get some food (keep it down) and get to work.

I just got back from our appt - I made DH drive me, in case it was bad news, I didn't want to have to drive myself after. BUT, it was good news - and it was still nice to share the ride back with him!

Our little one is growing well and measuring 1.71 cm and has a heart rate of 176. Though we're still not out of the woods (of course) we are sitting much more comfortably - as we've now made it past the stage where we lost our last little one. Praise to God for His goodness and mercy.

Thanks to all of you for your support and prayers... continuing to pray for each of you - praying that we will all be richly blessed.

I will post baby's pic later, gotta get it scanned in.

[nicaliw]

Oh praise God, Hope, I am so happy for you......looking forward to seeing the picture of the little person inside you.

[hrobinson]

YEA!!! Such wonderful things happening on our board lately....Nici having all 4 survive the thaw, Indie's dh getting an unexpected raise on his check, and being able to do her psych eval close and for cheaper than anticipated, Hope getting wonderful news and Sonu seeing her little one. Oh girls, it just gives me so much joy to read all these wonderful things.

I know God has wonderful things in store for each and every one of us. We just need to keep believing. He provides when we least expect it.

Praise God!!!