Gulp....
thanks angela, feeling a sense of relief already!
we've started the ball rolling in central london because i work at the hospital, but if we go ahead with treatment will prob be in surrey, where we live.
need some time to let it all sink in, a hard part is i'm a midwife, so constantly surrounded by "blooming" people, asking if i have any children, sigh.
sample was 6 mil, 93% abnormal, 41% motility - prob means more to you guys than me at the moment?
A
we've started the ball rolling in central london because i work at the hospital, but if we go ahead with treatment will prob be in surrey, where we live.
need some time to let it all sink in, a hard part is i'm a midwife, so constantly surrounded by "blooming" people, asking if i have any children, sigh.
sample was 6 mil, 93% abnormal, 41% motility - prob means more to you guys than me at the moment?
A
Hi Amity,
You will soon be a able to understand it all when i went for my first consultation at kings my docter was really impressed with what i knew which made me feel really good.
Have you read all the stuff on here about icsi its all really helpful how long have you been trying ? we have been trying for 3 years now first went to my gp after a year of trying then got referred to our local hospital after many tests then finally last year we got referred to kings were we found out why we couldn't concieve which in a way was a relief to know that theres actually a reason behind it.
I'm very scared about having icsi but all the girls on here are great someones always got the answer to a question and if you ever need a good moan here is the place to it.
I do already have a daughter 7 year old from a previous relationship doesnt make the pain any less tho i want her to have a brother or sister like all her friends and to make her dream come true as well as mine and my partners.
i just hope i dont have to wait to long am waiting for a letter at the mo to tell me what the wait is doc already told me it would be this year tho so hopefully will be soon
i wish you lots and lots of luck and welcome again
Love Ang
You will soon be a able to understand it all when i went for my first consultation at kings my docter was really impressed with what i knew which made me feel really good.
Have you read all the stuff on here about icsi its all really helpful how long have you been trying ? we have been trying for 3 years now first went to my gp after a year of trying then got referred to our local hospital after many tests then finally last year we got referred to kings were we found out why we couldn't concieve which in a way was a relief to know that theres actually a reason behind it.
I'm very scared about having icsi but all the girls on here are great someones always got the answer to a question and if you ever need a good moan here is the place to it.
I do already have a daughter 7 year old from a previous relationship doesnt make the pain any less tho i want her to have a brother or sister like all her friends and to make her dream come true as well as mine and my partners.
i just hope i dont have to wait to long am waiting for a letter at the mo to tell me what the wait is doc already told me it would be this year tho so hopefully will be soon
i wish you lots and lots of luck and welcome again
Love Ang
Hello Amity
Welcome to the board. You have joined a very supportive site which you will find all the help you could possibly want. Everybody on here has got a story to tell and it makes you feel like you are so not alone.
I have had 1-IVF, 1-IVF/ICSI(half and half) and 1-ICSI as my eggs seemed to let too many sperm in at once (very accommodating eggs) but this is not what is supposed to happen so in the end we had all ICSI which had a much better fertilisation rate. I am now 19wks 5days pg and all my dreams have come true. It can happen for you if you are positive and focused. My world fell apart 4 years ago and as I was a nanny for many years never thought I wouldn't have my own baby to fuss over, as you well know being a midwife. I wish that I had found this site years ago but I will never look back. I had to have treatment as my tubes got buggered after a routine appendectomy in my 20's.
I am sorry that you have had this news today and I hope that by reading what others have got to say you will feel a bit more positive. I am proof that it can work as are many others on this board. Where abouts in Surrey will you be having your treatment?
Good Luck Amity,
Love Dagny x
Welcome to the board. You have joined a very supportive site which you will find all the help you could possibly want. Everybody on here has got a story to tell and it makes you feel like you are so not alone.
I have had 1-IVF, 1-IVF/ICSI(half and half) and 1-ICSI as my eggs seemed to let too many sperm in at once (very accommodating eggs) but this is not what is supposed to happen so in the end we had all ICSI which had a much better fertilisation rate. I am now 19wks 5days pg and all my dreams have come true. It can happen for you if you are positive and focused. My world fell apart 4 years ago and as I was a nanny for many years never thought I wouldn't have my own baby to fuss over, as you well know being a midwife. I wish that I had found this site years ago but I will never look back. I had to have treatment as my tubes got buggered after a routine appendectomy in my 20's.
I am sorry that you have had this news today and I hope that by reading what others have got to say you will feel a bit more positive. I am proof that it can work as are many others on this board. Where abouts in Surrey will you be having your treatment?
Good Luck Amity,
Love Dagny x
hi dagny, thanks for responding and many congratulations!
well our nearest place is woking but to be honest are still letting it all sink in.
the happiest and most difficult thing is that two of my dearest friends and my sister in law are all expecting at the moment, i am of course thrilled for them (esp Laura who had similar probs then went and did it all by herself but introduced me to this site) but sometimes its SUCH hard work being jolly about it all. my husband and i have passed many a "us next" glance as each one has been toasted at get togethers.
its knowing whether to bite the bullet, get on with treatment and see what happens or say, OK, time out lets enjoy 6 months of "time out". that may sound very flippant but i see SO many relationships put under strain. i want my husband to know that i wouldn't change a thing.
sigh...
A x
well our nearest place is woking but to be honest are still letting it all sink in.
the happiest and most difficult thing is that two of my dearest friends and my sister in law are all expecting at the moment, i am of course thrilled for them (esp Laura who had similar probs then went and did it all by herself but introduced me to this site) but sometimes its SUCH hard work being jolly about it all. my husband and i have passed many a "us next" glance as each one has been toasted at get togethers.
its knowing whether to bite the bullet, get on with treatment and see what happens or say, OK, time out lets enjoy 6 months of "time out". that may sound very flippant but i see SO many relationships put under strain. i want my husband to know that i wouldn't change a thing.
sigh...
A x
Hi Amity
I am also new to this site. I have known since 1996 that I would have to have IVF if I wanted to become pregnant after an ectopic pregnancy which resulted in 1 tube removed and 1 shown as blocked. Fortunately I have had many years to prepare mentally for this and my partner and I have visited the Lister Hospital in London in January for our first steps to pregnancy. It did come as a shock that my partner also has some problems and instead of IVF we have been advised to go for ICSI directly to increase our chances - all being well we shall start our first cycle at the end of February and hopefully ET end of March/early April. I would love to keep in touch with you to keep you posted as I am also new to this game and may be able to answer any questions for you.
Take care and stay in touch
Nickie
I am also new to this site. I have known since 1996 that I would have to have IVF if I wanted to become pregnant after an ectopic pregnancy which resulted in 1 tube removed and 1 shown as blocked. Fortunately I have had many years to prepare mentally for this and my partner and I have visited the Lister Hospital in London in January for our first steps to pregnancy. It did come as a shock that my partner also has some problems and instead of IVF we have been advised to go for ICSI directly to increase our chances - all being well we shall start our first cycle at the end of February and hopefully ET end of March/early April. I would love to keep in touch with you to keep you posted as I am also new to this game and may be able to answer any questions for you.
Take care and stay in touch
Nickie
hey nickie,
good luck with everything coming up....
seemed like yesterday when i found out, that i was dropped into deep water and i was struggling to keep my head above it, now it already feels like loads of people are not only swimming with me but throwing me lifelines as well - thanks guys!
plus sitting away tapping at this computer is very S in the city! (got to keep smiling!!)
nickie - you're up early..?
Amity
good luck with everything coming up....
seemed like yesterday when i found out, that i was dropped into deep water and i was struggling to keep my head above it, now it already feels like loads of people are not only swimming with me but throwing me lifelines as well - thanks guys!
plus sitting away tapping at this computer is very S in the city! (got to keep smiling!!)
nickie - you're up early..?
Amity
-
bubblymichelle
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1960
- Joined: Mon Jun 23, 2003 11:16 am
- Location: West Midlands
Hi Amity,
Firstly I would like to say welcome to the site, this is such a great place to be everyone is kind and friendly and will help you out the best they can with any questions.
I also had ICSI I had my first go and I can proudly say it worked for us and I am now pregnant. I am just waiting for my miracle baby to be born.
I hope all goes well for you with tmt and if you do need to ask anything, fire away, we are all here for each other.
Love
Shell.
40wks 5d pg
xx
Firstly I would like to say welcome to the site, this is such a great place to be everyone is kind and friendly and will help you out the best they can with any questions.
I also had ICSI I had my first go and I can proudly say it worked for us and I am now pregnant. I am just waiting for my miracle baby to be born.
I hope all goes well for you with tmt and if you do need to ask anything, fire away, we are all here for each other.
Love
Shell.
40wks 5d pg
xx
Hi again Amity
I know exactly what you mean about that sinking feeling but it doesn't take long to swim again like you said us girls on here all know that feeling all to well but we also all have great strength the more we sink and then swim again the stronger we all get
we are ALL superwomen
Love Ang
I know exactly what you mean about that sinking feeling but it doesn't take long to swim again like you said us girls on here all know that feeling all to well but we also all have great strength the more we sink and then swim again the stronger we all get
we are ALL superwomen
Love Ang
silly me didn't finish my msg to you
My best mate is also pregnant and yes i'm happy for her she knows what i'm going thro but sometimes i think god you b***h why couldn't you just wait for me (she already has two children) this sounds really nasty but sometimes i can't help but think it she knows the pain i'm in going thro all of this well she thinks she knows but no one really knows what its really like unless they are going thro it all emselves thats why i love this site sooooo much dont think i could cope without it.
My partner and i have got a lot closer going thro all of this he has learnt to leave me well alone when i'm in a bad mood and when i need a good cry he's always there he's great we have had bad times but we have come thro stronger each time i dont think i could stop for 6 months not now i would be thinking of it all the time and wouldn't be able to put it out of my head i wont rest or relax totally now till i hold my baby i'm getting closer and closer to my goal each day even tho it could be a while yet i take each day as it comes and try not to think of the next day if i did i'd crack up.
think i'v finished this time lol
love ang
My best mate is also pregnant and yes i'm happy for her she knows what i'm going thro but sometimes i think god you b***h why couldn't you just wait for me (she already has two children) this sounds really nasty but sometimes i can't help but think it she knows the pain i'm in going thro all of this well she thinks she knows but no one really knows what its really like unless they are going thro it all emselves thats why i love this site sooooo much dont think i could cope without it.
My partner and i have got a lot closer going thro all of this he has learnt to leave me well alone when i'm in a bad mood and when i need a good cry he's always there he's great we have had bad times but we have come thro stronger each time i dont think i could stop for 6 months not now i would be thinking of it all the time and wouldn't be able to put it out of my head i wont rest or relax totally now till i hold my baby i'm getting closer and closer to my goal each day even tho it could be a while yet i take each day as it comes and try not to think of the next day if i did i'd crack up.
think i'v finished this time lol
love ang
hi amity
sorry to hear about your news but im sure like me u will find this
site a great help, everyone is so lovely and full of information.
I think it will take some time for it all to sink in and yes the
whole procedure of injecting, et, ec and the dreaded 2wk wait
puts u and your partner under a lot of emotional pressure.
Only u know when its the right time to start, but i can assure
u we will all do our best here to help u thru it.
I did not have time on my side (43 dec just gone) so i had
4 ICI's treatments last year and finally got the +itve ive
always dreamed of on the last treatment, im only 8 wks
so early days, still have to keep pinching myself !!
So hopefully i wont have any probs meeting my friends
with children (something i use to avoid when i was
feeling down) and wont have to put up with people saying
"so u didnt want children then" !!!!
take care, let us know how u are doing
alison
sorry to hear about your news but im sure like me u will find this
site a great help, everyone is so lovely and full of information.
I think it will take some time for it all to sink in and yes the
whole procedure of injecting, et, ec and the dreaded 2wk wait
puts u and your partner under a lot of emotional pressure.
Only u know when its the right time to start, but i can assure
u we will all do our best here to help u thru it.
I did not have time on my side (43 dec just gone) so i had
4 ICI's treatments last year and finally got the +itve ive
always dreamed of on the last treatment, im only 8 wks
so early days, still have to keep pinching myself !!
So hopefully i wont have any probs meeting my friends
with children (something i use to avoid when i was
feeling down) and wont have to put up with people saying
"so u didnt want children then" !!!!
take care, let us know how u are doing
alison
Hi
I have just found this site. After over a year of messing around on the NHS in London my husband and I went to a private clinic last Monday. The diagnosis was mixed and I'm a bit lost as to what to do.
I have PCOS and my husband has poor sperm with 86% abnormalities, poor motility and only 16 million in count.
The consultant has given us a couple of options. He said that as it stands we have a 3-4% chance of conceiving naturally. He sadi he could treat my PCOS by either prescribing clomid for a few months or doing a laproscopy. However this owuldn't take inot account my husband's fertility problem, although it would boost our chances to 10% (a normal rate being 25%).
Alternatively he said that he would reccommend ICSI treatment for us giving us a 50% chance of conceiving.
After coming out of the appointment last Monday I felt like we'd gotten somewhere and would go thru with the ICSI and could see us having starting our family in a year (being optimistic that it would work first time). Now we are unsure that maybe we should try clomid first for a few months adn not go straight into the intensive treatment, as clomid might work. I don't think a laproscopy is a good option coz if we're going to have surgery then I'd rather go for the ICSI.
What do you think?
To make matters worse my sister-in-law decided to tell us on Tuesday (the day after our appointment) that she was pregnant...with twins!!
I feel really frustrated.
Then I got my period on Saturday and just watn to start something now. Am I being impatient?
I know there are plenty of people out there who have worse situations but that doesn't necessarily help me with dealing with mine.
Lost with what to do
I have just found this site. After over a year of messing around on the NHS in London my husband and I went to a private clinic last Monday. The diagnosis was mixed and I'm a bit lost as to what to do.
I have PCOS and my husband has poor sperm with 86% abnormalities, poor motility and only 16 million in count.
The consultant has given us a couple of options. He said that as it stands we have a 3-4% chance of conceiving naturally. He sadi he could treat my PCOS by either prescribing clomid for a few months or doing a laproscopy. However this owuldn't take inot account my husband's fertility problem, although it would boost our chances to 10% (a normal rate being 25%).
Alternatively he said that he would reccommend ICSI treatment for us giving us a 50% chance of conceiving.
After coming out of the appointment last Monday I felt like we'd gotten somewhere and would go thru with the ICSI and could see us having starting our family in a year (being optimistic that it would work first time). Now we are unsure that maybe we should try clomid first for a few months adn not go straight into the intensive treatment, as clomid might work. I don't think a laproscopy is a good option coz if we're going to have surgery then I'd rather go for the ICSI.
What do you think?
To make matters worse my sister-in-law decided to tell us on Tuesday (the day after our appointment) that she was pregnant...with twins!!
I feel really frustrated.
Then I got my period on Saturday and just watn to start something now. Am I being impatient?
I know there are plenty of people out there who have worse situations but that doesn't necessarily help me with dealing with mine.
Lost with what to do
Hi Amity,
let me also jump in and say welcome to the site, I joined a couple fo weeks ago when I was feeling too lonely and down and all the support from the girls has lifted my spirit tremendously. i know what a shock it is to find a problem with the sperm on top of other things, we had this a few years ago, i had just recovered from an operation removing endometric cysts and then we had really bad results for dh, he was shocked and we both experienced it as another blow. but as we got on the waiting list for icsi after a year we had some new tests and discovered his sperm was normal! the doctors could never explain what happened, they said he probably had an infection we did not know about. anyway every time we do ivf now ( we are on our third try) i worry there would be a problem but there ahs not been (other problems though...). all this is in a way irrelevant as icsi success rates are actually higher than ivf so you should be better off in a certain sense, but just wanted to tell you anything can happen, so don't despair.
love,
juliana
let me also jump in and say welcome to the site, I joined a couple fo weeks ago when I was feeling too lonely and down and all the support from the girls has lifted my spirit tremendously. i know what a shock it is to find a problem with the sperm on top of other things, we had this a few years ago, i had just recovered from an operation removing endometric cysts and then we had really bad results for dh, he was shocked and we both experienced it as another blow. but as we got on the waiting list for icsi after a year we had some new tests and discovered his sperm was normal! the doctors could never explain what happened, they said he probably had an infection we did not know about. anyway every time we do ivf now ( we are on our third try) i worry there would be a problem but there ahs not been (other problems though...). all this is in a way irrelevant as icsi success rates are actually higher than ivf so you should be better off in a certain sense, but just wanted to tell you anything can happen, so don't despair.
love,
juliana
Hi Amity
We are not that for away from each other if you are in Woking. We are going to good friends for dinner tonight in Old Woking.
I know what you mean about being gracious when good friends tell you that they are pregnant. It's so hard sometimes to smile and congratulate them when all the time inside you just want to shout and scream and cry. Loads of my friends went through a pregnancy boom at the same time and I was sick of christenings and false smiles and worst of all the sympathetic glances from people who knew our situation. They would come over and softly say 'you are so brave being here today' OMG they were the brave ones standing so close to me and saying THAT!!!!!! It does get better and it will be your turn one day. If you need time out occasionally then have it - you are in no way being flippant.
Hi Juliana
You story of your DH's sperm reminded me of when we were having all our tests years ago. My DH had his sperm test and the doctor informed us that there were some abnormal ones in there and I was beside myself as I thought not him as well as me. We couldn't understand it as he had a 8 year old daughter from a previous relationship. Then someone happened to ask if he had been ill with a temperature recently and a few weeks before we had been away skiing and he had had a raging temperature for the whole week. We were told to wait a bit and re-do the test and it all came back normal. We just hadn't realised that it could affect the sperm. I always made sure that he stayed away from anyone who was ill in the run up to my egg collection as I didn't want him to get another high temperature!
Hello Lost and Nickie
Welcome to the board. You will be amazed at how many people have shared experiences of similar natures. You are not alone. I have had 3 attempts of IVF/ICSI and I am now 20 weeks PG tomorrow with an ICSI baby. Never give up hope and ask as many questions on this board as you want, we are always here to help.
Your dreams are out there girls, just reach out and grab them with both hands!
Love Dagny x
We are not that for away from each other if you are in Woking. We are going to good friends for dinner tonight in Old Woking.
I know what you mean about being gracious when good friends tell you that they are pregnant. It's so hard sometimes to smile and congratulate them when all the time inside you just want to shout and scream and cry. Loads of my friends went through a pregnancy boom at the same time and I was sick of christenings and false smiles and worst of all the sympathetic glances from people who knew our situation. They would come over and softly say 'you are so brave being here today' OMG they were the brave ones standing so close to me and saying THAT!!!!!! It does get better and it will be your turn one day. If you need time out occasionally then have it - you are in no way being flippant.
Hi Juliana
You story of your DH's sperm reminded me of when we were having all our tests years ago. My DH had his sperm test and the doctor informed us that there were some abnormal ones in there and I was beside myself as I thought not him as well as me. We couldn't understand it as he had a 8 year old daughter from a previous relationship. Then someone happened to ask if he had been ill with a temperature recently and a few weeks before we had been away skiing and he had had a raging temperature for the whole week. We were told to wait a bit and re-do the test and it all came back normal. We just hadn't realised that it could affect the sperm. I always made sure that he stayed away from anyone who was ill in the run up to my egg collection as I didn't want him to get another high temperature!
Hello Lost and Nickie
Welcome to the board. You will be amazed at how many people have shared experiences of similar natures. You are not alone. I have had 3 attempts of IVF/ICSI and I am now 20 weeks PG tomorrow with an ICSI baby. Never give up hope and ask as many questions on this board as you want, we are always here to help.
Your dreams are out there girls, just reach out and grab them with both hands!
Love Dagny x