Heart’s Desire – Finding Strength and Direction from God

[IndieBlue]

Still thinking and praying for you Sonu!

Nicaliw: Thanks for the clarification on the meds. While I'm trying to stay positive with the thoughts that I have done this before (egg donation) and so I know I'll respond...and I do have 2 bio children so again, I know my body can do this, I still just keep thinking 2 things. 1) I'm older, by 12 years....that makes a difference as well as my weight. 2) It's still so unknown, while most RE's have a pretty decent success rate 40%, it's still less than 1/2 and some women are picture perfect, textbook cycles.....still with BFN's It's just such a hard thing to think about....which I know all of you understand, so that makes it easier to share.

HRobinson: Well, 2nd day and no sickness And funny enough...no cramps!!! But I'm bleeding heavier, woke up this morning and it was everywhere. Sorry, TMI LOL Wonder if it's got some sort of thinner in it, hence the heavier flow and the missing cramps. I've noticed over the years that cramps are often associated with clots for me...so again, maybe it has something in it? That'll be neat that we'll be so close in ER and ET! We can do our 2ww together.

Nicaliw: Still feeling okay?

Hope: How are you?

Kbat: Any prayer request or updates?

Well, today was the last day to sort of finish up some stuff with homeschooling Last week was the official last day that the state requires, but we did an extra week to finalize some things. So now I can concentrate on having fun...and getting through this cycle My nurse did tell me to wear LOTS of sunblock with the doxycycline as you'll burn...so that was a downer, we just opened our pool LOL But I guess since I slather the sunblock on the kids, I can use the 50spf on me too

I'm eager to hear updates from you all! Keep in touch
Faith

[chriss]

Hi Indie,

Glad you are on your way. Did the nurse say any more about sunburn? What is it that makes women sensitive to the sun? Is the the stimms? I am curious as no one really ever mentioned this to me, I think.

Thinking of you sonu.

-chriss

[Hope644]

Well, tentative dates look like this:

Lupron starting on the 15th of May
Stims starting on the 25th-31st of May
Retrieval on June the 2nd
Transfer on June the 7th
So yes...looking for a February or March baby(s)

She faxed in my meds order today but when I called about them they had no record of them. I had to call her back and by then she was gone for the day....yay So I left a message and I guess she'll do that tomorrow and I'll get those before I need them.

On a side note...when did you gals take your BCP's? I've never taken them....but I'm on prescription Repliva (Iron) and thought maybe I needed to take them at another time so I wouldn't double whammy myself and make myself sick. Iron makes me just a tad (tiniest bit) nauseous....but some BCP's have that effect on people and as I said I wouldn't want a double dose Is it okay to take them first thing in the morning?

I'm trying to catch up - so forgive me for doing individual posts, but I want to be sure I respond to everything

Indie - first of all, CONGRATULATIONS on getting some dates going AND AF showing up AND reasonable price on meds!!! WOO HOO!!! And Feb/Mar are great months for babies!! (My DH is Feb and I'm a March - so what else would i say?! )

About the BCPS - I had a very strong reaction (nausea) to the BCPs and my RE recommended taking them at night. She said, while you still get nauseated, you're sleeping and less likely to notice. It worked for me. I had little to no problems when I did that. I also take my prenatal vitamin at night - I've read they can cause nausea, but they also absorb better without the meals during the day.

I'm so happy for you! Things are really working together! God is so good!

[Hope644]

I just can't help but keep wondering if this pregnancy will turn out the same as the last one. I know the chances are good that this one will be fine but its so hard to keep a hold of the PMA. I wonder if I'll be sitting here for 5 months again waiting for another cycle.....just like last time. That would be so hard. Anyway, should try to stay positive. Everything is fine, no bleeding or cramping and my betas are strong. Just need to keep praying.

Sweetie, I know exactly how you feel. I've been going through this same thing myself. While part of me thinks, well, it's not likely to happen again - the other part (probably devil influence) thinks - well, it happened before, it's just as likely to happen again... Keeping PMA strong is a struggle, especially after m/c.

But you are right - no bleeding, no cramping and great betas!!! I'm praying for you and know that God is taking good care of you and your little one(s) They are growing so fast in there and waiting for your U/S so they can blink their little hearts and show you how well they are doing!!! Hugs, sweetie!!

[Hope644]

Indie- I take my BCP every morning. I have never had any problem with sickness...though I too have heard that some do. Looks like we will be (fingers crossed) pregnant about the same time. They are going to do the transfer sometime between June 4 - 9. YEA!!! It is always so exciting to have dates to look forward to. And they will fly by.

I will be headed to the funeral this afternoon....Mia, I will be in your neck of the woods:)
DH is doing really well. I am probably more upset than he is. Go figure.

hrobinson - Wow! We need to update the prayer list with more good news about your transfer too! I'll try to get that done this weekend. You're right, it will be here before you know it.

Praying for you, Dh and the family during this time, funerals are never easy - and for the family, the hard part often comes after, when all the people and obligations are gone. Praying for peace and comfort, especially in the upcoming weeks. <<<HUGS>>>>>[

[Hope644]

Hey there - back to a "normal" post -

Chriss - I know you didn't ask me about the sun sensitivity, but since I'm on here, it's the doxycyline (antibiotic) that makes you sensitive, just that drug in particular, i've never heard of the stimming drugs making you sensitive to sun. Anyway. How are you doing sweetie? You've been such an inspriation to me with your therapy - I have been thinking about you a lot today... thank you for being so open with everyone on the threads about your therapy - I think it is positive and could inspire others to seek help when they might otherwise avoid it. I know it has inspired me. Thank you! And - I hope all is going well with the new RE!!

Mia - Has DH left for Moldova yet? Wow, three weeks away from him. Have you guys ever been apart for so long before? I've never been away from my DH for more than - hmm, a week? Well, at least you have your papers to grade to keep you warm (Remember that old Foghorn Leghorn cartoon ?? - "At least I've got my bandages to keep me warm!" - you probably think I'm nuts) How's the little momma doing?? Gaining any weight yet? All set for the big flight in a few weeks? I guess there's no concern with travel this early in the game, eh?

Sonu - Thinking of and praying for you, sweetie. I know you're resting, but please let us know how you're doing when you can.

kildean, apdean - how you guys? Haven't heard much from you lately!

Kbat - how's the TCM and natural ttc? Hope all is going well. Thinking of you sweetie!

I have a big prayer request girls - My grandmother (fondly known as Sassy) was admitted into the hospital today. She has always been such a trooper and inspiration in my life. She fell back in Dec and broke her hip. She has recovered nicely, but now is having problems with her other hip (which is actually stimming from her spine - sciatia) and apparently stopped eating and drinking - but still taking pain meds which caused her to have acute kidney failure today. They had to do emergency chemical dialysis which seemed to get things going better. Her BP was 60/29 but her pulse was 133. That improved after the first bag and she actually was hungry and ate some. But now she is having problems with diarhea (12 BMs in 3 hrs ) and her BP has dropped again. They are a 5 hr drive from me and Dh has to work and can't take me down there until Monday. I know she has a lot of fight in her, but I also know she is very scared. My sister overheard her praying outloud that God would take away her pain. I hope that she hasn't given up and pray that God will restore her health and give her the will to fight. Please pray for her and for my mother, who is feeling extremely guilty that she gave her too much pain med - but she didn't give her more than was prescribed... and Sassy was at the reg doctor on Wed - if she was so dehydrated then, I feel like they should have known - or at least if they didnt' know, my mom shouldn't feel guilty for not knowing - she's not a medical professional, after all. Thank you all for your prayers. I am so grateful to each of you.

On a happier note, I had my first OB appt today. Baby is measuring 9w5d, so a bit ahead of schedule (we're at 9w2d) - which I'm attributing to my 6'3" tall husband - though, who knows, right?

[IndieBlue]

Hi Indie,

Glad you are on your way. Did the nurse say any more about sunburn? What is it that makes women sensitive to the sun? Is the the stimms? I am curious as no one really ever mentioned this to me, I think.

Thinking of you sonu.

-chriss

It's the doxycycline (antibiotic) that makes you sensitive to the sun I will begin taking it on the 15th and I think it goes for 20 days, then I have a few after ER too.

[IndieBlue]

Hope: Sorry about your grandmother! I will definitely pray for her. Glad that the baby is growing and ahead of schedule! But then again....since husband is tall...you're right, little baby will probably be measuring ahead of schedule the whole time and be just like hubby!

I get what you all are saying about the doubts. As I've said before....I know that carrying a child is possible, my body has done it before. And I know that my husband and I are compatible LOL....but it was also 12 years ago and IVF isn't quite a perfected science yet, even perfect text book cycles end in BFN's I am trying to stay positive but at the same time realize that God is in control and he may not want me to have another one right now.....or ever

Thanks for the pitch for February and March LOL I have a June birthday and hubby's is in April. Then we have a June, September, October, November, and December....so a spring birthday will be nice for us.

The BCP's have only had a slight effect on me so far....just a little nauseated today, and had a headache....but I took a 20 minute nap and felt better I do take my prenatal at night though, along with my iron supplement.

I found these prenatals online called Promise prenatals, they are for the different stages/trimesters and the ones for before you're pregnant are supposed to have a different kind of Iron and lower B6 I think? Supposed to cut down on nausea. If these OneADay ones start making me sick....I'll try the Promise ones. They'll do a retest on me on the 22nd to see if I still need the extra Iron supplement too....it's running 40 a month just for those!

Well, time for bed! Wow, it's 10o'clock....I'm really living wild tonight LOL

So nice to see everyone posting again! And I'm so happy to hear about your U/S Hope! I'm eager to hear from the Dean sisters too.....where did they go

[Hope644]

Thanks for your prayers, Indie. Sassy got worse, but then improved over night. She is now in ICU - which is good, better care, but they had to give her a blood transfusion overnight. It helped her BP - now up to 119/53. All my sisters and mom stayed in the waiting room overnight. I feel badly - I slept like a baby in my own bed. They, of course, don't mind - they know I'm here and probably wouldn't have let me stay being PG anyway.

But I think I'm going to go down there today. I didn't want to drive, but I just want to be there. I am trusting that God is in control and that he is healing her body, but you know, it's just hard not to be with your family when something like this happens. DH can't drive me until Monday, but I think I'm going to head down today.

Glad to hear the BCPs aren't doing too much of a number on you. Let us know about the new prenatals!! And you keep that PMA!!! You are right, God is in control, but He knows you and wants to give you the desires of your heart. He knows what a wonderful mother you are and what a blessing not only to you, but to his creation to bless him/her with a wonderful mother - that is one of the most amazing blessings any child can receive. Keep your focus on Him and stay positive!!! All is going to be well - he has already made so many paths clear for you in this process; He will continue to bless you!

If I'm not around for a few days, i'll most likely be in NC. I will try to log on sometime just to let you know how Sassy is doing. Thank you all, again, for your continued prayers.

[nicaliw]

Hope, I do hope your grandmother Sassy is doing better. Poor thing.
And thankyou for your message, you always say the nicest things and know exactly the right thing to say.

[chriss]

Hope,
My thoughts and prayers are with you, your family and Grandma Sassy.
Thanks for your messages. THey always mean so much.
-chriss

[Smita]

Crashing this thread again top send loads of good wishes and positive thoughts to Sonu.
I hope all stays well with you sweetie.I have been on holiday, so i didnt know your news- i can imagine how scared you feel. May God keep you and your little one safe.
Hugs,
smita

[kbat]

sorry I haven't posted. I'll know soon if the tcm has helped me this cycle or not. Still doing the acupuncture/"herb pills" and my dh and I did what we needed to do on ovulation day. Day 28 is Wed for me. I am usually pretty regular, however, the last couple of periods have been more like 30-31 days--probably do to the meds. So, if I am "late" I won't know if it's because of the tcm or if it's because my cycles are messed up due to the drugs.... Anyway, if nothing happens by next Sun./Monday, I will do a hpt. If af does come then I will continue to try. I think I will keep doing the tcm through May/June and if it doesn't seem to be working, then I will give it up. But still trying to keep a pma until then.

Hope everyone had a wonderful week-end. My last day of work was on Friday, but I have lots to do in the yard--if the rain holds off for a few days.

Hope--prayers are being sent out for your grandmother
Talk to you all later.

[waitingforMia]

Hope: Sorry about your grandma. Glad you siad she is doing better. SOunds like she has been through a lot with her health lately. And yes dh and I were apart 1.5 years when we dated, and 4 mos the day after we got married! So 3 weeks is easy! I still miss him like crazy!

kbat keep up that pma! Youa re doing a greta job. Really hope you get a miracle this month!


Nic: I know I cant understand your fears like Hope can, but just try to remain positive - those thoughts will do no good to you! Cherish this time and dont allow the devil to plant these doubts in your mind!

Indie: Woo hoo summer is here for you!! YEs stay out of the sun as much as possible. My dh would get rashes when he had to work in the sun when he was on those doxy pills.

Update on me: I spent yesterday in the hospital. I went to a clinic b/c I had bad chest pain that wouldnt go away fro 4 hours. My pulse at one time was 140. SO after consulting a bunch of ppl I went to clinic and they did ekg heart was fine - BUt dr was worried I might have a blood clot in lung! SO I got sent to ER and the doc right away was like it is prob acid reflux! I was like for 5 hours straight?? I have had acid reflux and this was not it! So he have me some damn GI cocktail and of course it didnt help! All the tests and chest xray came out fine - WHat ai think it is is pularysi (sp?) inflamation of a membrane in the lung. They ususally treat it with steroids, but cant since I am pg, said it will go away eventually on its own! ugh. So thankfully everything is ok. Dh is out of the country, so I was worried since he was not there with me.

So I am so happy nothing serious is wrong and i Will still be able to travel to Moldova in three weeks to meet up with dh!

I am praying about some alternative birthing options. I come from a long line of at home birthers, and seriously considering it. I will do some research and prayer first, but I really want the birth to be a comfortable, spiritual, and natural process. No decisions yet though.

I did tell my family today the news. They are very happy and excited for me. It was nice to finally tell. Talking about it makes it feel a bit more real.

I hope all of you are doing well. Still busy for me with work. Grades have to be in by May 14, so I will be freed up soon enough.

MP

[sonu911]

Thanks for all the concern and prayers. I hold them very close to my heart and I can't thankyou all enough for them.

I am not pregnant anymore, I lost my little angel last week sometime. Today doc did sonography but could not find any sac and my uterus had also shrunk in size.